Re: My Husband's Family Is Sucking Him Dry by hustla(m): 2:43pm On May 19, 2020 |
Anni3e: Hi, I have been married for 9 years now, the problem I have with my husband is that his family members keep sucking him dry and the way he neglects us his immediate family.
He is the first child of 7 children, his siblings even the married ladies keep asking him for money. He keeps spending money on them and their husbands. His brothers keep crying they are broke, they keep leeching off him.
His two junior brothers that always ask him for money, one of them built a house in Port Harcourt and the other one built a big house in the village. Still they won't let him rest.
His married sisters are the worst. If they cough they would call him to send money, every minor thing they would expect money. Just this evening his sister called him to ask for money. We don't have a house of our own, I keep telling my husband to stop giving in to all their demands and invest the money on something, he would say I am turning him against his family.
We have 2 kids and I have told him we need to start saving for their future, I pay the electricity bill, foodstuffs, and most times the children school fees, he pays the house rent and rarely keeps money for home upkeep, he sometimes drops two thousand and that's it for the whole week. He always complains he has no more, but once his family calls him he sends money immediately.
I have saved enough to buy a land and I am not planning to include his name in the property. I don't know what to deal with, his family entitlement mentality or the way he neglects the kids and I and treat us like outsiders.
I am really pissed off and tired.
Sorry for the long post. Please do just that - if you include his name, one day e go sell am to feed in leech family 5 Likes |
Re: My Husband's Family Is Sucking Him Dry by Socialproject: 2:44pm On May 19, 2020 |
Please share this video with him https://www.instagram.com/tv/CAXYHsegvAb/?igshid=1lc91rqv675jAnni3e: Hi, I have been married for 9 years now, the problem I have with my husband is that his family members keep sucking him dry and the way he neglects us his immediate family.
He is the first child of 7 children, his siblings even the married ladies keep asking him for money. He keeps spending money on them and their husbands. His brothers keep crying they are broke, they keep leeching off him.
His two junior brothers that always ask him for money, one of them built a house in Port Harcourt and the other one built a big house in the village. Still they won't let him rest.
His married sisters are the worst. If they cough they would call him to send money, every minor thing they would expect money. Just this evening his sister called him to ask for money. We don't have a house of our own, I keep telling my husband to stop giving in to all their demands and invest the money on something, he would say I am turning him against his family.
We have 2 kids and I have told him we need to start saving for their future, I pay the electricity bill, foodstuffs, and most times the children school fees, he pays the house rent and rarely keeps money for home upkeep, he sometimes drops two thousand and that's it for the whole week. He always complains he has no more, but once his family calls him he sends money immediately.
I have saved enough to buy a land and I am not planning to include his name in the property. I don't know what to deal with, his family entitlement mentality or the way he neglects the kids and I and treat us like outsiders.
I am really pissed off and tired.
Sorry for the long post. 1 Like |
Re: My Husband's Family Is Sucking Him Dry by Ndubuisipaul1: 2:45pm On May 19, 2020 |
adontcare: Such men only regrets in their grave. After everything, they must kill him Aunty e never reach like this now.. Abi you get plan to kill your brother ? Go ahead 1 Like |
Re: My Husband's Family Is Sucking Him Dry by Sailorsoldier1: 2:45pm On May 19, 2020 |
Bluehill1051: Mtcheeew rubbish post. I pray that your husband even die sef! hahahahahahaa....are u for real? |
Re: My Husband's Family Is Sucking Him Dry by Roozzaay(m): 2:45pm On May 19, 2020 |
I would gladly marry devil's cousin if possible than these evil called ladies. God will judge you, i can bet my balls no iota of truth in what you're saying, you're just bitter that you ain't successful in attempts to turn the poor man against his family.... 4 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: My Husband's Family Is Sucking Him Dry by ALABACONNECT(m): 2:46pm On May 19, 2020 |
Many men make this certain mistake. Works both on the part of the wife and husband.
A man is not entitled to help totally his wife's family or his family. Most times the bride family see the husband as a poverty elevation scheme. So wrong A man should always face his own family more. I am not saying he should totally ignore them but he ought let them see that he is out of their immediate circle and needs to put his woman and family as top priority.
I might be getting this message across the wrong way but your wife remains your all. Be on guard. I might be wrong or pass this certain message wrongly but I sure know what I mean. |
Re: My Husband's Family Is Sucking Him Dry by emmanuelno: 2:46pm On May 19, 2020 |
STARGREEN: "I have saved enough to buy a land and I am not planning to include his name in the property."
