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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / My Fellow Married Women And Mothers, How Do You Deal With A Husband Like Mine? (131507 Views)
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Re: My Fellow Married Women And Mothers, How Do You Deal With A Husband Like Mine? by crackkhaus: 5:28pm On May 02, 2020 |
sassysure:See, Sass...on this, you and I operate on completely different philosophies. I personally do not believe anyone changes (speaking of adults here), not children or teens. This is one of my guiding principles in human relationships. I'm even much more comfortable with people who are transparent enough to show their negatives as well as their positives...at least you know exactly who you're dealing with and can work around it. That false expectation which you noted as the reason why people change, is rooted on idealism - the need to focus only on positives, the belief that archangels walk the earth in human form. Any man/woman who appears too good to be true, is definitely too good to be true. This is reality. 37 Likes 3 Shares |
Re: My Fellow Married Women And Mothers, How Do You Deal With A Husband Like Mine? by crackkhaus: 5:29pm On May 02, 2020 |
sassysure:Dear, if my sister tell me say she wan leave, I won't advise her otherwise. I don't baby adults, female or male... What a person wants is what he/she should say, ain't no one got time to be psychoanalyzing what someone really means beneath what they are saying. 16 Likes |
Re: My Fellow Married Women And Mothers, How Do You Deal With A Husband Like Mine? by Nobody: 5:30pm On May 02, 2020 |
Drizzy5001: The bolded is wrong on so many levels, so many innocent lives have been cut short because of those words, you're lucky your mum is still alive. 41 Likes |
Re: My Fellow Married Women And Mothers, How Do You Deal With A Husband Like Mine? by Nobody: 5:32pm On May 02, 2020 |
Ishilove: |
Re: My Fellow Married Women And Mothers, How Do You Deal With A Husband Like Mine? by Ishilove: 5:34pm On May 02, 2020 |
nahzyla:If a lady says she wants to marry a man who is established, they will call her a goldigger. Now that she has chosen to build life small small with a broke man, he has turned out to be an ungrateful asshole. Love gbakwuoku biko. 52 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: My Fellow Married Women And Mothers, How Do You Deal With A Husband Like Mine? by Drizzy5001(m): 5:35pm On May 02, 2020 |
Ardar:u are right dear. 1 Like |
Re: My Fellow Married Women And Mothers, How Do You Deal With A Husband Like Mine? by infogenius(m): 5:36pm On May 02, 2020 |
op I won't say you lie because I know a woman I met online too that is going through a similar issue that we are working on but definitely not you. Kindly apologize to him, living with your husband and not talking for 7 days is harsh. Do it because you are displaying wisdom and that you are not a weakling. Your home has to be a peaceful haven. I don't care what your home is going through as long s you earn you must have savings. Save 10% of your earnings. This can be used to start a business in future or even as a bailout one day. Save money. Buy yourself little things you need like shoes and the likes. How can you be working and struggle to get little things? It's not convenient but squeeze through. For this another 10%. Pay your tithe if you are a tither and the remaining 70% you can put into your family. Many women like you these till they go to their graves, their men put them under pressure because they have made themselves available. This is not bad but should not be a norm. As much as possible, be yourself show him you are still the woman he married and of course avoid unnecessary arguments with him. Your silence will not make you stupid or a weakling. It demonstrates maturity. I can go on and on, but immediately go to him and tell him sorry. 8 Likes |
Re: My Fellow Married Women And Mothers, How Do You Deal With A Husband Like Mine? by Ishilove: 5:37pm On May 02, 2020 |
crackkhaus:Home breaker |
Re: My Fellow Married Women And Mothers, How Do You Deal With A Husband Like Mine? by Nobody: 5:37pm On May 02, 2020 |
