Chachangi:
You should strike a balance between minding your business and keeping a sane and safe world.

We were minding our business until corona came from China to everyone and the story changed.

The world is a global village. As Africans we live a communal life, though that is being mordernized.

We need to think of the knock on effects of our actions. If the girl becomes frustrated and misbehaves and does something drastic. I doubt if anyone here on Nairaland will be affected but you will be affected to some extent.

Please, do what you can to help her but be sure you and your family are safe.

Pray to God to guide you.

I like your way of thinking. People sit at the comfort of their home and dish advice to people without putting themselves in the shoes and assume if it was their situation. Minding business is good if the after effect of the business has no negative nor positive impact in us.
But when the business has side effects on a long run then it is best We get involved to the extent we can and tackle it.

OritaIbadan:

Alright just thinking as a father is it the best

You can never be her father and she surely never see you as one

MoodyQueen:
She'll appreciate you if you mind your business.

She never mind her business when she used the Op's phone to Facebook

She's fvcking 5 different guys? Na wa oh. That means this innocent girl that I'm eyeing right now is probably swimming in 12 guys semen at any given point. Na wa ohh.

OritaIbadan:
I employed this 21years old lady last year as a sales rep. At resumption to work she appeard so decent and godly always With her Bible and Sunday school manual. I was really impressed by her spiritual and respectful nature. This made me treat her different from others. I buy her things and sometimes gives her money and always discuss her good life style with my wife. But what amazed me was that my wife was so indifferent about her each time I discuss her my wife will quickly change the topic. I thought, well woman with their naughty behavior towards other women.

Fast forward to June first this year her phone was stolen and I have a phone in office that I allow them access to incase their phone is off I can easily reach them through it. This faithful day, I tried to access my Facebook account using the office phone and found out that this same lady had used it but forget to logout. Well, I knew it was wrong to check her inbox but all the same I did.

After checking her inbox I couldn't sleep all night. I found out that she is having unprotected sex with 5 guys each guy per Sunday and she just did an abortion March this year the very day she told me that she was sick and can't make it to work and she wasn't sure who among the guys that impregnated her. I also found out that she had missed her period again and trying to hang it on one of the boys. The amazing thing is that non of these guys suspects her, they all believe she is a faithful girl friend.

I have thought of relieving her of her job, but my wife is asking me what should I give as reasons. But the truth is that I had never winessed such a wayward life before. If I pretend as though I know nothing she will eventually commit another abortion and continue with such life which is very dangerous at her age. What if she is my own daughter?

Please I want the mode to push this to the front page. I want to seek others opnion about it

It's amazing to read "It's none of your business" comments all over here.

This world has little or no future left.

While nobody is saying poking into the phone is right, the nay sayers here have forgotten that you said this phone isn't hers by the way.

You might ordinarily not have gotten any reason to go looking into her personal phone, but for the earlier expressed reason that it's the office phone.

Before she dies in your office with her lifestyle, you had better sack her.

If you do not have any attraction already with her, you can declare how you got the information from the phone without any apology.

It's your office, your office phone and you are responsible to some extent for the safety of your workers.

ok o

Bennysam:

What I’m saying is for him to find a way and talk to her that’s all my friend, because I believe there’s a reason why he see that message

LastProphet:


Is none of your business because she has not invited you into her private life you only violated it. Did you employ her to be daddy's daughter or sales girl? I suspect you are interested in her

Sack her now..

Let's see if her private life will put food on her table!! Nonsense!!!

Holier than thou that is sexing 5 different guys+ Abortion

OP is dealing with a Chameleon!!!

Amotolongbo:
[s]We should learn how to separate business from personal life.She is your sales girl, relate with her strictly on business and show less concern on her personal life.The way I’m reading your message, there is already a growing emotion in you already towards the girl, the reason you felt so highly disappointed and wanna lay her off, not because she is underperforming but the way she chose to live her life, which should be less of your concern.In as much she is performing her responsibilities to your satisfaction and not using her “wayward” life to affect your business like she did the first time she went for abortion, leave her alone.The only reason why you can lay her off is if she goes on abortion again and that makes her to take a time out of work and underperforming[/s].

