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Men, Stop Bringing Nigerian Women Abroad! Another Sad Experience - Romance (2) - Nairaland

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Re: Men, Stop Bringing Nigerian Women Abroad! Another Sad Experience by bukatyne(f): 8:17pm On Sep 12, 2020
emkz:
When I was abroad and wanted to get married, I was advised to marry an abroad-based Nigerian woman who had an understanding of the workings of the system abroad, who understood that every penny must be worked for and every bill must be paid and failure would lead to a judicial process. Someone who would appreciate the value of £20 after understanding the sweat it takes to get it.

Many at times, girls at home are not really exposed and don't understand the dynamics of settling down abroad. They don't understand the struggles of sharing a house, budgeting for a month, eating bread with mayonnaise, pasta with mayonnaise, seeing things you cannot afford to buy, loneliness and worst of all, having no money and having no one to loan you. When she does not go through these struggles and comes abroad, she'd think life is a paradise when she see house and car. Then when she is befriended by one gbeborun, they'd fill her head with ideas that she can be independent at your expense. They then begin to launch a scheme to get you out of the way and take over your house. Even when they take over these houses, they forget they must pay all the bills to maintain the house: heating, electricity, land tax, council tax, gas and water bills; telephone bills, TV license, home contents insurance and house fire insurance. Let them have the house. Fight not to pay alimony. Within two years, they'd be forced to sell the house and na there their real struggle go start.

There are many high-flying women abroad who are well-to-do and well-mannered. Go to churches, they are there; go to local expats events like internations, they are there. You'd also find them at conferences, pay and go. If it becomes inevitable to bring a woman from Nigeria, get a pre-nup to protect yourself and your assets, don't be blinded by love. Some women cannot manage freedom. I remember when the UK police went to a church and took a Yoruba-speaking Nigerian to plead with Nigerian women to stop calling the police on their husbands.

@Bold:

Very sad.

While I cannot claim to fully understand why Nigerian men still want to come to their villages to pick wives, I am of the opinion that a foreign based Nigerian woman would make a better wife; she has seen it all and is not freaked by the 'freedom' the West has to offer.

Same way I think a Nigerian man bred in Nigeria would make a better husband than Westerner just coming to Nigeria. The Nigerian man was born and bred in this 'patriarchal' society that nothing freaks him. A Westerner just experiencing this 'freedom' wants to explore all it has to offer and push his limits.

The above of course are generalizations and peeps MIGHT behave differently.

11 Likes

Re: Men, Stop Bringing Nigerian Women Abroad! Another Sad Experience by emkz: 8:19pm On Sep 12, 2020
solonubinho:


Did you just say pasta and mayonnaise?? Yooh..whatt??

The thing made me very fat and my face was oily. I don't want to say much, but if folks tell you what they did abroad, you'd shed a tear. Some Nigerians are in paradise compared to their folks abroad...but they don't have a clue.

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Re: Men, Stop Bringing Nigerian Women Abroad! Another Sad Experience by Nobody: 8:27pm On Sep 12, 2020
MrBrownJay1:


Sadly most people to be blamed on these issues are these foolish MEN who want to ignore the law. Whether a woman comes from some Nigerian village or the bush, the minute you bring her to the west, she will rightfully turn into a western citizen and use the LAW to her advantage.
U have said it all.
I have stopped recommending NIGERIAN LADIES for marriage to diaspora men.
We see very terrible ones almost everyday.

I don comot my Hand tey tey and my FRIENDS are very sad with me.
They wouldn't understand.
The ones that reside in the US that want Nigerian Wives should go back and seek for such Ladies themselves.
COUNT me OUT.

I advise them to marry other tribes since such TROUBLES are lesser with tribes like Namibian, Kenyan, Indian, Pakistani, Filipino Ladies.

