strungup79:


I'm always out of town looking for one job or business. I've just been unfortunate that all my efforts have yielded little or no fruit. It's almost as if there's a curse working against me.

Eeyah

There is no curse working against you.

It's just part of life. Later you will bounce back on your feet. Keep trying, keep praying, be positive minded. Things will change for good in your career.
It's all about timing.
God will see you through, amen.

And also seat your wife down and talk to her amicably. I think there is communication gap between both of you.
It's well.

strungup79:


You are just like my wife. If marriage is about control, why marry? Why not stay on your own? Making money is not about hustling, if it was i'd be earning over three times what my wife earns. Luck, favour also plays a role. Maybe God just wants to show me who I married.

She is telling you the absolute truth.

Marriages are economic relationships & for centuries, males who gained economic success used this to dominate the females.

Economic dominance is the only reason males have control of a marriage. Once that economic dominance is lost to the female, what will follow is a change in power dynamics.

The only way males without economic dominance in a marriage will have power dynamics in their favour, is because the female wishes for it to be so. Nothing spiritual here.

Be smart, go get your economic earning power multiplied manifold. The other option is to give up on the economic relationship.

This is what happens when everyone belives that the ability to provide and being the man should be the only defining factors in a relationship.

pocohantas:


He hasn't recovered, he should be useful for now. Not for his wife, but his kids. I don't care what he does with his wife when he recovers, she probably doesn't care too and if all OP said is the truth, she has waited so long for this moment. Some women just need men for the marriage and (temporary) comfort men can provide. This is a model that is okay for the Nigerian man too, even though they always cry when it backfires.

Nigerian men only win bread, they don't know how to win any other thing- even the hearts and sympathy of their women. Always thinking everything is manee, manee, manee.

This is Nigeria, where 11 is the age of consent to marry. Leave US matter alone, they push thier agenda and I will push mine

Martinez39:
As I have said before, classical feminists like you won't be used to judge what feminism is today. Misandrists are the major players in the feminist movement and they are here to stay until men wake up. As long as they are major players, people will inevitably see feminism as a misandric machination. It blows down to the fact that actions speaks louder than words. Besides, the unfair advantages and laws contemporary feminists fought for are secretly enjoyed by all women even if they claim otherwise. No woman in the US (be it classical feminist, contemporary feminist, or traditional) has ever vigorously protested against the unfair divorce laws and child support laws. If we have such laws in Nigeria, this would be the same thing.

So don't be annoyed, as long as these misandrists are the overwhelming majority, feminism will always be seen as a misandric machination.

Fear this type of people. She is one of them

funmisticqueen:
fact of life, money changes both men and women because it comes with control. It's human nature

Your wife is not emasculating you, you are just losing control of the power and finances in the family. Do you know how much BS women tolerate from men in marriages because he earns more?

Uncle, go and hustle or give your pants over to your wife and stop complaining

funmisticqueen:
fact of life, money changes both men and women because it comes with control. It's human nature

Your wife is not emasculating you, you are just losing control of the power and finances in the family. Do you know how much BS women tolerate from men in marriages because he earns more?

Uncle, go and hustle or give your pants over to your wife and stop complaining

Does feminism entail stupidity?

funmisticqueen:
fact of life, money changes both men and women because it comes with control. It's human nature

Your wife is not emasculating you, you are just losing control of the power and finances in the family. Do you know how much BS women tolerate from men in marriages because he earns more?

Uncle, go and hustle or give your pants over to your wife and stop complaining

Look at your shallow brain... I fear for your husband cos you can easily charm him to run down for you to have control if you havnt already done that... The summary about you is you are a coward and insecured ..

If to control women with money is the reason men are getting married, most would not be married.. We would rather pay off baby mamas like what u deserve to be, use you for sex, remain single for ever and take care of families...

The heart of most women are wicked, d only tin dt supresses their wickedness is giving them,money, if they by chance have more than you, they will forget the years you have done for them...

They are the principal child abuser in d world, yet a little yell from a man to den would stir uproar...



Just imagine if some women were men! Life will be terrible

Bro when i read all your post here, God told me something strange hidding in your house that against u. Put yoursnlf into white fasting for seven days. Pray to God to reveal the work of devil in your life and also destroy it. Please make sure you do that. May God have mercy on you in Jesus name, amen.

If you marry 20 different women at different times ,woman will always be woman ,The real attitudes of human shows when money comes ,its human Nature ,though we hear the likes of Abiola Erelu Dosunmu much more richer than her husband ,yet she has been Submissive but that is very very rare .For now do not let that escalete into bigger issues.She definitely must have friends influencing her more .Oga ,go and look for a place to go put yourself in now ,before you go ,At midnight wake her up and talk to her before you move but gint tell her you are leaving the home for now ,Try make contacts with old friends that could help positively ,go on some days fasting and serious prayers for open Doors ,I believe Almighty God would open a way for you ,do stay away from Messing sexually arround .Just leave that home for now.

row2ray:
Sorry bro, I feel your pain.:..but I’m honesty I doubt any marriage recovers from this... in my case i stayed and when things improved I stayed like it was the same doing what ever I wanted without being open about it.... then I bought her a car and divorced

Wow. How did that go? Did she willingly accept the divorce? Did you try to make things worse?

funmisticqueen:
fact of life, money changes both men and women because it comes with control. It's human nature

Your wife is not emasculating you, you are just losing control of the power and finances in the family. Do you know how much BS women tolerate from men in marriages because he earns more

Uncle, go and hustle or give your pants over to your wife and stop complaining

Reading this kind of comments this new year is painful. But it's the world we are in.

