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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / How Do You Cope Alone With Husband In The US? (4494 Views)
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How Do You Cope Alone With Husband In The US? by shekhaz(f): 12:52am On Apr 04, 2020 |
I opened this thread to get views and advice from my fellow women who are in my shoes. I got married in 2012 and we are blessed with two lovely kids. My husband had always travel even before we got married. But last year he decided to stay back to work his way to getting green card. I have been trying to manage his absence by keeping busy with work and the kids. But covid 19 is making everything difficult now. Often times I have always cried myself to sleep at night. I never saw myself living in this situation but these past few weeks has been hell. Presently I have insomnia, I miss him so much I think I might break down soon. I don't know what to do anymore. He never takes me seriously when I cry to him. He believes I am not being emotionally strong since it will only be for a short while. I know I can't be alone in this. Please I need advise from women who have been in this situation. How did you cope? Are you guys together now? How did deal with the kids when they miss their daddy? Thank you for your input 1 Like |
Re: How Do You Cope Alone With Husband In The US? by Betakeshi: 12:58am On Apr 04, 2020 |
You'll be alright. 12 Likes |
Re: How Do You Cope Alone With Husband In The US? by Ladylite: 1:09am On Apr 04, 2020 |
shekhaz: Am in the UK and I know how you feel. Sadly you can't seem to see the bitter truth. A man who really cares will be there. True love always finds a way. 6 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: How Do You Cope Alone With Husband In The US? by Boston001(m): 1:47am On Apr 04, 2020 |
I can relate to you very well. My family are in Nigeria and I am an American due to situation beyond my control o have not been able to travel home recently. For one thing video chat and constant communication makes it easy. The digital romance is fun and they are well provided for too. Talk to your husband to make it fun 3 Likes |
Re: How Do You Cope Alone With Husband In The US? by GboyegaD(m): 2:13am On Apr 04, 2020 |
Just keep communicating as much as you can. One of the challenges though is you can't tell how quick the paper process will take. It might take years and it might be months. Just keep yourself busy and hope hos paperwork comes through quick enough. 2 Likes 1 Share |
Re: How Do You Cope Alone With Husband In The US? by dawnomike(m): 2:17am On Apr 04, 2020 |
You are really in a big pair of shoes and so many women are going through the same as you are... You are not alone. Speak with friends/family to sometimes come around and help with the kids or get a house help to help out with the workload. The Lord is your strength 2 Likes |
Re: How Do You Cope Alone With Husband In The US? by APOPTOSIS: 2:46am On Apr 04, 2020 |
My Uncle experienced similar issue. Not easy at all. And you said he is yet to get his green card..? That's more years oo. Do more VIDEO CALLS. U need DaTa to actualize that. He won't come in any time soon as long as he is fighting for his Green Card in the USUS, which will in return benefit you and your kids. |
Re: How Do You Cope Alone With Husband In The US? by Nobody: 2:49am On Apr 04, 2020 |
I'm sorry about your situation. Try to make him understand your plight |
Re: How Do You Cope Alone With Husband In The US? by Nobody: 7:11am On Apr 04, 2020 |
If I tell you the probable truth about the situation you guys are in now, you can't handle it from the way you sound so I advise you make more of video calls and keep hoping for the best. 4 Likes |
Re: How Do You Cope Alone With Husband In The US? by crackkhaus: 8:01am On Apr 04, 2020 |
At least you're not complaining of being sex-starved and fighting the temptations to cheat. This is usually the issue with people in long distance marriages. You will be fine. 15 Likes |
Re: How Do You Cope Alone With Husband In The US? by Depriest2020: 8:51am On Apr 04, 2020 |
I don't know if it's sex you miss most about him? If it is, then I advise you be collecting from your ex till he comes back. But don't forget to apologise to him. 1 Like |
Re: How Do You Cope Alone With Husband In The US? by Acidosis(m): 8:58am On Apr 04, 2020 |
Do regular video calls. You'll be fine 1 Like |
Re: How Do You Cope Alone With Husband In The US? by AmbitiousDrama7: 9:28am On Apr 04, 2020 |
I can make you feel alright all you need is..... |
Re: How Do You Cope Alone With Husband In The US? by bukatyne(f): 9:53am On Apr 04, 2020 |