This is obviously the reason for your lamentations. Lol u spot it on 1 Like |
Re: My Husband's Family Is Sucking Him Dry by opebiboy: 2:47pm On May 19, 2020 |
You are the problem for refusing to stand your ground and drive those blood suckers away |
Re: My Husband's Family Is Sucking Him Dry by Sailorsoldier1: 2:47pm On May 19, 2020 |
Sorry but ur husband needs to do away with them n focus on you and d kids. Tommorrow those ppl he is sending money will mock him if tins go bad. |
Re: My Husband's Family Is Sucking Him Dry by dazzlingd(m): 2:47pm On May 19, 2020 |
Anni3e: Hi, I have been married for 9 years now, the problem I have with my husband is that his family members keep sucking him dry and the way he neglects us his immediate family.
He is the first child of 7 children, his siblings even the married ladies keep asking him for money. He keeps spending money on them and their husbands. His brothers keep crying they are broke, they keep leeching off him.
His two junior brothers that always ask him for money, one of them built a house in Port Harcourt and the other one built a big house in the village. Still they won't let him rest.
His married sisters are the worst. If they cough they would call him to send money, every minor thing they would expect money. Just this evening his sister called him to ask for money. We don't have a house of our own, I keep telling my husband to stop giving in to all their demands and invest the money on something, he would say I am turning him against his family.
We have 2 kids and I have told him we need to start saving for their future, I pay the electricity bill, foodstuffs, and most times the children school fees, he pays the house rent and rarely keeps money for home upkeep, he sometimes drops two thousand and that's it for the whole week. He always complains he has no more, but once his family calls him he sends money immediately.
I have saved enough to buy a land and I am not planning to include his name in the property. I don't know what to deal with, his family entitlement mentality or the way he neglects the kids and I and treat us like outsiders.
I am really pissed off and tired.
Sorry for the long post. Very sad , please ignore anybody that insults u here.... You made a very valid post.. I despise people who leech on others, very bad, and it is so unfortunate your husband has been caught in the trap, he may never progress in life with this attitude. And worst of all, if anything goes wrong, they wont be there to support you and your children. And if your children becomes successful, they will continue with them as well. That sense of entitlement is very bad, your husband needs to man up and let them face their problems, haba....I really feel for u...and I'm sure they will hate u and wage war on you if u seem to come in their way. They are irresponsible and callous. 3 Likes |
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Re: My Husband's Family Is Sucking Him Dry by blowjob: 2:48pm On May 19, 2020 |
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Re: My Husband's Family Is Sucking Him Dry by Muchmore024: 2:49pm On May 19, 2020 |
Anni3e: Hi, I have been married for 9 years now, the problem I have with my husband is that his family members keep sucking him dry and the way he neglects us his immediate family.
He is the first child of 7 children, his siblings even the married ladies keep asking him for money. He keeps spending money on them and their husbands. His brothers keep crying they are broke, they keep leeching off him.
His two junior brothers that always ask him for money, one of them built a house in Port Harcourt and the other one built a big house in the village. Still they won't let him rest.
His married sisters are the worst. If they cough they would call him to send money, every minor thing they would expect money. Just this evening his sister called him to ask for money. We don't have a house of our own, I keep telling my husband to stop giving in to all their demands and invest the money on something, he would say I am turning him against his family.
We have 2 kids and I have told him we need to start saving for their future, I pay the electricity bill, foodstuffs, and most times the children school fees, he pays the house rent and rarely keeps money for home upkeep, he sometimes drops two thousand and that's it for the whole week. He always complains he has no more, but once his family calls him he sends money immediately.
I have saved enough to buy a land and I am not planning to include his name in the property. I don't know what to deal with, his family entitlement mentality or the way he neglects the kids and I and treat us like outsiders.
I am really pissed off and tired.
Sorry for the long post. You have done well..Keep saving, dont include his name in the property you buy..Since it is so glaring that he won't listen to your advise or change anytime soon . I pray they don't send him to early grave |
Re: My Husband's Family Is Sucking Him Dry by sigiyaya(m): 2:49pm On May 19, 2020 |
Anni3e: Hi, I have been married for 9 years now, the problem I have with my husband is that his family members keep sucking him dry and the way he neglects us his immediate family.
He is the first child of 7 children, his siblings even the married ladies keep asking him for money. He keeps spending money on them and their husbands. His brothers keep crying they are broke, they keep leeching off him.
