ubunja:
my own sister lived with a man for years, got a kid by him and got dumped. But she was smart enough to trace some old exBF who never really got over her. As we speak the lame guy has paid Bride price. I commend her for being smart. But then again should my young brother bring home a single mother I'll slap him so hard he would forget his name.

Jeweltz:


This is the gist

My friend's mum is a single mother who was lucky to remarry and hook a business man, rich enough to send her on expensive vacation abroad and give my friend q better life, up till Masters degree. Everytimey friend tells me she misses her biological father, even till the point she started giving him money which he spend on women and beer ( this is the level of his irresponsible). My friend's elder brother brought was dating q single moms, but their mother objected him vowing to place curse on him if he decided to go forth with his plan of Marrying his single girlfriend.

[/b]My question was if marrying q single mom is a thing of pride, why did the mother objected having married as a single mom herself[b]

ubunja:
if people were not numbers who were predictable how will psychologists even be able to do their job? FYI Psychologists follow patterns and methods written down to follow. It's all predicted. Like maths.

1+1=2.
Traumatic childhood is the maths. All rapists, murderers etc have a form of childhood trauma. That's the maths I'm telling you. It's all predictable. Its all numbers.

Jeweltz:


I like the fact that you're intelligent. I'm a woman and I understand the pain single moms go through whole raising their kids. That's why most single moms hook themselves with a man, at least rich enough, to help he raise the kid. I will not comment and side on terms that only complies and agree to women's manipulative whims. That's why I can't allow my brother to marry nor date q single moms. These single moms operate on manipulation and even the smartest man will find difficult to decode.

Lilbest3:
me, I personally hate noise, if I have a son today and he's shouting all over the place, I can scold him to go outside and play but if the child is not mine, the parents will think I'm being resentful and wicked to the child because he is not mine that's why I always scold him.

Lastly, he has no business taking care of a child that was formed with the sperm of another man.

WilliamsTheGrea:
Hello everyone, my name is Williams, I'm a young guy of 26 years old currently engaged to a very pretty young lady who is 24 years old

I do business online and earn good income before I decided to find a lady and settle down with and luckily I found a good one who is decent and don't flirt around or do social media's like whatsapp or Facebook. Hardly receives calls, not friendly with males lol (I managed to woo her through a church member)

We have been 1 year into the relationship now and we are to get married next month but guys the problem I am having now is that she has a child for another man which is her ex she was with when she was young she gave birth at age 20, we dated for about 7 months before she told me this.

Ever since then I haven't really been myself, the child is a male child who lives with her mother but recently the mother called her to come carry the child as she can no longer look after him due to him being a very stubborn boy, the child is 4 years old.

Now she has gone to bring the child to our home, a two bedroom apartment, I'm a kind of guy who loves peaceful environment with no single drop of noise, now ever since the child came in about a week now, I have not had peace, we have quarreled several times because of the child, I'm not really comfortable with the child because I can't love another man's child as my own

My girlfriend is yet to give me a child of my own, the child runs around and doesn't listen except when beaten and each time I beat the boy up when he does wrong my girlfriend looks at me with hatred like I'm maltreating the boy because I'm not the father.

Please guys help me I don't know what to do but I can't cope with the child, I remember paying the child school fees about 3 times since we are together because the child's father isn't doing anything at all.

Now today is the child's birthday and she is asking me for money to get him cake and take him out.


My people of nairaland I cannot accept another man's child no matter what I love the mother but not the child the connection is just now there because the boy isn't of my character I'm a calm man, very calm but the boy is very radical and stubborn children irritate me so much.

I don't know what to do.

Each time this child topic comes up between I and my girlfriend she becomes bitter.

She says she will never take the child to the father or the family of the father that she must raise the child herself.

I don't think I can help train anothrr man child whom in the end will go and find his father after he is all grown.

Please I need advice, she says over her death body will she return the child to the father

I'm not comfortable in my own home.

A lot of things running through my mind like to break up with her for peace to reign

Or rent another apartment for her and the boy to go live in.

Please I need matured advice

WilliamsTheGrea:
Hello everyone, my name is Williams, I'm a young guy of 26 years old currently engaged to a very pretty young lady who is 24 years old

I do business online and earn good income before I decided to find a lady and settle down with and luckily I found a good one who is decent and don't flirt around or do social media's like whatsapp or Facebook. Hardly receives calls, not friendly with males lol (I managed to woo her through a church member)

We have been 1 year into the relationship now and we are to get married next month but guys the problem I am having now is that she has a child for another man which is her ex she was with when she was young she gave birth at age 20, we dated for about 7 months before she told me this.

