lilwetdick:
this is just nonsense

this what i hate to read, the pity and emotional game, the story that everything can end just in a day.

getting rich and going broke is a process, it just not start and end in a day

but how can you be earning 30k and be in marriage.

i cant allow a man earning 30k to marry my sister..simple as abc

this is what is driving men insane for wealth, when they don't have supportive wives or fiancee the pressure becomes too much and there you hear money ritual, robbing etc and nobody's meant to be poor but if everyone is rich who will sell the tomatoes and others, if you aren't the person to make the millions don't stress it i didn't say don't work but someone will make the millions for you it's life.

What about some guys under Npower program with 30k salary. Still yet many of them were able to get married with that salary. It depends on how you plane your life, and be prudence in spending. He that is receiving 30k today may become a millionaire tomorrow. Every body has his own time. It's better to start early on a low key than waiting for a man that have already arrived before getting married. You go wait tire.

Presently my salary is 30k and am married with 3kids

lilwetdick:


because it worked for you does not mean it will work for all

there are still many struggling families in Nigeria who will never make it.

Yes, it works for me too. I married my wife last year with Npower stipend of 30k. I got married in one room. But now to God be the glory, we are living comfortably in a self contain. (You know how much a self contain could cost in Warri). By the grace of God, in the first quarter of 2020, I'm opening a medicine store for her, with a budget of about 500k.
No matter how much you are receiving, if you cannot plan your life with your little income even if you are receiving 200k a month, will still remain broke always.





And our baby will be three months old on January 5th, 2020.

I realised one thing, we all think we are smart & sensible until life comes into place, most people talk like they can control the outcome of life till I read about some stuffs that made me wonder othewise, you should be among the richest men in the world if you have full control over your life as you are talking about, you said some stuffs in your comments later on...but I want to ask? what if you made it in your late 40s thats when you will then decide to marry?
I guess you are still a teenager the but live your life as you want cos it might work out fine for you.

lilwetdick:
this is just nonsense

this what i hate to read, the pity and emotional game, the story that everything can end just in a day.

getting rich and going broke is a process, it just not start and end in a day

but how can you be earning 30k and be in marriage.

i cant allow a man earning 30k to marry my sister..simple as abc

I keep laffin at those who think we marry money.

With a faithful & believing partner, the future is secure

Op, you people should stop this well-painted nonsense you post everywhere as sound advice. A man earning 30k should not even think of having a girlfriend not to talk of marry. Are you okay, 30k? Is that even enough to feed just you in a month as a normal human being should be fed? And how much do you think it costs to put a woman in the family way, and take care of her and the baby? If your child gets admitted, or your wife for the simplest case of malaria you will cough up at least 25k on the average. Your wife is pregnant and it is CS they recommend that she does, then what do you do? What exactly is your plan? Or you too would go to social media and start crying for people to come to your aid?

Let us stop dressing up nonsense and insanity in fine linen. If a man doesn't earn enough to comfortable take care of himself, his wife and at least a child, he has no business with marrying. And yes, it is a man's job to cater for his house. This is not a matter of romance or love or women being gold-digger. It is plain common sense. As a woman, your very life and breath may depend on it if you marry a man that cannot cater for his family's needs. Some of us have examples of women who lost their lives for no other reason than that the husband could not afford the cost of CS at the hospital. Most of those husbands have since remarried. Love is no longer blind; all those stupid love stories you watch on Tv don't often tell you what happens after the highly decorated wedding ceremonies. Love now has a brain, allow it to use it.

(Except your plan as a man earning 30k is to marry a woman that earns enough to keep the house running.)

Imagine a man earned 30,000 monthly, he didn't even think of Instagram marriage in first place he just zero his mind and prepare for low-key marriage, and his in-law collaborate with village people happily award him with 2.3 million naira (very long) marriage list,
Water dong pas garri, you don't need prophet or babalawo or even jazman to inform you that YOUR MARRIAGE IS INCONCLUSIVE,

I rest my case, because marriage no by force.

Sorry dear.

donchyke1975:
Presently my salary is 30k and am married with 3kids

ChieduJoshua081:
My colleague at the office is married, has 2children, has a bike, and is staying in a single room self contain and our salary is 17k so just mind your business.

The children are the victims and it is unforgivable to put children through that.

vickydankal:


You are funny.
There are many like manner ladies out there unfortunately just a handful are still in churches. Look well be real, don't try so hard to impress. God will send her to you amen oooo. Invite me for the d day oooo.

Amen....

wany:

And if I may ask how are catering for your Lady, boy don't be deceive she has a side guy picking her bills,only waiting for jungle to mature so that she let go and hang on you fully ,use your brain.
Even at a PhD level you still sound dumb.

