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Here Is 1 Mistake That Can Destroy A Man’s Life - Romance (4) - Nairaland

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Re: Here Is 1 Mistake That Can Destroy A Man’s Life by 22brains(m): 11:18pm On Jul 05, 2020
VicM6:
Unless if i play US lottery jackpot then i can bcom a 30billon gang overnight if i won. grin
yes you are right. Before playing and wining the lottery, the work you did to earn the money and believing to win is called FOCUS.
Re: Here Is 1 Mistake That Can Destroy A Man’s Life by MrBrownJay1(m): 12:07am On Jul 06, 2020
seanwilliam:
I think It is high time i left you to bask in your ignorance and unyieldingness ...stop putting what I didnt say in my mouth..

I never said a man should be paying all the Bills nor did I say one salary is better than two.. what I am telling you is that there is no how you and your wife would be equally contributing and still get respect for you in the long run ...


I know you are ignoring the bolded in other to get a point to counter me. Equal Equal Equal Equal is what I'm talking about gentlemen..
This is not misogynistic, but A MAN IS MEANT TO CONTROL HIS WIFE.. even the bible established that fact...
How do you control? U control with what you have which the other person doesn't have ( self worth, money, exposure etc . ).. who can you control? You can only control who you are superior to...
What makes the person accept your control over them? Because they see you as a superior..


And whether you agree or not, the fact still remains that 'your woman cant love you or submit to you unconditionally'...
The condition here simply means what you have to offer( what she is benefiting from you).. the condition might be Money, goodsex,security,self worth, career ,exposure e.tc.. so the moment you loose those qualities of yours( quality here means what she likes in you ), she begins to disrespect you.. and when that happens, there would be problem...


And let me tell you one thing, relationship or marriage would never work if there is no RESPECT... respect brings LOYALTY...

U can hurt who you love, but you can never disrespect who you are loyal to.
And when there is absolute respect in marriage, then success is SURE...

A single head might not be able to effectively discharge leadership duties all the time , that is why we always have deputies and vices..
Governor is superior to deputy( deputy is only meant to support).. president is superior to vice president ( vice is meant to support)..

Are they equal NO... now relate the bolded to marriag. I'm sure you'll grab my point..

again, you can pretend to not understand what i have been telling you, so here it is one last time:
A) if you believe that you are an alpha/leader ·in control", yet cant make your wife contribute to at least 40% of all the family bills, while you are still the head of the family, then you are just a household mumu.
B) if you believe that the only way your woman can/should respect you is if you pay all the bills AND let her do what she pleases with her money/time/energy (like buy Guccy bags, Brazilian hair and mansions for her own selfish self)... while you bust your nyansh and spend ALL your money for the family, then you are just an insecure low self esteem puppy, and a disgrace to Alphas/leaders.
C) if you believe that a wife CANNOT have views/opinion in a household and, if/when she opens her mouth she will automatically take away your leadership, then you are indeed INSECURE LOW SELF ESTEEM IMMATURE at best. i guess in your world you are the smartest person on earth and your wife has nothing valid to say or do but cook/clean and have babies, lol!
D) in the African culture, we men are LION, we men were born LION, and this has nothing to do with how much money you spend on your wife. STOP ACTING LIKE A SHEEP!

last but not least: people like you have no idea what LOVE is; people like you foolishly believe that enslaving a woman and turning her into house furniture is love/commitment; people like you fail to understand that whatever oppression/money you use to keep a woman by your side, there will always be a brotha out there with MORE money and/or better status than you. thats when you will understand that you didnt have a "loving" wife but a pay as you go greedy undercover olosho.

btw this whole discussion has been about a broke man getting a broke woman pregnant... and IMHO, while you believe that the problem is the man/money, i believe the problem is solely PROPER CONTRACEPTION, because whether you are broke or not, you can still have sex (so long as you guys protect yourself). many single men are broke because they took care of business (aka pay their rent/bills/food etc)

1 Like

Re: Here Is 1 Mistake That Can Destroy A Man’s Life by seanwilliam(m): 7:35am On Jul 06, 2020
MrBrownJay1:


again, you can pretend to not understand what i have been telling you, so here it is one last time:
A) if you believe that you are an alpha/leader ·in control", yet cant make your wife contribute to at least 40% of all the family bills, while you are still the head of the family, then you are just a household mumu.
B) if you believe that the only way your woman can/should respect you is if you pay all the bills AND let her do what she pleases with her money/time/energy (like buy Guccy bags, Brazilian hair and mansions for her own selfish self)... while you bust your nyansh and spend ALL your money for the family, then you are just an insecure low self esteem puppy, and a disgrace to Alphas/leaders.
C) if you believe that a wife CANNOT have views/opinion in a household and, if/when she opens her mouth she will automatically take away your leadership, then you are indeed INSECURE LOW SELF ESTEEM IMMATURE at best. i guess in your world you are the smartest person on earth and your wife has nothing valid to say or do but cook/clean and have babies, lol!
D) in the African culture, we men are LION, we men were born LION, and this has nothing to do with how much money you spend on your wife. STOP ACTING LIKE A SHEEP!

last but not least: people like you have no idea what LOVE is; people like you foolishly believe that enslaving a woman and turning her into house furniture is love/commitment; people like you fail to understand that whatever oppression/money you use to keep a woman by your side, there will always be a brotha out there with MORE money and/or better status than you. thats when you will understand that you didnt have a "loving" wife but a pay as you go greedy undercover olosho.

btw this whole discussion has been about a broke man getting a broke woman pregnant... and IMHO, while you believe that the problem is the man/money, i believe the problem is solely PROPER CONTRACEPTION, because whether you are broke or not, you can still have sex (so long as you guys protect yourself). many single men are broke because they took care of business (aka pay their rent/bills/food etc)
this guy..

You suggested abortion and taking pills as solution to unwanted pregnancy for broke guys in relationship while I endorsed condom, mastubating or total abstinence till you find your feet standing( till you are buoyant to some extent to shoulder basic responsibility with your wife's support though without Equal contribution.)


And hey, your hypocrisy is topnotch, for you to even agree to 40% contribution from your wife, it shows you understand my point but you intentionally beating around the Bush...



I never said there is no Love what I am telling you is that every love is conditional.. even GOD’S UNCONDITIONAL LOVE HAS CONDITIONS-Whoever has my commandments and keeps them, he it is who loves me. And he who loves me will be loved by my Father, and I will love him and manifest myself to him.” (John 14:21)... not to talk of women's love... egbon the earlier you understand this the better for you and your marriage.. the moment you dont meet the condition again , then you see diminishing in respect fromyour family and society at large..


And Mr, where in my post did I say you should not take advice from you wife? Where did I say money is the only thing that makes a woman submissive? Where did I say you should enslave a wife?? Ohh I'm beginning to believe that a woman is behind this moniker.. why? Because na women dey lie against you to your face and still stand firm that you said it...


And if you are not a woman then you must be a typical naija police, who will always ignore the truth but would make sure they put wetin you no talk for your mouth grin...


Once again , your wife is there for support, no one is talking about slavery here..

And I am still saying it again and again ... LOYALTY ( which comes as a result of respect you have for the person) is better than love..



U can disrespect( lie,cheat. Backbite e.t.c) who you love, but you can never be disloyal to who you respect.. respect is what uphold marriage..


In addition to that .. a Broke man who cant feed two mouth comfortably should run away from MARRIAGE.. a broke man in relationship should take his soap or condom seriously or total abstinence if he cant do the bolded..

