cr7lomo:


Better move on and don't look bk .. hardly will u c an Igbo man marry outside their region, talk less of edo ... Listen to people like blu03 and regret it all ur life ... Blu03 will not b there when u start to face it... Everything is not love ooo... If something happens to him if u marry him, that's when u will know u hv ruined ur life

Thank you

WackyJ1:



I love what Tallesty1 says and I agree with his suggestions.

You also said certain things about his character which I believe is contributing to this.

You said he has complexes. This might be inferiority complex or low self-esteem.
You said he was the least performing child and the last born, which might have been because of or resulted in the low self-esteem. Even if he doesn't have it now, he definitely struggled with it in the past.

When you have that description of the least performing child, it means you were constantly compared to other children your elder siblings or even others outside. That affects a child's esteem badly and he won't be able to speak up for himself. That is what is going on with him now.

He is most likely also codependent.

He probably spent two decades of his life trying to win his parents approval and now he has a conflict that won't make him go against their wishes and gain their biggest disappointment, what do you think he would do? It would be very hard for him to contemplate any form of action that would involve putting his foot down.

Please understand that even the contemplation of their disappointment will cause him to sweat under AC and have anxiety attacks. This is something that he has been facing long, long before he met you.

So do what Tallesty suggested, talk to him.

Try whatever you can to improve the relationship you have with his parents.

If all fails, then move on

Thank you, thank you

Oko buruku se ni sugbon Ana buruku ni o se ni..

Get a Yoruba person to translate that for you.

Ire o!!

DM let hook up

I am Igbo too and I hate it when people judge others with tribal inclinations so his parents are terrible with their judgement.
However, your guy isn't mature enough cos the much I know many Igbo guys marry outside the tribes as most Igbo parents just advise in marriage and their sons keep it to that

cRobo:
I don't know how to read

Lol lazy bones.... She wrote in clear terms....



@OP you did the right thing by breaking up with him...

Lamanii22:



Lol lazy bones.... She wrote in clear terms....



@OP you did the right thing by breaking up with him...

Oya come give me home lesson

Lamanii22:



Lol lazy bones.... She wrote in clear terms....



@OP you did the right thing by breaking up with him...

Okay, thanks for your input

Pierced:
Some guys sha......why was he pretending all these while that everything was ok.....meanwhile he knows he's having doubts about u.

Thank ur God....u dodged a bullet.

I will pîerce your nose now if you don't kip kwayet!!

What can i say... Tribal sentiments aside, if he truly loves you as he claims, he should fight for your love, it's like he is not sure about the whole thing

Are you willing to fight for your love?
Do you think you can persevere and wait?
If you are in hurry to marry, then just move on, if not, then tarry...
Tallesty1 captured what seems like the situaton with your guy.

If he is willing to fight for you, let him get all his elder siblings and their spouses to support him to marry you.
This way, his parents will simply be overwhelmed and allow him marry you. His elder siblings and perhaps uncles and aunts can save him the heartache his parents are subjecting him to.
I understand your pains. Stay strong and don't give up yet. True love is worth fighting for. I am passing through same experience presently.
Travelling out of Nigeria may be an option too only if he has the support of his elder siblings.

Same people will start claiming whites are racist

That's how my people keep telling me not to even think of marrying from another tribe. Imagine

To be frank with you, my dear start looking for another guy. I'm Igbo so I know what I'm talking about. As long as both parents are alive and your guy is a typical omo igbo, not Lagos Igbos, forget it. You'll only end up hurting yourself. You'll just be there and the next thing see pregnant iyawo in the building. Dont say I didn't warn you.

Call it tribalism or bygote, Igbo's (some other tribes) don't usually marry outside their tribe. Even we the ladies, from a very tender age are advised not to marry outside our tribe and they give very cogent reasons to back this up and this these things have a way of conditioning our minds to how we now perceive people from other tribes. And we also get to see some of the reasons they told us not to intermarry with them. My late grand father once gathered all his grand children and warned us not to ever marry from the Hausa tribes with very valid reasons. Since then even Hausa don't even cross my way cos I dont notice them.
I find it difficult dating anyone apart from Igbo's now. The only non igbo ive ever dated was mixed ( igbo/Akwaibom). So dear, you shouldn't waste your time. Its clearly written on the wall that you're not wanted in that family. Kindly take a bow.