No wonder some people are reasoning upside down. Can't she carter for herself while her man gets better?

Making women seem like destitutes that can't survive unless a man carters for them.

I know someone whose wife bore the family responsibility for up to a year, nobody knew until he posted it online appreciating his wife. He got a job afterwards.

larryking540:
Why op they post Watin he kw say no day possible ,,

How much is 1 bag of rice again i forgot ?

you and your family will finish one bag of rice in a month?

Pwettyella:

Hmmm
It's the duty of a husband to take care of his wife

...and the duty of the wife to support her husband.

lilwetdick:


if you have a sister, will your father allow a man earning 30k to marry your sister? pls be realistic

Do you go to ask what he is earning before you marry him? That is an insult if you ask me. Are you interested in what I earn? What do you earn? What's your worth? Nonsense.

Minimum wage is 30k ,so do u wan2 kill d man, apart from other side
runs

Mgbadike80:
If the man is of sound character and focused in life then the answer is yes. My sister should work to support her husband, she's not a piece of furniture in his home. I believe that's what the bible said too.

The woman shouldn't be a piece of furniture in his home... okay, we got that but just a few questions for you. How will they sort out rent, feeding, transport, medical bills, clothing and other miscellaneous with 30 thousand naira? Is the woman supposed to pay for all these with her own money? How then is this spousal support? Because you said "a woman should work to support her husband", emphasis on the word support
Bros, I really don't understand the point you're trying to make.

bizme:
Op, you people should stop this well-painted nonsense you post everywhere as sound advice. A man earning 30k should not even think of having a girlfriend not to talk of marry. Are you okay, 30k? Is that even enough to feed just you in a month as a normal human being should be fed? And how much do you think it costs to put a woman in the family way, and take care of her and the baby? If your child gets admitted, or your wife for the simplest case of malaria you will cough up at least 25k on the average. Your wife is pregnant and it is CS they recommend that she does, then what do you do? What exactly is your plan? Or you too would go to social media and start crying for people to come to your aid?

Let us stop dressing up nonsense and insanity in fine linen. If a man doesn't earn enough to comfortable take care of himself, his wife and at least a child, he has no business with marrying. And yes, it is a man's job to cater for his house. This is not a matter of romance or love or women being gold-digger. It is plain common sense. As a woman, your very life and breath may depend on it if you marry a man that cannot cater for his family's needs. Some of us have examples of women who lost their lives for no other reason than that the husband could not afford the cost of CS at the hospital. Most of those husbands have since remarried. Love is no longer blind; all those stupid love stories you watch on Tv don't often tell you what happens after the highly decorated wedding ceremonies. Love now has a brain, allow it to use it.

(Except your plan as a man earning 30k is to marry a woman that earns enough to keep the house running.)

God bless you real good. You took the words right out of my mouth.

lilwetdick:


17k with 2 kids and proper planning..

father, mother and 2 kids = 4 mouth

17k to take care of 4 mouth monthly...

17k/30 days=567 naira daily for 4 mouth

this is impossible

The man is a truck load of corruption in that office. He will definitely engage in illegalities to supplement his unreasonable salary.

DECENCY3:



In my case I married a man who was earning 8k as salary(2008) I saw a future in him before marrying him. I became an emergency manager. Few years later God open doors his take home all joined together was up to a #100k .

His true colours came forth: nagging, verbally abusive, nagging, etc even said the 3rd pregnancy isn't his own. I nearly aborted but kept encouraging myself only for me to deliver a boy(the only boy and last baby). He womanised with impunity and refused my and my 3 children entry into the house.

I tried everything possible to save the Marriage but no way. I involved his people who rebuked him but he kept them malice saying I stab him, poisoned him now I have charmed his ppl to back me up. I reduced to times two but time healed the wound.

I cursed him with every fiber in me, cursed him while naked with tears, etc and finally moved on taking care if my kids. His life shattered, he is shamelessly back using the children as cover up. Paying their fees and other things. But I am done and dusted with him. I am trying to secure my future first before I will know whether to consider him or not.

Some men can be so mean

Some men when they are struggling, they can be real humble. But when money comes, they think they deserve all instagram slay queens. Same with young boys who are unemployed. You see them make good plans for themselves. Immediately good job comes, they dish those plans away and rush to facebook, twitter, and instagram. You will see them in the DMs of those slayqueens where they spend money trying to impress them or sleep with them.

Those are the people that poverty made humble, they are not humble as it were.

I am sorry for your experience. And he was earning 100k oo, not even a big money and he was already feeling himself.