Reversal of role you say? When she is consulting her family for decisions, you call that reversal?, or buying properties without the man knowing, also reversal?, When the man was the major earner, did he buy properties without his wife knowing? or did his family take over their home? I then wonder where the reversal is.

The truth is that most women dont handle money, fame and fortune so well. Infact the same way alcohol intoxicates a man, is the same way money intoxicates a woman.

At last we will all be fine.

Cheers

MrSly:

Does feminism entail stupidity?

I am not a feminist so ask a feminist

Every situation is different. In this particular case, thus man has been shouldering responsibilities of his home without complaints for close to 15 years. He did not maltreat, beat or bully his wife. If he did, i would condemn it. No one deserves to be treated with disdain wether male or female.

He is having a dry season and he is discovering a person that he never knew existed. The former loving wife is bringing out her true colours with the full support of her family because she is making more money.

This is not something new and it shows the woman never loved him as a person in the first place. That is why i never seduce a woman with money...it will backfire in the long run. A wise elderly man once told me that " that a woman has children for you does not mean she can not kill you if she wants to"

If she is not attracted to your personality then let her be.

This man will surely get back on his feet and he will decide wether to continue with the marriage or marry anothet wife. But for now talking or trying to reason with the wife will never work.

Let him lick his wounds, file the matter for a future date,bide his time and dig himself out of the financial mess that he is in.

Then he must become mysterious to the wife who has already seen him finish.

" hey i wanted to confirm if you have gotten to your room safe and sound. Because only then can i sleep peacefully " ... na i take catch my woman. People think sey na jazz i dey use for am. She is always tensed due to the demands of her job, i learned to become her in-house comedian and take the stress off her.

A woman will collect money from one guy and give it to another. An ex girlfriend told me one day " that men make the mistake of thinking money is all women want" she said do you know why i like you- you make me feel good about myself.

Read books, learn history, be intriguing, be mean , be nice, learn how to listen actively and she will tell you dark secrets , do outlandish things, be extra, be bold, be naughty, be good be anything but ordinary...and never place her on a pedestal.

simonlee:
simple trick....

use a strange number to forward a text to your phone that reads "i will give you N20million and an oil company job if you divorce your wife and marry me"...
then see if she wouldn't go back to factory settings!

So what happens if she has been looking for a good opportunity to leave the man?

strungup79:


I'm always out of town looking for one job or business. I've just been unfortunate that all my efforts have yielded little or no fruit. It's almost as if there's a curse working against me.

Try changing your focus of business or learn a new skill or trade, it will improve your streams of income.

funmisticqueen:
fact of life, money changes both men and women because it comes with control. It's human nature

Your wife is not emasculating you, you are just losing control of the power and finances in the family. Do you know how much BS women tolerate from men in marriages because he earns more?

Uncle, go and hustle or give your pants over to your wife and stop complaining

Truth be told, you are just a very foolish woman. Honestly, I pity your husband, that's of course, if you are even married.

An average Nigerian woman that is wise should know this: Becoming a wife is very easy, but maintaining the position requires great wisdom and humility. But with your post, you haven't displayed wisdom.

And again, its not very easy to get a submissive wife these days. The reverse tends to be the case.

sgtponzihater1:


Reading this kind of comments this new year is painful. But it's the world we are in.

Reversal of role you say? When she is consulting her family for decisions, you call that reversal?, or buying properties without the man knowing, also reversal?, When the man was the major earner, did he buy properties without his wife knowing? or did his family take over their home? I then wonder where the reversal is.

The truth is that most women dont handle money, fame and fortune so well. Infact the same way alcohol intoxicates a man, is the same way money intoxicates a woman.

At last we will all be fine.

Cheers

cheers!! Where have you been?

funmisticqueen:
when did I beg on this forum for a man?

Stop deluding yourself

You look funny, jokes aside!

funmisticqueen:
Time has been humbling me since secondary school and med school.2019 taught me to fight and keep fighting and I am still fighting.

I have learnt to rely on only myself, people will only disappoint you. Always look out for yourself.

Chai...I imagine you typing this with tears and gnashing your teeth

Don't worry, 2020 will be a better year. It's totally understandable that when love disappoints you, you tend to give up on it and become bitter (like you've done all year 2019).

You'll find love 2020 and you will understand that there is more to life than been a man hater...Prick sweet (ask all your popular feminists).

strungup79:


I'm always out of town looking for one job or business. I've just been unfortunate that all my efforts have yielded little or no fruit. It's almost as if there's a curse working against me.

