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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Romance / Why Do We Ignore Male Rape Cases? (5955 Views)
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Re: Why Do We Ignore Male Rape Cases? by angelfallz(m): 8:04am On May 12, 2020 |
Trayceey:Exactly! it is the same way that female victims enjoy being raped. |
Re: Why Do We Ignore Male Rape Cases? by angelfallz(m): 8:08am On May 12, 2020 |
Kobojunkie: Please, it is not a nigerian cultural thing. It is all over the world. Check the response of american white women that were caught raping their underage male students. You would see comments like, "that boy enjoyed it", "it is every teenage boy's dream" etc So it is not only in Nigeria. |
Re: Why Do We Ignore Male Rape Cases? by angelfallz(m): 8:31am On May 12, 2020 |
In the end @GreatResearcher1, @Martinez39s you can see clearly for yourselves that what we are fighting is systemic. You even have men like @SageMK who are more than willing to be rape apologists when the victim is male, but are ready to raise hell when the victim is a female. It is not his fault per se. it is as a result of systemic conditioning. @GreatResearcher1 you won't find empathy here or anywhere. I would say this, start moving together with men of like mind to you, with the aim of starting an NGO exclusively for men, this NGO would be tasked with raising awareness of male rape and ensuring that female perpetrators are jailed. You are a victim of rape, why should you allow other boys and men to go through the say ordeal? Do something about it. I appreciate you starting a thread about male rape victims, but it should go beyond that. An NGO or an organisation exclusively for men would help a lot. i have the intentions of doing something similar, although it is not about male rape. it has to do with job opportunities and access to loans for men(story for another day). @Martinez39s you can do the same, choose an area where men are being unfairly treated and try to change it through your organisation or NGO Also, another very important area that should never be ignored, POLITICS. getting men that unbiased towards the male gender into positions of power should never be ignored. This is because no matter what we do, if the laws of the land are biased and favour women then all efforts are in vain. Lastly, stay away from men like @SageMK even in real life. They are toxic! If you are a man and reading this you can also help in your own way, dont deceive yourself by saying it can never happen to me or it is impossible. 1 Like 1 Share |
Re: Why Do We Ignore Male Rape Cases? by AlphaStorm: 8:35am On May 12, 2020 |
Because society values male work but doesnt value male lives. Infact, male lives dont matter |
Re: Why Do We Ignore Male Rape Cases? by germaphobe(m): 8:57am On May 12, 2020 |
just last week tuesday after buying airtime for aunty ifeoma i was forced to give her a head. if i had not done it she would have reversed the case and make it seem like she is the victim, and all would believe her cus we were too close. now i don't even greet nor talk to her and everyone is trying to know what went wrong but i can't say cus i will only be laughed at for being a weak guy man. |
Re: Why Do We Ignore Male Rape Cases? by We4all: 11:09am On May 12, 2020 |
angelfallz: Why not counter my reasons instead of ranting incoherently? Until then, just pretend you never read my comments. |
Re: Why Do We Ignore Male Rape Cases? by Keketu(m): 12:30pm On May 12, 2020 |
Kobojunkie: ![]() ![]() ![]() |
Re: Why Do We Ignore Male Rape Cases? by Kobojunkie: 1:10pm On May 12, 2020 |
angelfallz: Where the rapists in question prosecuted and charged for the crimes committed in the american case? If yes, then that should key you i to the difference between the Nigeria situation and that which was discussed by the american chatters you refer to. Many of the Nigerian cases never make it to the courts, and so the culprits ever prosecuted because the prevailing culture in Nigeria sees to that. That is a cultural issue that need be overcome for the sake of the victims, at least. |
Re: Why Do We Ignore Male Rape Cases? by Kobojunkie: 1:19pm On May 12, 2020 |
angelfallz:He is right about this. This is a cultural issue , that is closely tied to oir patriarchal society |
Re: Why Do We Ignore Male Rape Cases? by We4all: 1:59pm On May 12, 2020 |
Martinez39s: I think your problem is, 'you're just being sentimental and not factual', and this is an attribute displayed by most humans. My points were raised based on experience and how the typical human reasons. Hey, it is human nature to show empathy towards people whom we feel have been more physically bruised and have suffered a lot of physical damages than others. When a rape occurs, the victim experiences a lot of pains; both physically and emotionally. But unfortunately, very few pay attention to their emotional battles. In fact, very few pay attention to our emotional battles ( whether we are rape victims or not). So, this leaves us with the physical pains and consequences. And as for the physical consequences: "Do you know the number of pregnant women who have been called names, but unknown to the public, their pregnancy was as a result of rape"? Do we begin to talk about those who were slut shamed right here on this