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I Need Help!!! by Nobody: 3:23pm On Jan 21, 2020 |
Help me! Hello nairalanders,call me rizzla for privacy's sake. I am a Nigerian male,20 years of age, intelligent, beautiful-minded and I'm dying! I've always been the weird kid,the black sheep,the different one,I've always not know how to talk to people,how to socialize,how to make friends ever since I was younger I have always unconsciously isolated myself I don't know why but I always did. When I got quite older I started cutting people off my life, people I love, people that loved me... everyone,with every passing day I was more alone than the last day. The final straw that broke the camel's back was the time I was given admission to study Mechanical engineering in a Nigerian University. I finished my clearance and school resumed,only that I didn't resume with it,I had no friends,and no way to make one,I always felt awkward...weird! On my first day attending lectures,I got to the hall and the number of people who I saw left me stunned,it was as if every single person in the hall was connected to my energy and kept sapping it away,with every passing moment I felt weak. WEAK!!! I convinced myself it was stress and all that stuffs but with every visit to the halls,every visit to my course advisers office,every visit outside of my lodge I felt my energy level drop,I felt weak,useless,worse than dead! Sometimes I wouldn't step outside my lodge for weeks upon weeks because I was afraid,ashamed, humiliated, embarrassed by what I don't know!!! It was so bad that even merely thinking of "people" would trigger my panic attacks. This kept happening until after the first semester exams which I did very very badly! Second semester came and I couldn't even register a single course,every single day,I would curl up in my bed and feel the life force get drawn out of me,every single day I would curl up in pains wondering why God that so much loves the world would see it befitting to create one of his precious humans like this...to be so afraid of commitment,so afraid of other humans! And the funny part was that nobody knew what I really felt,I always plastered a smile across my face every single time I was around someone (mostly because I hate sharing my problems and because I really value company) Without necessarily saying, y'all should know second semester bleeped me up!! I started this year with a resolution,that I would put an end to the Bleep ups of last year. But the moment I got back to school,the depression resumed!! Pains,anger, sadness,more pains, anxiety,more anxiety,pains,more sadness... Yesterday,I tried going to a class,I got outside the class and the bare noise I observed from where I was stunned me,I couldn't go on,so I sat under a tree and blasted some music,I just couldn't literally move!!!! My family put a lot of hope and trust in me,but then they do not see their son for the broken young man that he is,they do not see the tears behind the smile,they do not see the pains in every word... I'm dying!! I need help!! This is a distress call!!!!!!!!!! SOCIAL ANXIETY!!! DEPRESSION!!! PANIC DISORDER!!! 2 Likes |
Re: I Need Help!!! by MrBrownJay1(m): 3:31pm On Jan 21, 2020 |
go talk to a specialist OR see your nearest drug dealers for some strong weed... in no time, you wont give a fukc about what others think. |
Re: I Need Help!!! by Nobody: 3:38pm On Jan 21, 2020 |
MrBrownJay1: Weed doesn't help,yes it does take away the pain, embarrassment and all that but it still doesn't let me go to places without feeling bad. |
Re: I Need Help!!! by tidalstorm(m): 3:38pm On Jan 21, 2020 |
You are a strong introvert plus you have social anxiety. You need to find a very extroverted friend. He will always do the talking while you can do the listening. You need to follow him around and get comfortable with people. Extroverts love talking so you won't need to add much. Do this till you understand social dynamics. We all need other people to survive |
Re: I Need Help!!! by MrBrownJay1(m): 3:39pm On Jan 21, 2020 |
psyrizzla: make friends FIRST, everything will fall in place afterwards.... |
Re: I Need Help!!! by Nobody: 3:49pm On Jan 21, 2020 |
tidalstorm: This is a good advice but sir,the major issue is that I am afraid,like literally in terror of other humans. Walking up to someone for a friendship is way beyond my physical ability,far far beyond what I can do. |
Re: I Need Help!!! by Nobody: 3:49pm On Jan 21, 2020 |
MrBrownJay1:Person wey dey fear human beings,how he wan make friends?? |
Re: I Need Help!!! by MrBrownJay1(m): 3:54pm On Jan 21, 2020 |