Taking pills or abortions is wrong.. what if the girl cant give birth again ?? What if she mistakenly takes overdose ?? And died in the process? Answer me oo.
A man should not rely on women's support, rather he should be financially and emotionally balance on his own..


A man is meant to control his wife.. and if you want to do that, you as a man must be step above her In areas that determine the leader....that's how our forefathers had successful marriage with lowest divorce rate..

1 Like

Re: Here Is 1 Mistake That Can Destroy A Man’s Life by seanwilliam(m): 7:54am On Jul 06, 2020
chigoizie7:
You are 100% correct.

It is only by the grace of God and Gods interventions.

People do not see it. Unless your parents are well to do or very supportive in the sense that they will take the responsibility of taking care of both mother and child while you pursue your dreams 1st.

But if you are living from hand to mouth and then got a girl pregnant. Just forget it.
the bolded got me rolling grin like u mean forget it e don finish

2 Likes

Re: Here Is 1 Mistake That Can Destroy A Man’s Life by Nobody: 8:10am On Jul 06, 2020
What happened to abortion?

3 Likes

Re: Here Is 1 Mistake That Can Destroy A Man’s Life by ForestHill: 8:20am On Jul 06, 2020
seanwilliam:




Also one needs to be financially capable before going into marriage..



There is nothing like supporting wife..

Note; a lady might support you if she sees the 'happy day ' coming very soon


If she doesn't see anything positive coming your way bro, na then u go know her true color..
And she would be more bitter if she gets no where to go again ( if she don born plenty)

And the bitter truth is, every lady is submissive, having MONEY is one of the things that make her submissive
Minus my mother. She's a great women; best human I've ever had in my life. God bless you with good health mama❤️

1 Like

Re: Here Is 1 Mistake That Can Destroy A Man’s Life by seanwilliam(m): 8:21am On Jul 06, 2020
ForestHill:
Minus my mother. She's a great women; best human I've ever had in my life. God bless you with good health mama❤️
amen..and mine too

2 Likes

Re: Here Is 1 Mistake That Can Destroy A Man’s Life by ForestHill: 8:21am On Jul 06, 2020
seanwilliam:
amen..and mine too
Amen

1 Like

Re: Here Is 1 Mistake That Can Destroy A Man’s Life by Nobody: 8:36am On Jul 06, 2020
seanwilliam:




Like I've said.. what you posted above is the normal way it supposed to be.. but we are in Nigeria for goodness sake....

Let's learn to face the reality... a man is the SOLE provider in the family ..your wife can only support to some extent... u cant be sharing Bill's equally in normal Africa marriage settings if you still wanna maintain your respect from your wife and family...
And mind you, western world train their women to be self reliance..
Why do women get child support from the men in the western world self? Sheybi dem dey work to, why dem no fit dey raise the kids singlehandedly when they divorce.. that goes to show you that when it comes to FINANCE, there is no equality between the two genders atleast in this part of the world..


But feminism is what is going to ruin an average naija girls who believe they are equal with men in relationship..whereas they'll keep silence when it comes to equal financial contribution... now tell me is that not pure hypocrisy on their part?? ...

U geh ma point now

Lmao. Child support is paid to anybody who’s awarded custody of the kid(s) unless he or she doesn’t request for it.
Only few men request for child support when they’re awarded custody that’s why you think child support is awarded to women alone.

2 Likes

Re: Here Is 1 Mistake That Can Destroy A Man’s Life by seanwilliam(m): 8:42am On Jul 06, 2020
Elder0001:


Lmao. Child support is paid to anybody who’s awarded custody of the kid(s) unless he or she doesn’t request for it.
Only few men request for child support when they’re awarded custody that’s why you think child support is awarded to women alone.
I agree

1 Like

Re: Here Is 1 Mistake That Can Destroy A Man’s Life by seanwilliam(m): 10:50am On Jul 06, 2020
Elder0001:
What happened to abortion?
Condom would prevent abortion.. no be all abortion dey dey successfully..so if you dey impregnate her back to back she self go dey abort back to back?? What if she dies along the process? What if she no fit get belle again as a result of abortion What if the pregnancy self get strong head and refuse to comot? cheesy Chai.. elder, I fear who no fear you...

1 Like

Re: Here Is 1 Mistake That Can Destroy A Man’s Life by MrBrownJay1(m): 6:15pm On Jul 06, 2020
seanwilliam:
this guy..
You suggested abortion and taking pills as solution to unwanted pregnancy for broke guys in relationship while I endorsed condom, mastubating or total abstinence till you find your feet standing( till you are buoyant to some extent to shoulder basic responsibility with your wife's support though without Equal contribution.)

abortion, morning after pill and contraception are proper ways to make sure that broke people dont procreate... this has absolutely NOTHING to do with being buoyant or standing on their feet OR taking care of anybody's bills.... because as i said earlier: many men are broke after taking care of business (aka rent/bills/food etc) duh!

And hey, your hypocrisy is topnotch, for you to even agree to 40% contribution from your wife, it shows you understand my point but you intentionally beating around the Bush...

yes i understand that you are a LOW SELF ESTEEM INSECURE and IMMATURE being... so since you have no balls to ask your wife to pay 50% of all bills, like any alpha/leader would, while claiming that if wifey pays as much as you she will contest for your leadership, then at least ask her to pay 40% at best, while you pay 60% (so you can hang on to your BS phoney leadership)!

I never said there is no Love what I am telling you is that every love is conditional.. even GOD’S UNCONDITIONAL LOVE HAS CONDITIONS-Whoever has my commandments and keeps them, he it is who loves me. And he who loves me will be loved by my Father, and I will love him and manifest myself to him.” (John 14:21)... not to talk of women's love... egbon the earlier you understand this the better for you and your marriage.. the moment you dont meet the condition again , then you see diminishing in respect from your family and society at large..

stop writing ARRANT NONSENSE online, it make you sound like a teenager! men like you have no clue what love is, and foolishly believe that paying ALL the bills will make a woman love you..... bwaaaaaaaaah! abeg better wake the hell up from your dream.
you are such a clueless person quoting the bible yet forget its most important passage. go read the following verse and thank me later
Proverbs 31:10-31 and stop using the bible for your selfish agenda, you are obviously clueless about your holybook.

And Mr, where in my post did I say you should not take advice from you wife? Where did I say money is the only thing that makes a woman submissive? Where did I say you should enslave a wife??
Ohh I'm beginning to believe that a woman is behind this moniker.. why? Because na women dey lie against you to your face and still stand firm that you said it...

lol, i love it when people write rubbish online and then forget completely what they wrote. here below is exactly what you wrote, while now saying you didnt:
YOU wrote: A family man deserves every respect, and he can only get that through what he can provide coupled with some self worth.. (so what you are saying is that respect for you is attained by providing payment of all the bills)
YOU wrote: there can never be equality in contribution.. if there is , then it means we have equal right which means your spouse can never be submissive to u .. (so what you are saying is that your contribution, aka money, is what will have your wife submit to you.)
YOU wrote: This is not misogynistic, but A MAN IS MEANT TO CONTROL HIS WIFE.. even the bible established that fact... How do you control? U control with what you have which the other person doesn't have (self worth, money, exposure etc).. who can you control? You can only control who you are superior to... (this to me is the Oxford dictionary definition of enslavement through paying all the bills, therefore you pay all the bills in order to enslave that person into your care. whatever you decide goes, because you pay all the bills)
YOU wrote: "And whether you agree or not, the fact still remains that your woman cant love you or submit to you unconditionally"...The condition here simply means what you have to offer( what she is benefiting from you) (so what you are saying here is that you need to pay ALL the bills before a woman can love you unconditionally. when you guys started dating that woman didnt love you unconditionally, neither when you got engaged, neither when you got married, but she ONLY started loving you when you started paying all the family bills, abi?)