But of the AFRICAN descent, it is commonest among the Nigerian Ladies with my Igbo Ladies leading in the United States, especially the NURSES.
It appears they have Evil spirits as HODs of Nursing in their various facilities. (I just hope it's not so)
I don't know about the UK and ITALY.

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Re: Men, Stop Bringing Nigerian Women Abroad! Another Sad Experience by winkmart: 8:30pm On Sep 12, 2020
Wow! You did a good job posting this

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Re: Men, Stop Bringing Nigerian Women Abroad! Another Sad Experience by sisisioge: 8:31pm On Sep 12, 2020
It is well...when I pray that God only blesses us with fair people, "yellow" comes to some people's mind. It is really well.
Re: Men, Stop Bringing Nigerian Women Abroad! Another Sad Experience by Lorenzop: 8:38pm On Sep 12, 2020
Oracleforce:
I can never do this kind of mumu mistake...an average African lady is greedy...all my property will be in naija while we rent houses in abroad....if dem born dem well make demcome say make I leave my house for Naija because of one stupid woman....god punish oyinbo court judgment t

Hahahahaha, I swear down baba....me even if I bring my wife abroad, all my properties will be in my home country, abroad na rented apartment... If she misbehave...na to enter naija come marry another lady...thunder punish them...nonsense.....seriously why will our men not wise up if they must bring these ladies abroad?.... I will even have the bulk of my personal funds at home...all these ladies can't be trusted

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Re: Men, Stop Bringing Nigerian Women Abroad! Another Sad Experience by angelfallz(m): 8:48pm On Sep 12, 2020
bukatyne:


@Bold:

Very sad.

While I cannot claim to fully understand why Nigerian men still want to come to their villages to pick wives, I am of the opinion that a foreign based Nigerian woman would make a better wife; she has seen it all and is not freaked by the 'freedom' the West has to offer.

Same way I think a Nigerian man bred in Nigeria would make a better husband than Westerner just coming to Nigeria. The Nigerian man was born and bred in this 'patriarchal' society that nothing freaks him. A Westerner just experiencing this 'freedom' wants to explore all it has to offer and push his limits.

The above of course are generalizations and peeps MIGHT behave differently.

What freedom exactly, do women enjoy abroad that they don't enjoy in Nigeria?

4 Likes 1 Share

Re: Men, Stop Bringing Nigerian Women Abroad! Another Sad Experience by emkz: 8:48pm On Sep 12, 2020
daewoorazer:


Did u later marry a Nigerian lady based? Any regrets? What would you have done better if u can turn back the hands of time

I was unfortunate to be in a relationship with someone back home but we never quite got to the marital union. She calculated my earnings, deducted the costs of my rent, fuel and feeding, and requested I sent her the rest. She wanted to spend it on a lavish lifestyle to impress people and on her new relationship since I wasn't around. She was housing a man in a space I paid for and was trying to extort me (person wey I never marry oh). Imagine marrying such and taking her abroad. Na tears.

Well sha, I cut the relationship off because she was working at cross-purposes with me and teamed up with her boyfriend to deceive and extort me. She then promised to make my life miserable.

I am no longer abroad, but if I were, I'd marry a lady there, prepare a water-tight prenup and discuss the terms of disengagement should it ever come to that. That we are in a relationship does not mean I should be paying you for the rest of my life once the relationship ends. And except it is a woman whom you have been with for long and grew together in the relationship or someone you already married at home and she is still loyal to your vows as you can verify, I wouldn't advise any man to go and use his hand to carry a Nigerian-educated unexposed and ill-exposed girl and take her abroad for any reason. If you were Chinese, Korean, Japanese, Latino, Indian or Pakistani, I'd have advised you differently. But there is something fundamentally wrong with the African mind and I still can't dissect it.

