I have been married for 9 yrs now.I earn more than my husband, so i settle most of the bills while he supports. Some body called me last month and informed me that a lady in the village gave birth to a child for my husband and his family has gone to bring the girl to my husband house in the village. I couldnt believe it because he has been faithful, so i thought. I went to the village and confirmed the story to be true.When i asked him the reason for his actions, he said it was excessive pressure from his family to marry a 2nd wife because iam not their tribe though we are from the same state. I have had 3 miscarriages and 2 still birth @8 months, God in his mercies gave me a child last year. When this incidence happened, Close family members told me that the attack on my child bearing is from the family because they dont want me to bear fruits in their family. No bride price has been paid on this village girl who has a child for my husband but the lady is living with his family in the village. My husband said he wants to collect the child, he is not interested in marrying the girl. We love each other so much before now and have not had any major issues before now. Pls sincere advice no insults, am so confused right now.

Pls give yourself peace of my mind.At least you have a reason to be happy.God knew what would happen in future thats why he gave you your own child.imagine that all this happened when you were childless.madam feel comfortable in your house,take care if your child,face your work and dont let the situation weight you down.your inlaws want you to leave yourhome on your own.dont give them the opportunity to rejoice over you.

It may be difficult but take care of your husband more than before.make sure you have a happy home that will make your enemies cry.


if your husband brings the baby home,its your win because it means you have another child without the stress of pregnancy and pains of labour.Be strong,your enemies shall never rejoice over you in jesus name.AMEN.

Betrayal!

If he could do this without your knowledge, there are still some shocking truths yet to be revealed! Brace yourself!

Too bad but you have to forgive him .

saphireadoo:
My husband said he wants to collect the child, he is not interested in marrying the girl.

But he was interested in sleeping with her, no insults ma, but your husband is simply wicked.
He might also poison you one day if his family asks for it.
Your husband did what he did cause he knows at the end of the day, you will still forgive him and take care of his love child.

Pressurize ko, I guess they they forced his d*ck into the girl's vagina.

dz ur husband is very heartless.

he is aware of everything (from day 1).

he is just with u because of material relief.

I'll advice u divorce him now (while u are still capable) and start a new life without him

Don't tell me that you don't have ethic of conviction - if you don't stand for something, you'll fall for anything. Give him an overdose of the treatment you've reserved for perfidious people in your life, because as the possible closest person to you all this while he must have received the largest portion of your goodness too - if his action is a retaliatory one, however, you're on your own.

Your husband is a weak clown being orchestrated by his family, this is a lot.

And I wonder if it's your money he expects to support this new child with

What if you had a child for another man in your matrimonial home?
Would you be in that house typing this now?


Sorry but you married a simp
Okay bye

If you need a second husband, I dey for you.

Pressure from the family to have a second wife.. pure lie and excuse to cheat

No bride price has been paid on this village girl who has a child for my husband but the lady is living with his family in the village. My husband said he wants to collect the child, he is not interested in marrying the girl.

You don't need advice because you've made a decision already. You just want assurance from strangers that your “wifey” status isn't threaten.

Well, stop living in delusion.
You're now in a polygamous marriage.

That village girl will give birth again and again. She has been accepted by his family while you are an outcast. What more, the cloud of betrayal will hover over your union; hate will replace love.

Best decision is to quit. But I wish you the best.

saphireadoo:
I have been married for 9 yrs now.I earn more than my husband, so i settle most of the bills while he supports. Some body called me last month and informed me that a lady in the village gave birth to a child for my husband and his family has gone to bring the girl to my husband house in the village. I couldnt believe it because he has been faithful, so i thought. I went to the village and confirmed the story to be true.When i asked him the reason for his actions, he said it was excessive pressure from his family to marry a 2nd wife because iam not their tribe though we are from the same state. I have had 3 miscarriages and 2 still birth @8 months, God in his mercies gave me a child last year. When this incidence happened, Close family members told me that the attack on my child bearing is from the family because they dont want me to bear fruits in their family. No bride price has been paid on this village girl who has a child for my husband but the lady is living with his family in the village. My husband said he wants to collect the child, he is not interested in marrying the girl. We love each other so much before now and have not had any major issues before now. Pls sincere advice no insults, am so confused right now.

