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Should I Abandon My Dads Property? - Family - Nairaland

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Should I Abandon My Dads Property? by Guest911: 11:03pm On Aug 31, 2020
I’m not close to my dad, I was raised by a single mum till she passed away when I was 16.

My dad has been abroad since I can remember. But I still live in his house, with my cousins. My dad and I hardly talk, we can go 6 months no calls. So I see him as a stranger mostly. I can’t connect.

I have a really good job now. I have like N10M saved up, and earn about N2M monthly.

My plan is to relocate to Abuja and build my house, but my family members and friends thinks I would be foolish to just give up the property in Lagos with no conflict with my dad, as I have lived in the house with my mum my whole life.

But when I was younger he made it clear that this is his house and actually I don’t have access to the papers even.

But also I’m 25 now, I need to be a man after all my dad came to Lagos with nothing and built his house, I should do the same and cut off from him. That’s my only argument.

Is it foolish giving up this property worth about N45M.

2 Likes

Re: Should I Abandon My Dads Property? by bossvinqualad25(m): 11:08pm On Aug 31, 2020
You can come dash me the property I will forever be grateful to you, you can pick up your western union transfer at Nipost offices across the nation for more details call

1 Like

Re: Should I Abandon My Dads Property? by chiwetaluAGU(m): 11:35pm On Aug 31, 2020
Pride things
Re: Should I Abandon My Dads Property? by GoldenJAT(m): 11:39pm On Aug 31, 2020
Calm down bro! Continue saving,and always make sure u r a step ahead.
Re: Should I Abandon My Dads Property? by HiFreda(f): 11:50pm On Aug 31, 2020
Relocation should not result in giving up the property. Also know that abuja is not cheap and building costs time and money. So do not be in a haste to throw away what you already have.
If it is going to be empty, you can do minor renovation and put up for rent.

2 Likes

Re: Should I Abandon My Dads Property? by Guest911: 12:14am On Sep 01, 2020
HiFreda:
Relocation should not result in giving up the property. Also know that abuja is not cheap and building costs time and money. So do not be in a haste to throw away what you already have.
If it is going to be empty, you can do minor renovation and put up for rent.
I can renovate but my dad won’t let me rent the property. He doesn’t even let me access the shop attached to the house. So you get the gist
Re: Should I Abandon My Dads Property? by GboyegaD(m): 1:37am On Sep 01, 2020
Are you into your personal business or are you getting a transfer where you work otherwise, leaving Lagos for Abuja without a job that affords you the luxury you currently have will only lead to frustrations.

Also, did you try reaching out more to your dad and he is withdrawing? You need him at least for the father son relationship if possible. Do your bit and let him know what your expectations are.
Re: Should I Abandon My Dads Property? by mariahAngel(f): 1:46am On Sep 01, 2020
Guest911:
I’m not close to my dad, I was raised by a single mum till she passed away when I was 16.

My dad has been abroad since I can remember. But I still live in his house, with my cousins. My dad and I hardly talk, we can go 6 months no calls. So I see him as a stranger mostly. I can’t connect.

I have a really good job now. I have like N10M saved up, and earn about N2M monthly.

My plan is to relocate to Abuja and build my house, but my family members and friends thinks I would be foolish to just give up the property in Lagos with no conflict with my dad, as I have lived in the house with my mum my whole life.

But when I was younger he made it clear that this is his house and actually I don’t have access to the papers even.

But also I’m 25 now, I need to be a man after all my dad came to Lagos with nothing and built his house, I should do the same and cut off from him. That’s my only argument.

Is it foolish giving up this property worth about N45M.

Does he have other children?
How was he to you growing up?
Did he hurt you?
Do you respect and regard him now? Or you don't want anything from him or anything to do with him?

If you're his only child, you have the rights to that house before anyone else, after him. What he says can't change that.
Regardless of what he says or what you have or build for yourself in the future, that house is your inheritance, so don't give it up because of pride.

He can say whatever he wants, you didn't ask to be born, so the rights to inherit his property is yours first whether he likes it or not.
So, if it is offered to you, take it. If it is taken away from you unjustly when he's gone, fight for it. It's yours!

1 Like

Re: Should I Abandon My Dads Property? by Guest911: 2:19am On Sep 01, 2020
GboyegaD:
Are you into your personal business or are you getting a transfer where you work otherwise, leaving Lagos for Abuja without a job that affords you the luxury you currently have will only lead to frustrations.

