I'm sorry to bother you all this early morning with this my story.

Apologies for any blunders spotted, and sorry for the lengthy post.

I have a niece who unfortunately the mother died when she was barely a month old, and her mother was my only sibling as my mother gave birth to two of us, remaining only me now. Her death was really painful to us, but i thank God for consoling us especially my mother.

During her pregnancy, she never made mentioned of the person responsible for her pregnancy inspite of my mother's threat. When the inevitable happened we had no other option than to adopt the child. We were praying earnestly that the child survive, glory to God she did survive though it wasn't easy, as at now she's 14years old and currently in SSS1.

Last week my mum called me that my niece says she's coming to Uyo were i am staying to stay with me since there's no school for now, which i obliged to it immediately. Prior before this call, my girlfriend whom i intended to marry was staying with me. I informed her immediately that my niece is coming to stay with us for a short period of time, immediately i told her this, her countenance change through out that day. I keep on asking her what the matter was but she keep on saying nothing.

Monday last weekmy niece arrived my place.

My dears ever since my niece set her foot in my house, this girlfriend of mine whom i intended to marry turned to something else. She stop cooking, washing and sweeping, all she does is to ordered my niece around as her house help. I was so hurt seeing this that i confronted her thinking that she will change, but she went from bad to worst.

Yesterday morning i overheard her telling my niece to wash the toilet and mop the floor before thinking of eating. My niece replied that she's too tired that she won't be able to do it(I was actually happy inside when i hear this)

What follows next was a sounding knocked she gave to my niece and the poor girl screamed and started crying.

Truth be said, i was so furious that came out of the room. I didn't asked her anything i just told her your cup is full today. I dealt with her seriously. The beating i gave to her was out of this world, that she was bleeding, though later in the day i took her to a nearby clinic for treatment.

I have learnt alot this few days. Men should be careful of the type of women they intend to settle down with.

As some of them will manipulate you that you start hating your family members or stop them from coming to your house for no reasons if you're not strong.

I want her to get well after that i will put an end to the relationship, all marriage plan cancel, and no going back and no regret.

Imagine if I've gone ahead to marry her. Is this how she will be maltreating my niece? obviously i will forever leave in regrets.

If you ask me if i feel sorry for beating her, truth is, there's no atom of regret in me, and i will never feel sorry for her. If she has the mind to maltreat a poor girl whose mother is late, she's capable of anything.

Insults are welcome.

Anigreat:

She stop cooking, washing and sweeping, all she does is to ordered my niece around as her house help. I was so hurt seeing this that i confronted her thinking that she will change, but she went from bad to worst.

I been think sey na until you don marry before she supposed live with you.... Abi nor be so e supposed be?

Anigreat:


I have learnt alot this few days. Men should be careful of the type of women they intend to settle down with.
As some of them will manipulate you that you start hating your family members or stop them from coming to your house if you're not strong. Yes, this is what is going on in our society.

It's good. Your family first. When you're in trouble that's when you come to value your own family. Wife fit run, husband fit run but your family will have your back. I am not saying you shouldn't build your own family so you can rely on your wife or husband o.

In this case, If what you're saying is the truth, then this your wife to be is just being wicked.

Anigreat:

Truth be said, i was so furious that came out of the room. I didn't asked her anything i just told her your cup is full today. I dealt with her seriously. The beating i gave to her was out of this world, that she was bleeding, though later in the day i took her to a nearby clinic for treatment.

I have this habit of strolling away from toxic relationships. I keep on warning you till I stroll away. I don't beat women, I walk away and never return. I'm a quiet and happy person, I don't need anything to spoil my mood. How many years person wan live on earth to go woman stress?

But trust me, there are marriages made in heaven. If you see that person you go know if you're not carried away by looks on either party.

Next time, careful, tell her to leave your house instead of you beating her. What if she dies in the process of you beating her?

that your gal na witch she be.

I love the fact that u said insults are welcome because u urself know that u need to be insulted....

how old are u self in the first place

let me just point out some things for u here:


1.u are not married yet and u are already living together and she has been doing house chores, u have been doing the other night play together. U need to be flogged urself on this.

2. there are ways of resolving things when things go wrong in marriage (u are even cohabiting self) rather than beating. u have started beating her, so when u marry her u will kuku kill her if she does something worse than that.

3. don't marry that woman as it is obvious that she is a lazy woman(girl). You are seeing her true colors gradually

4. In case u see another responsible lady and u finally marry, don't give that ur niece audacity to think she can do anything in ur house because of the bonding.

5. the truth is just that, not all woman like a third-party in their house, so know how to handle things easily with them...


shikena!

A man will ALWAYS accommodate, respect, be friendly, spend and also value people from his wife's family, but a woman will NEVER EVER do the same. I don't just understand the kind of creatures these elements are.

These days, it's easier to make money than to marry a good and accommodating woman in Nigeria,

God have already shown you a sign.

....Thank God for opening your eyes.