You will definitely make a bad mother.

I pity your children already.

Tufiakwa.

I know Bosses like you, one's they see pretenders at work they will start using her as reference to other staffs. If her way of life is not affecting your job, then leave her alone. Pretend you did not see anything.

@OP

You can advise her without necessarily referring to what you saw. Your wife can also get close to her like a sister to know what's on her mind. In the process of talking to her, your insider knowledge will guide you or your wife on the questions to ask that will indirectly reveal all that you already know. It will then be easier to guide her as you pray along for her to turn a new leaf. If it is convenient for you, you may also encourage her to plan better for her future by encouraging her to develop herself. Part time studies in academics or a vocation so she has less time for frivolities.

Some people just need a shoulder to lean on and a good soul that is willing to listen to their woes so they can get valuable advice. Probably God brought her to your doorstep for this singular reason. Do your best and rely on God for guidance and strength.

As for the issue of "mind your business ", the point is that she used the office phone which is accessible to others. Besides this, if she aborts and gets into trouble, her family can point accusing fingers at you if they don't know the truth about her lifestyle. The lifestyle of an employee often impacts on a business one way or the other.

you all are saying he should mind his business.. but I will tell you a real life story that happened to me. my sales girl was having and affair with a guy she told me was her brother, mind you the reason I ask about the boy was because the first day he came to my shop money went missing from the account. then I told her I don't want that boy around my chop because I know she was lying he was her brother.. one day she lied to her brother(boyfriend) that I bought a perruzi show tickets for her not know that it was another boy she was hooking up with and when the brother(boyfriend)asked, she used me her boss to lie, now the brother ( boyfriend) is a cultists which I also latter discovered. my saving grace was a lady who was there who vouched for me that I will never carry my money to buy perruzi tickets for anybody and that was what saved me else the boy was planning to come and attack me..WE START TO DIE THE DAY WE KEEP QUIET ABOUT THINGS THAT MATTERS

talk to her ..... or your wife should but expect tantrums eventually

prepare your mind she will leave

Please go ahead to talk with her but involve your wife.
Don't judge or condemn her. Her actions may be condemned, though. Advise her like your relative. Maybe God wants to use you guys ( you and your wife) to save her from that path of destruction. Don't sack her for it except she is underperforming at the job.
If she doesn't change, then let her be. You have done your own and your conscience is free. Later she will remember the truth that you have told her. She might have even left your company by then

OritaIbadan:

I have discussed that already with my wife, she said she would talk with her provided she cooperate

Ningen:
We all have a responsibility towards building a sane society. As her employer, don't turn a blind eye to her promiscuous lifestyle. She's just 21.

As such, sacking her wouldn't solve anything.
What she badly need right now is sex education.

Your wife can take that responsibility.

It's a step forward if she learns from a woman about the dangers of promiscuity & unprotected sex. Please do that for the sake of humanity.

Sex education??

She will sex educate Op's wife instead!!

BlueAir:
Leave the wayward girl be. It's herself she's doing not you or your business.keep using her for sales.you can sack her when she's turning ur shop to brothel or hookup centre

Honestly I like your take on the matter. The boss need not bother as long as she’s doing the job he employed her for.

oga focus on ur business and leave dat girl alone.......If you DNT like her privacy...tell her what you saw........and advice her also....and let her know if she use her wayward life to affect ur business....she's gone for ever....case closed

God help you.

boxer022:
Not to be rude, but I believe you have to mind your business. You employed her as a staff of your company, you didn't give birth to her or pay her bride price. She is an adult and need to make her own decisions. Even if you sack her from work, how does it affect her life style? Focus on your business, you don't even have any right to discuss her with your wife or anyone for Ed that matter. As far as she is carrying out her assignments well, that's the only thing binding the two of you.

Fake irresponsible, chameleon Adult

Talk to her
You saw what you saw for a reason

OritaIbadan:
I employed this 21years old lady last year as a sales rep. At resumption to work she appeard so decent and godly always With her Bible and Sunday school manual. I was really impressed by her spiritual and respectful nature. This made me treat her different from others. I buy her things and sometimes gives her money and always discuss her good life style with my wife. But what amazed me was that my wife was so indifferent about her each time I discuss her my wife will quickly change the topic. I thought, well woman with their naughty behavior towards other women.