Also, did you try reaching out more to your dad and he is withdrawing? You need him at least for the father son relationship if possible. Do your bit and let him know what your expectations are.
My job is based abroad and fully remote.

Reached out to him when I was 15-17yrs. The number became permanently on voicemail. He almost rented out the house twice while I lived there without my knowledge. My aunt discouraged him.

I resent him because he was invisible and I don’t connect with him. He barely knows me.

Imagine if he had rented out the house or I didn’t get a job, I would’ve been in the villa with a secondary school cert.

2 Likes

Re: Should I Abandon My Dads Property? by Guest911: 2:31am On Sep 01, 2020
mariahAngel:


Does he have other children?
How was he to you growing up?
Did he hurt you?
Do you respect and regard him now? Or you don't want anything from him or anything to do with him?

If you're his only child, you have the rights to that house before anyone else, after him. What he says can't change that.
Regardless of what he says or what you have or build for yourself in the future, that house is your inheritance, so don't give it up because of pride.

He can say whatever he wants, you didn't ask to be born, so the rights to inherit his property is yours first whether he likes it or not.
So, if it is offered to you, take it. If it is taken away from you unjustly when he's gone, fight for it. It's yours!
Im the first child but not the only. He’s got 3 other kids now.
The Oldest is 10years old.

No regard for him really. At the time I needed direction in life he wasn’t there. because sometimes it’s not about the money. But reflecting on the hardship with my mum and I alone. It just wasn’t fair.

3 Likes

Re: Should I Abandon My Dads Property? by GboyegaD(m): 3:45am On Sep 01, 2020
Guest911:

My job is based abroad and fully remote.

Reached out to him when I was 15-17yrs. The number became permanently on voicemail. He almost rented out the house twice while I lived there without my knowledge. My aunt discouraged him.

I resent him because he was invisible and I don’t connect with him. He barely knows me.

Imagine if he had rented out the house or I didn’t get a job, I would’ve been in the villa with a secondary school cert.

Why do you want to move to Abuja? If you have a good reason, then you can but if it is to move outside of Lagos, you could find a place where the standard of living is good at a lower cost.

Above all, please manage your funds well and beware of those who might want to give you suggestions on how to invest your funds.

2 Likes

Re: Should I Abandon My Dads Property? by TrippleEEE: 6:50am On Sep 01, 2020
If I were you, I'll move. The man no send you. He might need you later. But again, the ball is in your court. Just know you need to heal. Forgive him and forget him.

Clear your mind and grow.

1 Like

Re: Should I Abandon My Dads Property? by Tumbulum: 7:01am On Sep 01, 2020
You make 2m per month in Lagos and then you want to move to abuja to do what exactly. Stay in Lagos and keep saving and keep investing.
As for your dad property, its your dad that will decide what happens to it and not you.
Re: Should I Abandon My Dads Property? by mariahAngel(f): 9:25am On Sep 01, 2020
Guest911:
Im the first child but not the only. He’s got 3 other kids now.
The Oldest is 10years old.

No regard for him really. At the time I needed direction in life he wasn’t there. because sometimes it’s not about the money. But reflecting on the hardship with my mum and I alone. It just wasn’t fair.


Well, if it won't make you feel good or consoled inheriting the house, then there's no point.
I guess you don't want a situation where your father would think he has compensated you enough for not being part of your life when you needed him the most.

Do you have any relationship with your half siblings?
Re: Should I Abandon My Dads Property? by JBiden: 9:54am On Sep 01, 2020
As long as you are not with the papers, you cannot lay claim to the house.

Unless your father's Will later at the point of death states that the house should be yours then you have NO claim on that property.

I see people here advising you to drag property with someone you don't have any relationship with asides being your father, listen to them at your own detriment.

I won't be surprised if the man doesn't try to kill you if you make a move.

Move out, amass wealth(landed or otherwise) and enjoy peace of mind.

