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I'm Dating HIV Positive Lady & She Is Pregnant. Advice Needed - Romance (11) - Nairaland

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Re: I'm Dating HIV Positive Lady & She Is Pregnant. Advice Needed by sketcherJ(m): 3:34pm On May 12, 2020
Fafesot:

In the first place,I don't see any reason why you would date an HIV+ lady.
You don't know women ,OK..If you were to be in her own shoe ,would she have accepted to date you?.
definitely NO.
My brother ,you think it's easy to manage such a viral disease?..wake up to the fact that there is nothing like unconditional love.
She has sold herself up and down, now she has brought the spoilt body back to you.
what is even love...
face the fact bro

Trust me bro. What OP did is crazy. I can't date am HIV positive lady. But from your comment.. Don't people deserve second chances?
Re: I'm Dating HIV Positive Lady & She Is Pregnant. Advice Needed by andyanders: 3:38pm On May 12, 2020
AFONJACOW:
pallbearers come and dance with this guy , two corpse loading



Don't be surprised that u might die b4 both of them and they end up reading and superving ur burial program.

4 Likes

Re: I'm Dating HIV Positive Lady & She Is Pregnant. Advice Needed by donmik: 3:39pm On May 12, 2020
Don't tell anyone at all apart from your spiritual god-head and your doctor. Nobody can change the status!

Like u don't know that breastfeeding will not harm the baby. Don't fear bro.

Love her as she does to u and keep a holy and happy life with your family.

God does what we can't do for us

Cheer

1 Like

Re: I'm Dating HIV Positive Lady & She Is Pregnant. Advice Needed by vince96w2(m): 3:39pm On May 12, 2020
1StopRudeness:



It’s not something she can hide, especially if the family of the guy are learned folks.... just one visit after they give birth for omugo, they will notice....he should just get ready to handle handle the stigma and backlash
wife's mother comes for omugo...its a choice to breast feed or not.Any ear on his family's part,he won't marry her I bet u.
Re: I'm Dating HIV Positive Lady & She Is Pregnant. Advice Needed by summerflame(m): 3:39pm On May 12, 2020
Fafesot:

In the first place,I don't see any reason why you would date an HIV+ lady.
You don't know women ,OK..If you were to be in her own shoe ,would she have accepted to date you?.
definitely NO.
My brother ,you think it's easy to manage such a viral disease?..wake up to the fact that there is nothing like unconditional love.
She has sold herself up and down, now she has brought the spoilt body back to you.
what is even love...
face the fact bro

someone needs to school you nigga. Not all positives contacted it through sex sir.. be civil for once and think like a normal human being
Re: I'm Dating HIV Positive Lady & She Is Pregnant. Advice Needed by FEGNO: 3:39pm On May 12, 2020
Hmmm. Love is good but what a game of Russian Roulette. Stay safe bro
Re: I'm Dating HIV Positive Lady & She Is Pregnant. Advice Needed by womenareapes: 3:42pm On May 12, 2020
Goddys:
I will say my mind plainly and not pretend like all the above commenters except emyrald91



Why would you have unprotected sex with HIV+ in the name of love even if she has low viral load?


Why entangle your life with unnecessary risks and liabilities because of love?

Do you think she wouldn't walk away if you were the carrier?

I am selfish when it comes to issue like this because it is my default state as a human being.

She didn't disclose it till 7th month when she noticed she had captured your heart.

This is exactly what happens when men don't take redpills, the likes ubunja has been selflessly administering here


I won't advise you. Advise yourself
I adopt you as my son!

if revise is the case that bitch will walk away
Re: I'm Dating HIV Positive Lady & She Is Pregnant. Advice Needed by Homguy(m): 3:48pm On May 12, 2020
Crazeman03:
Hello Nairalanders, Hope you guys are staying Safe. Please don't mind my writing, I will make it short as possible.

I met this wonderful lady Last year and everything has been going good until 7 months ago when she told me she was Hiv+. That hit me hard but that didn't change anything, she was surprised I didnt react and opening up to me didn't scare me because I'm negative though we haven't had sex yet before the moment.