forum, and accused of seducing their rapists with their dressing mode? So tell me mister, how many male victims have experienced half of what their female counterparts go through both physically and emotionally? I have seen cases where women were asked to pack out of their matrimonial homes for being victims of rape. How many men will ever experience something like that in Nigeria? And yeah, I'm not denying the fact that male kids are victims of rape as well, and I questioned the OP's claim not because he is a male, but because he loves to throw tantrums and sounded like he just needed his topic to be on front page. And as for the male kids who were victims of rape: Although I feel empathy for them, but this doesn't change the fact that despite them suffering emotionally, and might have contacted STD in the process, there is no physical evidence that they lost their virginity, and there is no possibility that they will grow up and be called names like "whores" (by some unreasonable men) just because, they are no longer virgins. So, tell me why female rape cases shouldn't be given more attention since women experience more devastating effects than men? Would you question why Covid-19 patients are paid more attention to than patients suffering from a slight headache (considering the fact that the former has a more devastating consequences)? Some things are the way they are, and can never change, because human nature has made it so. So, until men start carrying pregnancy, and their bodies begin to show physical signs when disvirgined, then the society will start to pay more attention to male rape victims. Lastly, you must be living under a rock to state that: "It is unlikely that a parent would do nothing if his/her daughter accused a houseboy/relative of sexual assault". Seriously, you obviously don't know how the average Nigerian parents think or act towards their children(especially the poor ones). Majority are irresponsible and lack parenting skills, and will dismiss claims by their kids of being molested by uncles, fathers, because they consider such scandals as embarrassing. And hey, Busola never spoke up as a teenager because, the backlash she would have received from the public would have been enough to push her to commit suicide. She opened up when she was strong enough to handle the insults and names calling hurled at her. And one of her reasons for speaking up was because, "the pain of a female losing one's virginity to rape never heals". |
Re: Why Do We Ignore Male Rape Cases? by Newbielearner(m): 2:44pm On May 12, 2020 |
Even aside male rape, there's no justice when there's false accusation. When you just get a call that you were watching her in the bathroom while you were washing your car (just because you don't usually greet her at all). There's no equality. They expect you to feel happy because they touched your prick. It has been since the time of Joseph. It is now (Johnny Depp and co can testify), and it would still be. Because our society is full of simp in the high places. However, men that actually rape should never go unpunished as well. 1 Like 1 Share |
Re: Why Do We Ignore Male Rape Cases? by angelfallz(m): 3:00pm On May 12, 2020 |
Kobojunkie: What would you now say about countries like America, England etc, where male rape victims are not taken seriously?! The problem is that you people just assume. Go into foreign forums and read about what is happening overseas. Also there is no such thing as patriarchy, the word patriarchy was invented by feminists. |
Re: Why Do We Ignore Male Rape Cases? by angelfallz(m): 3:03pm On May 12, 2020 |
Kobojunkie: Guy when there are female victims aren't the perpetrators brought to book? The issue is not whether the perpetrators are brought to book, the issue is, are male victims taken seriously? Go through threads on nairaland or on twitter or Facebook, when there is a male victim and when there is a female victim. the difference is very clear, don't try to pretend. |
Re: Why Do We Ignore Male Rape Cases? by Martinez39s(m): 3:36pm On May 12, 2020 |
We4all:I was not being sentimental. My points were raised based on experience and how the typical human reasons.Your argument were thoughtless and out of touch with reality. Seems you wrote it out of strong emotions instead of logic. Hey, it is human nature to show empathy towards people whom we feel have been more physically bruised and have suffered a lot of physical damages than others. When a rape occurs, the victim experiences a lot of pains; both physically and emotionally. But unfortunately, very few pay attention to their emotional battles. In fact, very few pay attention to our emotional battles ( whether we are rape victims or not). So, this leaves us with the physical pains and consequences.First of all, who told you female rape victims suffer more than male rape victims? Apart from pregnancy, what emotional and psychological trauma or harm can a female rape victim suffer that a male rape victim cannot? I really don't get the point behind this emotional ramblings. And as for the physical consequences: "Do you know the number of pregnant women who have been called names, but unknown to the public, their pregnancy was as a result of rape"?Pregnant women called names in an era of baby mamas? ![]() Do we begin to talk about those who were slut