Fix the first bolded! Allow a man be a man and you won’t have too many problems to worry about as a woman! Be ready to accept more love child from your husband! Men will forever embarrass you!

Biancah:
But he was interested in sleeping with her, no insults ma, but your husband is simply wicked.
He might also poison you one day if his family asks for it.
Your husband did what he did cause he knows at the end of the day, you will still forgive him and take care of his love child.

Pressurize ko, I guess they they forced his d*ck into the girl's vagina.

I wonder oh.....



@OP


Your husband isn't a man enough to make his decisions? There is nothing like family pressure.... Any man who is influence by his family talks is a weak man... Because he's the only one that knows his home and he had the right to agree and disagree to whatever will bring shame to his wife and kids.....

Some Nigerian men will embarrass you. Smh.

saphireadoo:
I have been married for 9 yrs now.I earn more than my husband, so i settle most of the bills while he supports. Some body called me last month and informed me that a lady in the village gave birth to a child for my husband and his family has gone to bring the girl to my husband house in the village. I couldnt believe it because he has been faithful, so i thought. I went to the village and confirmed the story to be true.When i asked him the reason for his actions, he said it was excessive pressure from his family to marry a 2nd wife because iam not their tribe though we are from the same state. I have had 3 miscarriages and 2 still birth @8 months, God in his mercies gave me a child last year. When this incidence happened, Close family members told me that the attack on my child bearing is from the family because they dont want me to bear fruits in their family. No bride price has been paid on this village girl who has a child for my husband but the lady is living with his family in the village. My husband said he wants to collect the child, he is not interested in marrying the girl. We love each other so much before now and have not had any major issues before now. Pls sincere advice no insults, am so confused right now.

Your husband decided to marry a 2nd wife (forget they haven't paid her bride price ish) because you are not from their tribe.

Now same husband doesn't want the 2nd wife but wants the child.

Is it a child he was looking for because you guys had delays or is he still going to succumb to their pressure for a 2nd wife from their tribe?

If the latter, then he is still going to get the 2nd wife they desire.

You need a lot of clarity right now so you are not investing in a dream or burying your head in the sand especially if you do not want a polygamous marriage.

Engage again prayerfully and logically so you know if you are going to waka or stay.

I wish you all the best.

When I get married and my husband dare such(God forbids),i will leave him and never look back.I can't stand such betrayal and whatever love I may have for him will be instantly gone.Nonsense all because of sex.

[my candid advice is for you to be tolerant since u said he has not done to u before.


If u know h still pays attention to you and shows u love then accept the child as your own.

Remember we all will die here one day so no need to kill oneself because of anytin.

I hope you meditate on these words and stay with him for better or for worse.

Stay strong.










quote author=saphireadoo post=90160841]I have been married for 9 yrs now.I earn more than my husband, so i settle most of the bills while he supports. Some body called me last month and informed me that a lady in the village gave birth to a child for my husband and his family has gone to bring the girl to my husband house in the village. I couldnt believe it because he has been faithful, so i thought. I went to the village and confirmed the story to be true.When i asked him the reason for his actions, he said it was excessive pressure from his family to marry a 2nd wife because iam not their tribe though we are from the same state. I have had 3 miscarriages and 2 still birth @8 months, God in his mercies gave me a child last year. When this incidence happened, Close family members told me that the attack on my child bearing is from the family because they dont want me to bear fruits in their family. No bride price has been paid on this village girl who has a child for my husband but the lady is living with his family in the village. My husband said he wants to collect the child, he is not interested in marrying the girl. We love each other so much before now and have not had any major issues before now. Pls sincere advice no insults, am so confused right now.[/quote]

Haba dear you don't need to be so rash... The deed has been done.

If he still gives her attention and love she should stay but if he becomes something else she should flee.

We humans are different and our response to family pressures differs .