Now it has been 4 months we've been having unprotected sex. I'm not afraid of contracting the virus, as she keeps taking med and her viral load is low. I made sure before we went for test before having unprotected sex. Her CD4 count is above 750 and viral load is below 20, which makes hiv undetectable in her.

Now one night around 3months ago, she woke me up in the middle of the night to ask me, why do I love her knowing fully well about her status because she could not believe she will ever have a relationship with someone negative not even in this Nigeria by the way they stigmatize hiv+ people. I told her the reason and I'm not afraid hiv is not the worse or the baddest of diseases. There are more killer diseases than HIV and HIV is not a diseases but a virus. Only attack your immune system and its no longer a deadly virus.

The problem I have now is that whenever I imagine myself having it and how I will popping drugs everyday, make me kinda moody towards her, because I always keep telling her to always take her drugs. Last night she discovered she is pregnant and I'm just imagining things how everything will play out, I know when she will put to bed she won't be able to breastfeed. People will ask questions. I really need to tell someone in my family but I don't know who. My mom my react and the other person I trust is my younger sister.

On her own part, only her elder sister and brother knew she has the virus. And she had it since 2007.

I only need an advice if I need to tell any member of my family, looking to settle down with her this October.
be a man! You decided to love her without telling anybody, if you want to marry her you do not have to tell anybody shes HIV positive.
I think you are catching cold feet, and are looking for somebody to discourage you from doing what you are scared of.

1 Like

Re: I'm Dating HIV Positive Lady & She Is Pregnant. Advice Needed by JobVacanciesNG: 3:50pm On May 12, 2020
You can get your self placed on PREP that way your chances of getting the virus would be zero.

You don't need to tell anyone her status.

She can as well breastfeed the child without complications
Re: I'm Dating HIV Positive Lady & She Is Pregnant. Advice Needed by ghettochild4u(m): 3:54pm On May 12, 2020
Goddys:
I will say my mind plainly and not pretend like all the above commenters except emyrald91



Why would you have unprotected sex with HIV+ in the name of love even if she has low viral load?


Why entangle your life with unnecessary risks and liabilities because of love?

Do you think she wouldn't walk away if you were the carrier?

I am selfish when it comes to issue like this because it is my default state as a human being.

She didn't disclose it till 7th month when she noticed she had captured your heart.

This is exactly what happens when men don't take redpills, the likes ubunja has been selflessly administering here


I won't advise you. Advise yourself
You are a fool, redpill taker
Re: I'm Dating HIV Positive Lady & She Is Pregnant. Advice Needed by ghettochild4u(m): 3:55pm On May 12, 2020
J111333:
I will say my mind, don't give a damn what anyone thinks. I will dare not start a relationship let alone have unprotected sex with a hiv patient.

Yes she is nice to you now, loves you and all that but believe me, every woman in her shoes will do so too. Humility mostly comes after setback or disgrace. I can bet that if you had met her when she was slaying before contracting the virus, she might not have easily settled for you without messing around like several ladies of her age today. Don't take the humility of an injured lion too seriously my friend.

Well, you already got her pregnant so deal with your issues but wait until you are also cornered by the virus to see her true character.

You are a careless man and I stay far away from your type.
You are a bastard
Re: I'm Dating HIV Positive Lady & She Is Pregnant. Advice Needed by Zakaribin(m): 3:56pm On May 12, 2020
Congratulations man
Re: I'm Dating HIV Positive Lady & She Is Pregnant. Advice Needed by ghettochild4u(m): 3:57pm On May 12, 2020
I can see so much people are still in dark age n not enlightened bout hiv...
Ya all shd change ur mentality...
Take South Africa as a case study...
People are marrying those with hiv and are living positively.. Infact, any hiv person in Nigeria shd inbox me....
I wouldn't mind marrying one
Re: I'm Dating HIV Positive Lady & She Is Pregnant. Advice Needed by Goddys(m): 3:58pm On May 12, 2020
ghettochild4u:

You are a fool, redpill taker


Id1ot, may HIV partner be your portion then since you hate redpill
Re: I'm Dating HIV Positive Lady & She Is Pregnant. Advice Needed by ghettochild4u(m): 4:02pm On May 12, 2020
Goddys:



Id1ot, may HIV partner be your portion then since you hate redpill
At the end of the day, it's unfortunate souls like u that gets hiv...
Keep it up

1 Like

Re: I'm Dating HIV Positive Lady & She Is Pregnant. Advice Needed by KINGreignn: 4:04pm On May 12, 2020
Sadsoulnow:
See question. Somebody is having sexual affair with with HIV positive person you're still asking if he loves her?
No need exchanging comments with a sad soul.
Re: I'm Dating HIV Positive Lady & She Is Pregnant. Advice Needed by Goddys(m): 4:06pm On May 12, 2020
ghettochild4u:

At the end of the day, it's unfortunate souls like u that gets hiv...
Keep it up

Redpill avoider.. Continue in your foolishness until a woman lure you into her infected pvssy cuz of ur sissy attitude. Anuofia
Re: I'm Dating HIV Positive Lady & She Is Pregnant. Advice Needed by ghettochild4u(m): 4:12pm On May 12, 2020
Goddys:


Redpill avoider.. Continue in your foolishness until a woman lure you into her infected pvssy cuz of ur sissy attitude. Anuofia
Idiot... Contnue taking ur red infested pill..
I really don't see why u shd always refers relationship problems or seeking advice as taking redpill.. Mutherfucka
Re: I'm Dating HIV Positive Lady & She Is Pregnant. Advice Needed by Kuddy1010(f): 4:19pm On May 12, 2020
Who said she can't breast feed her baby, the only thing is that she shouldn't mix feed, if she's exclusively breastfeeding her baby and not substituting with breast milk substitutes, your baby will be fine, this thing are usually taught during antenatal clinics, get her registered Asap, then you don't have to tell your extended family about it, she and your baby are your new family now.
Re: I'm Dating HIV Positive Lady & She Is Pregnant. Advice Needed by Roozzaay(m): 4:22pm On May 12, 2020
I pity mama cry cry cry
The only person at loss here is her.
Re: I'm Dating HIV Positive Lady & She Is Pregnant. Advice Needed by Goldie16(f): 4:24pm On May 12, 2020
I know of two people (one in church and one a relative) who doesn't have HIV but their babies refused to suck breast.
Just let her take antibiotics to dry up the breast milk and let it look like breast milk isn't coming at all, pretend complain and go and buy formula.
Trust me, nobody cares.
Re: I'm Dating HIV Positive Lady & She Is Pregnant. Advice Needed by Goldie16(f): 4:31pm On May 12, 2020
Crazeman03:


Mother will be around for Omugwo.
Let her own mum or aunt come instead. That will remove 90% of the problem.
Afterall, in Africa, it's wife's mom that does omugwo.
Re: I'm Dating HIV Positive Lady & She Is Pregnant. Advice Needed by kwamerayban(m): 4:42pm On May 12, 2020
You don't need to tell anyone about your partners' status it's your decision,,, as regards the breastfeeding part, they don't need to know it's HIV that's preventing her from breast feeding,,, as time goes on you find another thing to tell them as the reason why she cannot breastfeed if they keep asking questions. Keep it between you guys, make sure she takes her meds and go for antenatal regularly in a well equipped hospital.

No one needs to know. It's your little secret ��
I don't think it is,,, not all family understand that HIV is not a death sentence,,, they can begin to frustrate the lady and then stigmatization kills faster than HIV
*Thor 2*
[5/12, 1:59 PM] +234 706 884 9568: �
Re: I'm Dating HIV Positive Lady & She Is Pregnant. Advice Needed by sofiscatedmoron: 4:44pm On May 12, 2020
Chai, op, i weep for you, you need to visit yaba left first of all,,
Let me cry for op,,