shamed right here on this forum, and accused of seducing their rapists with their dressing mode?If the words of female rape apologists (which are a minority) can be counted as trauma, what about the male rape apologists (which are many) that sweep male rape under the carpet with "male rape is not a thing," "it's free prissy," "a woman cannot rape a man" etc.? Shouldn't that be counted? So tell me mister, how many male victims have experienced half of what their female counterparts go through both physically and emotionally?I have already shown that your preceding arguments are thoughtless. What emotional and psychological trauma do female rape victims suffer that male rape victims don't suffer? I have seen cases where women were asked to pack out of their matrimonial homes for being victims of rape. How many men will ever experience something like that in Nigeria?Na so. Even if such happens, many men can't suffer the same because most men are either the owners of their houses, or they pay the rent. And yeah, I'm not denying the fact that male kids are victims of rape as well, and I questioned the OP's claim not because he is a male, but because he loves to throw tantrums and sounded like he just needed his topic to be on front page.That aside, do you think male rape is wrong and SHOULD be taken very seriously? I ask because it's one thing to give YOUR reasons as to why society treat both cases differently, and it's another to actually buy into these reasons. Answer. GreatResearcher1 And as for the male kids who were victims of rape: Although I feel empathy for them, but this doesn't change the fact that despite them suffering emotionally, and might have contacted STD in the process, there is no physical evidence that they lost their virginity, and there is no possibility that they will grow up and be called names like "whores" (by some unreasonable men) just because, they are no longer virgins. So, tell me why female rape cases shouldn't be given more attention since women experience more devastating effects than men?SMH. We are not arguing on why female rape should be given more attention, we are arguing on why male rape is usually dismissed or never taken seriously. Is the loss of virginity a trauma in itself? ![]() ![]() Would you question why Covid-19 patients are paid more attention to than patients suffering from a slight headache (considering the fact that the former has a more devastating consequences)?We are not arguing on why female rape should be given more attention, we are arguing on why male rape is usually dismissed or never taken seriously. Don't try to be cunning. Male rape can be very traumatic, and that's enough reason to take it seriously. Some things are the way they are, and can never change, because human nature has made it so. So, until men start carrying pregnancy, and their bodies begin to show physical signs when disvirgined, then the society will start to pay more attention to male rape victims.We are not arguing on why female rape should be given more attention, we are arguing on why male rape is usually dismissed or never taken seriously. Should male rape be taken seriously, yes or no? Lastly, you must be living under a rock to state that: "It is unlikely that a parent would do nothing if his/her daughter accused a houseboy/relative of sexual assault". Seriously, you obviously don't know how the average Nigerian parents think or act towards their children(especially the poor ones). Majority are irresponsible and lack parenting skills, and will dismiss claims by their kids of being molested by uncles, fathers, because they consider such scandals as embarrassing.We can agree to disagree. It is unlikely that a parent would do nothing if his/her daughter accused a houseboy/relative of sexual assault. And hey, Busola never spoke up as a teenager because, the backlash she would have received from the public would have been enough to push her to commit suicide. She opened up when she was strong enough to handle the insults and names calling hurled at her. And one of her reasons for speaking up was because, "the pain of a female losing one's virginity to rape never heals".Lol. Perhaps she was wasn't able to handle the insults and name calling a year before she came out. ![]() 1 Like |
Re: Why Do We Ignore Male Rape Cases? by Thelucifer666(m): 4:36pm On May 12, 2020 |
Males get raped, it just isn't taken seriously. Report a man got raped to the police and get laughed at. |
Re: Why Do We Ignore Male Rape Cases? by gRESEARCHER: 7:49pm On May 12, 2020 |
Martinez39s:Boss sorry for replying late. My acct is serving ban for standing up against male rape. I reported it to my mom that our house help used to play with my dick when she's bathing me. Mom didn't believe me. She thought I just dislike the girl. The first day I told her she shouted at me. the second day she flogged me. I kept quiet and didn't tell her again. Later I told dad and immediately he changed our maid to a new one. The second maid didn't do that but has her bad character and was get out. the third maid came when I was 10 or there about and would play porn video tape when my parents are away and would watch while I stay there. she uses goodies to lure me till I became her sex doll. I finger her she romance my dick. i reported her my mom asked her she denied. Could u belive the girl lied that i once told her that am going to lie to my parents against her so that they will sent her away. since then i was given a deaf ear. i stoped reporting because at a point i was taken to church for prayers. the maid and i kept malice and we later became friends and shit started again this time around no reporting and tbh i enjoyed the latter time. Then my cousins came for holidays and I swear my cousins and I had orgy. (2 girls 3 boys, plus a maid not the third maid) I was bleeped in the ass. they used vegetable oil. boss I went through a lot growing up. I am always angry when female rape is given attention to and male ignored. I don't support rape be it male or female 5 Likes 3 Shares |