4 Likes

Re: Should I Abandon My Dads Property? by ecstasy357(m): 10:24am On Sep 01, 2020
Ok.... here to learn

Re: Should I Abandon My Dads Property? by Zino990(m): 11:01am On Sep 01, 2020
You’re really lucky, I wish I had quatar of what you had right now honestly
Cuz rn my life is a mess and I’m just 20 yrs old

I don’t know who might see this but I wanna be open cuz keeping things to my self hasn’t helped,
I know everyone has problems, but sometimes we can’t do it all on our own

The thing is I’ve been sick for a long time now,
But I don’t want to really disclose the illness, I have no body to assist me financially, cuz of my family background.
I’m been fighting this problem since last year,

since January I’ve been jobless
I have no savings

I really need the littlest financial help I can get from anyone right now
Even if you can show me how to get my own cash I would really appreciate
I’m tired of poverty and sickness

I don’t even know how I will cope when school resumes
My mum is dead
My dad is broke
My only sister ain’t even working right now but has graduated


Please any body
Some body
If you have a good heart please help your fellow human out
I don’t know what else to say that would move you to help me but if you do
God will definitely reward you and make you choose the right decisions
Thanks
Re: Should I Abandon My Dads Property? by tunjity26: 1:49pm On Sep 01, 2020
Guest911:
I’m not close to my dad, I was raised by a single mum till she passed away when I was 16.

My dad has been abroad since I can remember. But I still live in his house, with my cousins. My dad and I hardly talk, we can go 6 months no calls. So I see him as a stranger mostly. I can’t connect.

I have a really good job now. I have like N10M saved up, and earn about N2M monthly.

My plan is to relocate to Abuja and build my house, but my family members and friends thinks I would be foolish to just give up the property in Lagos with no conflict with my dad, as I have lived in the house with my mum my whole life.

But when I was younger he made it clear that this is his house and actually I don’t have access to the papers even.

But also I’m 25 now, I need to be a man after all my dad came to Lagos with nothing and built his house, I should do the same and cut off from him. That’s my only argument.

Is it foolish giving up this property worth about N45M.



Please i am a software developer and i am open to remote jobs tooo even if the salary is as low as 800k naira
Re: Should I Abandon My Dads Property? by mariahAngel(f): 2:59pm On Sep 01, 2020
tunjity26:




Please i am a software developer and i am open to remote jobs tooo even if the salary is as low as 800k naira

You are an opportunist and I don't mean that as a compliment. angry

Oloju kokoro ni e!

1 Like

Re: Should I Abandon My Dads Property? by mariahAngel(f): 3:01pm On Sep 01, 2020
[s]
Zino990:
You’re really lucky, I wish I had quatar of what you had right now honestly
Cuz rn my life is a mess and I’m just 20 yrs old

I don’t know who might see this but I wanna be open cuz keeping things to my self hasn’t helped,
I know everyone has problems, but sometimes we can’t do it all on our own

The thing is I’ve been sick for a long time now,
But I don’t want to really disclose the illness, I have no body to assist me financially, cuz of my family background.
I’m been fighting this problem since last year,

since January I’ve been jobless
I have no savings

I really need the littlest financial help I can get from anyone right now
Even if you can show me how to get my own cash I would really appreciate
I’m tired of poverty and sickness

I don’t even know how I will cope when school resumes
My mum is dead
My dad is broke
My only sister ain’t even working right now but has graduated


Please any body
Some body
If you have a good heart please help your fellow human out
I don’t know what else to say that would move you to help me but if you do
God will definitely reward you and make you choose the right decisions
Thanks
[/s]

Always resist the urge to lament!

1 Like

Re: Should I Abandon My Dads Property? by tunjity26: 3:48pm On Sep 01, 2020
mariahAngel:


You are an opportunist and I don't mean that as a compliment. angry

Oloju kokoro ni e!

what i do?
Re: Should I Abandon My Dads Property? by austine4real(m): 4:11pm On Sep 01, 2020
grin grin

U want to move because of??


It's better u stay and keep saving money

U can't just move to Abuja like that
Re: Should I Abandon My Dads Property? by ImaIma1(f): 4:33pm On Sep 01, 2020
Honestly, moving to Abuja is not a bad idea especially as you can afford to live there comfortably with your income and still save.

Moving out of your father's house doesn't mean you can't claim it when you have the papers, if it willed to you, etc.

As for the relationship with your father, it won't be easy to build that now since he was hardly there for you during your formative years. But you can try to call him more often and try to form a connection.
Re: Should I Abandon My Dads Property? by mariahAngel(f): 4:50pm On Sep 01, 2020
tunjity26:


what i do?

angry
Re: Should I Abandon My Dads Property? by Guest911: 5:41pm On Sep 01, 2020
Thank you guys for the input, honestly it went better than I expected.