Once again , your wife is there for support, no one is talking about slavery here..

you can call it what you want...control, blackmail, using money to force women to submit to you... its all the same thing.

And I am still saying it again and again ... LOYALTY ( which comes as a result of respect you have for the person) is better than love..
U can disrespect( lie,cheat. Backbite e.t.c) who you love, but you can never be disloyal to who you respect.. respect is what uphold marriage..

now i really believe you know nothing about LOVE/WOMEN... if a woman lies/cheats on you then that person is NOT loyal to you. so let me get this straight: your wife goes and fukc your neighbors and you will say she is respectful/loyal to you?!?! your wife lies that she is broke, but instead she is building mansions in Banana island in your back, and this to you is respect/loyalty?!?!?!? how old are you again?!
the minute a woman LIES/CHEATS on you then this person has absolutely no respect/loyalty to you or the r/ship you guys have FACT!

In addition to that .. a Broke man who cant feed two mouth comfortably should run away from MARRIAGE.. a broke man in relationship should take his soap or condom seriously or total abstinence if he cant do the bolded..

as i stated earlier:
so long as a man can cater for his own food, water, clothing and shelter then this man has all the requirements in his life to look for a gf (who equally should possess these same requirements). there are many men out there who are broke after PAYING the rent, PAYING the bills, PAYING for monthly food, etc. dont get it twisted. every great union must start somewhere... if both these people have the proper individual life requirements, then they can indeed get married. being married does NOT automatically means you must have kids. 1st marriage then while wifey is on contraception/birth control/condoms or whatever (until their life situation improves), they can enjoy all the sex they want. et voila!

Taking pills or abortions is wrong.. what if the girl cant give birth again ?? What if she mistakenly takes overdose ?? And died in the process? Answer me oo.

what if father xmas came to bring you sense for xmas? what if Buhari paid for your bills so that you can finally understand life? what if your wife turn out to be a man?! STOP ASSUMING ARRANT RUBBISH WITH IFs BUTs and MAYBEs... millions of people have abortions and use contraception safely. if this is wrong to you then so be it, but dont foolishly assume that we are all clueless as you are on the subject.

A man should not rely on women's support, rather he should be financially and emotionally balance on his own..

i agree, low self esteem insecure immature men like yourself shouldnt even approach women, you guys are a danger to society!

A man is meant to control his wife.. and if you want to do that, you as a man must be step above her In areas that determine the leader....that's how our forefathers had successful marriage with lowest divorce rate..

you are a disgrace to our forefathers, who were in control of their household, whether they were rich or poor... its the sheep of today that use money to seek love from women who dont give two fukcs about them. keep fooling yourself that you can buy a woman's love (by paying all the bills)... no wonder so many women drop men like you and go fukc their richer neighbors, when there are so many sheep out there. DNA tests are proving that (by the boat load)!

1 Like

Re: Here Is 1 Mistake That Can Destroy A Man’s Life by seanwilliam(m): 9:04pm On Jul 06, 2020
MrBrownJay1:


abortion, morning after pill and contraception are proper ways to make sure that broke people dont procreate... this has absolutely NOTHING to do with being buoyant or standing on their feet OR taking care of anybody's bills.... because as i said earlier: many men are broke after taking care of business (aka rent/bills/food etc) duh!



yes i understand that you are a LOW SELF ESTEEM INSECURE and IMMATURE being... so since you have no balls to ask your wife to pay 50% of all bills, like any alpha/leader would, while claiming that if wifey pays as much as you she will contest for your leadership, then at least ask her to pay 40% at best, while you pay 60% (so you can hang on to your BS phoney leadership)!



stop writing ARRANT NONSENSE online, it make you sound like a teenager! men like you have no clue what love is, and foolishly believe that paying ALL the bills will make a woman love you..... bwaaaaaaaaah! abeg better wake the hell up from your dream.
you are such a clueless person quoting the bible yet forget its most important passage. go read the following verse and thank me later
Proverbs 31:10-31 and stop using the bible for your selfish agenda, you are obviously clueless about your holybook.



lol, i love it when people write rubbish online and then forget completely what they wrote. here below is exactly what you wrote, while now saying you didnt:
YOU wrote: A family man deserves every respect, and he can only get that through what he can provide coupled with some self worth.. (so what you are saying is that respect for you is attained by providing payment of all the bills)
YOU wrote: there can never be equality in contribution.. if there is , then it means we have equal right which means your spouse can never be submissive to u .. (so what you are saying is that your contribution, aka money, is what will have your wife submit to you.)
YOU wrote: This is not misogynistic, but A MAN IS MEANT TO CONTROL HIS WIFE.. even the bible established that fact... How do you control? U control with what you have which the other person doesn't have (self worth, money, exposure etc).. who can you control? You can only control who you are superior to... (this to me is the Oxford dictionary definition of enslavement through paying all the bills, therefore you pay all the bills in order to enslave that person into your care. whatever you decide goes, because you pay all the bills)
YOU wrote: "And whether you agree or not, the fact still remains that your woman cant love you or submit to you unconditionally"...The condition here simply means what you have to offer( what she is benefiting from you) (so what you are saying here is that you need to pay ALL the bills before a woman can love you unconditionally. when you guys started dating that woman didnt love you unconditionally, neither when you got engaged, neither when you got married, but she ONLY started loving you when you started paying all the family bills, abi?)



you can call it what you want...control, blackmail, using money to force women to submit to you... its all the same thing.



now i really believe you know nothing about LOVE/WOMEN... if a woman lies/cheats on you then that person is NOT loyal to you. so let me get this straight: your wife goes and fukc your neighbors and you will say she is respectful/loyal to you?!?! your wife lies that she is broke, but instead she is building mansions in Banana island in your back, and this to you is respect/loyalty?!?!?!? how old are you again?!
the minute a woman LIES/CHEATS on you then this person has absolutely no respect/loyalty to you or the r/ship you guys have FACT!



as i stated earlier:
so long as a man can cater for his own food, water, clothing and shelter then this man has all the requirements in his life to look for a gf (who equally should possess these same requirements). there are many men out there who are broke after PAYING the rent, PAYING the bills, PAYING for monthly food, etc. dont get it twisted. every great union must start somewhere... if both these people have the proper individual life requirements, then they can indeed get married. being married does NOT automatically means you must have kids. 1st marriage then while wifey is on contraception/birth control/condoms or whatever (until their life situation improves), they can enjoy all the sex they want. et voila!



what if father xmas came to bring you sense for xmas? what if Buhari paid for your bills so that you can finally understand life? what if your wife turn out to be a man?! STOP ASSUMING ARRANT RUBBISH WITH IFs BUTs and MAYBEs... millions of people have abortions and use contraception safely. if this is wrong to you then so be it, but dont foolishly assume that we are all clueless as you are on the subject.



i agree, low self esteem insecure immature men like yourself shouldnt even approach women, you guys are a danger to society!



you are a disgrace to our forefathers, who were in control of their household, whether they were rich or poor... its the sheep of today that use money to seek love from women who dont give two fukcs about them. keep fooling yourself that you can buy a woman's love (by paying all the bills)... no wonder so many women drop men like you and go fukc their richer neighbors, when there are so many sheep out there. DNA tests are proving that (by the boat load)!