His two junior brothers that always ask him for money, one of them built a house in Port Harcourt and the other one built a big house in the village. Still they won't let him rest.
His married sisters are the worst. If they cough they would call him to send money, every minor thing they would expect money. Just this evening his sister called him to ask for money. We don't have a house of our own, I keep telling my husband to stop giving in to all their demands and invest the money on something, he would say I am turning him against his family.
We have 2 kids and I have told him we need to start saving for their future, I pay the electricity bill, foodstuffs, and most times the children school fees, he pays the house rent and rarely keeps money for home upkeep, he sometimes drops two thousand and that's it for the whole week. He always complains he has no more, but once his family calls him he sends money immediately.
I have saved enough to buy a land and I am not planning to include his name in the property. I don't know what to deal with, his family entitlement mentality or the way he neglects the kids and I and treat us like outsiders.
I am really pissed off and tired.
Sorry for the long post. I am not married but i suffer the same problem as your husband. I am the first child in my family and i spend almost all i earn on my family. My father died when a was young and i see myself as the father of the family and this affects my relationship with my girlfriend whom i am sure i would marry soon. ![cry](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/cry.gif) |
Re: My Husband's Family Is Sucking Him Dry by akanbiaa(m): 2:50pm On May 19, 2020 |
ProfAmaben:
I'm the first born of my family and happily married. I have 4 siblings with one staying with us, there is no indoctrination here, just common sense. I trained my kid bro by buying him an online udemy python programming course for $15, today he's doing well in Lagos, my junior sister is also doing well, I don't dash money but you must use it to acquire a skill After acquiring skills for your siblings and they are faced with some financial setbacks due to low patronage or other issues will you give your siblings cash or abandon them justifying it with the fact that you already empowered them with a skill? 2 Likes |
Re: My Husband's Family Is Sucking Him Dry by leo1234(m): 2:50pm On May 19, 2020 |
bukatyne: Instead of telling your husband to stop 'spending on his family', point him to projects he can spend money on.
E.g. 'My friend said there is one cheap land at Igbo Tutu' or 'how I wish we had our house, we wouldn't be bothered about Baba Mulika asking for rent every year' or 'there is one mutual funds that the entry is N200k and you get 15% returns per year. We can be paying Junior's fees from the interest'. You can also bring up investment for your kids etc.
You know what works with your husband so explore that. Also appreciate him for what he does so far.
@buying your land: I am not a fan of spouses buying stuffs behind each other so I will say deposit the money in mutual benefit/Chapel Hill/Piggybank for now while you try to make him see reason. I particularly don't like the fact you want only your name on the land; recipe for disaster as your husband is not hiding his own funds; he is just not spending it wisely.
Please which mutual fund pays 15% per year?
You should also understand where your husband is coming from: in some cultures, the 'worth' of the first son/husband of the first daughter is their ability to fund everyone's lifestyle without complaint while their own immediate family suffers.
It is a recurring theme so you re-orientate him in love and harmony to see that his family can and will survive without his handouts.
Also note that if he goes 360 and stops funding his siblings, it can cause problems for you'all. Please which mutual fund pays 15% per year ? 1 Like |
Re: My Husband's Family Is Sucking Him Dry by tillaman(m): 2:50pm On May 19, 2020 |
Bluehill1051: Mtcheeew rubbish post. I pray that your husband even die sef! oh please!! Can’t you just ignore if you don’t have anything to say |
Re: My Husband's Family Is Sucking Him Dry by Nackzy: 2:51pm On May 19, 2020 |
Anni3e: Hi, I have been married for 9 years now, the problem I have with my husband is that his family members keep sucking him dry and the way he neglects us his immediate family.
He is the first child of 7 children, his siblings even the married ladies keep asking him for money. He keeps spending money on them and their husbands. His brothers keep crying they are broke, they keep leeching off him.
His two junior brothers that always ask him for money, one of them built a house in Port Harcourt and the other one built a big house in the village. Still they won't let him rest.
His married sisters are the worst. If they cough they would call him to send money, every minor thing they would expect money. Just this evening his sister called him to ask for money. We don't have a house of our own, I keep telling my husband to stop giving in to all their demands and invest the money on something, he would say I am turning him against his family.
We have 2 kids and I have told him we need to start saving for their future, I pay the electricity bill, foodstuffs, and most times the children school fees, he pays the house rent and rarely keeps money for home upkeep, he sometimes drops two thousand and that's it for the whole week. He always complains he has no more, but once his family calls him he sends money immediately.