Ever since then I haven't really been myself, the child is a male child who lives with her mother but recently the mother called her to come carry the child as she can no longer look after him due to him being a very stubborn boy, the child is 4 years old.

Now she has gone to bring the child to our home, a two bedroom apartment, I'm a kind of guy who loves peaceful environment with no single drop of noise, now ever since the child came in about a week now, I have not had peace, we have quarreled several times because of the child, I'm not really comfortable with the child because I can't love another man's child as my own

My girlfriend is yet to give me a child of my own, the child runs around and doesn't listen except when beaten and each time I beat the boy up when he does wrong my girlfriend looks at me with hatred like I'm maltreating the boy because I'm not the father.

Please guys help me I don't know what to do but I can't cope with the child, I remember paying the child school fees about 3 times since we are together because the child's father isn't doing anything at all.

Now today is the child's birthday and she is asking me for money to get him cake and take him out.


My people of nairaland I cannot accept another man's child no matter what I love the mother but not the child the connection is just now there because the boy isn't of my character I'm a calm man, very calm but the boy is very radical and stubborn children irritate me so much.

I don't know what to do.

Each time this child topic comes up between I and my girlfriend she becomes bitter.

She says she will never take the child to the father or the family of the father that she must raise the child herself.

I don't think I can help train anothrr man child whom in the end will go and find his father after he is all grown.

Please I need advice, she says over her death body will she return the child to the father

I'm not comfortable in my own home.

A lot of things running through my mind like to break up with her for peace to reign

Or rent another apartment for her and the boy to go live in.

Please I need matured advice

Savagethe21st:
chai my big bro u are always right, i just need one favour from u.suggest some psychological books i can download to know peoples next move pls

Jeweltz:


This is the gist

My friend's mum is a single mother who was lucky to remarry and hook a business man, rich enough to send her on expensive vacation abroad and give my friend q better life, up till Masters degree. Everytimey friend tells me she misses her biological father, even till the point she started giving him money which he spend on women and beer ( this is the level of his irresponsible). My friend's elder brother brought was dating q single moms, but their mother objected him vowing to place curse on him if he decided to go forth with his plan of Marrying his single girlfriend.

My question was if marrying q single mom is a thing of pride, why did the mother objected having married as a single mom herself

isyourboy:


One thing I've greatly learn from you is your ability to maintain your stand even in the midst of trolls and negativity. How you are able to do this I don't know.80% of men today cowers at the sight of women's dissaproval of them and they just can't but do anything to make themselves accepted by the majority who seem to dislike them. But you're different. The truth is ' these women commenting on this thread are just hypocrite.

If the situation were reversed, can these women spend on their husband son by another woman?

Jeweltz:


You can use your resource sponsoring the son your husband had before he marry you? Or you can advise your brothers to do the same

Savagethe21st:
chai my big bro u are always right, i just need one favour from u.suggest some psychological books i can download to know peoples next move pls

Sexyolori:
her son is a part of her. if you're won't accept both of them then you'll need to let her be. you should be thankful she didn't hide it from you.

ubunja:
that would have to be Dale Carnige "How To Win Friends And Influence People". It's a very old book (from the 1930s?) but it's full of priceless insights into Human nature.

2buffagain:


Read the OP again. Did she really tho?
She hid this fact from him for almost a year of dating.

You've jumped in to comment about the story in your head you want to comment about...not the facts.

ABBkelvin:


Ubunja... it's been a while and you later held frame of this section to yourself

madeinnigeria:
Ok..but he decided to go along till marriage talk started...that's my point

ubunja:
kelvin!!! You good bossman? Truth is truth boss.

2buffagain:


You mean until a rowdy child that doesn't belong to him was brought into his house that he couldn't put in order because that's not his child and the mother won't let him?

You people should try and see some things from a man's perspective too.
Men are not just ATMs. He is dealing with a lot emotionally too...
The 7 month long deceit has been on his mind, combined with the new reality of that deceit when the child moves in, and the reality of being unable to take specific action on said child because the mother will remind him that is not his child (except when it comes to the finance, making him a maga).

If women expanded their mind and saw some things from the perspective of men sometimes, there will be fewer fights.

ubunja:
and to think you used to like me....

ubunja:
send me money and I'll tell you.

Akuruoulo:


CONFIRMED ALREADY.




KEEP ON THE TRUTHFUL LIFE

ubunja:
so no money for me?

ubunja:
so no money for me?

Akuruoulo:


but I realized the truth about ur gender myself, sooooi no money for you .

ubunja:
it's all good bro. Have a good evening

Akuruoulo:


same to you sis

Skepticus:


Humans are slimy piece of shît. I'm glad you know better by exposing the fool.