So series of abortion is okay?
Taking pills after every sex is ok?
Every love is unconditional ?
A man relying on equal contribution is ok?
Did I ever say money is the only thing that gives u respect in the family and society at large?
Mr. Man stop this your tu qouque jare.

Problem someone like you have is that, you are seriously suffering from inferiority complex( if that's the right word to use).. you see western culture as the superior and best bet.. where as you dont fully understand/grab how it works over there... .


Do I need to even argue with you? How would a right thinking individual be suggesting abortions and taking pills after every sex when you clearly know the consequences that follow that..and u know some people swallow whatever they see on internet...

And a sensible person would know that the word IF
Cant be overemphasized...

A sensible person would always weigh his options and consider every possible outcome before he takes any action..


Once again , taking pills after every sex or abortion should be replaced with using condom properly or total abstinence.. that being said ..

During our fore father's days, there was nothing like equality.. men had the total control both in finance, emotions and every aspect that determine leadership ...






And be like say you are a preacher of love? Lol, this is 2020, it is high time you woke up from your slumber.. and maybe u just jam one girl wey dey bamboozle you with LOVE..no worry, na here we go dey ... grin



Being an alpha male means being in control in emotions, finances, self worth and every aspects that matter..


AND MIND YOU, what works when you are single wouldn't work when you are MARRIED.. but your problem is ; you are not ready to admit the fact pointing to your face.. you'll rather deny it to make it look like fiction..



Stop twisting my points..


If you are equally contributing, it means both of you are equal in every way.. there is nothing like you are a leader or she is a leader.. no superior nor inferior.. and when there is no leader, an organisation is tend to fail in the long run because there would not be succumber cos every one would make sure their proposal is duly registered.
Hypocrisy is when you think you can control or bewield someone that has same power with you ... alaye wake up!
If you are ok with equality in contribution, no problem, but dont come here when your partner refuses to submit to you in the long run..


But as a brainwashed- western wannabe, who doesn't have iota of ego, I'm sure submission wouldn't be a problem to you ..

1 Like

Re: Here Is 1 Mistake That Can Destroy A Man’s Life by 22brains(m): 11:48am On Jul 08, 2020
seanwilliam:



So series of abortion is okay?
Taking pills after every sex is ok?
Every love is unconditional ?
A man relying on equal contribution is ok?
Did I ever say money is the only thing that gives u respect in the family and society at large?
Mr. Man stop this your tu qouque jare.

Problem someone like you have is that, you are seriously suffering from inferiority complex( if that's the right word to use).. you see western culture as the superior and best bet.. where as you dont fully understand/grab how it works over there... .


Do I need to even argue with you? How would a right thinking individual be suggesting abortions and taking pills after every sex when you clearly know the consequences that follow that..and u know some people swallow whatever they see on internet...

And a sensible person would know that the word IF
Cant be overemphasized...

A sensible person would always weigh his options and consider every possible outcome before he takes any action..


Once again , taking pills after every sex or abortion should be replaced with using condom properly or total abstinence.. that being said ..

During our fore father's days, there was nothing like equality.. men had the total control both in finance, emotions and every aspect that determine leadership ...






And be like say you are a preacher of love? Lol, this is 2020, it is high time you woke up from your slumber.. and maybe u just jam one girl wey dey bamboozle you with LOVE..no worry, na here we go dey ... grin



Being an alpha male means being in control in emotions, finances, self worth and every aspects that matter..


AND MIND YOU, what works when you are single wouldn't work when you are MARRIED.. but your problem is ; you are not ready to admit the fact pointing to your face.. you'll rather deny it to make it look like fiction..



Stop twisting my points..


If you are equally contributing, it means both of you are equal in every way.. there is nothing like you are a leader or she is a leader.. no superior nor inferior.. and when there is no leader, an organisation is tend to fail in the long run because there would not be succumber cos every one would make sure their proposal is duly registered.
Hypocrisy is when you think you can control or bewield someone that has same power with you ... alaye wake up!
If you are ok with equality in contribution, no problem, but dont come here when your partner refuses to submit to you in the long run..


But as a brainwashed- western wannabe, who doesn't have iota of ego, I'm sure submission wouldn't be a problem to you ..


but wait oo. Who come win for this argument now? Seanwilliam or MrBrownJay1 Lol.........
Re: Here Is 1 Mistake That Can Destroy A Man’s Life by MrBrownJay1(m): 2:57pm On Jul 08, 2020
seanwilliam:

So series of abortion is okay?
Taking pills after every sex is ok?
Every love is unconditional ?
A man relying on equal contribution is ok?
Did I ever say money is the only thing that gives u respect in the family and society at large?
Mr. Man stop this your tu qouque jare.

- better an abortion that a hungry miserable child that you cant fend for...
- educate yourself of contraceptive pills , so i dont have to do it for you...
- every love is different, but affection/respect attained via paying for all the bills is certainly nothing to boast about, and instead you should be ashamed.
- equal contribution is not the problem, being a MAN who can put his foot down (whether he pays the bills or not) is what TRUE LEADERS are judged upon.
- YES, you have said countless of times that if you dont pay all the bills, your wife wont respect/love you unconditionally.

Problem someone like you have is that, you are seriously suffering from inferiority complex( if that's the right word to use).. you see western culture as the superior and best bet.. where as you dont fully understand/grab how it works over there... .

i believe in COMMON SENSE, whether with western culture, African culture or alien culture... you are the one who is quick to hide your insecure low self esteem behind African culture while i have not for once claim anything about the western culture. YOU are the one bringing the western culture to this discussion.

Do I need to even argue with you? How would a right thinking individual be suggesting abortions and taking pills after every sex when you clearly know the consequences that follow that..and u know some people swallow whatever they see on internet...

i guess a "right thinking individual" (like yourself) would rather bring innocent children to this world and have them suffer without food/cloth/shelter/education for the next 18yrs instead, abi? as i said, there are many ways for a couple to not have children (abstinence, condoms, pills, morning after pills, pùll out technique, abortion and adoption)... but if deluded people like yourself only focus on what you dont like (while i brought countless other forms of prevention) then the problem is again YOUR narrow minded way of thinking.
you take bits and pieces from what i write to try to make a childish point, while i take EVERYTHING you say and believe its garbage.

And a sensible person would know that the word IF Cant be overemphasized... A sensible person would always weigh his options and consider every possible outcome before he takes any action..

while people like yourself would allow any woman to sit at home and watch telemundo so that you can slave away to cater for her lazy self (because your misplaced ego is in the way of your common sense)

Once again , taking pills after every sex or abortion should be replaced with using condom properly or total abstinence.. that being said ..

refer to my above point on the subject and stop acting like a 10yr old child bringing BS to this discussion, while clearly pretending you didnt read what i wrote.

During our fore father's days, there was nothing like equality.. men had the total control both in finance, emotions and every aspect that determine leadership ...

... and yes, this the real AFRICAN CULTURE. men where EVERYTHING. men would take all the family decisions and decide what time it was and wives would obey. if these men sent their wives to plow the field then thats what wifeys would do and be quiet. yet insecure low self esteem insecure men (like yourself) will now want to bring African culture to this issue, yet act like sheep and being afraid to tell your woman what to do. BWAAAAAAAAAH!

