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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / This Is For Men Only: Women Should Not Read This (2123 Views)
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Re: This Is For Men Only: Women Should Not Read This by bukatyne(f): 11:39am On Jul 12, 2020 |
Ybaby: @bold: Gbam. The law of seedtime and harvest has not changed. 6 Likes |
Re: This Is For Men Only: Women Should Not Read This by Saintmary(f): 11:55am On Jul 12, 2020 |
dominique: Tell them oooo Loud it!!!!! 3 Likes
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Re: This Is For Men Only: Women Should Not Read This by LordKO(m): 11:59am On Jul 12, 2020 |
Dande55: It's actually not true that all husbands who have been neglected at old age by their wives and offspring are bad, that is an indirect way of proclaiming all women good. Most husbands who have been neglected at old age are actually servile men who are victims of crass, expedient and disingenuous wives - timidity/lack of willpower/low self-esteem is the greatest undoing of servile men, and women, not their evil deeds. Men who have been neglected at old age because of their evil deeds are in the minority. 10 Likes |
Re: This Is For Men Only: Women Should Not Read This by Dande55: 12:33pm On Jul 12, 2020 |
LordKO:You think children will be dumb forever? Children grow and know who and who is being vile, self centred and wicked. You've never seen a case where the children come out to challenge their wicked and vicious mother for maltreating their father and not being appreciative? All these things you are saying, once the kids start growing, and start having sense, nobody will force them to take side. 6 Likes |
Re: This Is For Men Only: Women Should Not Read This by LordKO(m): 12:52pm On Jul 12, 2020 |
Dande55: Only few children have always been able to disentangle themselves from mental conditioning of either of their parents and they usually do so when it's too late. The same way only few people in toxic union have always been able to extricate themselves from stockholm syndrome. In fact, it's near impossible for someone who's inherently either feeble-minded or egoistic to either disentangle or extricate himself/herself from either of the maladies, especially when the oppressing party still enjoys his/her evil and has the wherewithal to maintain it. The easiest way to avoid being a victim is coming into equity with clean hands and accept nothing less too. 4 Likes |
Re: This Is For Men Only: Women Should Not Read This by Unnerve: 2:48pm On Jul 12, 2020 |
LordKO:The bold text is certainly more true than the misinformation i.e your last sentence. |
Re: This Is For Men Only: Women Should Not Read This by Unnerve: 2:57pm On Jul 12, 2020 |
elifeonline:These advises are more practical when it comes to having/achieving financial and economic comfort in old age. Just shouting that a man should treat his wife well, and this is all he needs to be comfortable (and not lonely) in old age is a big gamble which no sensible man should ever take. I'd rather wager my stability and comfort in old age on tangible things like in the list above, than on how a woman will feel about me. Lol, the latter is too volatile, too uncertain. 1 Like |
Re: This Is For Men Only: Women Should Not Read This by YourCoffin: 4:57pm On Jul 12, 2020 |
Unnerve: Exactly. Humans that are historically fickle-minded are the ones you should treat nicely so you will benefit from them in old age? Story! Treat your wife well but make sure you sort yourself first. 1 Like |
Re: This Is For Men Only: Women Should Not Read This by Smile4mee01: 4:57pm On Jul 12, 2020 |
Openbusiness3: Nothing explains this thread better than this reply. Guys, don't get the Op wrong. This is not about men who treat their wives wrong, Caring for your parents in old age is an unwritten contract in Africa. Something I even admire, because it comes with its blessings. this also is what makes us different from the west. However, this thread is about men who sacrificed, struggled it out, did all they could while they could so the next generation could be better off only for the kids to be emotionally blackmailed to thinking their dad little or nothing. I told a friend of mine, A man really knows a wife who loves him when he is weak, feeble, and vulnerable. Haven said that i dont think men are fighting for resources with the mum, its just sad that men who sacrificed equally like the mums sometimes are not acknowledged for doing so. Making them feel unappreciated. It hurts seeing that you are treated the same way like an irresponsible father who did not cater to his family. Nonetheless, please this is not a man vs woman thread. it's just a thread waking men up to preparing for their old age, this way nothing catches them off guard. Someone said earlier, that is why it is good to marry a good woman as she ensures the kids never forget the sacrifices of ther father. the problem is you never really really know who a good woman is, it sometimes feel like black market. you marry with the hope that it ends good , that is why i am more disposed to attending a 20yr, 30yr wedding anniversy that a wedding party. Some of the ones person attend sef don scatter. Anywayz, Men please dont hate your family o. keep doing your best, love your wife and dont forget yourself. |
Re: This Is For Men Only: Women Should Not Read This by Sixfeetbelle: 5:06pm On Jul 12, 2020 |
Smile4mee01: But my father is well loved in our family cause he strived for his family. He worked with my mother in raising us and catering for the family. He was not a lord; rather a husband and a father. He can cook and clean up after himself; can take of us singlehandedly even if our mother is not there. Washed my clothes for me till I was like 7, etc. He knew what family values was and there was no way my mother could have poisoned me against him. While growing up, I knew my parents, especially my dad, lived modest lives to cater for us: old clothes, shoes, no vacations, no new cars, endured rain and sunshine just to cater for us. On top going to work everyday and managing peanut salary, he still found a way to balance his loving kindness and discipline. (I still dey fear his cane even in this my adulthood ![]() Now, to his benefits. He has a house in the village in his name. Although he inherited the land from his own parents, but my mother and our eldest contributed to the building cause of the kind of giving man he is. That's what sacrifice gives you in your old age. Point is, a good man will reap good benefits in his old age. 6 Likes |