Re: Why Do We Ignore Male Rape Cases? by gRESEARCHER: 7:54pm On May 12, 2020 |
Kingarthur21:Call it trolling or whatever. I just get angry whenever I see people ignored male rape while giving listening ears to female rape. I'm a victim so I get hurt |
Re: Why Do We Ignore Male Rape Cases? by gRESEARCHER: 7:58pm On May 12, 2020 |
angelfallz:Yeah. she flogged me |
Re: Why Do We Ignore Male Rape Cases? by gRESEARCHER: 7:59pm On May 12, 2020 |
[s] SageMK:[/s]Who told you I don't care about what I'm a victim of? ediot! |
Re: Why Do We Ignore Male Rape Cases? by gRESEARCHER: 8:03pm On May 12, 2020 |
angelfallz:ThanksBoss 2 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Why Do We Ignore Male Rape Cases? by gRESEARCHER: 8:04pm On May 12, 2020 |
Thelucifer666:Exactly. |
Re: Why Do We Ignore Male Rape Cases? by gRESEARCHER: 8:08pm On May 12, 2020 |
AlphaStorm:I saw a news where a female hotel worker took a used condom of a rich guy and inserted it in her vagina then got pregnant. After a while she sued the rich guy for child support and guess what? she won the case. fvck it! |
Re: Why Do We Ignore Male Rape Cases? by gRESEARCHER: 8:21pm On May 12, 2020 |
We4all:So because male have little emotional consequences and have little or no physical consequences, therefore they should be ignored? secondly do the give award for having thread on front page? do you know how many of my threads have hit FP? I was just angry how several threads on this forum concerning male rape never went beyond one page. yet each time a female rape case comes up, the minimum page is always 10. My anger grew wider when I called a female friend to tell her about Jennifer being raped and she abuses her rapists but when I told her about mine how I was abused severally all she did was to laugh and told me it's funny. how is a male rape funny? A mod banned my acct because I stood up against male rape. my posts were taken down because they were posts against male rape. I won't be surprised if the mod is a male |
Re: Why Do We Ignore Male Rape Cases? by callmeRichie(m): 8:21pm On May 12, 2020 |
[quote author=Martinez39s post=89437427] This is not a good reason to sweep male rape under the carpet; in fact, this isn't even why male rape isn't taken too seriously. This doesn't even make any sense. If a female rape victim was discovered to be infertile, will her rape be swept under the carpet? ![]() I love your analysis man! Rape is rape for f*cks sake!!! Why are you folks typing shits up and down?? When does everything becomes gender-based again ![]() Some of you can never just say the fact for once ![]() Go and abused a dude sexually, and have your answer yourself ![]() |
Re: Why Do We Ignore Male Rape Cases? by JONNYSPUTE(m): 8:24pm On May 12, 2020 |
gRESEARCHER:.... One thing I ve learnt in life is to never argue on sensitive issues with a woman. |
Re: Why Do We Ignore Male Rape Cases? by We4all: 9:40pm On May 12, 2020 |
Martinez39s: I said what I said, and we don't have to agree with each other. But one thing I'm certain of is that, 'all your counter arguments are illogical, based on sentiments and wrapped with sarcasm and chauvinism. If you think that a female losing her virginity to rape isn't that much of a big deal, then it's either you're not enlightened or just being outrightly insensitive. And there is a difference between 'getting pregnant on purpose', and being 'forced to'. So, your 'baby mama' counter point is baseless and doesn't hold water. And to think that you brought another dimension to the issues being discussed when you indirectly insinuated that, the 'married victims of rape' who were thrown out of their matrimonial home could have been as a result of them not contributing to the house rent. What a dumb insinuation to make! Seriously, if that is the only counter point you could come up with, then it's pointless trying to make you see reasons. But anyways, I didn't expect less cos you sound like the 'typical African man' whose past time is to belittle women. So, if you like, scream all you want, but be rest assured that cases of male rape will NEVER be taken seriously because the effects rape has on men is nothing compared to what women suffer. Deal with this, and just close the chapter. |
Re: Why Do We Ignore Male Rape Cases? by gRESEARCHER: 10:00pm On May 12, 2020 |
We4all:-- It's a big deal but could this be the reason male rape is thrown out? -- I believe what Martinez39s was trying to say is that the reason why men most likely don't get thrown out of their matrimonial homes is because men own the house either by paying rents or building it themselves. I believe if women start single handedly build or pay rents in their matrimonial homes, we will start seeing men being thrown out of their houses for same reasons. -- I seeeeee.... 1 Like 1 Share |
