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Her Mother Said She Can't Marry An Ebonyi Man - Romance - Nairaland

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Her Mother Said She Can't Marry An Ebonyi Man by Giwoni: 2:01pm On Apr 19, 2020
My Love Experience

Good day NLanders

I'm a medical student, and gf ( not sure what to call her now) is in MLS. We are both in same level (500l).

It all started in 2015, when we gained admission into the University. We began to read together and subsequently I started teaching her. Later on, she made me to read and susummarize her course topics (which I did for up to her 300 level) for her as she usually found it difficult to read with textbooks and understand the contents.

Months before my 2nd MBBS examinations, I began to notice changes in her attitude and behaviour towards me, up to the point that she told me that if I did not pass that examinations that, she will forget about me. But as God may have it, I passed successfully.

Financially, it started right in year one as I celebrated her and her mummy's Christmas from my own pocket. It got to a point that I usually give her her money almost every day (for up to 5yrs) Whenever, I'm traveling in any of our vacations, I usually give money for upkeep until I'm back.

In 300l, I bought her gift worth almost 30k and also celebrated her birthday which she demanded I get her 'point and kill cat fish' that cost 9k.

I usually pay for her textbooks and seminar work as we are all in medical school, I really do a lot for her, as she always told me she would never leave me right from yr 1 to 500l after which she started telling me, their people from Anambra will not let her marry people from Ebonyi State.

She's has known this for all her life, but decided to bring it up just now, when I'm beginning my marriage plans with her, She's started giving me unnecessary excuses in one form or the other.

In 400L, my elder brother told me that I should leave my medical school here to go and study the same medicine abroad. Because of her, I told him that I want to finish my school here since I am already in 400 level. That after my MBBS degree, I can then go abroad for my Masters degree...

This January, my elder brother told me that since I would be graduating in 2022 (which supposed to be 2021 but due to strike before the 2019 election) which is two years time, that I should be planning to get married before I leave this country.

This made me to ask her again if we are ending up together and she told me that she has to seek for her mother's consent, and would give me a feedback.

Before, she travelled (this is just before the lock down) as she was complaining that she does not have any money on her to eat and she want to go and learn how to plait hair which will cost her #8,000, I gave her #16,000. The next day after collecting the money, she told me that she received a call from her mother that she must come back to her State and she travelled with that money without learning anything.

Yesterday by 8:24pm, I called her to tell me the outcome of her mother's discussion with her. She told me that her mother insisted that she cannot marry an Ebonyi man, and she cannot go outside her mother's decision.

In conclusion, she told me that she cannot marry me.

Well, as expected, I'm bracing myself up for insults, (I really don't mind this right now) but amidst the insults, pls advice a brother who's fighting emotionally.

thanks

378 Likes 36 Shares

Re: Her Mother Said She Can't Marry An Ebonyi Man by milliman(m): 2:09pm On Apr 19, 2020
That's really sad to read but no matter how dark the night gets sun will always shine when the time is right. Let her go there is no compulsion in love you no fit do am but force

586 Likes 20 Shares

Re: Her Mother Said She Can't Marry An Ebonyi Man by Spaceclenzy1(m): 2:10pm On Apr 19, 2020
Is one of those things.. She might still come back.. Women are jst like dat.. Dnt beat urself up too much.. Loving can never be a crime no matter the outcome.. U did all that because u love her.. She jst feel lik confirming hw it will be outside.. When she test other guys she will come back.. Don't beat urself up at all

296 Likes 18 Shares

Re: Her Mother Said She Can't Marry An Ebonyi Man by Johntitus: 2:11pm On Apr 19, 2020
Hahahaha... You're your problem. How can you shoulder the responsibilities of a lady you've not married? Sha, no too much money dey shack you.

746 Likes 35 Shares

Re: Her Mother Said She Can't Marry An Ebonyi Man by MARX77(m): 2:21pm On Apr 19, 2020
Permit me to list out a few things

1. From the beginning of the relationship, you have probably given this girl d mindset that if she leaves u, u r done for.

2. Bro, if u use money take open relationship, ready to dey drop money... So all this your expenses here and there na u cos am. Never use money as a means to hold down a woman, they're always in need, and most of them will go for the highest bidder.