Wroxxane:


The woman shouldn't be a piece of furniture in his home... okay, we got that but just a few questions for you. How will they sort out rent, feeding, transport, medical bills, clothing and other miscellaneous with 30 thousand naira? Is the woman supposed to pay for all these with her own money? How then is this spousal support? Because you said "a woman should work to support her husband", emphasis on the word support
Bros, I really don't understand the point you're trying to make.

See, they is a large place for love and happiness in marriage, same space also goes for money but the former is more important. One characteristics of money is that it is insatiable.
Most people talking about 100k, it's not even enough. Infact, my summed income sometime ago was above 400k and I still never saw it as enough. I was faced with a lot of responsibilities that even the 400k wasn't enough.

But in those times, I knew it was not about money but true love and happiness. My sister got married to a struggling lawyer, I was many times richer than him but she was happy with him and wanted to help him achieve his dream. They got married and things has still not changed as expected but each time I call them, you would see the joy and smiles on their faces. I know she's happy and living her life. That is what life is bro.

With all the money I had, I wasn't leading a happy life as it were. I was struggling, trying to earn more because I was afraid it will go down some day. I was struggling to increase it and earn more. At a point, I started looking for true joy and happiness. All the ladies that came afterwards where people who came because they saw there's money. I have my own car, live good and even have few lands. The dreams are there yet it's been from one lady to another. You never can tell who truly loves you.

We shouldn't place emphasis on money. It is not the solution to life. You will keep preaching money until you raise young guys who will earn money but lose purpose or understanding of the true meaning of life.

Thiwalade:



I am a young man in my mid twenties, I am a PhD student in a federal University earning 10k as stipend. Do I have enough vision yet?

You have vision but yet to be financially stable. You will be in a short while. But I'm sure you do not plan to marry yet.

DECENCY3:



In my case I married a man who was earning 8k as salary(2008) I saw a future in him before marrying him. I became an emergency manager. Few years later God open doors his take home all joined together was up to a #100k .

His true colours came forth: nagging, verbally abusive, nagging, etc even said the 3rd pregnancy isn't his own. I nearly aborted but kept encouraging myself only for me to deliver a boy(the only boy and last baby). He womanised with impunity and refused my and my 3 children entry into the house.

I tried everything possible to save the Marriage but no way. I involved his people who rebuked him but he kept them malice saying I stab him, poisoned him now I have charmed his ppl to back me up. I reduced to times two but time healed the wound.

I cursed him with every fiber in me, cursed him while naked with tears, etc and finally moved on taking care if my kids. His life shattered, he is shamelessly back using the children as cover up. Paying their fees and other things. But I am done and dusted with him. I am trying to secure my future first before I will know whether to consider him or not.

Some men can be so mean

Sometime in 2009, I was earning 6k. The lady I was with was the one who practically wooed me, and even asked for marriage. Being a master's holder in Mathematics, and being also a man who knew my mathematics like the back of my hand, she always told me I would do something great in the world.

She was nice and supportive in her own way, but she was rude, and could be insensitive sometimes. I am not a headstrong person but when she was becoming excessively controlling and manipulative, I had to become stubborn myself over things that I felt strongly about. During an argument, she told me that "She was managing me" and I told her that "Not having money does not mean I have to become your slave".

I saw hell. But people out there (family and friends) would be seeing a good girl in her because she was staying with a broke guy like me. Anyway, 2011, I won a scholarship and went for a theology program in Ireland, afterwhich I went for a master's in India. The church was paying me because I was ministering as well as studying. My salary had increased by then. Moreover, I was also teaching mathematics online and contributing to online textbooks for open distance learning. So, I was beginning to earn some money.

So, I sent money home from India. About 200k in naira. That was 2013. It went into her account and I instructed her to give 100 to my godmother. 50 to my dad and to keep 50 for herself. This woman said nasty things to me based on that distribution. I explained my reason for the distribution through email because she would not let me explain on the phone. My dad received pensions from the government and earned from the church where he plays the organ. I sent 100k to my godmother because since I lost my mom, she has been extraordinarily supportive without complaining one bit. Back in university, my dad always sent 8k to me as pocket money. It was my godmother that used to add another 8k to make me live well. And then I told this woman that I sent 50k to her because she had a job. Anyway, next time, I sent another 200k and asked her to take 100k for herself and give 50-50 to my godmother and dad. Just like before, she started a fight accusing me of not being transparent, that I must have sent money to my godmother somehow and was using this distribution to fool her. Then she started her usual tirade about how she stayed with me when I was as poor as a church rat. How many women could do that? Bla bla bla.