This last statement is not a good place to be. Don't get into the blame game, it will distract you. Also distracting is your wife's new attitude towards you. The single most important thing you need right now, apart from God's favour, is focus.

Focus on getting back your business, dont react negatively if she misbehaves, ignore her if need be. Increase your research and pray before going into any new business, God will crown your efforts this new year. Once you get your title back as head of the family, she'll come into her senses. Nothing new under the sun. Your case is not the first and sadly won't be the last, but from experience, it'll end the same way most do, if you handle it right. I stopped blaming women a long time ago, it's not their fault. It's their make up.

funmisticqueen:
fact of life, money changes both men and women because it comes with control. It's human nature

Your wife is not emasculating you, you are just losing control of the power and finances in the family. Do you know how much BS women tolerate from men in marriages because he earns more?

Uncle, go and hustle or give your pants over to your wife and stop complaining

As Op as already pointed out you are no different from his wife

LordKO:
If you're a Mech. Engr. with at least 2 years previous work experience in the petroleum industry, send me a PM immediately.

As for your wife and her recent attitude, it's obvious that you've been living with a frenemy all this while. Only few men are lucky, and can be lucky, to marry virtuous/submissive women. Since she's of the small-minded stock, you've to master the art of treating small-minded people and mete out same to her - if you aren't small-minded like her too.

Hello,
Can you list one or two tips on handling a small minded wife? It will be beneficial.

funmisticqueen:
Lots of beautiful, single older women with children do not bother to remarry. Have you ever wondered why?

Peace of mind is more important than having some phallus around the house who thinks he's a 'good man' and God's gift to women.

You got me laughing really hard but damn if only such intellectual beauty was physically matched but too bad, we can't have it all

braine:


Wow. How did that go? Did she willingly accept the divorce? Did you try to make things worse?

I’m not sure I understand your question

Marriage is a scam I will keep saying it.

Plead:


Because the man still except the woman to cook,clean and do all the rest despite the woman bringing in all the money needed!

..That doesn't change anything.If she was doing it when the man was financially capable, I don't see what should stop her from doing it now, worst case scenario, she could employ a maid for that purpose.

It is not when your partner is down that you trash them,you are meant to cover their unclothedness at that point.

Money is an enabler. I don't know how the man treated his family, most especially the wife when he was the breadwinner because this might be part of the reasons why she is behaving that one.Women are generally very loyal.

Bro, forget am. Even stars change over time. Only God knows the truth and no man can truly see the future , nor the character that will manifest in the future.

Kendumazy:
I guess you didn't pray about your relationship or you didn't get to do spiritual consultation about the kind of person your wife is. See, when it comes to two people coming together to get married. There are a lot of things involved. A wife star might superceed that of the husband and atimes it could be the other way round. These are parts of what parents sees that make them stand their ground that their son or daughter won't get married to a particular person. Not that the person is bad but it's just that, we all have the star we carry. You don't need to fight your wife. You just need some prayer or spiritual journey to see what could be the cause of your downfall or you can try and leave the home for like a month and watch any changes.

funmisticqueen:
That's is the US and first world country struggles are not my struggles. I wish that every woman will attain financial independence

Lol. This statement doesn't make sense. I was only trying to show that the victim mentality you are displaying is a global phenomenon that is why I mentioned USA. Also, I wanted to show that even if women are liberated and give equal rights and opportunities as men, they will still cry victim.

There is nothing holding women back and there is no structure in place to make things easier for men. Everyone, men and women, must work and earn. Even you yourself are a doctor, isn't that equal rights and opportunities? Didn't you earn your MBBS in the same way men did? Was there any structure put in place to make things harder for females or pay them less? Even in your class, aren't there boys that were withdrawn after failing in med school? Where is the male privilege you are talking about? You are liberated enough to lead the life you want yet you cry patriarchy and embrace victimhood.

internationalman:

so women don't divorce rich dude..

ubunja write and i quote ''the less worthy a man feels about himself the more he uses money to chase girls to compensate for his low self esteem.

This is true

strungup79:


You are just like my wife. If marriage is about control, why marry? Why not stay on your own? Making money is not about hustling, if it was i'd be earning over three times what my wife earns. Luck, favour also plays a role. Maybe God just wants to show me who I married.

quite true.I pray you take the leadership of your family in Jesus name.let the mantle change hands so as you'll be restored back to your lost glory, as you've seen who she truly is.

pocohantas:


He hasn't recovered, he should be useful for now. Not for his wife, but his kids. I don't care what he does with his wife when he recovers, she probably doesn't care too and if all OP said is the truth, she has waited so long for this moment. Some women just need men for the marriage and (temporary) comfort men can provide. This is a model that is okay for the Nigerian man too, even though they always cry when it backfires.

Nigerian men only win bread, they don't know how to win any other thing- even the hearts and sympathy of their women. Always thinking everything is manee, manee, manee.

very myopic statements,I give up on u gals claiming feminism in here.my prayer is that God should guide my path,lest encounter women with this mentality...I believe we still have good women out there ,meeting such might be difficult,but the effort is worth it..Good luck with ur dream man ,perhaps u want a sissy that u can control and disrespect,men with low self-esteem..