Re: I'm Dating HIV Positive Lady & She Is Pregnant. Advice Needed by musachara: 4:45pm On May 12, 2020
I logged in my account just to tell you 1 thing. I AM PROUD OF YOU, you are a real man. My advice to you is to follow your heart. Nobody has to know her HIV status, it can remain between the 2 of you. God be with you
Re: I'm Dating HIV Positive Lady & She Is Pregnant. Advice Needed by Donaldoni: 4:54pm On May 12, 2020
summerflame:


someone needs to school you nigga. Not all positives contacted it through sex sir.. be civil for once and think like a normal human being

99% did... embarassed
Re: I'm Dating HIV Positive Lady & She Is Pregnant. Advice Needed by AnthonyAk(m): 4:56pm On May 12, 2020
Its 2020 HIV is not the end if u love her ur good
Re: I'm Dating HIV Positive Lady & She Is Pregnant. Advice Needed by TheBoy1740: 4:56pm On May 12, 2020
Don't tell anyone in your family, you can't handle what will come after. Instead start looking for a breastfeeding excuse, you still have time.
Re: I'm Dating HIV Positive Lady & She Is Pregnant. Advice Needed by Jaspaman: 4:56pm On May 12, 2020
Ningen:
You're building something beautiful here.
Don't throw it to the dogs lest they trample it.

Let's face the facts and be real —
Disclosing her status will generate negativity.

This can sabotage your happiness.

So unless your relatives are understanding folks I don't think it's a brilliant idea at all. Just keep this secret to yourselves and support your wife.

A very good advice.
Re: I'm Dating HIV Positive Lady & She Is Pregnant. Advice Needed by Cmanforall: 5:01pm On May 12, 2020
Crazeman03:


Thanks for the insult. The third I tested since we've been having sex was march and I'm still negative.
Is she taking antiretroviral?

Now, you need to commence that too.

HIV is not a death sentence, but you need to be safe. Visit an HIV center.
Re: I'm Dating HIV Positive Lady & She Is Pregnant. Advice Needed by Adunnee: 5:03pm On May 12, 2020
Crazeman03:
Hello Nairalanders, Hope you guys are staying Safe. Please don't mind my writing, I will make it short as possible.

I met this wonderful lady Last year and everything has been going good until 7 months ago when she told me she was Hiv+. That hit me hard but that didn't change anything, she was surprised I didnt react and opening up to me didn't scare me because I'm negative though we haven't had sex yet before the moment.

Now it has been 4 months we've been having unprotected sex. I'm not afraid of contracting the virus, as she keeps taking med and her viral load is low. I made sure before we went for test before having unprotected sex. Her CD4 count is above 750 and viral load is below 20, which makes hiv undetectable in her.

Now one night around 3months ago, she woke me up in the middle of the night to ask me, why do I love her knowing fully well about her status because she could not believe she will ever have a relationship with someone negative not even in this Nigeria by the way they stigmatize hiv+ people. I told her the reason and I'm not afraid hiv is not the worse or the baddest of diseases. There are more killer diseases than HIV and HIV is not a diseases but a virus. Only attack your immune system and its no longer a deadly virus.

The problem I have now is that whenever I imagine myself having it and how I will popping drugs everyday, make me kinda moody towards her, because I always keep telling her to always take her drugs. Last night she discovered she is pregnant and I'm just imagining things how everything will play out, I know when she will put to bed she won't be able to breastfeed. People will ask questions. I really need to tell someone in my family but I don't know who. My mom my react and the other person I trust is my younger sister.

On her own part, only her elder sister and brother knew she has the virus. And she had it since 2007.

I only need an advice if I need to tell any member of my family, looking to settle down with her this October.

Kudos to you for not discriminating against her despite her status. That said, it is not only HIV positive women that do not breastfeed their children. You and your fiancee should be one. Keep your secrets. Protect her. Your family members do not need to know. The only person who needs to know is her doctor so she can be managed properly during pregnancy. If both of you can afford it, let her have her child outside the country. Otherwise, tell your mum or anyone asking that she can't breastfeed because the doctor advised against it for reasons best known to both of you. I believe you can manage the situation properly if you are truly committed to the relationship. It is well.

1 Like

Re: I'm Dating HIV Positive Lady & She Is Pregnant. Advice Needed by Slimzzy00: 5:05pm On May 12, 2020
I thought there's been a cure for hiv.

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