And be like say you are a preacher of love? Lol, this is 2020, it is high time you woke up from your slumber.. and maybe u just jam one girl wey dey bamboozle you with LOVE..no worry, na here we go dey ... grin

i am a preacher of LIFE and COMMON SENSE... and i am fully against FOOLISHNESS, LAZINESS AND STUPIDITY

Being an alpha male means being in control in emotions, finances, self worth and every aspects that matter..

abeg stop talking of what you dont know... if you think that slaving away to pay all the bills while your lazy wife uses her money to buy wigs and gucci bags, makes you an alpha male, then i suggest you consider the 3rd mainland bridge as your next life direction.

AND MIND YOU, what works when you are single wouldn't work when you are MARRIED.. but your problem is ; you are not ready to admit the fact pointing to your face.. you'll rather deny it to make it look like fiction..

you are clueless about LIFE, LOVE, WOMEN, MARRIAGE etc, you are so clueless about these issues, the only way you can have a woman love/trust/care for you, is if you pay for it.
in life there are steps that everyone takes to get to the next level. men like you believe that the only way two people can get married is SOLELY if that man can provide and take care of that woman's every needs. marriage to you is BECOMING A SLAVE TO SOME WOMAN....while my view on the issue is very simple: whatever situation you guys had when dating, is the situation that you should bring into marriage. if a babe was working and paid for her rent/shelter/food etc when dating, and her man too, then in marriage they should combine that money to cater for their new family (2 people) and live happily ever after, until they have enough funds to bring a 3rd person to the equation (aka a baby).
if that woman was jobless and this man was paying for her everything, then if that man ask her to marry him then he fully well knows that he will have to pay for everything since that woman is jobless... but before they get married, this man and woman should have a set plan in place for the future, to make sure that wifey brings her own fair share to the family unit. if a man desires that his wife stays home all day doing nothing, while he slaves all day long, then by all means, to each their own misery!

If you are equally contributing, it means both of you are equal in every way.. there is nothing like you are a leader or she is a leader.. no superior nor inferior.. and when there is no leader, an organisation is tend to fail in the long run because there would not be succumber cos every one would make sure their proposal is duly registered.

yet you have the AUDACITY to call yourself an ALPHA MALE/LEADER! ***spit on floor***
sheep, you are indeed! some alpha males out there have wives that earns 10 times as much as them and wifey will still respect that man's authority, leadership....and would come home every months and put her salary in hubby's hand to do as he pleases.
if you believe that an alpha male is a man who goes to work and slave away all day to pay ALL the bills while his wife his either lazy all day watching telemundo OR uses her own salary to buy wigs, gucci bags and build herself mansions, then you sir are clearly a teenager!

Hypocrisy is when you think you can control or bewield someone that has same power with you ... alaye wake up!

nah, HYPOCRISY is a man who does not "respect" his wife (because he thinks that he is better than her, since he pays all the bills) but expects that same woman to respect him.

If you are ok with equality in contribution, no problem, but dont come here when your partner refuses to submit to you in the long run..

the day you understand that two salaries contributing to the family wellbeing, will always be better than one, thats the day you will get some sense on this issue. any man who believes that a family's need/future ONLY depends on what he can bring to the table, is not only deluded and highly dangerous, but also the reason why so many are failing in marriage.

But as a brainwashed- western wannabe, who doesn't have iota of ego, I'm sure submission wouldn't be a problem to you ..

i'd rather have NO ego whatsoever and a great family environment, that being blinded by a misplaced ego, while having a family struggling to make ends meet....

1 Like

Re: Here Is 1 Mistake That Can Destroy A Man’s Life by seanwilliam(m): 3:18pm On Jul 08, 2020
22brains:
but wait oo. Who come win for this argument now? Seanwilliam or MrBrownJay1 Lol.........
lol, if you normally follow my post on nairaland , you will see that I dont argue to win seriously i argue mostly to learn.. that's if you convince me beyond reasonable doubt..I would admit defeat. person no fit know everything nah.. but if it something I know like the back of hand and I see say u are talking in the nonsense abi in the rubbish.. u self know say I no go gree.. grin

Let me give him a resounding response , and leave him to bask in his ignorance.

1 Like

Re: Here Is 1 Mistake That Can Destroy A Man’s Life by MrBrownJay1(m): 3:56pm On Jul 08, 2020
22brains:
but wait oo. Who come win for this argument now? Seanwilliam or MrBrownJay1 Lol.........

its all about common sense bro... two salaries would always be better than ONE, in any family....and if a man has insecurities and dont want his wife to pay as much as him (to each their own), then he should AT LEAST, ask wifey to contribute for 40% of the family bills (while they save away what they can). any man who would rather his family SUFFERS so that "he" can now be viewed as the "leader" at any cost, is truly insecure and selfishly thinking about his misplaced ego only (instead of his children/family's wellbeing)!

seanwilliam:
lol, if you normally follow my post on nairaland , you will see that I dont argue to win seriously i argue mostly to learn.. that's if you convince me beyond reasonable doubt..I would admit defeat. person no fit know everything nah.. but if it something I know like the back of hand and I see say u are talking in the nonsense abi in the rubbish.. u self know say I no go gree.. grin

Let me give him a resounding response , and leave him to bask in his ignorance.

[img]https://media1./images/9291f2d01792367aac63f6adaf83c06e/tenor.gif[/img]

1 Like

Re: Here Is 1 Mistake That Can Destroy A Man’s Life by seanwilliam(m): 4:28pm On Jul 08, 2020
MrBrownJay1:


its all about common sense bro... two salaries would always be better than ONE in any family....and if a man has insecurities and dont want his wife to pay as much as him (to each their own), then he shouldAT LEAST, ask wifey to contribute for 40% of the family bills (while they save away what they can). any man who would rather his family SUFFERS so that "he" can now be viewed as the "leader" at any cost, is truly insecure and selfishly thinking about his misplaced ego only (instead of his children/family's wellbeing)!


[img]https://media1./images/9291f2d01792367aac63f6adaf83c06e/tenor.gif[/img]
You are 100% hypocrite for agreeing to the embolded.. so you understand my post before, you just dey give me wahala .


I never said your wife shouldn't work
I never said she should nt support you
I never said one salary is better than two..
Mr man tell me if you are out of point ,stop Putting wetin I no talk for my mouth...

Typical naija police!

1 Like

Re: Here Is 1 Mistake That Can Destroy A Man’s Life by seanwilliam(m): 4:43pm On Jul 08, 2020
MrBrownJay1:


- better an abortion that a hungry miserable child that you cant fend for...
- educate yourself of contraceptive pills , so i dont have to do it for you...
- every love is different, but affection/respect attained via paying for all the bills is certainly nothing to boast about, and instead you should be ashamed.
- equal contribution is not the problem, being a MAN who can put his foot down (whether he pays the bills or not) is what TRUE LEADERS are judged upon.
- YES, you have said countless of times that if you dont pay all the bills, your wife wont respect/love you unconditionally.



i believe in COMMON SENSE, whether with western culture, African culture or alien culture... you are the one who is quick to hide your insecure low self esteem behind African culture while i have not for once claim anything about the western culture. YOU are the one bringing the western culture to this discussion.



i guess a "right thinking individual" (like yourself) would rather bring innocent children to this world and have them suffer without food/cloth/shelter/education for the next 18yrs instead, abi? as i said, there are many ways for a couple to not have children (abstinence, condoms, pills, morning after pills, pùll out technique, abortion and adoption)... but if deluded people like yourself only focus on what you dont like (while i brought countless other forms of prevention) then the problem is again YOUR narrow minded way of thinking.
you take bits and pieces from what i write to try to make a childish point, while i take EVERYTHING you say and believe its garbage.



while people like yourself would allow any woman to sit at home and watch telemundo so that you can slave away to cater for her lazy self (because your misplaced ego is in the way of your common sense)



refer to my above point on the subject and stop acting like a 10yr old child bringing BS to this discussion, while clearly pretending you didnt read what i wrote.