Fast forward to June first this year her phone was stolen and I have a phone in office that I allow them access to incase their phone is off I can easily reach them through it. This faithful day, I tried to access my Facebook account using the office phone and found out that this same lady had used it but forget to logout. Well, I knew it was wrong to check her inbox but all the same I did.

After checking her inbox I couldn't sleep all night. I found out that she is having unprotected sex with 5 guys each guy per Sunday and she just did an abortion March this year the very day she told me that she was sick and can't make it to work and she wasn't sure who among the guys that impregnated her. I also found out that she had missed her period again and trying to hang it on one of the boys. The amazing thing is that non of these guys suspects her, they all believe she is a faithful girl friend.

I have thought of relieving her of her job, but my wife is asking me what should I give as reasons. But the truth is that I had never winessed such a wayward life before. If I pretend as though I know nothing she will eventually commit another abortion and continue with such life which is very dangerous at her age. What if she is my own daughter?

Please I want the mode to push this to the front page. I want to seek others opnion about it

Just pray for her. She needs it

]
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OdogEbe3LGE

You've already overstepped your boundaries by going through her messages, in as much as she's your sales rep. Your relativity with her should be on business grounds and nothing more . I'd advise you "Let the sleeping dog like".

You want to sack her because she is sexually active?

She performs her job duties well right?

But her sex life is your problem?

Geez!

I wish our labour laws were stiff , wonder what your reasons would be


If you had a shred of maturity, you would call her and advise her as a father should

LadySarah:


Pls mind ur biz

Where is the business??

I think you're getting so personal about this whole thing. Let her be!

She may not be the only "rotten" staff you have. for all you know the others might also be living a worse lifestyle but you chose to take action against her wayward lifestyle. Meaning you're attached to her prolly emotionally and was disappointed at your discovery of her real self which I think is not right. Yes, you might be claiming "father figure" but what about the other staffs? Can't you be a father figure to them too?

Just retract whatever feelings you're having for her and treat her like you would a normal staff. You may not know it, but you're emotionally attached to this girl, ( forget the fatherly crap) hence the pain and decision to relieve her of her duties. In other words, you are hurt!
Snap out of it Sir.

gimme her number let me talk to her for you

I think you're getting so personal about this whole thing. Let her be!

She may not be the only "rotten" staff you have. for all you know the others might also be living a worse lifestyle but you chose to take action against her wayward lifestyle. Meaning you're attached to her prolly emotionally and was disappointed at your discovery of her; which I think is not right. Yes, you might be claiming "father figure" but what about the other staffs? Can't you be a father figure to them ad well?

Just retract whatever feelings you're having for her and treat her like you would a neutral staff. You may not know it, but you're emotionally attached to this girl, ( forget the fatherly crap) hence the pain and decision to relieve her of her duties. In other words, you are hurt!
Snap out of it Sir.

micflo28:
Op how did you get all this information all from her Facebook wall, she can sue you for invasion of privacy as she is well above 18. I sense your story is cooked up. Tell us the truth, have you been having private times with her. You can't get all this informations from a Facebook account. Well, keep your findings to yourself and keep her in your employ. Someone too could be surviving off what you pay her, her poor mum, dad or siblings and firing her will make her life worse. She will go into full prostitution. Just counsel her if you can and put her in your prayers that's all.

Is she rich enough to sue??

Op should sack her..

Let's see who will be at a loss!!

Nonsense!!

Coming from ibadan I'm not suprised.

emmajodeci:
My brother firstly its her private life and it has nothing to do with ur business being a sales representative (I'm not in support of abortion or double dating). The best you can do for her is to call her and give her an advice as an elder brother or a boss. Relieving her of her job because she is double dating or pregnant is not doing her any good instead you will make life more miserable for her. Show her love like a brother, this will make her a better person tomorrow which she will not forget than you dropping her off.

Op should continue with that girl with Chameleon personality??

Things dey happen o