Re: This Is For Men Only: Women Should Not Read This by Greatzeus(m): 5:26pm On Jul 12, 2020 |
This is so true. But some men are real men so they value their fathers like anything. Last week,a big shot banker in Lagos bought a house for his dad in somolu, renovated it and contracted us to install inverter for his dad. I was so impressed when I entered the building,the Spirit of his dad will keep praying for him till he dies. |
Re: This Is For Men Only: Women Should Not Read This by Sixfeetbelle: 5:44pm On Jul 12, 2020 |
Openbusiness3: No matter how much I try to see it, I can't. No man born of woman that put his family first will get "forgotten" by his family in his old age. Nature doesn't work like that. You can't tell me after your kids saw you suffer for them and you are nice and respectful to their mother, they'd forget all that? No nah. They aren't ingrates. Scenario where such happens is when spouses are not in sync so your sufferings may go unnoticed. Asides, no child will ignore any parents sacrifices in a good, balanced home. 1 Like |
Re: This Is For Men Only: Women Should Not Read This by Openbusiness3: 5:46pm On Jul 12, 2020 |
Sixfeetbelle:how many homes are good and balanced in Nigeria? How many homes are the spouses in sync? |
Re: This Is For Men Only: Women Should Not Read This by Sixfeetbelle: 6:21pm On Jul 12, 2020 |
Openbusiness3: Then I think this your question explains everything. It shows Ops advice is for men who knew they didn't treat their wives right and were absent in their children's life, never to men who understood family values. 2 Likes |
Re: This Is For Men Only: Women Should Not Read This by Openbusiness3: 6:33pm On Jul 12, 2020 |
Sixfeetbelle:Who didn't treat their wives right? So every family that has issues is because the husband didn't treat his wife right? I don't think you understand what the OP is saying. |
Re: This Is For Men Only: Women Should Not Read This by Unnerve: 6:56pm On Jul 12, 2020 |
YourCoffin:True, especially about sorting out yourself and putting things in place for old age. I'm not at all sympathetic to that belief about being nice just because I want to be taken care of by my wife or children. Life is not so certain. 3 Likes |
Re: This Is For Men Only: Women Should Not Read This by Unnerve: 6:58pm On Jul 12, 2020 |
Sixfeetbelle:You really think everything works out good & perfect for all men who 'undertood family values' yea? Lol I'd like to know your favourite cool-aid flavour. 1 Like |
Re: This Is For Men Only: Women Should Not Read This by Sixfeetbelle: 7:50pm On Jul 12, 2020 |
Unnerve: It is my thought. No apologies if it doesn't complement yours. I've never had a cool-aid though ![]() 1 Like |
Re: This Is For Men Only: Women Should Not Read This by Unnerve: 8:05pm On Jul 12, 2020 |
Sixfeetbelle:So the simple answer is yes. You believe that every man who understood family values always enjoys old age. Okay. 2 Likes |
Re: This Is For Men Only: Women Should Not Read This by Thastie(f): 9:48pm On Jul 12, 2020 |
These men mostly treated their wives badly. Rather than sleep at home, they sleep around. They beat their wives in their kids presence. The kids saw their mom tears Everytime. They came back from school and caught their father with one of his sidechics. The society told the wives "focus on your kids, ignore him" These women devoted their lives to their kids. They were involved in every aspect of their children lives. When baba turned fifty/sixty plus, he retired from his whoring. The kids are grown already, living comfortable lives. Baba is back forming "man of the house" The kids be like "come to the UK, don't let Daddy kill you with his wahala" The scenario I painted is real. I know too many families like that. 2 Likes |
Re: This Is For Men Only: Women Should Not Read This by Ybaby: 4:12am On Jul 13, 2020 |
LordKO: Love this apart from the bullet part. Aim to be a good husband and father and you will be rewarded. 1 Like |
Re: This Is For Men Only: Women Should Not Read This by Ybaby: 4:54am On Jul 13, 2020 |
Greatzeus: His father added value to his life growing up. You reap what you sow. If your kids do not know you or experience love from you as a father - you are hardening thier heart and will reap it. Pay school fees, teach your children, embrace them, take them out, play with them, talk t them, teach them the child of who they are - that is your values. Remember the 3 circle of life - In the morning you sow into them and decide what school they will go to - at night they will decide where you will live. Give them good schools, empower them so they can choose well for you at night. No matter how much money you have in old age - you need you kids. Be good to them. Geniune love! 2 Likes |
Re: This Is For Men Only: Women Should Not Read This by Herbephe1(m): 5:44am On Jul 13, 2020 |
it depends on the kind of wife you marry. I once told my mum"look maami, no matter what you say, my father remains my father, and as long as I'm alive my father will not suffer, I will take care of both of you, pls do not expect me taking care of you and neglecting my dad, I can NEVER do that unless I'm charmed"cursed" On the day I made this statement, I had a terrible nightmare, which I'm afraid of even telling my confidant! it's really terrible and it had to with my dam and me. |
Re: This Is For Men Only: Women Should Not Read This by efosky1246(m): 8:03pm On Jul 20, 2020 |
LordKO: Very true. Some men don't understand that it is the love(the sacrificing one) you pour into a woman, your children that you'll get back. They think if they treat their wife like shit, use money for their children school fees to carry women and leave their wives to carry the heavy burden of the entire household that they are still entitled to be taken care of in their old age, or the small change they'll have that time will save them. It's only the wife of your youth that'll pack your shit with no complaints given. Money can never buy it. Men who live a life of responsibility to their family, Treat their wife with love,assigning her honour as though a weaker vessel, present in the life of their children as a father rightly should might not be travelling over the world for omo- ugwo but they are rarely neglected.their account balance will show it, the love from the wife when he needs it the most will attest to it. |
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