My ten cent.

CokeBar:



Hmmm... it is well.
Hope you've recovered?

Yes, I have.

AshiraWealthy:
To be frank with you, my dear start looking for another guy. I'm Igbo so I know what I'm talking about. As long as both parents are alive and your guy is a typical omo igbo, not Lagos Igbos, forget it. You'll only end up hurting yourself. You'll just be there and the next thing see pregnant iyawo in the building. Dont say I didn't warn you.

Call it tribalism or bygote, Igbo's (some other tribes) don't usually marry outside their tribe. Even we the ladies, from a very tender age are advised not to marry outside our tribe and they give very cogent reasons to back this up and this these things have a way of conditioning our minds to how we now perceive people from other tribes. And we also get to see some of the reasons they told us not to intermarry with them. My late grand father once gathered all his grand children and warned us not to ever marry from the Hausa tribes with very valid reasons. Since then even Hausa don't even cross my way cos I dont notice them.
I find it difficult dating anyone apart from Igbo's now. The only non igbo ive ever dated was mixed ( igbo/Akwaibom). So dear, you shouldn't waste your time. Its clearly written on the wall that you're not wanted in that family. Kindly take a bow.

My ten cent.

Thank you, I appreciate this

physise:
Yes, I have.

Okay, great.

With time, I'll also heal.

Not sexually active hmm very funny...

CokeBar:

We are not sexually active... so that isn't the case.
Thank you for your response

2 years wasted

My dear sister, i guess your man is not ready to make his stand on you. Hes still being controlled by his family. Please politely excuse yourself from intending problems from his families. Save the headache now.

cr7lomo:


Better move on and don't look bk .. hardly will u c an Igbo man marry outside their region, talk less of edo ... Listen to people like blu03 and regret it all ur life ... Blu03 will not b there when u start to face it... Everything is not love ooo... If something happens to him if u marry him, that's when u will know u hv ruined ur life

what advice?? I just complained about tribalism

WackyJ1:


See your head

E B like your Anambra head na

NNAMDIII:
2 years wasted

It is well

anonymuz:
My dear sister, i guess your man is not ready to make his stand on you. Hes still being controlled by his family. Please politely excuse yourself from intending problems from his families. Save the headache now.

Okay, thank you for your input.

He's probably from anambra state (no offence to anambra people) They're very picky about marrying outside their state.
I used to hear that thing I didn't believe till I fell in love with a guy from that state.
Long story short, I inferred from what he had earlier told me about a past relationship that I do not stand a chance with his people. I'm ibo but from Imo.
I always advice never to agree to a marriage with a man whose family doesn't like you. Take heart.

vincentjk:
That's how my people keep telling me not to even think of marrying from another tribe. Imagine

I always say it tribalism is worse than racism. Anytime, any day. We're all blacks yet we can't stand each other..

I SENT YOU A MESSAGE KINDLY RESPOND
THANK YOU

CokeBar:


Thank you

Chi59:

I always say it tribalism is worse than racism. Anytime, any day. We're all blacks yet we can't stand each other..

I tire o

My dear , Benin and Igbo people no dey too tally o, if it's a Yoruba guy no problem and again with the kind of response he gave, he is on the fence" . Don't wait for him to climb down that fence, try and have a proper conversation with him.
To get married in a family u are not liked is a very big problem, so be wise.

Chi59:
He's probably from anambra state (no offence to anambra people) They're very picky about marrying outside their state.
I used to hear that thing I didn't believe till I fell in love with a guy from that state.
Long story short, I inferred from what he had earlier told me about a past relationship that I do not stand a chance with his people. I'm ibo but from Imo.
I always advice never to agree to a marriage with a man whose family doesn't like you. Take heart.

He's actually from Imo

Thank you for your advise

EndtimeJudge:
I SENT YOU A MESSAGE KINDLY RESPOND
THANK YOU

I'ld appreciate if we could have the discussion here, thank you.

doris4u:
My dear , Benin and Igbo people no dey too tally o, if it's a Yoruba guy no problem and again with the kind of response he gave, he is on the fence" . Don't wait for him to climb down that fence, try and have a proper conversation with him.
To get married in a family u are not liked is a very big problem, so be wise.

Thank you, thank you