Na kill she go kill you if you marry am

Am girl o, but part u where u said her cup has full today cracked me badly, abeg no marry, she is obviously wicked.
Just be careful next time

Thank God you saw it on time..this is how they pretend after marriage their wicked heart will show out..abeg leave her

OP beat up his ex-fiancée
ex-fiancée up his niece

Are we seeing a pattern of the 'strong' beating/bullying the 'weaker'.

Perhaps the world has been looking at the issue of domestic violence in silos.

It is really the stronger picking on/bullying/beating the weaker in a domestic setting.

Why did you beat her instead of sending her away? What did you achieve by beating her?

JONNYSPUTE:
....Thank God for opening your eyes.

Na kill she go kill you if you marry am

Two of them for kill themself...they both obviously have personal problems to fix in their lives individually, none of them has grown to the level of marriage yet.

Don't THINK of marrying that girl...... Or you will leave in regret.. Note. Apply wisdom when discharging her from your life. Move in a different dimension to discharge her fully. With all you have said if you marry her. You are in a big wahala.


END THE RELATIONSHIP DON'T LISTEN TO PLEADS. A SNAKE WILL ALWAYS BE A SNAKE.. IT CAN NEVER CHANGE OOOOH.

IF A LADY CAN'T RESPECT YOUR FAMILY THEN AFTER MARRIAGE SHE WON'T RESPECT YOU. SHE'S BEEN PRETENDING TO BE GOOD AND NICE TO WIN YOUR HEART TOWARDS MARRIAGE.

Good decision

But then you would have noticed it long before her wickedness fell on your niece!

My observations:

1. You're a bad example to your niece. Cohabiting under the same roof with your 14 year old niece is wrong. Domestic violence in her presence is also wrong.

2. You should regret beating a woman so much that you had to take her to the clinic.

3. Your decision to call off your marriage plans is well thought-out.

4. Walking away doesn't mean your next relationship would be better. I mean, your late sister couldn't even tell you guys the man that got her pregnant. There was no mention about your dad in your write-up, so your mom is probably a single mother, and here you are, writing the same old story by cohabiting with a woman.

5. Think about it.

YourCoffin:
Why did you beat her instead of sending her away? What did you achieve by beating her?

...And why did she beat the small girl?

Is she also not a human being/ female?

Why can't she just walk away or better still do the choirs herself?

And what did she also achieve by beating the 14 yrs old girl ?

YourCoffin:
Why did you beat her instead of sending her away? What did you achieve by beating her?

I bet it was not deliberate. Just an anger reflex. He should have the remorse to regret it. I can only beat a woman when she is offensive against me; trying to go physical with me. Because even in court of law it is called self-defence.

OP, you shouldn't have beat her. You should have urged her by the side and separately to apologise to your niece in your absence, and also desist from en-slaving her with chores. She can de-list some chores to your niece while she handles the others. That would have been mature and wise from her. Sometimes we don't meet the perfect wife material, we can only mould them to our taste. But if they resist to be moulded or don't make deliberate attempts to change for the better, that's where I call it QUITS!

bukatyne:
OP beat up his ex-fiancée
ex-fiancée up his niece

Are we seeing a pattern of the 'strong' beating/bullying the 'weaker'.

Perhaps the world has been looking at the issue of domestic violence in silos.

It is really the stronger picking on/bullying/beating the weaker in a domestic setting.

No, it has never been the strongest bullying the weakest in a domestic setting or any other setting; instead, the toxic person has always been the instigator, directly or indirectly. The instigator, however, can be the strongest or the weakest person.

tehilah92:
Am girl o, but part u where u said her cup has full today cracked me badly, abeg no marry, she is obviously wicked.
Just be careful next time

pls this your uniform is it for lastma?

flyingpig:
I bet it was not deliberate. Just an anger reflex. He should have the remorse to regret it. I can only beat a woman when she is offensive against me; trying to go physical with me. Because even in court of law it is called self-defence.

OP, you shouldn't have beat her. You should have urged her by the side and separately to apologise to your niece in your absence, and also desist from en-slaving her with chores. She can de-list some chores to your niece while she handles the others. That would have been mature and wise from her. Sometimes we don't meet the perfect wife material, we can only mould them to our taste. But if they resist to be moulded or don't make deliberate attempts to change for the better, that's where I call it QUITS!

Have you not seen that there is no remorse or regret when you did the right thing?

Though, my Friend would say "he has taken his reward"

I like u brother....

U don't take rubbish.... See as u write finish come add


INSULTS ARE WELCOME....



U ready for anything

Your ex-fiancee beat your niece, you beat her in return. Now tell me, what's the difference between the both of you.

And why pray tell are you co-habiting with a woman who is not yet your wife and making her do wifely duties?

This story could be fake but not uncommon to the behavior of most Nigerian men.

Anigreat:
I'm sorry to bother you all this early morning with this my story.

Apologies for any blunders spotted, and sorry for the lengthy post.

A have a niece who unfortunately the mother died when she was barely a month old, and her mother was my only sibling as my mother gave birth to two of us, remaining only me now. Her death was really painful to us, but i thank God for consoling us especially my mother.