Seriously some Nigerian men are just a joke,I got hooked up with a guy, well i am not sure if he is broke or not,but the manner he commands me made me to have a rethink, everything he wants you to apologize even the one he is guilty of, well as for me, am working and doing well,I can't because of marriage put my neck in a hook. Least I forget,he will tell you that he is the man bla bla... Yersterday,he insulted me like kilode, I just replied, thank you. Nah so I take jakpa..I can't kill myself on top man and marriage matter. Nne, please try and have some savings no matter how small, pray harder, you have already entered, you can't jakpa like that,I pray the man turns a new leaf soonest. 49 Likes 1 Share |
Re: My Fellow Married Women And Mothers, How Do You Deal With A Husband Like Mine? by Ishilove: 5:38pm On May 02, 2020 |
infogenius:^^ Birds of similar plumage 24 Likes |
Re: My Fellow Married Women And Mothers, How Do You Deal With A Husband Like Mine? by Nobody: 5:39pm On May 02, 2020 |
MizJaY:Seriously some Nigerian men are just a joke,I got hooked up with a guy, well i am not sure if he is broke or not,but the manner he commands me made me to have a rethink, everything he wants you to apologize even the one he is guilty of, well as for me, am working and doing well,I can't because of marriage put my neck in a hook. Yersterday,he insulted me like kilode, I just replied, thank you. Nah so I take jakpa..I can't kill myself on top man and marriage matter. Nne, please try and have some savings no matter how small, pray harder, you have already entered, you can't jakpa like that,I pray the man turns a new leaf soonest. 4 Likes |
Re: My Fellow Married Women And Mothers, How Do You Deal With A Husband Like Mine? by Jessicafyne: 5:40pm On May 02, 2020 |
aeion:The bolded is so not true and it’s not always the case. Some men know how to pretend and behave the right way just to tie the knot. Some men that are like this are the type of boyfriends that apologise or call you many times even when the girlfriend is wrong or never keep malice. Please all this blanket “you must have known he was like that but you still married him” it’s not true for all cases. Unless you knew them when they were dating you have no right to insinuate this was the case. Dating and being married are different things, there are some scenarios where you can never know how the person will react or behave unless you live with them 24 hrs. 23 Likes |
Re: My Fellow Married Women And Mothers, How Do You Deal With A Husband Like Mine? by crackkhaus: 5:41pm On May 02, 2020 |
Ishilove:Tell that to your sisters here 7 Likes |
Re: My Fellow Married Women And Mothers, How Do You Deal With A Husband Like Mine? by infogenius(m): 5:41pm On May 02, 2020 |
Ishilove: meaning? |
Re: My Fellow Married Women And Mothers, How Do You Deal With A Husband Like Mine? by Ishilove: 5:42pm On May 02, 2020 |
crackkhaus:Nairaland Association of Home Wreckers |
Re: My Fellow Married Women And Mothers, How Do You Deal With A Husband Like Mine? by crackkhaus: 5:43pm On May 02, 2020 |
Ishilove:No be only me waka come 5 Likes 1 Share |
Re: My Fellow Married Women And Mothers, How Do You Deal With A Husband Like Mine? by Ishilove: 5:45pm On May 02, 2020 |
infogenius:Meaning that you and the Op's husband are same ten and ten pence. The woman is complaining of being taken for granted by an egomanic husband and you are advising her to go back to keep apologising. What is her crime? If she offended him then what's stops him from hashing it out instead of keeping malice for over a week? How long will she keep apologising even when she is not at fault? That shit_ can do serious damage to a person's self esteem. 44 Likes 1 Share |
Re: My Fellow Married Women And Mothers, How Do You Deal With A Husband Like Mine? by Ishilove: 5:46pm On May 02, 2020 |
crackkhaus:We are many |
Re: My Fellow Married Women And Mothers, How Do You Deal With A Husband Like Mine? by Nobody: 5:47pm On May 02, 2020 |
Jessicafyne:Are you the OP? |
Re: My Fellow Married Women And Mothers, How Do You Deal With A Husband Like Mine? by ibkayee(f): 5:47pm On May 02, 2020 |
