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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Romance / 3 Weeks To Wedding & I'm Confused! Please Advise Me (121028 Views)
Lady Dumps Man For White Man Few Weeks To Wedding (Photo) / Few Weeks To Wedding....text Message Discovered. / Man Caught His Fiancee In Bed With His Best Man 3 Weeks To Wedding (2) (3) (4)
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3 Weeks To Wedding & I'm Confused! Please Advise Me by Donbabaj: 10:13pm On May 25, 2020 |
I could be happy now but the next minute, she changes mood all of a sudden. We dated for over year after someone match make us but this mood swing things continued overtime so sometimes I get confused even as i really tried managing the pressure. She's a nice girl, takes good care of me, buys clothes, cooks, always wants me to look good but the problem is the rate which she switches mood easily. Financially, we are both average earner but I think she earns better pay than me. For instance, recently we got a new apartment - 2bedroom flat but whenever I say something she doesn't like or she doesn't want to hear, she just reacts like why would I say such a thing. All the while we were dating, we never stayed with each other as we stayed in our parents house. Fast forward* most times, as the man, after switching mood, I try to pacify her by petting and apologising but she doesn't just want to listen. Just today, we were playing with each other on the bed, touching each other (not sensitive part) and she wanted me to kiss her. So I told her jokingly that "but you know this is not biblical" as an advocate of no sex until after marriage. I have never had sex with her either. The next thing she said, "why are you talking like this" she stood up, went straight to the sitting room and slept there. I went to meet her there to pacify her again but she wouldn't listen. Please note that I have not and can never beat or abuse her cos I'm a Christian. I'm just tired. She's really getting on my nerves. Our wedding is 3 weeks time but I dont just know what to do. People, friends and family are already aware of the impending marriage but I'm afraid that if a lady can switch mood like this, who knows what will happen tommorrow. I cant sleep in peace... Please advice. This is happening right now. 154 Likes 12 Shares |
Re: 3 Weeks To Wedding & I'm Confused! Please Advise Me by dingbang(m): 10:15pm On May 25, 2020 |
You sef.. But you were touching her and you didn't tell yourself it wasnt biblical too abi. 1446 Likes 66 Shares |
Re: 3 Weeks To Wedding & I'm Confused! Please Advise Me by Ningen(m): 10:18pm On May 25, 2020 |
Do not bail on her for this. ![]() Her “mood swings” aren't even exaggerated. It's very mild and subtle. With good communication and effort from both parties, it can be managed. Guy, I can tell she's also sexually frustrated. Vitamin D is important for her mental health. Once you've seal it off, dominate that “swing”. 507 Likes 23 Shares |
Re: 3 Weeks To Wedding & I'm Confused! Please Advise Me by Donbabaj: 10:18pm On May 25, 2020 |
dingbang: You know at times you just want to please these ladies at times and give them attention. But not with my faith. 58 Likes 5 Shares |
Re: 3 Weeks To Wedding & I'm Confused! Please Advise Me by DanseMacabre(m): 10:19pm On May 25, 2020 |
I hope she won't find out in the next three weeks that you're a one minute man. Anyway to be honest with you the way things are going there is every likelihood of it ending in tears. 388 Likes 27 Shares |
Re: 3 Weeks To Wedding & I'm Confused! Please Advise Me by dingbang(m): 10:22pm On May 25, 2020 |
Donbabaj:I just doubt she will remain faithful because she is sexually active and will collect dk from outside. 116 Likes 8 Shares |
Re: 3 Weeks To Wedding & I'm Confused! Please Advise Me by Nobody: 10:22pm On May 25, 2020 |
Op If I were u I will give her good sex that's obviously what she needs. Forget all this biblical talks, be a man for once and act as one. Na Hard F*ck she need! 303 Likes 14 Shares |
Re: 3 Weeks To Wedding & I'm Confused! Please Advise Me by Oluromantic: 10:25pm On May 25, 2020 |
Youre abt to marry a mel-chlor or san-mel. Apart from mood swings, they want admiration badly and they get easily angry if not admired. I once dated a girl like that before, I was the one who by myself told her we're not compatible, cus I couldn't cope. She ranted when I told her, abused me and my parents blabla but I felt free like I was caged before. That's me though, you may be able to cope. We're different. By nature, they lack moderate feelings, emotional independence and stability...that's their weakness. It's usually from one extreme of emotions to the other extreme skipping moderation and balance in-between. At one time, they'll love you like babies, like all their life depend on you. Another time, they'll show serious temper over little things. Either you date for marriage or there's nothing between both of you. No ordinary friendly plays or so at all except birthed by emotions. If you beat