... and yes, this the real AFRICAN CULTURE. men where EVERYTHING. men would take all the family decisions and decide what time it was and wives would obey. if these men sent their wives to plow the field then thats what wifeys would do and be quiet. yet insecure low self esteem insecure men (like yourself) will now want to bring African culture to this issue, yet act like sheep and being afraid to tell your woman what to do. BWAAAAAAAAAH!



i am a preacher of LIFE and COMMON SENSE... and i am fully against FOOLISHNESS, LAZINESS AND STUPIDITY



abeg stop talking of what you dont know... if you think that slaving away to pay all the bills while your lazy wife uses her money to buy wigs and gucci bags, makes you an alpha male, then i suggest you consider the 3rd mainland bridge as your next life direction.



you are clueless about LIFE, LOVE, WOMEN, MARRIAGE etc, you are so clueless about these issues, the only way you can have a woman love/trust/care for you, is if you pay for it.
in life there are steps that everyone takes to get to the next level. men like you believe that the only way two people can get married is SOLELY if that man can provide and take care of that woman's every needs. marriage to you is BECOMING A SLAVE TO SOME WOMAN....while my view on the issue is very simple: whatever situation you guys had when dating, is the situation that you should bring into marriage. if a babe was working and paid for her rent/shelter/food etc when dating, and her man too, then in marriage they should combine that money to cater for their new family (2 people) and live happily ever after, until they have enough funds to bring a 3rd person to the equation (aka a baby).
if that woman was jobless and this man was paying for her everything, then if that man ask her to marry him then he fully well knows that he will have to pay for everything since that woman is jobless... but before they get married, this man and woman should have a set plan in place for the future, to make sure that wifey brings her own fair share to the family unit. if a man desires that his wife stays home all day doing nothing, while he slaves all day long, then by all means, to each their own misery!



yet you have the AUDACITY to call yourself an ALPHA MALE/LEADER! ***spit on floor***
sheep, you are indeed! some alpha males out there have wives that earns 10 times as much as them and wifey will still respect that man's authority, leadership....and would come home every months and put her salary in hubby's hand to do as he pleases.
if you believe that an alpha male is a man who goes to work and slave away all day to pay ALL the bills while his wife his either lazy all day watching telemundo OR uses her own salary to buy wigs, gucci bags and build herself mansions, then you sir are clearly a teenager!



nah, HYPOCRISY is a man who does not "respect" his wife (because he thinks that he is better than her, since he pays all the bills) but expects that same woman to respect him.



the day you understand that two salaries contributing to the family wellbeing, will always be better than one, thats the day you will get some sense on this issue. any man who believes that a family's need/future ONLY depends on what he can bring to the table, is not only deluded and highly dangerous, but also the reason why so many are failing in marriage.



i'd rather have NO ego whatsoever and a great family environment, that being blinded by a misplaced ego, while having a family struggling to make ends meet....

Note: I would not embolden your post to give response like you do , I'm using a phone to respond right now not a PC.. so use your sense to attach every of my response to where necessary in your post..



Firstly, whether it takes you a month or a year to come up with weak points as usual to counter my posts on this topic, I will always be here every minutes to slap sense into you to follow the right part and to open your clouded-with-ignorance eyes to the obvious facts you are ignoring to sound intellectual .. U see me ehn , I no get work grin.. that's being said..



You have four problems and I can deduce that from everything you have posited..
1. Ignoring glaring facts
2. Trying hard to sound cerebral
3. Talking nonsense with full confidence
4. Whataboutery...


First in Africa marriage, especially during the time of our forefathers.... MEN are superior to WOMEN... and this makes women totally submissive ( respect) to their husbands....

Now what made Men to be superior to women in those days ? It's because of the qualities below
1. Because emotionally men were stronger
2. Financially men were stronger
3.physically men were stronger..
4. Intellectually men were stronger
5. Exposure and experience wise, men were stronger e.tc....

Now what made women to be submissive to them??
1. For financial security
2. For physical security ( to be there if there was physical attack) .
3. For emotional security ( they believe men would not be swayed by emotions and would take material decisions).
4. Intellectuality... they believed men were intellectually better than them ...


The men's qualities as per finance, emotions, intellectuality, self worth, physical, experience and exposure e.t.c GAVE them the dominion over their women...

You geh my point now,?
That's being said..

When you offering an advice or proposal, always make sure the advantages of your points outweigh the disadvantages.... advising broke people to consider abortions or takepills after every sex is very nonsensical.. remember some under 18 might be surfing this thread... if dont have anything meaningful to say on that , it is better to shut up than opening your mouth to confirm your ignorance and absurdity..
To any one reading this... proper use of condom or total abstinence is the better thing to do ..
That again being said...



Like I have said, I personally dont have problem with your wife being equal to you or being superior to you , but I am telling you the consequence on the long run.. being an alpha male simply means having DOMINION over the opposite sex. Now answer me, shey na ONLY your mouth you go take dey dominate the opposite sex.?




Virtually all nations of the world is under Americas hegemony.. shey na mouth america take dey dominate the world?? World respect america cos of many things like military strength, economy strength,, science, technology and so on....

Before you can dominate, you have to possess some distinctive qualities..

there is no how your wife would be submissive to you in the long run if she's better than you in aspects( financ, exposure e.t.c) that matters in marriage... and you as a typical Africa man would see that as a bruise to your ego..... from there problem will start..
Alpha male without domineering qualities is a joker! You cant be an alpha Male with just your mouth...

Also being alpha male doesnt mean you dont have respect for your wife..

Women give respect/submission to men that are better than them in serious matter.. women would not respect you if they are better than you in some aspects... remember respect is 100% needed to cement your marriage..

Any man that is ok with equal contribution with an Africa lady and wouldn't come crying later if his ego is bruised should go ahead. but I'm saying this to let the yet-to-marry folks understand what makes your wife submissive/respect u in marriage..



Again marriage is an institution.. every institution needs controller in order to achieve their set aims.... institution without leader is calling for anarchy....
There should be a clear cut leader in marriage. And no one can be a leader without unequal qualities..


Your wife is superior doesnt mean you wouldn't have happy home, that's if you are ok with yourself being the wife( submitting to her) in actual sense.. afterall we have sissy being controlled by mistress. As far as you are happy with that, it's ok
Cc.freespirited

2 Likes

Re: Here Is 1 Mistake That Can Destroy A Man’s Life by MrBrownJay1(m): 5:45pm On Jul 08, 2020
seanwilliam:
Note: I would not embolden your post to give response like you do , I'm using a phone to respond right now not a PC.. so use your sense to attach every of my response to where necessary in your post..
Firstly, whether it takes you a month or a year to come up with weak points as usual to counter my posts on this topic, I will always be here every minutes to slap sense into you to follow the right part and to open your clouded-with-ignorance eyes to the obvious facts you are ignoring to sound intellectual .. U see me ehn , I no get work grin.. that's being said.
You have four problems and I can deduce that from everything you have posited..
1. Ignoring glaring facts
2. Trying hard to sound cerebral
3. Talking nonsense with full confidence
4. Whataboutery...

when people start to deviate from the discussion, with arrant rubbish, thats when i know that you have nothing more intelligent to bring to the table...