Jessicafyne:Exactly 16 Likes 1 Share |
Re: My Fellow Married Women And Mothers, How Do You Deal With A Husband Like Mine? by Jessicafyne: 5:49pm On May 02, 2020 |
aeion:Also, to add, not only you don’t have the right it’s also insensitive asf. 3 Likes |
Re: My Fellow Married Women And Mothers, How Do You Deal With A Husband Like Mine? by Galactico4ever(m): 5:49pm On May 02, 2020 |
Nne my sis, I am sorry you are going through this hell. My advice is to simply spend as small time as possible with him,take all those suggestions about savings and start planning the rest of your without him. If you can,consider other wealthy prospective men too. STAY STRONG 3 Likes |
Re: My Fellow Married Women And Mothers, How Do You Deal With A Husband Like Mine? by Nobody: 5:50pm On May 02, 2020 |
Jessicafyne:Your headache, not mine. |
Re: My Fellow Married Women And Mothers, How Do You Deal With A Husband Like Mine? by infogenius(m): 5:53pm On May 02, 2020 |
Ishilove: Because I asked her to apologize doesn't make me the same with him. You are of the opinion that she continues to keep malice with her husband because she doesn't know what she has done. I hope you will accommodate her if this issue aggravates to separation. A stitch in time saves nine If she knows she can't continue in the marriage why remain there. But if she's interested in making her marriage work, there is no crime if she moves for peace in her home. Your comment clearly tells me you want her to keep malice for as long as possible which is not decent advice. 9 Likes |
Re: My Fellow Married Women And Mothers, How Do You Deal With A Husband Like Mine? by Ishilove: 6:04pm On May 02, 2020 |
infogenius:But you do know that it takes two to make a marriage work? 28 Likes 1 Share |
Re: My Fellow Married Women And Mothers, How Do You Deal With A Husband Like Mine? by infogenius(m): 6:05pm On May 02, 2020 |
Ishilove:Yes, I know that very well. I also know that two wrongs can not make a right 7 Likes |
Re: My Fellow Married Women And Mothers, How Do You Deal With A Husband Like Mine? by Ishilove: 6:09pm On May 02, 2020 |
infogenius:And how long do you propose one person carries the burden of making a marriage work? 30 Likes 3 Shares |
Re: My Fellow Married Women And Mothers, How Do You Deal With A Husband Like Mine? by EJIOGBENIMI(m): 6:13pm On May 02, 2020 |
God will see you through. 3 Likes |
Re: My Fellow Married Women And Mothers, How Do You Deal With A Husband Like Mine? by infogenius(m): 6:14pm On May 02, 2020 |
Ishilove: As long as possible. And if he or she feels it is not working as expected, then the dissolution of the marriage is inevitable. 6 Likes |
Re: My Fellow Married Women And Mothers, How Do You Deal With A Husband Like Mine? by Nobody: 6:14pm On May 02, 2020 |
crackkhaus:Situations change people. Maybe u didn't get my analogy. Let me give you example. Most if not all married men want a child. Now, if that child is not forthcoming and it happens that the wife has fibroid, as time goes on, such man usually fulfil his quest for a child outside or marry another wife. But before then he has started acting funny. A man that expects to make it in life and life happens to have dealt a heavy blow with him is usually aggressive and lash out to the next closest person to him as coping mechanism. The two scenarios above were not how the two men originally appeared to be but as a result of change. The same can be said about women. This is the deep truth about marital relationship we deny that exist. When things don't go as you want it, that's when u notice your spouse nags, is extravagant, drinks, keep late nights etc or even dirty. The reason for so high divorce rate is simply spouses not meeting up to expectations. 24 Likes 1 Share |
Re: My Fellow Married Women And Mothers, How Do You Deal With A Husband Like Mine? by Richy4(m): 6:24pm On May 02, 2020 |
Ardar: You are right but do they allow Nigerians to write their marital vows? If the clause of better or worse is included in one's marital vow then, they should try and abide by it.. if they don't need it, they should change it 3 Likes |
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