Anyway, when I came back to the country, I got a job with a steady income. And I told her to just leave my life for good. Initially, she was remorseful. But when I refused to go back on my words, she began her nonsense tirades.

My point is: Staying with a man when he had nothing is not enough for him to marry you or be good to you when he makes it. How did you treat him when he had nothing? The one that even hurt me the most was the comparison she always made and how she would make it seem like she could leave me anytime and any rich man would be waiting to accept her without stress. It was her favorite way of manipulating me into doing whatever she wanted.

lilwetdick:
this is just nonsense

this what i hate to read, the pity and emotional game, the story that everything can end just in a day.

getting rich and going broke is a process, it just not start and end in a day

but how can you be earning 30k and be in marriage.

i cant allow a man earning 30k to marry my sister..simple as abc

How much do you earn fool?
Okay go and marry your sister.
People like you are the problems you have in this country

lilwetdick:


she is not at home, i wont choose for her but i know that men earning 30k cant meet her, they will be intimidated

I have read your argument from first page to this page. I don't think you are making a complete argument by not considering other factors that affects marriage. Like someone said, his sister and her husband got married both unemployed.

Very soon, you will soon realize that while money rules the world, it is not the ultimate. I read where you were pressured to say that a man earning 100k should consider money. My first salara was above 100k and I considered myself a poor and broke boy. I mean, you could see those boys doing business in Ogbete, Onitsha and Aba who earn that within 15 days and they are not still proud. Even when it doubled, they were things I can't still do with such salary. In fact, a man earning 200k will hardly save money to buy a good car (not Nigerian used, except he borrowed money to buy the car).

Let's put things straight, a university graduate assistant earns between 95-100k (before tax). Most Federal Ministry workers earn 80-120k, and except you are working in FIRS, NCC, CAC or any of those top agencies, you are still not earning as you should earn. In fact, the starting salary for FIRS (level is betwen 180-220k. Though you will argue about their allowances etc. My point is, when you see people from the aforementioned places of work, you will give out your sister to them for marriage.

But the above salaries are not upto what those in Coal Camp Enugu, Wuse Market, etc earn and don't even consider themselves as being rich or speak ill of those earning far below.

Soon, the people that believe in what you preach will begin to earn money, and then think they deserve every lady on Facebook. You'd see them in the DMs of every slayqueen on facebook because they think that with their money/job, they should be with the top woman in the society. And those ladies in turn, will drain them and render them useless.

I have a friend that earns about 170k, before the month ends, he will come begging to borrow money.

Hello Guys,
I started my family 3 years ago with a salary of 40k per month and now I earn over 1million Naira. I remember every time I come home I will give my wife 30k to run the house for the month and I will manage with 10k ever month and my wife will naked and pray on the money and now over night God bless us with a amazing Job that surprises us. Don’t wait for you to have millions to marry you need grace..

DECENCY3:



In my case I married a man who was earning 8k as salary(2008) I saw a future in him before marrying him. I became an emergency manager. Few years later God open doors his take home all joined together was up to a #100k .

His true colours came forth: nagging, verbally abusive, nagging, etc even said the 3rd pregnancy isn't his own. I nearly aborted but kept encouraging myself only for me to deliver a boy(the only boy and last baby). He womanised with impunity and refused my and my 3 children entry into the house.

I tried everything possible to save the Marriage but no way. I involved his people who rebuked him but he kept them malice saying I stab him, poisoned him now I have charmed his ppl to back me up. I reduced to times two but time healed the wound.

I cursed him with every fiber in me, cursed him while naked with tears, etc and finally moved on taking care if my kids. His life shattered, he is shamelessly back using the children as cover up. Paying their fees and other things. But I am done and dusted with him. I am trying to secure my future first before I will know whether to consider him or not.

Some men can be so mean

I so sorry for all that you have been through. But can I suggest that you should convert your naked cursing to naked prayers. Because some of the curses you lay on him if you didn't remember to revoke them could affect you and your children, especially when you accept him back. Is it possible that you may have changed in no small way that may have motivated his actions (it is not a justification though). Curses are easier to place on people than to remove, all through the scriptures, you will see curses but hardly see when they were removed.

You could encourage your husband for you both to meet a pastor or consillor. Be more open to each other. Discus sexual fantasies, small comings and heart desires and make amends where necessary.