When you offering an advice or proposal, always make sure the advantages of your points outweigh the disadvantages.... advising broke people to consider abortions or takepills after every sex is very nonsensical.. remember some under 18 might be surfing this thread... if dont have anything meaningful to say on that , it is better to shut up than opening your mouth to confirm your ignorance and absurdity..
To any one reading this... proper use of condom or total abstinence is the better thing to do ..
That again being said...

coming from a person who would rather solely focus on pills and abortion while i clearly stated ABSTINENCE, CONDOMS, PULL OUT TECHNIQUE, ADOPTION too... is indeed PRICELESS! i suggest you practice what you preach!!!!

Like I have said, I personally dont have problem with your wife being equal to you or being superior to you , but I am telling you the consequence on the long run.. being an alpha male simply means have DOMINION over the opposite sex. Now answer me, shey na ONLY your mouth you go take dey dominate the opposite sex.?

stop writing rubbish... what you are doing is:
- due to your INSECURITY and LOW SELF ESTEEM, you are assuming that you need to pay all the bills (in order to control your wife)....
- due to your INSECURITY and LOW SELF ESTEEM, you are assuming that if you dont pay ALL the bills, your wife will lose respect and wont submit to you. that, my friend, is what insecure men do, because ALPHA MALES/LEADERS dont need to pay all bills to be in charge of their union.

Virtually all nations of the world is under Americas hegemony.. shey na mouth america take dey dominate the world?? World respect america cos of some many things like military strength, economy strength,, science, technology and so on.

comparing US world domination with marriage, is not only very clueless but also very childish. i guess since the US send unruly people to jails to be tortured and/or kill people that dont go against their dominance (Saddam Hussein/Quaddafi etc) , men should torture/kill their wives, abi?!?!

Before you can dominate, you have to possess some distinctive qualities... there is no how your wife would be submissive to you in the long run if she's better than you in aspects( financ, exposure e.t.c).. that matters in marriage... and you as a typical Africa man would see that as a bruise to your ego..... if you are ok with it, no problem , go ahead, it your life..

you are absolutely RIGHT, but these qualities have absolutely NOTHING to do with money or paying all the bills. if you actually believe that a man is better than any other man, just because he has more money, then you are indeed more clueless on the subject, than i previously thought.
a man's CHARACTER; VALUES; MANNERS; CHARMS, MATURITY, INTELLIGENCE, INTEGRITY etc etc is all what a man needs to possess to be called an alpha male/leader.... and guess what?! the above traits i just mentioned cant be bought with money!

Alpha male without domineering qualities is a joker! You cant be an alpha Male with just your mouth...

you dont need to dominate a woman before you can ask her to pay her own share of the family bills, (so that your family/children can have a better life) you only need COMMON SENSE... and NO misplaced ego!

Also being alpha male doesnt mean you dont have respect for your wife..

YOU are the one who stated that :" U dont give respect to who you are better than or who you are in the same position in the long run"
so i am safe to say that men like you dont respect their wives...

Women give respect/submission to men that are better than them in serious matter..

women "give respect/submit" to men they value....while men like yourself think they can BUY that respect/submission from these women....thats why you keep saying that you dont want equal contribution, because you use your financial contribution as a way to have a wife submit

Any man that is ok with equal contribution with an Africa lady and wouldn't come crying later if his ego is bruised should go ahead. but I'm saying this to let the yet-to-marry folks to understand what makes your wife submissive/submission respect u in marriage..

- failed assumptions
- misplaced ego
- sheep tendencies
- misinformation of African culture


i hope the yet to marry UNDERSTAND marriage, instead of listening to total household mumu garbage. ANY FAMILY NEED TWO SALARIES instead of ONE. the needs/wellbeing of a family and children is more important than a person misplaced ego.

Again marriage is an institution.. every institution needs controller in order to achieve their set aims.... institution without leader is calling for anarchy....

stop teaching MUMUISM to the youth, you can be a ALPHA MALE/LEADER without having a single Naira...

Your wife is superior doesnt mean you wouldn't have happy home, that's if you are ok with yourself being the wife( submitting to her) in actual sense.. afterall we have sissy being controlled by mistress. As far as you are happy with that, it's ok...

if you believe that your wife is better than you because she A) provides equally (or even 40%) to the family or B) has more money than you, then proper INSECURE LOW SELF ESTEEM SHEEP you are.

I never said your wife shouldn't work
I never said she should nt support you

no you are just saying that YOU must pay all the bills so that wifey can "respect/submit" to you. so my obvious question IS: what should she do with all her money, if not to provide for the wellbeing of the family/kids?!?

I never said one salary is better than two..

if you dont allow your wife to contribute to the family/kids's wellbeing, then how can her salary PROFIT the family/kids? you are clearly saying (since the beginning of this discussion) that your family should survive on "your" contribution only (not even 60%, as i have stated many times)... because if wifey contributes to the family, then she wont submit/respect you.

Mr man tell me if you are out of point ,stop Putting wetin I no talk for my mouth...
Typical naija police!

you say one thing, then when you are cornered like cockroach, you will now backpedal and pretend thats not what you are saying, lol!

You are 100% hypocrite for agreeing to the embolded.. so you understand my post before, you just dey give me wahala .

i have been saying the above all along, but you pretended you didnt see it. here below is again the many times i have clearly said it:

MrBrownJay1:
]here is a clue: you pay 100K monthly and she pays 90K...OR you pay 250K and she pays 200K.. let there be a clear amount that both MUST pay each month for the wellbeing of the family... this is not a choice but a set fee (min 80% of your contribution) that she must contribute each month... if she doesnt contribute then she is no better than the housegirl!
btw: if she earns more than you then SHE pays more.

MrBrownJay1:
then simply ask wifey to contribute 40% of all bills while you pay 60%, but if you are even afraid to approach your wife and make her understand why she needs to contribute for the wellbeing of the family, then you sir are a puppy, NOT a leader!

MrBrownJay1:
A) if you believe that you are an alpha/leader "in control", yet cant make your wife contribute to at least 40% of all the family bills, while you are still the head of the family, then you are just a household mumu.

MrBrownJay1:
yes i understand that you are a LOW SELF ESTEEM INSECURE and IMMATURE being... so since you have no balls to ask your wife to pay 50% of all bills, like any alpha/leader would, while claiming that if wifey pays as much as you she will contest for your leadership, then at least ask her to pay 40% at best, while you pay 60% (so you can hang on to your BS phoney leadership)!