3. I don't know who needs to hear this, except the girl na ur wife, never ever let a lady influence decisions that u know can make your life better. NEVER DO THAT. Make decisions to better ur life, Bleep whatever she thinks.

4. Boss, any girl when dey look for consent to marry you don go already. Forget her...

5. You're lucky you passed your exam, you for know afa

6. I can bet my left ass that your lady has someone already promising her the moon and the stars. SHE'S GONE BRO.

MY ADVICE: Brace yourself, retrace your steps and before she drops the bombshell on you,
Break up with her in a very dope way, like stars do, no fight, no insults.

YOUR FUTURE IS BRIGHT MAN, take it from me, ON GOD.

*Drops mic*

1847 Likes 168 Shares

Re: Her Mother Said She Can't Marry An Ebonyi Man by tunize(m): 2:21pm On Apr 19, 2020
You even spend money pass the girl papa or mama wen send her go school.well, that is love for you my brother u don try for her.
For advice level u don't need any because she already told you she can't marry u because of their tribal watever. U seem to love this ur girl more than she loves u because, it seems she's not even convincing her mom to look beyond tribe and look ur personality as a non Anambra LET HER BE.

202 Likes 5 Shares

Re: Her Mother Said She Can't Marry An Ebonyi Man by Usorohtheman(m): 2:22pm On Apr 19, 2020
Learn the lessons from this and move on. She might come back but make sure you scrutinize her well before accepting her back if as at then, you don't have another girl. Good luck bro

By the way, you seem to be made financially, can you show me the way?

74 Likes 8 Shares

Re: Her Mother Said She Can't Marry An Ebonyi Man by fattprince(m): 2:22pm On Apr 19, 2020
Spaceclenzy1:
Is one of those things.. She might still come back.. Women are jst like dat.. Dnt beat urself up too much.. Loving can never be a crime no matter the outcome.. U did all that because u love her.. She jst feel lik confirming hw it will be outside.. When she test other guys she will come back.. Don't beat urself up at all
Op has this bro has said she will come back. So here is where my own advice comes in. Anytime she comes make sure you kick her ass out of your face. I mean it literally. Like tell her you don't want her again then she will beg you while shedding tears but don't say anything. Then when she realise that you wouldn't heed to her pleading and when she wants to start going KICK HER IN HER BUTT. Then tell her to go fvck with her Enugu guys

337 Likes 19 Shares

Re: Her Mother Said She Can't Marry An Ebonyi Man by Nobody: 2:36pm On Apr 19, 2020
I'm happy you've braced up for insults. You are a really big fool not to know that you cannot train a lady through the university and she will end up with you. Only a minute number will. A whole medical student? This gullible? When in my school medical students are the most sought after you are here being fooled by a young girl.
Let me tell you what a girl told me just b4 she broke up with her bf cos of a doctor. Her mum told her that even though she's studying mls she must come back with a doctor as husband o. Cos the other girls who are marrying doctors don't have extra breast and yansh and she cannot understand why she will send her to medical school and she will say she married a radiographer...
To be honest that is the most wicked thing I've heard a mother tell her daughter about any man in the medical field irrespective of designation but that's to tell u how much doctors are sought after cos everyone knows they run out of the country once they are done. So for u to be played for a fool right from 200 level beats me. Now who is better off after you both count your losses? Of course she is cos that money you gave her could have been used to better yourself or just left in the bank to accumulate dust. Hope you've learnt your life lesson. We as men must fall mugu to get wisdom. All of us bashing you have been in this shoes but yours is by far the dumbest I've ever seen.

Wait, you even passed up an opportunity to travel out cos of her? Ah my brother whoever do you this thing no go die well...even the ladies here would laugh at your stupidity...

782 Likes 78 Shares

Re: Her Mother Said She Can't Marry An Ebonyi Man by fredopareto(m): 2:37pm On Apr 19, 2020
Spaceclenzy1:
Is one of those things.. She might still come back.. Women are jst like dat.. Dnt beat urself up too much.. Loving can never be a crime no matter the outcome.. U did all that because u love her.. She jst feel lik confirming hw it will be outside.. When she test other guys she will come back.. Don't beat urself up at all
shey na talk u talk Naw..so he should wait wen she don test all guyz.wat is assurance dt she will mak a u turn..can u accept it ?