I have saved enough to buy a land and I am not planning to include his name in the property. I don't know what to deal with, his family entitlement mentality or the way he neglects the kids and I and treat us like outsiders.
I am really pissed off and tired.
Sorry for the long post. Aunty please listen to my advise, Make Sure you save money that can get you a land out up a structure, Everything should be in your name i repeat everything should be in your name, make it look like u want to build a house for people to rent, please don't let any of them know..i mean your husband and his family...Many years later f anything happens Godforbid. You'll come out smiling 2 Likes |
Re: My Husband's Family Is Sucking Him Dry by MistadeRegal(m): 2:51pm On May 19, 2020 |
bukatyne: Instead of telling your husband to stop 'spending on his family', point him to projects he can spend money on.
E.g. 'My friend said there is one cheap land at Igbo Tutu' or 'how I wish we had our house, we wouldn't be bothered about Baba Mulika asking for rent every year' or 'there is one mutual funds that the entry is N200k and you get 15% returns per year. We can be paying Junior's fees from the interest'. You can also bring up investment for your kids etc.
You know what works with your husband so explore that. Also appreciate him for what he does so far.
@buying your land: I am not a fan of spouses buying stuffs behind each other so I will say deposit the money in mutual benefit/Chapel Hill/Piggybank for now while you try to make him see reason. I particularly don't like the fact you want only your name on the land; recipe for disaster as your husband is not hiding his own funds; he is just not spending it wisely.
You should also understand where your husband is coming from: in some cultures, the 'worth' of the first son/husband of the first daughter is their ability to fund everyone's lifestyle without complaint while their own immediate family suffers.
It is a recurring theme so you re-orientate him in love and harmony to see that his family can and will survive without his handouts.
Also note that if he goes 360 and stops funding his siblings, it can cause problems for you'all. Kind of company a man needs…. GOD bless you. |
Re: My Husband's Family Is Sucking Him Dry by michoim(m): 2:51pm On May 19, 2020 |
bukatyne:
Families could be leeches and parasites.
And that picture is horrible. On a moderate note, no family should be label as leeches and parasite because they brought him up in the first place before you now see him as husband material to marry . Though the picture being painted of this man in question is bad...his own is excessive. He must begin to work for his immediate family as well as and take good care of them. 1 Like |
Re: My Husband's Family Is Sucking Him Dry by Reality2015(m): 2:51pm On May 19, 2020 |
Madam, can you make a research to know if not all family that help your husband when he doesn't have anything to call future, maybe if not that your so call husband now you will not near him to date than to marry him, so think well 3 Likes 1 Share |
Re: My Husband's Family Is Sucking Him Dry by bmdmixer: 2:52pm On May 19, 2020 |
Anni3e: Hi, I have been married for 9 years now, the problem I have with my husband is that his family members keep sucking him dry and the way he neglects us his immediate family.
He is the first child of 7 children, his siblings even the married ladies keep asking him for money. He keeps spending money on them and their husbands. His brothers keep crying they are broke, they keep leeching off him.
His two junior brothers that always ask him for money, one of them built a house in Port Harcourt and the other one built a big house in the village. Still they won't let him rest.
His married sisters are the worst. If they cough they would call him to send money, every minor thing they would expect money. Just this evening his sister called him to ask for money. We don't have a house of our own, I keep telling my husband to stop giving in to all their demands and invest the money on something, he would say I am turning him against his family.
We have 2 kids and I have told him we need to start saving for their future, I pay the electricity bill, foodstuffs, and most times the children school fees, he pays the house rent and rarely keeps money for home upkeep, he sometimes drops two thousand and that's it for the whole week. He always complains he has no more, but once his family calls him he sends money immediately.
I have saved enough to buy a land and I am not planning to include his name in the property. I don't know what to deal with, his family entitlement mentality or the way he neglects the kids and I and treat us like outsiders.
I am really pissed off and tired.