shekhaz: What changed this COVID-19? How do you behave when he is around that he does not really believe you miss him? |
Re: How Do You Cope Alone With Husband In The US? by bukatyne(f): 9:53am On Apr 04, 2020 |
Depriest2020: 1 Like |
Re: How Do You Cope Alone With Husband In The US? by freecocoahubby(m): 9:57am On Apr 04, 2020 |
Ladylite: Not when borders are now closed! Abi what is this one saying 9 Likes |
Re: How Do You Cope Alone With Husband In The US? by shekhaz(f): 10:41am On Apr 04, 2020 |
GboyegaD: Thank you, we do lots of video chat everyday though. But him not being around is the challenge. The kids always want to see him |
Re: How Do You Cope Alone With Husband In The US? by shekhaz(f): 10:42am On Apr 04, 2020 |
Depriest2020:Really How can you say this? Please I only asked for input from women in my shoes. If you've got nothing good to say, better you don't comment 13 Likes |
Re: How Do You Cope Alone With Husband In The US? by thorpido(m): 10:43am On Apr 04, 2020 |
Constant communication will help you.Do video calls regularly with him. |
Re: How Do You Cope Alone With Husband In The US? by shekhaz(f): 10:45am On Apr 04, 2020 |
Boston001:Thank you, we do video chat. It really helps but the reality of everything just set in now that we are all alone at home. When I go to work, I deal with the loneliness at night. But now it's becoming unbearable. We usually do stuffs together when we are both home. Doing everything by myself now |
Re: How Do You Cope Alone With Husband In The US? by shekhaz(f): 10:49am On Apr 04, 2020 |
dawnomike:You know women around me believe I am lucky. That after all no man to cook for every time. And he will be sending us money regularly to cater for our needs. See why I came here for different views. I am an emotional person I guess that's why I am like this. The house chores is not even a bother, I just miss having him around. Thank you for your kind words 6 Likes |
Re: How Do You Cope Alone With Husband In The US? by shekhaz(f): 10:52am On Apr 04, 2020 |
bukatyne:I didn't say he doesn't believe I miss him. The lock down with nothing to do aside take care of the kids makes me miss his companionship. 1 Like |
Re: How Do You Cope Alone With Husband In The US? by shekhaz(f): 10:58am On Apr 04, 2020 |
AmbitiousDrama7:Don't send me any private message pls. Post your advice here or keep it to yourself. Thank you 15 Likes |
Re: How Do You Cope Alone With Husband In The US? by bukatyne(f): 11:19am On Apr 04, 2020 |
shekhaz: You said he doesn't take you seriously. I believe you meant he is teasing you. Sorry about the loneliness, there not much you can do than video calls others have suggested. If you also go through activities together, it would help. For instance, if you do the kids' assignment together, initiate a call or he does and banter through the assignments together. Please stay strong. 4 Likes |
Re: How Do You Cope Alone With Husband In The US? by bukatyne(f): 11:21am On Apr 04, 2020 |
Ladylite: Really? How would her husband be there? 2 Likes |
Re: How Do You Cope Alone With Husband In The US? by GboyegaD(m): 11:54am On Apr 04, 2020 |
shekhaz: Get them to video chat with him. For the now, just try to be strong for the family. It is challenging however, I do not know how best to advise beyond telling you to stay strong. I pray for grace for you. 1 Like |
Re: How Do You Cope Alone With Husband In The US? by otipoju(m): 12:57pm On Apr 04, 2020 |
It's a long road ahead. I can't say all I know. To avoid this kind of situation is why I chose not to marry until I traveled. I can't be having to call one woman and children every day and not being able to go see them. When I want to. Ask him about Advance parole though. But most times you dont want to leave until you get the green card. 1 Like |
Re: How Do You Cope Alone With Husband In The US? by emmaodet: 1:21pm On Apr 04, 2020 |
Are you a lawyer ? Based in sagamu? Because from what you wrote up there, it seems you are someone i know. |
Re: How Do You Cope Alone With Husband In The US? by missimelda01(f): 2:03pm On Apr 04, 2020 |
Op you're trying, I think you should talk to him about it, since there's a lockdown he should be able to spend more time with you and the kids. I can't cope in such relationships honestly. 2 Likes |
Re: How Do You Cope Alone With Husband In The US? by AmbitiousDrama7: 3:03pm On Apr 04, 2020 |
shekhaz: Oh well but think about it you deserve better, your children needs a Dad not just a father |
Re: How Do You Cope Alone With Husband In The US? by belcom10(m): 10:05pm On Apr 04, 2020 |
May God see you through, stay strong. |
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