43 Likes 1 Share

Re: Her Mother Said She Can't Marry An Ebonyi Man by Nobody: 2:48pm On Apr 19, 2020
Spaceclenzy1:
Is one of those things.. She might still come back.. Women are jst like dat.. Dnt beat urself up too much.. Loving can never be a crime no matter the outcome.. U did all that because u love her.. She jst feel lik confirming hw it will be outside.. When she test other guys she will come back.. Don't beat urself up at all
My friend stop being a wimp. This love was a crime against his own future and his uncle who wanted him to go abroad. By now he would have graduated and would have been making more then enough money to pay back his uncle not to talk of his parents. Do u know what his family has lost cos of his foolishness for that girl?

230 Likes 17 Shares

Re: Her Mother Said She Can't Marry An Ebonyi Man by Sam119(m): 2:54pm On Apr 19, 2020
OP if she is really into u, she will fight to break protocols and any cultural ish just to be with u for life.
Bro, let her be and focus on ur goals in life to be a better person. But if she comes back tomorrow and u decide to take her back, then ur village people is using ur head to play draft, trust me.
Bro Code: Never be a standby Gen. when ever NEPA light is gone. cool

183 Likes 11 Shares

Re: Her Mother Said She Can't Marry An Ebonyi Man by daddytime(m): 2:55pm On Apr 19, 2020
Eyaa

I feel for you bro.

Naivety has sent a good number of us on the same errand in the past but not to worry, man up, pick your self up and March on.

You haven't even started life yet bro, you've still got a whole deal of your life ahead of you.

Believe me, the only thing you owe yourself is to make sure she regrets playing with your emotions. That's the fuel you need to soldier on and I'm sure you know where to get that, yeah, from within you.

Better yourself and make the next sister want to damn her parents for your love not minding stereotypes.

On a lighter note:

May God not push us to meet a doctor or nurse like op's babe for injection when we have malaria. Ameeeen.

105 Likes 4 Shares

Re: Her Mother Said She Can't Marry An Ebonyi Man by FatherBona: 2:57pm On Apr 19, 2020
Op your mumu part 2 go dey am abi?!?
Fresh Doctor to be like you dey allow woman use your head since 200lvl grin



Moderators please move to FP ..........nairalanders let's drop the insult as its hot on the OP.
Maybe he will come to his senses.

MARX77:
[b] Permit me to list out a few things

1. From the beginning of the relationship, you have probably given this girl d mindset that if she leaves u, u r done for.

2. Bro, if u use money take open relationship, ready to dey drop money... So all this your expenses here and there na u cos am. Never use money as a means to hold down a woman, they're always in need, and most of them will go for the highest bidder.

3. I don't know who needs to hear this, except the girl na ur wife, never ever let a lady influence decisions that u know can make your life better. NEVER DO THAT. Make decisions to better ur life, Bleep whatever she thinks.

4. Boss, any girl when dey look for consent to marry you don go already. Forget her...

5. You're lucky you passed your exam, you for know afa

6. I can bet my left ass that your lady has someone already promising her the moon and the stars. SHE'S GONE BRO.

MY ADVICE: Brace yourself, retrace your steps and before she drops the bombshell on you,
Break up with her in a very dope way, like stars do, no fight, no insults.

YOUR FUTURE IS BRIGHT MAN, take it from me, ON GOD.

*Drops mic*[/b]

Please give this man one plate of Dog meat

166 Likes 8 Shares

Re: Her Mother Said She Can't Marry An Ebonyi Man by Nobody: 2:58pm On Apr 19, 2020
Why must you marry before leaving to study overseas? Is it a requirement, or just your brother's suggestion?

I suppose, from your account, that your brother is the one taking care of you, and by extension, your girlfriend, financially. Does he know about her? If he does (which he in fact, should), have you intimated him about latest developments?

Whatever you decide to settle for in the end, don't beg for her love, you will have to keep doing that for the rest of your life with her, if you do.

Take my Advise, I don't need it.

