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My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us - Family (22) - Nairaland

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Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by Ivebeenbanned(f): 2:45pm On Mar 13, 2020
letskeeptalking:


You foot 70% of bills in your house and yet you allow your husband to dictate to you what to do with your own son.

Madam, I don't think you are a serious person.

Personally I will rather be single than be with a man who will stand between me and my children. Even if I have to live in poverty. But you are financially capable, you just want to answer 'Mrs' at the expense of your child.

After bouncing him off relatives for years, you are now using your husband as an excuse to run from your duty.

Shame!
Beautiful.

1 Like

Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by confido2017: 2:45pm On Mar 13, 2020
BOARDING SCHOOL is the best for him

1 Like

Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by Nobody: 2:46pm On Mar 13, 2020
Oyindidi:
R is missing in your monikergrin add R inbetween the 2 O. That's what you are grin
Your father, mother,brothers, sisters, grandparents, every body wet dey ur family are slowpokes

1 Like

Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by Ivebeenbanned(f): 2:47pm On Mar 13, 2020
Davash222:
Your siblings that are your relatives doesn't want the boy but you want your husband that is not your relative to accept the boy
You should learn to attend to your responsibilities and mistakes. Don't drag your mistakes to that innocent man. He has done more than enough for you.

Marrying a Nigerian girl with two children(not even one) is not what every man can do. That man deserves peace and respect from you.
You're a kid in a grown man's body. Therefore you're a disgrace to manhood. Your weakness, toxic masculinity, and hate for women will drag you to the grave. SARS should be looking for your type to kill. I'm sure nobody would be sad. Ewu.

4 Likes

Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by deavicky(m): 2:47pm On Mar 13, 2020
Vyvyanvyvy:

He is not in Nigeria
then tell him to come and carry him. Why are u trying to do it alone?

1 Like

Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by Ivebeenbanned(f): 2:48pm On Mar 13, 2020
James289:
Take him to the orphanage
Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by Richy4(m): 2:48pm On Mar 13, 2020
Blyzz:
crystal clear, hearing from a woman alone is dangerous. Some women are devil by themselves. On the first page of this thread, scroll down, the second to the last person who commented, you'd hear her own reasons of marrying again. If she takes care of 70% of her current home, what stop her for renting her own house? How can a woman with two kids don't know her former husband relatives or siblings. She doesn't also know the grandmother of her former husband? Even if his grandmother is dead, Facebook is available. Why can't her search for his former husband's siblings only. Yeye dey smell from her story, she doesn't want to tell us she had bad attitude that's why her previous husband's family didn't accept the kids

When I was growing up in Nigeria wayback, I used to hear about Abuja Marriage.. as I began to mature in my teens those days in Abuja , It started making perfect sense. Yes, a couple can stay in a relationship with kids without caring where or who their relatives where. I saw that in Abuja in the late '90s. I did not say someone told me.I saw it..

Though this might be extreme but OP has the right to divorce him on a bridge of contract. this is because he promised to accept her for who she was with her kids and all what not after marrying her, he refused to honour his agreement... I don't know if you are good with Law sha... You may agree or disagree with me but I stand by the side of truth.

Bro, Assuming that reverse was the case, and the man had 2 children and OP refused to have anything to do with them or even allow them to set foot in that house, Do u think all these young men dishing out advice would have spared the lady? I have stayed long on Nairaland to know that advise here are based on genda. Noone wants to call a spade a spade.

6 Likes

Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by elladara: 2:48pm On Mar 13, 2020
Belafonte:


This is really difficult to believe. Even his family refused to have anything to do with you with two children/grandchildren? Wonderful.

This could be very true especially when you are unfortunate to have child/children for family that care less and does not appreciate relationships . i have a daughter of 6 years, her father is at least 85 percent responsible, i mean he pays her bills most especially school bills and send monthly allowance and am financially okay to an extent as well, so with the grace of God my daughter gets what she needs. we are not married and we cant marry as he as moved on. none of his family asked of the child not for a day, i stopped calling and visiting them 3 years and some months ago when i realized i worth more than what am getting.

Madam i can understand what you can be going through, my advice is pls dont trade your son/children for anything. if you are financially okay, have a discussion with you husband that you want to enroll him to a boarding school and he would only be coming over for holiday. or get a room apartment and get a nanny for him while you go visiting.