her often in a ludo or whot game na wahala. If you decide to be passive abt her swings, she may leave for her parents or friend house for being ignored and that'll be embarrassing. But their strength is being supportive, they can give u their all or even indebt themselves for you in loves name. If you know u can't cope, you still have time to decide. Forget about family.. only 2 of you'll live together as man n wife. Forget the general conclusion that women are emotional..little things upset them blabla. It's when they want to be selfish they say all that. Not all women are emotional dilly-dallys. Though emotional, some are sensible with their emotions. I'm not wishing you separation at d edge of ur wedding but the truth need be told. You need to be very emotionally balanced and independent on your own to keep her going. If you are, then you can cope, but if you're not, hmmmm... 397 Likes 32 Shares |
Re: 3 Weeks To Wedding & I'm Confused! Please Advise Me by Donbabaj: 10:25pm On May 25, 2020 |
DanseMacabre: I'm not a 1 minute man. Cos before I rededicated my life to christ. I have had flings with 2 different ladies which I told her and coupled with I did a medical check up recently and was treated of only infection which I told her. 41 Likes 3 Shares |
Re: 3 Weeks To Wedding & I'm Confused! Please Advise Me by Bola146(f): 10:30pm On May 25, 2020 |
Red flag from the lady. You better sit her down and talk sense to her 68 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: 3 Weeks To Wedding & I'm Confused! Please Advise Me by Naija246: 10:30pm On May 25, 2020 |
Women are economically better to rent than buy. Don't marry that lady. Don't say I didn't warn you ![]() 80 Likes 9 Shares |
Re: 3 Weeks To Wedding & I'm Confused! Please Advise Me by Donbabaj: 10:32pm On May 25, 2020 |
dingbang: From my observations I dont think she is, she claimed not to. She has had only one heart break in the past where a guy jilted her and she told me. I have had cause to investigate from a friend in her office but they all said she is just a tough lady but very hard to get. Guys have tried her but couldn't get her. 9 Likes 1 Share |
Re: 3 Weeks To Wedding & I'm Confused! Please Advise Me by Okoroawusa: 10:32pm On May 25, 2020 |
It's like two of you are confused about what you both want. 56 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: 3 Weeks To Wedding & I'm Confused! Please Advise Me by Sisijetue(f): 10:32pm On May 25, 2020 |
Did you just wake up from your slumber ![]() 14 Likes 1 Share |
Re: 3 Weeks To Wedding & I'm Confused! Please Advise Me by Sisijetue(f): 10:33pm On May 25, 2020 |
Shalaye FC ![]() Donbabaj: 62 Likes 5 Shares |
Re: 3 Weeks To Wedding & I'm Confused! Please Advise Me by Donbabaj: 10:34pm On May 25, 2020 |
Bola146: @Bola146, I think so too. We have had long discussions after disagreement but laslas I will still be the one to apologise. 4 Likes |
Re: 3 Weeks To Wedding & I'm Confused! Please Advise Me by Donbabaj: 10:36pm On May 25, 2020 |
Re: 3 Weeks To Wedding & I'm Confused! Please Advise Me by OBTMOS(m): 10:37pm On May 25, 2020 |
Na this kind one the make front page |
Re: 3 Weeks To Wedding & I'm Confused! Please Advise Me by CaptainStephen(m): 10:38pm On May 25, 2020 |
I think you need more time to know one another better. That way you understand each other better off even through real character will show after marriage ![]() 11 Likes |
Re: 3 Weeks To Wedding & I'm Confused! Please Advise Me by OBTMOS(m): 10:38pm On May 25, 2020 |
Front page things |
Re: 3 Weeks To Wedding & I'm Confused! Please Advise Me by tyup(m): 10:39pm On May 25, 2020 |
Donbabaj: Nothing annoys me more than weaklings like you who always go pacify a lady after every disagreement either ur at fault or she is That's an outrageous mumuish attitude from you...shit u should have ur pride From my predictions she would one day disgrace and embarrass you Publicly n you'll still be the one to beg n this would continue for a very Loooong time till u get frustrated n shattered and she wouldn't care 110 Likes 7 Shares |
Re: 3 Weeks To Wedding & I'm Confused! Please Advise Me by Nobody: 10:45pm On May 25, 2020 |
I think you are over reacting. You want to marry a lady you don't want her to know if your kokoroko can dribble like maradona and you expect her not to be tense or swinging moods.Common no one is asking you to have sex before marriage just do the usually touchy touchy like french kissing which is quite enjoyable and let her give you a B.J that reset your brain...Biko do the needful because you still kind of a suspect to her.Most ladies feel insecure when you are not making the move on them and trust me it is embrassing when they have to report your case to other men. 27 Likes 1 Share |
Re: 3 Weeks To Wedding & I'm Confused! Please Advise Me by xxxtedyxxx(m): 10:45pm On May 25, 2020 |