Sorry for the long post. buy the land use ur childs name the (older one) let ur husband know but not the children. 1 Like |
Re: My Husband's Family Is Sucking Him Dry by adeniyimam(m): 2:52pm On May 19, 2020 |
Bluehill1051: Mtcheeew rubbish post. I pray that your husband even die sef! A sick fellow ![undecided](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/undecided.png) |
Re: My Husband's Family Is Sucking Him Dry by Adesina18111(m): 2:52pm On May 19, 2020 |
You had better find a way for you and ur kids to survive after his death...na that time u go know say u are just a caretaker madam...those family members will drive u out of his properties 3 Likes |
Re: My Husband's Family Is Sucking Him Dry by Nobody: 2:53pm On May 19, 2020 |
I know someone like this who allows his family to leach on him. I encouraged his wife to find ways to diversify her income. She listened and is better for it today. Since your husband may not wake up from that mode and it's you whose eyes are open, take the initiative and set up a life for yourself and children, if your husbands becomes conscious of himself in later years, fine. |
Re: My Husband's Family Is Sucking Him Dry by NaijaOlosho(f): 2:53pm On May 19, 2020 |
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Re: My Husband's Family Is Sucking Him Dry by promzy555(m): 2:53pm On May 19, 2020 |
Buying a land won't solve the problem, instead you want to cause problem for your self. Someone advise you to engage him on a project. I think is a good advise, think about that very well.
My wife has away of engaging me into buying properties, she will take me there and tell me " Hot let buy this, don't worry, take and add to what you have. And one thing about me, is.. I always want to complete any project I start.
Women, she still find away of collecting her money back. My sister you know your husband weak point, quarrying won't solve anything. |
Re: My Husband's Family Is Sucking Him Dry by Liverpoolfc(m): 2:53pm On May 19, 2020 |
I hate this type of write up. Do you know where they were coming from? Do you know how far they have gone? You are complaining about first son of a family, if he do not take care of them, who will? My wife will not even dare tell me such a thing that my siblings are milking me dry, let them do. 1 Like 2 Shares |
Re: My Husband's Family Is Sucking Him Dry by Nobody: 2:54pm On May 19, 2020 |
OP Why are you complaining? Did he complain to you? Was he being forced? Doesn't he have the will to say no to what doesn't suit him? Isn't he man or is he zombie? E be like say you are the type that don't allow men help their families. 2 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: My Husband's Family Is Sucking Him Dry by Yabaleft: 2:55pm On May 19, 2020 |
Anni3e: I am not buying behind his back, I would tell him but I am not including his name. Do you know how many times I have told him to buy a land and start a project. He won't, he prefers spending all the money on his siblings. Seems your husband is the type yoruba people call " adanile, ma da nita" Pardon my bad yoruba abeg. |
Re: My Husband's Family Is Sucking Him Dry by ModestGal(f): 2:55pm On May 19, 2020 |
Anni3e: Hi, I have been married for 9 years now, the problem I have with my husband is that his family members keep sucking him dry and the way he neglects us his immediate family.
He is the first child of 7 children, his siblings even the married ladies keep asking him for money. He keeps spending money on them and their husbands. His brothers keep crying they are broke, they keep leeching off him.
His two junior brothers that always ask him for money, one of them built a house in Port Harcourt and the other one built a big house in the village. Still they won't let him rest.
His married sisters are the worst. If they cough they would call him to send money, every minor thing they would expect money. Just this evening his sister called him to ask for money. We don't have a house of our own, I keep telling my husband to stop giving in to all their demands and invest the money on something, he would say I am turning him against his family.
We have 2 kids and I have told him we need to start saving for their future, I pay the electricity bill, foodstuffs, and most times the children school fees, he pays the house rent and rarely keeps money for home upkeep, he sometimes drops two thousand and that's it for the whole week. He always complains he has no more, but once his family calls him he sends money immediately.
I have saved enough to buy a land and I am not planning to include his name in the property. I don't know what to deal with, his family entitlement mentality or the way he neglects the kids and I and treat us like outsiders.
I am really pissed off and tired.
Sorry for the long post. In this 21st century, you still asking if you should include his name or not? If you like, include his name, let him die, maybe his family members won't claim the land is for their brother. But don't come here to tell us how you bought land and how your husband family snatch it away. You are busy funding the house and yet you want him to be responsible? No, men won't be responsible unless they see what to be responsible for. If you like, don't abandon some house expenses for him and keep asking Some women sha, they are the reason why males see us as idiots, because their ego is fuelled when they enslave themselves. You are in slavery sister, and nothing is mutual in your marriage, you are carrying the higher responsibility. Abi no be you get pregnant, and breastfeed? How much would he pay for surrogate mother? And yet you still join him in paying for the bills. Mtchew 3 Likes |
Re: My Husband's Family Is Sucking Him Dry by airminem(f): 2:55pm On May 19, 2020 |
elektra:
I knew it. SMDH.
![wink](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/wink.png) Sometimes, NOTHING NEEDS TO BE SAID ATALL. SMDHT |