psyrizzla: you are creating problems in your life where there is none...AGAIN, go smoke weed, when the embarrassment/fear of people is gone, go MEET PEOPLE.... |
Re: I Need Help!!! by Nobody: 3:56pm On Jan 21, 2020 |
MrBrownJay1:Ok Sir,thanks for the advice. |
Re: I Need Help!!! by MrBrownJay1(m): 4:00pm On Jan 21, 2020 |
psyrizzla: seems you are seeking for online sympathy, rather than a solution to your issue. |
Re: I Need Help!!! by Israellionel: 4:01pm On Jan 21, 2020 |
Bro, You Ain't Alone. I Suffer From This Too. The Only Difference Is That I Write Tests And Exams And Register Courses As At When Due. Sometimes I Dress Up And When I Think Of Myself Meeting And Interacting With People In School, I Become Extra Scared. Tried Everything Possible, But Each Time, I Relapse Into My Former State. Anytime I Want To Go Out, I Always Try To Convince Myself That I Am Mentally Prepared. Going To The Nearby Grocery Shop Takes Hours Of Deliberation, And Most Times, I End Up Not Going. My Colleagues Think I'm Unserious, But No One Knows The Truth That Lies Underneath About Me. It's Hard, Trust Me. I Need Help Also, But When You Manage To Open Up To People, They Laugh At You, And You Feel Embarrassed. Don't Give Up Tho! There's Always Light At The End Of The Tunnel. One Love Bro. Cheers. 1 Like |
Re: I Need Help!!! by Israellionel: 4:05pm On Jan 21, 2020 |
MrBrownJay1: I Don't Think He's Seeking To Garner Online Sympathy. Peeps We've Opened Up To Offline, Instead Of Helping, Mock Us. Seeing This Thread And What The OP Is Going Through Makes Me Feel Not Alone, Because I Actually Thought I Was Weird. You'd Be Surprised As To How Many People Face This, But Find It Difficult To Speak Up. And Knowing That Nairaland Is A Faceless Forum, We Can Lay Down Our Problems Without Fear Or Shame. Have A Nice Day Sir! Jah Bless! 1 Like |
Re: I Need Help!!! by tidalstorm(m): 4:06pm On Jan 21, 2020 |
psyrizzla: Guy just learn how to make small talk, As long as you go out everyday, you meet people. In markets, school, church/mosque, football centres etc. Watch a lot of lame comedies and read alot too. Some friendships just happen. As you no dey go class you suppose get paddy wey go dey copy lecture notes wey you fit snap or photocopy. |
Re: I Need Help!!! by Nobody: 4:08pm On Jan 21, 2020 |
MrBrownJay1: This was Soo not useful,but in the spirit of me chasing a peaceful life I'll ignore this...thanks alot |
Re: I Need Help!!! by Nobody: 4:09pm On Jan 21, 2020 |
tidalstorm: Thanks alot bro� 1 Like |
Re: I Need Help!!! by Nobody: 4:10pm On Jan 21, 2020 |
Israellionel: God bless you for this,I was wondering why I would share my whole life online and someone would say it's for sympathy... online sympathy...who sympathy help I need healing |
Re: I Need Help!!! by Nobody: 4:12pm On Jan 21, 2020 |
Israellionel: Israellionel: this is too much,thanks alot for sharing at least I'll keep in mind that we plenty for this table,thanks alot bro |
Re: I Need Help!!! by Israellionel: 4:13pm On Jan 21, 2020 |
psyrizzla: Can We Talk On WhatsApp? If Yes, DM Me Your Number Bro. |
Re: I Need Help!!! by MrBrownJay1(m): 4:16pm On Jan 21, 2020 |
Israellionel: now 1st and foremost, lets make something very clear.... there IS something wrong with you, and just because others are doing the same, does NOT make it RIGHT sadly, the "fear" and "shame" is the whole problem here and unless you look for sound ways to solve the problem, ONLINE SYMPATHY is the only thing you will get, and certainly not a way out (in the real world). now yes, online sympathy feels nice for a moment, but the minute that person wakes up, then they are right back to where they were (in real life). IMHO, i believe that online sympathy is VERY DANGEROUS because it puts you in a false sense of righteousness or that everything is "okay" when it aint.... and in the contrary will make it more difficult for such person to get a solution to get out of such negative mindset. 1 Like |
Re: I Need Help!!! by Nobody: 4:16pm On Jan 21, 2020 |
Israellionel: check your email |
Re: I Need Help!!! by WaywardSon(m): 4:16pm On Jan 21, 2020 |
psyrizzla: Hey bro. You can beat this. WhatsApp me. My number is on my profile |
Re: I Need Help!!! by Oblongata: 4:19pm On Jan 21, 2020 |
My candid advice aburo Have ever been molested/abused while growing up? Did you go through any trauma that might affect your relationship with humans? Have you had bad memories about events caused by crowd ? Have you ever been embarrassed in front of a crowd before and the memories still linger? Might I suggest (from your write up) that you have dissociative identity disorder. The cure? You need to be more social... Join a church (if you are a xtian) and be a worker. Or join school group. And try to get a girl you would fall in love with. Cheers |