3 Likes

Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by deavicky(m): 2:49pm On Mar 13, 2020
Ivebeenbanned:

You're a kid in a grown man's body. Therefore you're a disgrace to manhood. Your weakness, toxic masculinity, and hate for women will drag you to the grave. SARS should be looking for you type to kill. I'm sure nobody would be sad. Ewu.
the truth can pain some people!!! Why? Why can the boy stay with his father.

1 Like

Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by Oyindidi(f): 2:50pm On Mar 13, 2020
M00N:

Your father, mother,brothers, sisters, grandparents, every body wet dey ur family are slowpokes
gringringringrin I like your tears

1 Like

Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by Nobody: 2:50pm On Mar 13, 2020
Ivebeenbanned:

You're a kid in a grown man's body. Therefore you're a disgrace to manhood. Your weakness, toxic masculinity, and hate for women will drag you to the grave. SARS should be looking for you type to kill. I'm sure nobody would be sad. Ewu.

Have been eating bitter kola?

Have been drinking and bathing with bitter leaf water?

You are a bitter person

1 Like

Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by Ivebeenbanned(f): 2:51pm On Mar 13, 2020
deavicky:
the truth can pain some people!!! Why? Why can the boy stay with his father.
Wasn't talking to you. Didn't ask for your silly opinions, Nigerian man.

2 Likes

Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by Ivebeenbanned(f): 2:52pm On Mar 13, 2020
Oyindidi:
gringringringrin I like your tears
I like you a lot already grin
Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by Nobody: 2:52pm On Mar 13, 2020
Oyindidi:
gringringringrin I like your tears

I see you have tacha syndrome that is why you are so bitter

1 Like

Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by Ivebeenbanned(f): 2:52pm On Mar 13, 2020
M00N:


Have been eating bitter kola?

Have been drinking and bathing with bitter leaf water?

You are a bitter person
K.
Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by Nobody: 2:53pm On Mar 13, 2020
Belafonte:


If theft is passed down in your lineage and seen as normal, I would like you to understand that not everyone has such values.
I am sure your lineage as the holiest oponu
Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by Ivebeenbanned(f): 2:54pm On Mar 13, 2020
Vyvyanvyvy:

Thanks I will rather be alone with my children . I’m thinking of going there on Sunday to pick him up from my brother and I will let him do his worst. If he denied him access to the house then I’m ready to quit
Glad you decided on this. You deserve better.

1 Like

Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by Nobody: 2:57pm On Mar 13, 2020
Vyvyanvyvy:
He wants me to come and collect him.


Madam go & collect ur son 2 ease ur brother's burden..He has commited alot,I supossed..
Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by Vyvyanvyvy: 2:57pm On Mar 13, 2020
TabletMan:
You created this thread not to seek advice but to validate your actions because I knew you have already made plans for your son before opening this thread.
Some of these people advising you to divorce your husband are product of broken and warring homes.
That your son needs a fatherly figure in his life and just from your many comments I can only deduce that you're not capable of being both the man and woman in his life.
Go on with your plan but please don't quarrel or trouble your husband because he doesn't support it rather convince him with valid reasons why your son needs to be with you. He may not like the idea of your son living with you people but with time, he will get use to the boy. Make peace with your man because I can see taking 70% of the bills is raising up your pride and ego. You're healthy and alive and non of your relatives is capable of taking care of your only son what if something happens tomorrow? who is going to take care of your 3/4 children? .
I believe your husband is acting due to bad advise and influence of people, family members or friends that's why he is rejecting your son but accepted your daughter like his own, even after promising of taking care of both of them in the past.
Be wise in your dealings because you have made the first mistake, don't let pride and ego be your second mistake .
Make your husband to love your son and you will never regret it.
Yes you are right before I brought my problem here have already made up my mind to bring my son to the house this Sunday but I didn’t want to act fast so I decided to come here and seek opinions / advices from others too because is very important. My children are not my relative responsibility while I’m still alive it’s my duty to care and protect them myself nobody can take care of them better than me and if I die ( God forbid) I know my sister will never abandon my children the same way I will do for her kids if she is not around.