Stop falling for her mood swings. A woman won't respect you if she knows what she does affects you in some way. Be passive. Stop reacting to her mood swings. In addition. Your babe needs betta kpanshing... Keep that bible/Christianity stuff aside. Flog her now, or another guy outside will flogg her for you. By the way...have you read this story...? 28 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: 3 Weeks To Wedding & I'm Confused! Please Advise Me by MrBrownJay1(m): 10:46pm On May 25, 2020 |
Donbabaj: three weeks from wedding, only now you are trying to fix such a huge issue... you better get to the bottom of what is bothering her, because it can only get worse after wedding, so beware.... i suggest you sit her down and ask her directly:" babe, i can see that you have a temper issue, and at the slightest issue that you dont like, you are exploding. it is difficult to understand you and i certainly dont want us to get married with such a huge issue. please let me know what is "really" bothering you so that we can find a solution. so, IS THERE SOMETHING YOU WANNA TELL ME?!?!?!" btw if you always try to pacify her when you know you havent done anything wrong, then part of the problem is YOU... you certainly shouldnt try to pacify her when you know very well you havent done anything wrong. let her come clean with whats bothering her mind. 104 Likes 8 Shares |
Re: 3 Weeks To Wedding & I'm Confused! Please Advise Me by Donbabaj: 10:47pm On May 25, 2020 |
tyup: For the one year we have dated she never for once. I mean for once embarrased me. She respects me in public. My only problem is the way she switches her mood. She just go into her shell and avoid any communication. I've talked to her mildly but this keeps repeating itself. 3 Likes 1 Share |
Re: 3 Weeks To Wedding & I'm Confused! Please Advise Me by chatinent: 10:47pm On May 25, 2020 |
You both are on the 'bed' and are 'touching' but no sensitive parts as an advocate of bla bla. So you mean you were touching toes right? And who told you it's Christian to live together with sb you are yet to be married with? . The problem is you don't know what rules and principles you keep. 141 Likes 10 Shares |
Re: 3 Weeks To Wedding & I'm Confused! Please Advise Me by Nobody: 10:48pm On May 25, 2020 |
Donbabaj: You are not yet married and she is displaying these mood swings already. Do you think you will be able to control her once you get married? I laugh. You guys think marriage is a joke. Dude if you are having second thoughts this is the best time to back out. Marriage is not something you have to endure. 27 Likes 1 Share |
Re: 3 Weeks To Wedding & I'm Confused! Please Advise Me by Donbabaj: 10:50pm On May 25, 2020 |
xxxtedyxxx: I'm sorry I cant, if I wanted to sex her would have done that a long time. I understand guys are not the same. 18 Likes |
Re: 3 Weeks To Wedding & I'm Confused! Please Advise Me by tyup(m): 10:53pm On May 25, 2020 |
Donbabaj: That's why I said it's a prediction...might not happen now as things change in a surprise Giffy after marriage well you want that to stop right? Man up and don't go to pacify her after any mood swing even if it means u guys don't talk for weeks trust me I'm not the wicked typa guy but if I'm the one ur Wife to be would learn how to control her mood swings when it comes to my side. She knows you'll always be the one to beg that's why she got so much Ego and would always switch mood at will But when she doesn't get what she wants her head will get normal PLUS I'll advice you fix this bfr wedding her to avoid stories that touch 14 Likes |
Re: 3 Weeks To Wedding & I'm Confused! Please Advise Me by Righteousness89(m): 10:56pm On May 25, 2020 |
As a Christian, which you say you are, Did you Hear from GOD in any way about her being your wife or you just relied on your own feelings or her appearance and all that? There is Much More to Marriage than Good sex and all that "I Love you" You have to be Compatible Spirtually First and then Physically My Advice to anyone is this; If you were not led to your Spouse , don't go in! Marriage is a One time thing for us who Claim we follow GOD! GOD is not Committed to where he didn't send you to.. ( My personal Experience) If you have no Divine connection to her, move away now! A Failed Courtship is Better Than a Failed Marriage! 60 Likes 6 Shares |
Re: 3 Weeks To Wedding & I'm Confused! Please Advise Me by Donbabaj: 10:56pm On May 25, 2020 |
chatinent: Correct. I tried to avoid this but you know ladies always inquisitive. In fact, truth be told, we had a romance, but not sex. I had to tell her why cant we just wait for few weeks but that apart, the major thing is the way she switches whenever I tell her the hard truth. At times she listens and adjust. I even gat to tell her that if shes using a reverse psychology for me. Although, sometimes I stand my ground but more often than not I apologise. 4 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: 3 Weeks To Wedding & I'm Confused! Please Advise Me by EzeNdiAra: 10:56pm On May 25, 2020 |
[s] tyup:[/s] Carry this your Sokoto mentality go Arewa topic. We're not discussing people who marry 4 wives and even have spare wive 39 Likes 2 Shares |
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