Happy sunday










quote author=Biancah post=90161637] But he was interested in sleeping with her, no insults ma, but your husband is simply wicked.
He might also poison you one day if his family asks for it.
Your husband did what he did cause he knows at the end of the day, you will still forgive him and take care of his love child.

Pressurize ko, I guess they they forced his d*ck into the girl's vagina.[/quote]

[

You be the one to suffer it more at the long run....you think its easy to be a second hand when there are fresh young girls around.

You better have rethink and pray you don't experience such.

You thought marriage is boy friend girl friend thing.










quote author=Rozz post=90163637]When I get married and my husband dare such(God forbids),i will leave him and never look back.I can't stand such betrayal and whatever love I may have for him will be instantly gone.Nonsense all because of sex. [/quote]

Rawhumper:
[

You be the one to suffer it more at the long run....you think its easy to be a second hand when there are fresh young girls around.

You better have rethink and pray you don't experience such.

You thought marriage is boy friend girl friend thing.










quote author=Rozz post=90163637]When I get married and my husband dare such(God forbids),i will leave him and never look back.I can't stand such betrayal and whatever love I may have for him will be instantly gone.Nonsense all because of sex.

will not marry such husband sef, so it's never going to happen

Ma'am d did has been done..d ball is now in ur court...
My own advice is as far ur hubby is remorseful and treating u well...please don't loose ur home to a village girl oo.
You still his rightful wife..he paid ur bride price also u went through a lot for him.


Just becareful..okay..

Rozz:
will not marry such husband sef, so it's never going to happen

Funny you..I pray it never happen..
It's only a saint and a disciplined man that don't get messed up this days..
Most men at least ones in there lifetime think with there penis..it's those that are unlucky dat get tangled with preg shii..

This is the height of betrayal and irks me that he is hiding under the guise of pressure from his family. He seems interested in the new lady and would never defend you before his family. Take your time to think through it and follow your heart and not what anyone says.

ultimateyankee:
Too bad but you have to forgive him .

Because?

mayorkay1996:


Funny you..I pray it never happen..
It's only a saint and a disciplined man that don't get messed up this days..
Most men at least ones in there lifetime think with there penis..it's those that are unlucky dat get tangled with preg shii..

yes,i will marry a saint and disciplined man

My sister, I am really sorry for what has happened. There is a lot at stake here.

Your husband said he had a lot of pressure from his family to get a 2nd wife for whatever reason. It goes to show that he is NOT mature enough to be your husband.

Secondly, if you forgive him and bring the baby in. Can you cope with the situation? Feeding, clothing, medical bills, schooling. If you can, go ahead but what makes you think he will not fall for another girl again from his village.

Please, start having personal savings over time in case your husband turns out to be who you do not expect. You may involve your parents at this stage to discuss with his parents on the way out. This is really embarrassing, but you need to watch his behavior from now on.

You must get concerned anytime he wants to travel alone if you still want to continue living as a couple.

The Lord is your strength.

Ur husband is a mummy' boy for giving in 2 family pressure. u can force a man 2 d stream buh cant force him 2 drink.In other words, ur husband is fully aware of his action, cos is a man' world he feels he can do anything nd get away with it.All u need 2 do is 2 forgive him nd kno dat u re alone in dis kind of marriage, take care of urself nd plan ahead 4 d future cos u never might kno wats next


dont dull urself

Meaning he doesn't have a mind of his own or what? How can his family influence him for something he doesn't want to do?

Are you sure he's not with you because you are the breadwinner? If he hammers today, will he stay with you?

ImaIma1:
Meaning he doesn't have a mind of his own or what? How can his family influence him for something he doesn't want to do?

Are you sure he's not with you because you are the breadwinner? If he hammers today, will he stay with you?

If he were the breadwinner I have a feeling that the tone of the OP would be completely different and things would've been handled a lot more forcefully by he and his family

Very funny story, imagine feeding someone and he uses the energy to impregnate someone else.

ImaIma1:
Meaning he doesn't have a mind of his own or what? How can his family influence him for something he doesn't want to do?

Are you sure he's not with you because you are the breadwinner? If he hammers today, will he stay with you?