10 Likes

Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by Deepthoughts: 2:58pm On Mar 13, 2020
Vyvyanvyvy:

He will be 12 years in August , my daughter is 6 years, I have one daughter for my husband she is 2 years and I’m pregnant with another one. Their father is not in Nigeria and I don’t have his contact or his siblings. Yes I have a grocery shop I foot 70% bills in my house
If this is true then I'm sorry to say that it's likely your previous husband was a foreigner/expatriate whom you got Randy with n had kids without proper marriage perhaps out of lust,greed, eldera do or deception but whatever is the case, with your financial strength you should have waited for your kids to come of age before considering marriage again or you should have made their leaving with you a non negotiable condition for marriage,I understand the pains you feel about the pathetic condition of your children irrespective of whatever mistake of the past,try to take up the issue with your present husband in a calm n respectful manner if he refused to bulge then calmly but firmly ask him how he would feel if you abandoned him with his children and go back to your previous children?,then workout the maths from his reaction but please it's important that you have been of respectful n general good conduct to your present husband.

2 Likes

Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by crackkhaus: 2:58pm On Mar 13, 2020
armadeo:


Let me summarise this post.

Beg him to agree or tell him to Bleep off.

Exactly cool
Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by samworthyever: 2:59pm On Mar 13, 2020
If not for the situation of things ï would have advice her not to marry again. That is why its good to be independent. Pls take the Children to their father or family people. There is nothing u can do to convince your husband.

1 Like

Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by Vyvyanvyvy: 3:01pm On Mar 13, 2020
Deepthoughts:
Please how do you make all that money?,n why can't you take the children bact to their biological father?,how are you sure that your present husband wouldn't maltreat the boy?,these are some of the reasons why it's very important to think deeply n to consider different scenarios before acting in every situation less we move from frying pan to fire.
I have a grocery shop my late mother funded for me . He can’t maltreat him whyle I’m still there he can correct and punish him if he does wrong but never I will allow him to maltreat him.

8 Likes

Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by Nobody: 3:01pm On Mar 13, 2020
Richy4:


When I was growing up in Nigeria wayback, I used to hear about Abuja Marriage.. as I began to mature in my teens those days in Abuja , It started making perfect sense. Yes, a couple can stay in a relationship with kids without caring where or who their relatives where. I saw that in Abuja in the late '90s. I did not say someone told me.I saw it..

Though this might be extreme but OP has the right to divorce him on a bridge of contract. this is because he promised to accept her for who she was with her kids and all what not after marrying her, he refused to honour his agreement... I don't know if you are good with Law sha... You may agree or disagree with me but I stand by the side of truth.

Bro, Assuming that reverse was the case, and the man had 2 children and OP refused to have anything to do with them or even allow them to set foot in that house, Do u think all these young men dishing out advice would have spared the lady? I have stayed long on Nairaland to know that advise here are based on genda. Noone wants to call a spade a spade.
well you're right, all boils down to love. If the man love the woman so tenderly, he'll do his best to care for the kids. But if the reverse be the case, I'd also tell you from experience, I've seen men who took their kids to their mother or siblings, because the wife at home maltreat the man's child and takes care of her own children. I've seen men who had kids outside end up marrying a woman with a kids also.

From my view, I can tell you the man is going through phycological stress. Thinking of what to do. Having a daughter at home, then another unborn child on its way. So adding another two children in the house, I think he's worried of that. Mind you, most men would accept the woman at first base on the eye of attraction. Then after having sex with her, bearing children for him. It not likely to renew old promises, I hope you get me.

2 Likes

Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by Nobody: 3:03pm On Mar 13, 2020
Oyindidi:
Watin dey pain you this afternoon? She is doing well for herself, oya start crying
No longer "independent"? undecided. Confused being

2 Likes

Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by seangy4konji: 3:05pm On Mar 13, 2020
That girl commenting up and down has a big problem. She should be ignored. In real life might be a worthless piece of crap...

Masturbating all over the thread.

3 Likes

Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by Nobody: 3:06pm On Mar 13, 2020
Oyindidi:
gringringringrin I like your tears
this picture na charachiker pattern be this oh. This girl must be flying at night oh. See her display, so terrifying

1 Like

Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by lepasharon(f): 3:06pm On Mar 13, 2020
MadeMan01:


I am 42 years and have never had sex with a a virgin. I have had sex with over 200 women and have never met a virgin

Are you a virgin?

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