Re: Why Do We Ignore Male Rape Cases? by Martinez39s(m): 10:03pm On May 12, 2020 |
We4all:We can agree to disagree. If you were that smart, you would never have foolishly said in your first post that male rape is less grievous because males are assumed to be stronger than females, and male rape happens less frequently. If you were smart and honest, you wouldn't have seen these as enough reason not to take male rape seriously. You would, if you were smart and honest, noted that little boys are victims, men can be drugged and raped, men rape men (here, your argument of which gender is physically stronger is redundant), and multiple females could ambush and overpower a man. How then are you the rational and logical one? If you think that a female losing her virginity to rape isn't that much of a big deal, then it's either you're not enlightened or just being outrightly insensitive.Were all female rape victims virgins at the time of rape? You cunningly act like only virgins get raped. Going by your logic, non-virgins who were raped shouldn't get much attention yet that isn't case in reality. Why? Is the possible loss of virginity enough reason not to take male rape seriously at all? And there is a difference between 'getting pregnant on purpose', and being 'forced to'. So, your 'baby mama' counter point is baseless and doesn't hold water.You don't even understand your argument. You claimed rape pregnancy is traumatizing for the female victim because of slut-shaming, I then asked the following: 1) can you show me one women whom everyone knew got pregnant from rape, and was slut-shamed for getting pregnant by rape? 2) who slut-shames pregnant females in an era of baby mamas? And to think that you brought another dimension to the issues being discussed when you indirectly insinuated that, the 'married victims of rape' who were thrown out of their matrimonial home could have been as a result of them not contributing to the house rent.Your don't understand your arguments, and you are not keeping track of them. You don't even comprehend my posts properly. You said married women, unlike men, get thrown out of their home and marriage when they get raped, and I disagreed. I then said that if such does happen (giving you the benefit of doubt), then it is because unlike women, most men are usually the breadwinners of their household, the owner of their houses, and the ones who pay the rent (solely or jointly in rare cases). What a dumb insinuation to make! Seriously, if that is the only counter point you could come up with, then it's pointless trying to make you see reasons. But anyways, I didn't expect less cos you sound like the 'typical African man' whose past time is to belittle women.Cry me a river. So, if you like, scream all you want, but be rest assured that cases of male rape will NEVER be taken seriously because the effects rape has on men is nothing compared to what women suffer. Deal with this, or just close the chapter.All I needed to hear. This emotional declaration reveals who you are on the inside, and it explains why you have been coming up with your unsound argument. Won't be surprised if it's a female behind this moniker. ![]() 2 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Why Do We Ignore Male Rape Cases? by Kobojunkie: 10:04pm On May 12, 2020 |
angelfallz: Male rapes are taken more seriously in western nations than in a place like Nigeria where the prevailing societal culture is still majorly patriarchal. Rape of any kind is considered criminal both in America, and in England -- in fact in most of the western world. This is not about what you read in foreign forums. We are discussing what happens when the criminal system is made aware of many of these cases today. The shift in the western culture from a has begun to shift out in the west , and that is why it is not yet 100% in all places but it is definitely getting there. Thanks majorly to efforts of anti-patriachy movements in the west, the rape of males is now more commonly criminalized, and there has been experienced a shift in culture away from a patriachal extreme, and this has been to the benefit of victims, regardless of gender. angelfallz:Unfortunately the idea was not invented by feminists |
Re: Why Do We Ignore Male Rape Cases? by Kobojunkie: 10:14pm On May 12, 2020 |
angelfallz:Not true. If we are still on Nigeria, a vast majority of rapes, both male and female, do not get their day in court, And again this has to do with the difference in general mentality of the people towards the issue of rape, and in many cases, the gender of the victim in question. |
Re: Why Do We Ignore Male Rape Cases? by gRESEARCHER: 10:14pm On May 12, 2020 |
Martinez39s:We4all is not a female. it's a male. a female's ass-licker. A male mod banned me because I stood up against male rape. A lot of female ass-lickers in the world. |
Re: Why Do We Ignore Male Rape Cases? by Kobojunkie: 10:16pm On May 12, 2020 |
gRESEARCHER:Can you please provide a link to this story cause something does not add up at all. ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() |
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