48 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Her Mother Said She Can't Marry An Ebonyi Man by missimelda01(f): 3:00pm On Apr 19, 2020
You only told us the things you did for her, what of the things she did for you?
Did you notice at any point in the relationship that she was acting uninterested?
Marriage is a huge step, did you both have marriage in view while dating?
Parents have huge influence on some people, maybe she's one of them.

In conclusion, it's not advisable to convince someone to marry you.. move on with your life, you'd find someone else who'll feel the same way about you.

40 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Her Mother Said She Can't Marry An Ebonyi Man by Giwoni: 3:03pm On Apr 19, 2020
milliman:


That's really sad to read but no matter how dark the night gets sun will always shine when the time is right. Let her go there is no compulsion in love you no fit do am but force
Thanks man

4 Likes

Re: Her Mother Said She Can't Marry An Ebonyi Man by Giwoni: 3:05pm On Apr 19, 2020
Johntitus:
Hahahaha... You're your problem. How can you shoulder the responsibilities of a lady you've not married? Sha, no too much money dey shack you.
is not that I have too much money but it that she was my first love! Thanks

4 Likes

Re: Her Mother Said She Can't Marry An Ebonyi Man by Giwoni: 3:14pm On Apr 19, 2020
missimelda01:
You only told us the things you did for her, what of the things she did for you?
Did you notice at any point in the relationship that she was acting uninterested?
Marriage is a huge step, did you both have marriage in view while dating?
Parents have huge influence on some people, maybe she's one of them.

In conclusion, it's not advisable to convince someone to marry you.. move on with your life, you'd find someone else who'll feel the same way about you.
She usually give me sex whenever she wants, she also cook for me occasionally, which I cooked more for her.
she also gives me fruits which I did more than that.
In 2019, I noticed she was acting uninterested but went on to tell my male class mate that she has made her mind to be with me while waiting for her parents conclusion.
In the beginning, she was even the person that brought marriage up.

I have not even gone quarter of what I did for her which she usually tells me that she doesn't have any to give me in return.

32 Likes 1 Share

Re: Her Mother Said She Can't Marry An Ebonyi Man by Giwoni: 3:16pm On Apr 19, 2020
Ricchcream:
Why must you marry before leaving to study overseas? Is it a requirement, or just your brother's suggestion?

I suppose, from your account, that your brother is the one taking care of you, and by extension, your girlfriend, financially. Does he know about her? If he does (which he in fact, should), have you intimated him about latest developments?

Whatever you decide to settle for in the end, don't beg for her love, you will have to keep doing that for the rest of your life with her, if you do.

Take my Advise, I don't need it.
Thanks. I appreciate.

4 Likes

Re: Her Mother Said She Can't Marry An Ebonyi Man by Johntitus: 3:24pm On Apr 19, 2020
Giwoni:
is not that I have too much money but it that she was my first love! Thanks

Oh.... First love is too complicated. You go just dey act like Jesus.

50 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Her Mother Said She Can't Marry An Ebonyi Man by T3ndrils: 3:57pm On Apr 19, 2020
I was so pissed and angry at the OP Until I saw this guy's write up...

There's Hope for Men at last.
Atimes I wonder why I have to be so mean to some girls but when I see these things OP is going through it becomes clear that they deserve being mistreated...


MARX77:
Permit me to list out a few things

1. From the beginning of the relationship, you have probably given this girl d mindset that if she leaves u, u r done for.

2. Bro, if u use money take open relationship, ready to dey drop money... So all this your expenses here and there na u cos am. Never use money as a means to hold down a woman, they're always in need, and most of them will go for the highest bidder.

3. I don't know who needs to hear this, except the girl na ur wife, never ever let a lady influence decisions that u know can make your life better. NEVER DO THAT. Make decisions to better ur life, Bleep whatever she thinks.

4. Boss, any girl when dey look for consent to marry you don go already. Forget her...

5. You're lucky you passed your exam, you for know afa

6. I can bet my left ass that your lady has someone already promising her the moon and the stars. SHE'S GONE BRO.

MY ADVICE: Brace yourself, retrace your steps and before she drops the bombshell on you,
Break up with her in a very dope way, like stars do, no fight, no insults.

YOUR FUTURE IS BRIGHT MAN, take it from me, ON GOD.