Well I’ve decided to move on. If he has value in me then, I shouldn’t have to worry about the property, as he would simply do the needful. Either way I’ve come this far without him. God no go shame us.
Re: Should I Abandon My Dads Property? by frozen70(f): 6:15pm On Sep 01, 2020
Guest911:
I’m not close to my dad, I was raised by a single mum till she passed away when I was 16.

My dad has been abroad since I can remember. But I still live in his house, with my cousins. My dad and I hardly talk, we can go 6 months no calls. So I see him as a stranger mostly. I can’t connect.

I have a really good job now. I have like N10M saved up, and earn about N2M monthly.

My plan is to relocate to Abuja and build my house, but my family members and friends thinks I would be foolish to just give up the property in Lagos with no conflict with my dad, as I have lived in the house with my mum my whole life.

But when I was younger he made it clear that this is his house and actually I don’t have access to the papers even.

But also I’m 25 now, I need to be a man after all my dad came to Lagos with nothing and built his house, I should do the same and cut off from him. That’s my only argument.

Is it foolish giving up this property worth about N45M.

It depends on what you mean by giving up on his property

The earlier you start building your own the best for you

The property belongs to your dad and am very sure he has other children, so you don't know if it will be willed to you or to your steps
You can only have a claim to it if you have the paper with you
Re: Should I Abandon My Dads Property? by SweetCunt97(f): 6:19pm On Sep 01, 2020
Guest911:
I’m not close to my dad, I was raised by a single mum till she passed away when I was 16.

My dad has been abroad since I can remember. But I still live in his house, with my cousins. My dad and I hardly talk, we can go 6 months no calls. So I see him as a stranger mostly. I can’t connect.

I have a really good job now. I have like N10M saved up, and earn about N2M monthly.

My plan is to relocate to Abuja and build my house, but my family members and friends thinks I would be foolish to just give up the property in Lagos with no conflict with my dad, as I have lived in the house with my mum my whole life.

But when I was younger he made it clear that this is his house and actually I don’t have access to the papers even.

But also I’m 25 now, I need to be a man after all my dad came to Lagos with nothing and built his house, I should do the same and cut off from him. That’s my only argument.

Is it foolish giving up this property worth about N45M.
Did he drag the house with his father? Leave ur comfort zone and build ur own house ojare. How can u b earning 2m and have only 10m savings?
Re: Should I Abandon My Dads Property? by SweetCunt97(f): 6:20pm On Sep 01, 2020
austine4real:
grin grin

U want to move because of??


It's better u stay and keep saving money

U can't just move to Abuja like that
He can. He's a man
Re: Should I Abandon My Dads Property? by SweetCunt97(f): 6:21pm On Sep 01, 2020
Zino990:
You’re really lucky, I wish I had quatar of what you had right now honestly
Cuz rn my life is a mess and I’m just 20 yrs old

I don’t know who might see this but I wanna be open cuz keeping things to my self hasn’t helped,
I know everyone has problems, but sometimes we can’t do it all on our own

The thing is I’ve been sick for a long time now,
But I don’t want to really disclose the illness, I have no body to assist me financially, cuz of my family background.
I’m been fighting this problem since last year,

since January I’ve been jobless
I have no savings

I really need the littlest financial help I can get from anyone right now
Even if you can show me how to get my own cash I would really appreciate
I’m tired of poverty and sickness

I don’t even know how I will cope when school resumes
My mum is dead
My dad is broke
My only sister ain’t even working right now but has graduated


Please any body
Some body
If you have a good heart please help your fellow human out
I don’t know what else to say that would move you to help me but if you do
God will definitely reward you and make you choose the right decisions
Thanks
Be a man and go out there to do some hard job. Save save save.
Re: Should I Abandon My Dads Property? by SweetCunt97(f): 6:24pm On Sep 01, 2020
Tumbulum:
You make 2m per month in Lagos and then you want to move to abuja to do what exactly. Stay in Lagos and keep saving and keep investing.
As for your dad property, its your dad that will decide what happens to it and not you.
You think he goes to work everyday to earn such? Heard of remote jobs? People work from home to earn such. So him relocating means nothing.
Re: Should I Abandon My Dads Property? by Acehart: 6:34pm On Sep 01, 2020
Why not give any of the renowned estate management agencies to manage the property? They would give the proceeds accrued from rents to you; and you would have rest of mind because they will maintain the house.

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