My husband and I have our differences and many times we quarrel. But our secret is never involve a third party, never allow neighbours or the children to hear our voice, when visitors come in the middle of our quarrels we hug and pretend. No matter the level of quarrel whoever going out there must be a big hug, then at night we talk about it and settle sometimes with bed ministrations. Never allow anger to exceed a day, men have pride, one of the way to get them sometimes is to massage their ego. (doesn't work on all men)

For me I can say sorry for Africa, my home is more important than my ego. If not if he sends me packing my own done be. He will marry younger, beautiful and sweet 16 to come and enjoy my sweat. Mba ooooo. I'd rather make peace with him. As far as he js not beating me. I go no where

lilwetdick:


i have seen life, people marrying anyhow and giving birth to kids that will be future armed robbers and prostitutes

ok. Now I understand you better. Nothing do u

As in you are earning 30k and no savings,no investment? Then your wife or her family should be in position to support you. Why not start by improving your income by increasing your stream so when children start coming you can take care of them. Don't build your castles in the air be realistic. But if no more hope except the 30k,wife no income, then go marry and una go manage. Everybody has the right to love and family. But it no go easy especially if you live in the city.

lilwetdick:


exactly, that is why he shouldnt be married at the first place..let him sort his life first then think about marriage

what is 30k? can 30k pay for rent even if he saves.

pls lets be realistic, it is not by force to marry...if both man and woman cant take care of themselves they shoudnt get married...simple abc

people write emotional stuff to convince men earning 30k to go take responsibilities they cant afford, after when the nagging and abuse come they start thinking about sucide or divorce.

Thanks for this comment, 30K in this current hardship is not realistic except you are staying in the village.it is better to double your hustle as a single guy to ensure your family is stable and have the basics (Good shelter & food). But if you have a partner who is fully aware of your current situation and has that drive to work towards getting out of poverty with you then get married to that person because the energy and support will be the driving force to take you out of your lowest low.

Wyclefniranz:
you and your family will finish one bag of rice in a month?

So u prefer I go to the market and buy 1 cup of rice to feed myself self and my wife and kids + my dog ,,,

Think man ,Nigeria had made us to see life to always manage ,I have been opportune to meet people that don't eat day break food ,baba no b same na forming things ,,the day d person try am na hospital e land put ,try travel are u aware 30k is not up to 100dollars

Your mom sorry to hear that
That relationship must have been extraordinaire your GF just felt entitled. I am sure she made you a better man
Why would you be sending them money through her

BluntBoy:


Sometime in 2009, I was earning 6k. The lady I was with was the one who practically wooed me, and even asked for marriage. Being a master's holder in Mathematics, and being also a man who knew my mathematics like the back of my hand, she always told me I would do something great in the world.

She was nice and supportive in her own way, but she was rude, and could be insensitive sometimes. I am not a headstrong person but when she was becoming excessively controlling and manipulative, I had to become stubborn myself over things that I felt strongly about. During an argument, she told me that "She was managing me" and I told her that "Not having money does not mean I have to become your slave".

I saw hell. But people out there (family and friends) would be seeing a good girl in her because she was staying with a broke guy like me. Anyway, 2011, I won a scholarship and went for a theology program in Ireland, afterwhich I went for a master's in India. The church was paying me because I was ministering as well as studying. My salary had increased by then. Moreover, I was also teaching mathematics online and contributing to online textbooks for open distance learning. So, I was beginning to earn some money.

So, I sent money home from India. About 200k in naira. That was 2013. It went into her account and I instructed her to give 100 to my godmother. 50 to my dad and to keep 50 for herself. This woman said nasty things to me based on that distribution. I explained my reason for the distribution through email because she would not let me explain on the phone. My dad received pensions from the government and earned from the church where he plays the organ. I sent 100k to my godmother because since I lost my mom, she has been extraordinarily supportive without complaining one bit. Back in university, my dad always sent 8k to me as pocket money. It was my godmother that used to add another 8k to make me live well. And then I told this woman that I sent 50k to her because she had a job. Anyway, next time, I sent another 200k and asked her to take 100k for herself and give 50-50 to my godmother and dad. Just like before, she started a fight accusing me of not being transparent, that I must have sent money to my godmother somehow and was using this distribution to fool her. Then she started her usual tirade about how she stayed with me when I was as poor as a church rat. How many women could do that? Bla bla bla.

Anyway, when I came back to the country, I got a job with a steady income. And I told her to just leave my life for good. Initially, she was remorseful. But when I refused to go back on my words, she began her nonsense tirades.

My point is: Staying with a man when he had nothing is not enough for him to marry you or be good to you when he makes it. How did you treat him when he had nothing? The one that even hurt me the most was the comparison she always made and how she would make it seem like she could leave me anytime and any rich man would be waiting to accept her without stress. It was her favorite way of manipulating me into doing whatever she wanted.