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Re: Men, Stop Bringing Nigerian Women Abroad! Another Sad Experience by Stephenmoka4(m): 9:19pm On Sep 12, 2020
eh ya
Re: Men, Stop Bringing Nigerian Women Abroad! Another Sad Experience by Nobody: 9:31pm On Sep 12, 2020
To me in western countries,
Simps invented their laws
Cause how will a woman have upper hand than her husband?
See sometimes when I think of all this shit I use to give traveling abroad a second thought

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Re: Men, Stop Bringing Nigerian Women Abroad! Another Sad Experience by Nobody: 9:33pm On Sep 12, 2020
Men are the architect of their own misfortune.

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Re: Men, Stop Bringing Nigerian Women Abroad! Another Sad Experience by daewoorazer(m): 9:48pm On Sep 12, 2020
emkz:


I was unfortunate to be in a relationship with someone back home but we never quite got to the marital union. She calculated my earnings, deducted the costs of my rent, fuel and feeding, and requested I sent her the rest. She wanted to spend it on a lavish lifestyle to impress people and on her new relationship since I wasn't around. She was housing a man in a space I paid for and was trying to extort me (person wey I never marry oh). Imagine marrying such and taking her abroad. Na tears.

Well sha, I cut the relationship off because she was working at cross-purposes with me and teamed up with her boyfriend to deceive and extort me. She then promised to make my life miserable.

I am no longer abroad, but if I were, I'd marry a lady there, prepare a water-tight prenup and discuss the terms of disengagement should it ever come to that. That we are in a relationship does not mean I should be paying you for the rest of my life once the relationship ends. And except it is a woman whom you have been with for long and grew together in the relationship or someone you already married at home and she is still loyal to your vows as you can verify, I wouldn't advise any man to go and use his hand to carry a Nigerian-educated unexposed and ill-exposed girl and take her abroad for any reason. If you were Chinese, Korean, Japanese, Latino, Indian or Pakistani, I'd have advised you differently. But there is something fundamentally wrong with the African mind and I still can't dissect it.

Akiiiika

So u never marry like this...


I’m in a dilemma bro...
Be like “Baby daddy” wan make sense For my eye o

2 Likes

Re: Men, Stop Bringing Nigerian Women Abroad! Another Sad Experience by Nobody: 9:49pm On Sep 12, 2020
emkz:


I was unfortunate to be in a relationship with someone back home but we never quite got to the marital union. She calculated my earnings, deducted the costs of my rent, fuel and feeding, and requested I sent her the rest. She wanted to spend it on a lavish lifestyle to impress people and on her new relationship since I wasn't around. She was housing a man in a space I paid for and was trying to extort me (person wey I never marry oh). Imagine marrying such and taking her abroad. Na tears.

Well sha, I cut the relationship off because she was working at cross-purposes with me and teamed up with her boyfriend to deceive and extort me. She then promised to make my life miserable.

I am no longer abroad, but if I were, I'd marry a lady there, prepare a water-tight prenup and discuss the terms of disengagement should it ever come to that. That we are in a relationship does not mean I should be paying you for the rest of my life once the relationship ends. And except it is a woman whom you have been with for long and grew together in the relationship or someone you already married at home and she is still loyal to your vows as you can verify, I wouldn't advise any man to go and use his hand to carry a Nigerian-educated unexposed and ill-exposed girl and take her abroad for any reason. If you were Chinese, Korean, Japanese, Latino, Indian or Pakistani, I'd have advised you differently. But there is something fundamentally wrong with the African mind and I still can't dissect it.
You said your ex promised to make your life miserable. Did she fulfil her promise and how? grin
Re: Men, Stop Bringing Nigerian Women Abroad! Another Sad Experience by Nobody: 9:57pm On Sep 12, 2020
abegi let these men keep on getting oppressed by their arrangee naija based wives they brought abroad cheesy.at least when the women keep on dealing with them dem go get sense.the akata or white american woman or even naija women based in the states wont be any worse than the naija than the naija woman u bring over from nigeria.so why not settle for the bad instead of going for the worse.anyway whatever they like cheesy

3 Likes

Re: Men, Stop Bringing Nigerian Women Abroad! Another Sad Experience by bukatyne(f): 10:05pm On Sep 12, 2020
angelfallz:


What freedom exactly, do women enjoy abroad that they don't enjoy in Nigeria?