Re: I Need Help!!! by Nobody: 4:26pm On Jan 21, 2020 |
Oblongata: The bulk of my childhood memories are vague like my mind purposely cached them. Yes you may suggest DID, I'm open to any suggestions. And about the social stuffs,I've been trying Sha but I've relapsed most of the times...and about the girl stuffs (this one made me laugh) I actually want to work on myself through and through before giving love a chance,I don't want to go into a relationship as a bleeped up person. Thanks for the advice tho |
Re: I Need Help!!! by Nobody: 4:28pm On Jan 21, 2020 |
MrBrownJay1: thank you for your candid opinion, remain blessed and save your sympathy for when it's actually required Sir. I seek help,I seek healing,I seek something far away from sympathy. stay blessed |
Re: I Need Help!!! by MrBrownJay1(m): 4:29pm On Jan 21, 2020 |
psyrizzla: for anybody who actually still believe the NONSENSE post of the OP, as anything other than seeking for online attention/sympathy....i suggest you read the below he posted a few weeks ago (he forgot about all the rubbish he posted i guess): psyrizzla: or better yet psyrizzla: or worse, when he tells people about... psyrizzla: psyrizzla: psyrizzla: [img]https://media./images/a92b06ba809f11bfc51a9fa8f94e98c1/tenor.gif[/img] |
Re: I Need Help!!! by Nobody: 4:37pm On Jan 21, 2020 |
MrBrownJay1: forget keh!! MrBrownJay1: forget keh!! it's actually beautiful how far you went to make a point that I don't need help, anyways,it's your keyboard right in front of you sir... people believe, people are helping and one day I'll come back to this thread to testify. Have a lovely evening |
Re: I Need Help!!! by MrBrownJay1(m): 4:43pm On Jan 21, 2020 |
psyrizzla: come and testify NOW, you online fancy storyteller!!! here you were telling ONE story after the next...here you were telling other people that they needed the "red pill"... here you were insulting women about sexual acts... and now you came opening this deluded thread claiming to be some dude suffering from anxiety, depression and panic disorder... all for BS ONLINE SYMPATHY . i suggest you be quiet and accept that you have been busted for the ONLINE DELUDED TROLL that you are 1 Like |
Re: I Need Help!!! by Nobody: 4:49pm On Jan 21, 2020 |
MrBrownJay1: Ok sir, anything else?? |
Re: I Need Help!!! by hashtagged(m): 8:49pm On Jan 21, 2020 |
psyrizzla: Hmm I was like that too, in my hundred level, the only people I could talk to were my mum and little bro. When I get to class I can't even look at people in the eye, I always sat at the back to avoid contact with other people. I hated people touching me even handshakes and I would get goosebumps I even started wearing hand gloves at some point. 2yrs after Am still like that now. It's not a disease it's a lifestyle. It would save you from the immoral practices in this world. Plus I found broken people amusing. |
Re: I Need Help!!! by Nobody: 11:23pm On Jan 21, 2020 |
hashtagged: Yes,our lifestyle has it's highs but personally... rationally there's nothing really great about it. |
Re: I Need Help!!! by Nobody: 12:09am On Jan 22, 2020 |
psyrizzla: The best way to stop this is to avoid triggers. If you feel you can't do certain things like meeting and making new friends, don't try to force it cos if you fail at it, you'll be more depressed and begin to judge yourself thinking something is wrong with you. Just see it as it not your thing and try to be at peace with yourself pending when you can naturally do these things without fear. There's time for everything. always tell yourself that. Also if schooling tends to trigger that feeling, as silly as this may sound, ditch it for now! Yes. You heard me. Your sanity matters. There must be that' one thing you're very good at and do with ease and some peace that you can become successful in. Try and discover it. When you do, by the time you're done achieving it, youll feel a bit fulfilled and that sense of fulfillment is what will now drive you into wanting to try other things like now going back to school because by now youll feeing of an achiever which will give you the boldness you need to do other things. Its all about discovering your real self and what you can do or really want to do. Start with those before venturing into what other people want you to do. Above all, consult a psychiatrist. |
Re: I Need Help!!! by Nobody: 10:55am On Jan 22, 2020 |
Jewessgratitude: thank you, thank you,thank you...alot,this is word! |
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