*Drops mic*

42 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Her Mother Said She Can't Marry An Ebonyi Man by danduchi(m): 4:10pm On Apr 19, 2020
@Giwoni, get yourself another girl, spend time with her and completely avoid this your said gfriend. Give her excuses when she demands for money. Be a man, be strong. Make her know u have another lady and see how she come begging for your attention

32 Likes 1 Share

Re: Her Mother Said She Can't Marry An Ebonyi Man by kriss27(m): 4:37pm On Apr 19, 2020
missimelda01:
You only told us the things you did for her, what of the things she did for you?
Did you notice at any point in the relationship that she was acting uninterested?
Marriage is a huge step, did you both have marriage in view while dating?
Parents have huge influence on some people, maybe she's one of them.

In conclusion, it's not advisable to convince someone to marry you.. move on with your life, you'd find someone else who'll feel the same way about you.
This is all you have to say?If it was your brother would you have said the samething?Women!

82 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Her Mother Said She Can't Marry An Ebonyi Man by Giwoni: 4:38pm On Apr 19, 2020
danduchi:
@Giwoni, get yourself another girl, give her spend time with her and completely avoid this your said gfriend. Give her excuses when she demands for money. Be a man, be strong. Make her know u have another lady and see how she come begging for your attention
Thanks. I appreciate

5 Likes

Re: Her Mother Said She Can't Marry An Ebonyi Man by missimelda01(f): 4:39pm On Apr 19, 2020
kriss27:
This is all you have to say?If it was your brother would you have said the samething?Women!
I don't get you, the story is one sided.. what do you expect me to say

3 Likes 3 Shares

Re: Her Mother Said She Can't Marry An Ebonyi Man by Jas80: 4:41pm On Apr 19, 2020
greatResearcher come and add this guy to your list

13 Likes

Re: Her Mother Said She Can't Marry An Ebonyi Man by Nobody: 4:42pm On Apr 19, 2020
missimelda01:
You only told us the things you did for her, what of the things she did for you?
Did you notice at any point in the relationship that she was acting uninterested?
Marriage is a huge step, did you both have marriage in view while dating?
Parents have huge influence on some people, maybe she's one of them.

In conclusion, it's not advisable to convince someone to marry you.. move on with your life, you'd find someone else who'll feel the same way about you.
what else would she do for him aside having sex with him (of which she also enjoyed) ? Isn't sex all you women got to offer undecided

165 Likes 12 Shares

Re: Her Mother Said She Can't Marry An Ebonyi Man by missimelda01(f): 4:43pm On Apr 19, 2020
Giwoni:
She usually give me sex whenever she wants, she also cook for me occasionally, which I cooked more for her.
she also gives me fruits which I did more than that.
In 2019, I noticed she was acting uninterested but went on to tell my male class mate that she has made her mind to be with me while waiting for her parents conclusion.
In the beginning, she was even the person that brought marriage up.

I have not even gone quarter of what I did for her which she usually tells me that she doesn't have any to give me in return.

It could be that her parents influenced her decision, she wouldn't mention marriage in the first place if she didn't see a future with you or maybe she got bored of the relationship and found someone else...things like this happen, it's sad.

I already told you to move on, life happens.

8 Likes 1 Share

Re: Her Mother Said She Can't Marry An Ebonyi Man by Nobody: 4:45pm On Apr 19, 2020
Johntitus:
Hahahaha... You're your problem. How can you shoulder the responsibilities of a lady you've not married? Sha, no too much money dey shack you.
shiiiiiii

3 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Her Mother Said She Can't Marry An Ebonyi Man by missimelda01(f): 4:46pm On Apr 19, 2020
Descorts:
what else would she do for him aside having sex with him (of which she also enjoyed) ? Isn't sex all you women got to offer undecided

Is sex the only thing your mom offered your dad? Please I'm not having this conversation with you, the person I asked the question has answered.

26 Likes 6 Shares

Re: Her Mother Said She Can't Marry An Ebonyi Man by Nobody: 4:49pm On Apr 19, 2020
Spaceclenzy1:
Is one of those things.. She might still come back.. Women are jst like dat.. Dnt beat urself up too much.. Loving can never be a crime no matter the outcome.. U did all that because u love her.. She jst feel lik confirming hw it will be outside.. When she test other guys she will come back . . Don't beat urself up at all

grin

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