Freedom to dig for gold legally cheesy

11 Likes

Re: Men, Stop Bringing Nigerian Women Abroad! Another Sad Experience by bukatyne(f): 10:06pm On Sep 12, 2020
emkz:


I was unfortunate to be in a relationship with someone back home but we never quite got to the marital union. She calculated my earnings, deducted the costs of my rent, fuel and feeding, and requested I sent her the rest. She wanted to spend it on a lavish lifestyle to impress people and on her new relationship since I wasn't around. She was housing a man in a space I paid for and was trying to extort me (person wey I never marry oh). Imagine marrying such and taking her abroad. Na tears.

Well sha, I cut the relationship off because she was working at cross-purposes with me and teamed up with her boyfriend to deceive and extort me. She then promised to make my life miserable.

I am no longer abroad, but if I were, I'd marry a lady there, prepare a water-tight prenup and discuss the terms of disengagement should it ever come to that. That we are in a relationship does not mean I should be paying you for the rest of my life once the relationship ends. And except it is a woman whom you have been with for long and grew together in the relationship or someone you already married at home and she is still loyal to your vows as you can verify, I wouldn't advise any man to go and use his hand to carry a Nigerian-educated unexposed and ill-exposed girl and take her abroad for any reason. If you were Chinese, Korean, Japanese, Latino, Indian or Pakistani, I'd have advised you differently. But there is something fundamentally wrong with the African mind and I still can't dissect it.

grin cheesy
Re: Men, Stop Bringing Nigerian Women Abroad! Another Sad Experience by Nobody: 10:22pm On Sep 12, 2020
garugaru:
did you read the shît on front page where a man was ordered to pay spousal support to his ex-girlfriend? See the best is to do PAYG if preçk is scratching you.
except if the ex girlfriend has a child for him then he ought to pay spousal support but if no child then he"s not obliged to pay any spousal support to an ex girlfriend

2 Likes

Re: Men, Stop Bringing Nigerian Women Abroad! Another Sad Experience by JimmyDarmody: 10:22pm On Sep 12, 2020
iTroll:
I told my friends about the RP and the MGTOW movement and they thought I was crazy.
They fail to see the gynocentric society we live in nowadays. How the leftists have manipulated social engineering to the extent that people can't see beyond their noses.
The world is a large playground, yet most people chose to play in the sand mound at the middle of the play ground. (Relationships, love and sex)

Coincidence? I think not
I just took you seriously and I wanna know more about what you're trying to say. Pls.
Re: Men, Stop Bringing Nigerian Women Abroad! Another Sad Experience by solonubinho(m): 10:24pm On Sep 12, 2020
emkz:


The thing made me very fat and my face was oily. I don't want to say much, but if folks tell you what they did abroad, you'd shed a tear. Some Nigerians are in paradise compared to their folks abroad...but they don't have a clue.

Wow, sorry about that bro. I can't even imagine the taste. And meanwhile, family and friends in Nigeria will think that because you're fat, you must be enjoying smh. They'll start making excess financial demands, not caring what one is going through.

4 Likes

Re: Men, Stop Bringing Nigerian Women Abroad! Another Sad Experience by Nobody: 10:25pm On Sep 12, 2020
MrBrownJay1:


Why else would you think a man will travel across the world (back to Nigeria) to marry and bring over Nigerian women that are already present in the west?!
inferiority complex i guess.its just like some men who are educated will tell u that they only prefer moving with an illiterate or a village girl.

2 Likes

Re: Men, Stop Bringing Nigerian Women Abroad! Another Sad Experience by emkz: 10:26pm On Sep 12, 2020
Bikochi:

You said your ex promised to make your life miserable. Did she fulfil her promise and how? grin

Bro, I am not in the best position to interrogate her mind to have any clue how she's going to do it. I leave her to her conscience. Mine is to deflect her attacks and that I have full control over.