1 Like

Re: Here Is 1 Mistake That Can Destroy A Man’s Life by seanwilliam(m): 8:30pm On Jul 08, 2020
MrBrownJay1:


when people start to deviate from the discussion, with arrant rubbish, thats when i know that you have nothing more intelligent to bring to the table...



coming from a person who would rather solely focus on pills and abortion while i clearly stated ABSTINENCE, CONDOMS, PULL OUT TECHNIQUE, ADOPTION too... is indeed PRICELESS! i suggest you practice what you preach!!!!



stop writing rubbish... what you are doing is:
- due to your INSECURITY and LOW SELF ESTEEM, you are assuming that you need to pay all the bills (in order to control your wife)....
- due to your INSECURITY and LOW SELF ESTEEM, you are assuming that if you dont pay ALL the bills, your wife will lose respect and wont submit to you. that, my friend, is what insecure men do, because ALPHA MALES/LEADERS dont need to pay all bills to be in charge of their union.



comparing US world domination with marriage, is not only very clueless but also very childish. i guess since the US send unruly people to jails to be tortured and/or kill people that dont go against their dominance (Saddam Hussein/Quaddafi etc) , men should torture/kill their wives, abi?!?!



you are absolutely RIGHT, but these qualities have absolutely NOTHING to do with money or paying all the bills. if you actually believe that a man is better than any other man, just because he has more money, then you are indeed more clueless on the subject, than i previously thought.
a man's CHARACTER; VALUES; MANNERS; CHARMS, MATURITY, INTELLIGENCE, INTEGRITY etc etc is all what a man needs to possess to be called an alpha male/leader.... and guess what?! the above traits i just mentioned cant be bought with money!



you dont need to dominate a woman before you can ask her to pay her own share of the family bills, (so that your family/children can have a better life) you only need COMMON SENSE... and NO misplaced ego!



YOU are the one who stated that :" U dont give respect to who you are better than or who you are in the same position in the long run"
so i am safe to say that men like you dont respect their wives...



women "give respect/submit" to men they value....while men like yourself think they can BUY that respect/submission from these women....thats why you keep saying that you dont want equal contribution, because you use your financial contribution as a way to have a wife submit



- failed assumptions
- misplaced ego
- sheep tendencies
- misinformation of African culture


i hope the yet to marry UNDERSTAND marriage, instead of listening to total household mumu garbage. ANY FAMILY NEED TWO SALARIES instead of ONE. the needs/wellbeing of a family and children is more important than a person misplaced ego.



stop teaching MUMUISM to the youth, you can be a ALPHA MALE/LEADER without having a single Naira...



if you believe that your wife is better than you because she A) provides equally (or even 40%) to the family or B) has more money than you, then proper INSECURE LOW SELF ESTEEM SHEEP you are.



no you are just saying that YOU must pay all the bills so that wifey can "respect/submit" to you. so my obvious question IS: what should she do with all her money, if not to provide for the wellbeing of the family/kids?!?



if you dont allow your wife to contribute to the family/kids's wellbeing, then how can her salary PROFIT the family/kids? you are clearly saying (since the beginning of this discussion) that your family should survive on "your" contribution only (not even 60%, as i have stated many times)... because if wifey contributes to the family, then she wont submit/respect you.



you say one thing, then when you are cornered like cockroach, you will now backpedal and pretend thats not what you are saying, lol!



i have been saying the above all along, but you pretended you didnt see it. here below is again the many times i have clearly said it:









Since you keep paddling the canoe to your side and intentionally changing my points using ad hominem tactics.. then it's high time I left you to wallow in ignorance..
For the record

I never said anywhere that a man should pay all the bills.. I never said anywhere that your wife should not support you ..
I never said your wife should spend her money alone..
All I'm saying is that you should be mindful of EQUAL CONTRIBUTION which may bruise your ego as a result of disrespect in the long run from your wife, to you as a typical Africa man..

I am telling you that for you to have control over your family as a man, you must be a step ahead in aspects that matter.. but if you believe or dont have problem with role switching in marriage then go ahead..


Next time argue by addressing the substance of the argument or produce evidence against the claim;

attempting to argue against me, by discrediting me or falsely accusing me of what I didnt say is nothing but pure hypocrisy..

Peace!

1 Like

Re: Here Is 1 Mistake That Can Destroy A Man’s Life by MrBrownJay1(m): 1:38am On Jul 09, 2020
seanwilliam:
Since you keep paddling the canoe to your side and intentionally changing my points using ad hominem tactics.. then it's high time I left you to wallow in ignorance..

i did use common sense and your own points to discredit many of the things you said.... also, i sincerely believe that men (like yourself) who have misplaced ego, blinding them from acting right, is wrong. you cant expect a couple to be "one" when insecure men like yourself are in charge. you are even afraid to let your partner take decision for your own couple, as if by doing so she will rob you of your manhood or something. you carry this Alpha male/leader thingy on your head with no consideration whatsoever about the woman that you supposedly want to spend the rest of your life with. you are so scared of her that you need to have total control... i guess next you will even tell her what to wear and when to eat, abi?

For the record
I never said anywhere that a man should pay all the bills..

DING DING DING, the lie detector determined THAT WAS A LIE...
from the beginning of this discussion, you have been saying it:... here below is how YOU started and went on and on about it (dont try to now pretend you didnt say that):

seanwilliam:
Before a man can consider going into marriage .. u MUST be ok to feed atleast 2 mouths bro..
What associates with the word "MAN" no be small thing..
No one is asking you to get money like Davido or anything before going into marriage.. but atleast be capable to provide the basic needs of life for yourself and your prospective family

so are you "now" saying that a man should NOT provide for all the basic needs of the family, as i have been saying all along?!?!?!?

I never said anywhere that your wife should not support you ..

DING DING DING, the lie detector determined THAT WAS A LIE...
kai!!! how much more LIES are you gonna bring to this discussion? here below is what YOU wrote on this thread:

seanwilliam:
Also one needs to be financially capable before going into marriage..
There is nothing like supporting wife..

I never said your wife should spend her money alone..
All I'm saying is that you should be mindful of EQUAL CONTRIBUTION which may bruise your ego as a result of disrespect in the long run from your wife, to you as a typical Africa man..

your wife contributing 40% of the bills is not equal contribution.... stop pretending you dont see what i wrote. if you are too afraid that your wife pays 50% of all bills then ask her to pay 40%...et voila!

I am telling you that for you to have control over your family as a man, you must be a step ahead in aspects that matter.. but if you believe or dont have problem with role switching in marriage then go ahead..

alpha males/leaders dont care about switching roles in their union, because regardless of what happens, they are ALWAYS in charge.

Next time argue by addressing the substance of the argument or produce evidence against the claim;
attempting to argue against me, by discrediting me or falsely accusing me of what I didnt say is nothing but pure hypocrisy..
Peace!

bro, i certainly aint 15yrs old that you think you can write BS (as if a misplaced ego is a reason to act a damn fool) and expect me to just accept it.... i understand that its difficult for you to accept that all my points do make sense, and that you have nothing tangible to bring to the table....and instead you are going round and round.

again, you are now backtracking claiming a lot of things, and i've posted above exactly what you claim you never said. dwell on that for a minute.

1 Like

Re: Here Is 1 Mistake That Can Destroy A Man’s Life by seanwilliam(m): 11:33am On Jun 03
seanwilliam:



The op is saying the bitter truth .. there is nothing to counter in his post.. what you said is not always easy for 90% of guys.. even the 10%that manage to japa would still "jawa" by the time they see correct pressure from both families.. and they wouldn't have choice but to succumb.. u can't japa forever for a girl that born for you..and even if you do, the thought would hunt you forever..
And if you collect the child, he/she is already a distraction..
So to avoid stories that touch , it is better to steer clear of avoidable mistakes...



Although running away from girls when broke doesnt guarantee success but it guarantees peace of mind and focus...
4 years ago , I kinda lived a careful life, now I enjoy being reckless….. ticket to my downfall 😎

1 Like

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