During her pregnancy, she never made mentioned of the person responsible for her pregnancy inspite of my mother's threat. When the inevitable happened we had no other option than to adopt the child. We were praying earnestly that the child should survive, and glory to God she did survive as at now she's 14years old and currently in SSS1.

Last week my mum called me that my niece says she's coming to Uyo were i am staying to stay with me since there's no school for now, which i obliged to it immediately. Prior before this call, my girlfriend whom i intended to marry was staying with me. I informed her immediately that my niece is coming to stay with us for a short period of time, immediately i told her this, her countenance change through out that day. I keep on asking her what the matter was but she keep on saying nothing.

Monday last weekmy niece arrived my place.

My dears ever since my niece set her foot in my house, this girlfriend of mine whom i intended to marry turned to something else. She stop cooking, washing and sweeping, all she does is to ordered my niece around as her house help. I was so hurt seeing this that i confronted her thinking that she will change, but she went from bad to worst.

Yesterday morning i overheard her telling my niece to wash the toilet and mop the floor before thinking of eating. My niece replied that she's too tired that she won't be able to do it. (I was actually happy inside when i hear this)

What follows next was a sounding knocked she gave to my niece and the poor girl scream and started crying.

Truth be said, i was so furious that came out of the room. I didn't asked her anything i just told her your cup is full today. I dealt with her seriously. The beating i gave to her was out of this world, that she was bleeding, though later in the day i took her to a nearby clinic for treatment.

I have learnt alot this few days. Men should be careful of the type of women they intend to settle down with.
As some of them will manipulate you that you start hating your family members or stop them from coming to your house if you're not strong. Yes, this is what is going on in our society.


I want her to get well after that i will put an end to the relationship, all marriage plan cancel. Imagine if I've gone ahead to marry her. I will forever live in regret. I can't imagine my niece being maltreated in my own house by my own wife.


If you ask me if i feel sorry for beating her, truth is, there's no atom of regret in me, i feel happy.

Insults are welcome.

No one will insult you Bro. It's a good thing God used ur niece to expose ur wife to be.. Family they say, is everything .

* You shouldn't have beaten her up. You don't have such rights.

* You both were on the verge of establishing a union outside the stipulated tenets constituted by the Author and institutionalizing Force behind such a union, such is the reason for marital woes and turbulence we are witnessing in our generation.

Hebrews 13:4 Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge.

* Go back to the drawing board and get things right. Without God and without being regenerated, marriage is a blurred, aimless venture

* She was wrong to have knocked your niece, she lacks gentility, meekness and goodness. But all hope isn't lost with her, perhaps she might be a better woman after she experiences regeneration - new birth.

* Apologise for beating her up. You should be remorseful.

* Change is constant, your differences and grievances can still be sorted out. All hope is not lost. If you both are willing to change for the better..

* You did the right thing in being protective of your little, vulnerable niece. Be sure she isn't over pampered though.

Run, I mean run. Any woman that can be comfortable in using a minor as relief can be deadly. Apologise to her, work on your anger and stop the marriage plan.

.

First of all, no be yur niece suppose do the house chores as baby of the house?

2ndly, understand that most times it's the wife and her family that'll be around your place most of the time.

3rdly, u sound like no be today this wahala start. For. u to kpokpo the young girl like means you've been low-key prepping for this moment.

well, na una sabi.. but then You guys should learn to accommodate each other or better yet learn how to talk things over as against being physical.

The humane part of me was about to call you out for putting your hands on your girlfriend to the extent she bled, but my karmic side of "do unto others what you expect to be done to you" is taking over my faculties.

Your girlfriend deserves everything she got for laying her hand on a defenceless 14yr old girl. Maybe in her next relationship, she will learn to keep those hands to herself to avoid a man putting his hands on her.

I said what I said.

You literally do not have any rights whatsoever to lay your hands on a woman.. She maliciously punished your niece and you did same to her, now tell me, what's the difference between you two?
You could have simply walk away from the relationship seeing the red flags already.

Cohabiting is a big NO and shouldn't have happened, then your niece coming into the picture wasn't advisable at all. You are only teaching her that cohabiting with a man who isn't her husband yet is acceptable and good.

Well, cancelling the wedding is the right thing to do.. You both don't deserve each other because from the look of things you're a man who finds it easy to beat a woman when provoked and not feel remorseful about it and she's a woman who doesn't know the value of one's family and a trouble personified woman.

Both of you should go your separate ways to avoid reading on social medias how a man either ended up in jail for beating his wife to death or how a woman poisoned her husband's niece.

Unnerve:
The humane part of me was about to call you out for putting your hands on your girlfriend to the extent she bled, but my karmic side of "do unto others what you expect to be done to you" is taking over my faculties.

Your girlfriend deserves everything she got for laying her hand on a defenceless 14yr old girl. Maybe in her next relationship, she will learn to keep her hands to herself to avoid a man putting his hands on her.

I said what I said.

....And you said the right thing. Supported.

.

Op
U have made a good decision.
Beating her was bad but just
end the relationship.

I can't tolerate women that have
domestic violence tendencies.
And they should not be condoned.

One day she will carry hot vegetable oil to
bath ur neice