6 Likes

Re: Men, Stop Bringing Nigerian Women Abroad! Another Sad Experience by emkz: 10:29pm On Sep 12, 2020
solonubinho:


Wow, sorry about that bro. I can't even imagine the taste. And meanwhile, family and friends in Nigeria will think that because you're fat, you must be enjoying smh. They'll start making excess financial demands, not caring what one is going through.

grin grin grin grin
Re: Men, Stop Bringing Nigerian Women Abroad! Another Sad Experience by Nobody: 10:30pm On Sep 12, 2020
Oracleforce:
I can never do this kind of mumu mistake...an average African lady is greedy...all my property will be in naija while we rent houses in abroad....if dem born dem well make demcome say make I leave my house for Naija because of one stupid woman....god punish oyinbo court judgment t
if u are in the west its better u just marry there cos even if u go back to naija and marry and insist she stays back in naija she will just keep on cheating on u grin
all the money u will be sending for her maintanance she will be using it on her boyfriends grin grin

6 Likes

Re: Men, Stop Bringing Nigerian Women Abroad! Another Sad Experience by emkz: 10:33pm On Sep 12, 2020
daewoorazer:


Akiiiika

So u never marry like this...


I’m in a dilemma bro...
Be like “Baby daddy” wan make sense For my eye o

Marry because you want to. Be a baby daddy because you want to. Do what works best for you and makes you happy. Our African-American folks opt for the baby daddy ish, and it works for them. There are also many decent women who respect the marriage institution and would make good wives. Just don't be afraid to give them the chance.

4 Likes

Re: Men, Stop Bringing Nigerian Women Abroad! Another Sad Experience by Priam: 11:00pm On Sep 12, 2020
cry cry damn, this is pretty pathetic! You can actually feel the sadness and regrets in the man's words while the wife was purely being vindictive with the way she threw out the man's belongings out the 1st floor window embarassed

She even pour the guy water from her pot.. that's a razz mentality I saw a long time ago I'm the barracks

To even think that these two at a stage were in love and vowed to have each other's back in good and in bad; now this!

5 Likes

Re: Men, Stop Bringing Nigerian Women Abroad! Another Sad Experience by MrBrownJay1(m): 11:04pm On Sep 12, 2020
lefulefu:
inferiority complex i guess.its just like some men who are educated will tell u that they only prefer moving with an illiterate or a village girl.

Exactly... African Women abroad (who must work just as much as their husband) do not accept to be treated like some 2nd class citizen.... So these men look down on such women, and they prefer to go back to Nigeria to get some village woman who will act like the proper slave.... At least for a while until she adapts to western lifestyle.

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Re: Men, Stop Bringing Nigerian Women Abroad! Another Sad Experience by MrBrownJay1(m): 11:08pm On Sep 12, 2020
lefulefu:
except if the ex girlfriend has a child for him then he ought to pay spousal support but if no child then he"s not obliged to pay any spousal support to an ex girlfriend

Sadly, Whether with a child or not, a husband must pay spousal support to a wife who does not earn enough money to keep the lifestyle she is accustomed to, this man provided for her....same with common law union.

1 Like

Re: Men, Stop Bringing Nigerian Women Abroad! Another Sad Experience by kejykejy: 11:23pm On Sep 12, 2020
Chaii chai
What a painful experience
So painful

1 Like

Re: Men, Stop Bringing Nigerian Women Abroad! Another Sad Experience by elantraceey(f): 12:33am On Sep 13, 2020
Men are the architects of their own problem. What a pity.
Re: Men, Stop Bringing Nigerian Women Abroad! Another Sad Experience by Nobody: 12:59am On Sep 13, 2020
MrBrownJay1:


Sadly, Whether with a child or not, a husband must pay spousal support to a wife who does not earn enough money to keep the lifestyle she is accustomed to, this man provided for her....same with common law union.
i dont get it cheesy..so in europe if a guy breaks up in a relationship with a girl he would be forced by the govt to keep paying support money to her?? shocked grin
hell if tht was possible then many ladies wouldnt have bothered doing baby mama cheesy.it will just be simple as starting a relationship with a rich guy for one week and break up with him and govt would force the guy to be paying support money to her cheesy.now just imagine under 3 weeks a lady had broken relationship with 15 men and each ex is being forced by the govt to pay ten thousand euros each to the woman each week as spousal money.mehn dats cool cash cheesy . by the way have u heard dr dre"s ex wife is now demanding dr dre to be paying her 3 million dollars weekly cheesy?

2 Likes

Re: Men, Stop Bringing Nigerian Women Abroad! Another Sad Experience by Nobody: 1:07am On Sep 13, 2020
MrBrownJay1:


Exactly... African Women abroad (who must work just as much as their husband) do not accept to be treated like some 2nd class citizen.... So these men look down on such women, and they prefer to go back to Nigeria to get some village woman who will act like the proper slave.... At least for a while until she adapts to western lifestyle.
dats why i dont pity such men when the village woman they brought from africa now deals with them cheesy cheesy.good nigerian women are in europe and america but they run away from such women given excuses that they are too exposed and blah blah blah and that homebred women are traditional etc grin grin grin
anyway its mostly naija guys who have lost touch back home that tend to have such believes.i dont believe a guy who just left nigeria for europe or the US will now be going back to naija saying he is looking for a wife when there are women over there for him to choose.

3 Likes

Re: Men, Stop Bringing Nigerian Women Abroad! Another Sad Experience by MrBrownJay1(m): 1:26am On Sep 13, 2020
lefulefu:
dats why i dont pity such men when the village woman they brought from africa now deals with them cheesy cheesy.good nigerian women are in europe and america but they run away from such women given excuses that they are too exposed and blah blah blah and that homebred women are traditional etc grin grin grin
anyway its mostly naija guys who have lost touch back home that tend to have such believes.i dont believe a guy who just left nigeria for europe or the US will now be going back to naija saying he is looking for a wife when there are women over there for him to choose.

Well said, and the sad part is that, if these men broaden their horizon a little more, they will see so many women around them to choose from (other African women, African American women, white women, Latin, Asian etc) to be with... But sadly, for some reason, these men only want Nigeran women.

lefulefu:
i dont get it cheesy..so in europe if a guy breaks up in a relationship with a girl he would be forced by the govt to keep paying support money to her?? shocked grin
hell if tht was possible then many ladies wouldnt have bothered doing baby mama cheesy.it will just be simple as starting a relationship with a rich guy for one week and break up with him and govt would force the guy to be paying support money to her cheesy.now just imagine under 3 weeks a lady had broken relationship with 15 men and each ex is being forced by the govt to pay ten thousand euros each to the woman each week as spousal money.mehn dats cool cash cheesy . by the way have u heard dr dre"s ex wife is now demanding dr dre to be paying her 3 million dollars weekly cheesy?

It's the common law rules that stipulates that if you live long enough with someone unmarried, then in the eyes of the law, you guys are common law husband and wife, thus like married people, you will be forced to pay spousal support (if needs be). In most country, you guys need to be a couple living together in a committed r/ship for at least 2/3 years... But like the above, there are some special cases.

As for Dr Dre, I wrote about it below:
DrDre's wife is entitled to half his wealth...according to the LAW.... So, Until their divorce is finalized, he must give her enough money monthly so that she can continue living the lifestyle she has been accustomed to.. And yes, if she was making monthly donations under her name, then she will possibly be entitled to that as well. Remember, when they got married, DrDre was worth just about $10M, now he is worth more thAn $800M so wife will definitely get a divorce settlement of no less than $200/300M (if they didn't have a tight prenup in place)

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