iCauseTrouble:
There should be a change in marriage contract in the world and especially in Nigeria. Modern marriage contract should be for like 5 years with an option of renewal. If you enjoy it, you renew, if not, you leave and look for another partner

And leave the children miserable , hurt and confused!
Divorce doesn't affect only two people o

shadeyinka2:

And leave the children miserable , hurt and confused!

Forget that emotional blackmail.. Its getting out of date!!


Aren't children confused or hurt when all they see is mummy and daddy fighting all day..


.

well, I'm not planning for any marriage sha. no need for filing any bullshitt.

na baby mama level I dey plan now.
no time for nonsense

Do you have an experience with divorce?

shadeyinka2:

And leave the children miserable , hurt and confused!
Divorce doesn't affect only two people o

If not for incompatibility in some marriages, divorce is never an option because it has its disadvantages.
May God help every homes.... Amen!

HealthDiary:


Source: https://www.opinions.com.ng/2020/10/how-to-file-for-divorce-in-nigeria.html

Thanks for sharing.. what about Legal separation? what is the process for this in Nigeria? are there limitations? which is faster to achieve? pros and cons?

iCauseTrouble:
Do you have an experience with divorce?

I've seen so many with disastrous effect on the children.

thebosstrevor1:


For disagreeing with you, i revealed my animalistic trait.

Imagine.

Seriously you have a lowself esteem.

Africans with lowself esteem starts everything with how Africans are this and that, every thing negative.

I had to reveal your disease before it ruin you.

What are you blabbing about? Marriages to African Women is like hitting a jackpot. A ticket to be taken care of for life. Its about love for money. Stop deceiving yourself.

Tedpgrass:


Forget that emotional blackmail.. Its getting out of date!!


Aren't children confused or hurt when all they see is mummy and daddy fighting all day..


.

And instead of daddy and mummy growing up to maturity and owning up to their responsibilities, they throw tantrums about not caring about the innocent children. After all, the children were not there when the were swearing for better for worse

Dsimple:
Hmmmmmm I should have create a thread for this, but I'm still considering my options. I am or was married with one lady and she absconds from my house, stealing everything she could carried along with her including my ATM card and withdrawing all the money in the account and still left with our son of three years old. It's been more than one year since this happened. Her mother is threatening me with jail terms if I don't produce her daughter and she is now telling me that the boy is not mine. I had it from good authority that she is with her mum in Lagos while I'm staying at Abuja. The marriage was contracted in Jos, plateau state. Her dad is late and her mother has since sold the house where the marriage took place. I really need to get my son back as soon as possible.

Firstly, don't take any thought to resorting to self help as you will be found guilty if you do. Take a look at Davido's daughter Imade who was about to be taken abroad without the mother's consent. The plan was aborted when when the mum alerted the authorities. If it had not been resolved amicably, davido would have been facing a case of kidnapping despite the girl being his own daughter.

This is because in a lot of countries including our very own nigeria, a mother's consent is paramount and especially in a case of under aged kids, winning custody is very tricky and hardly given to the man unless the woman is seen as a threat to the child's welfare or as irresponsible. While the love may have waned between the two of you, the wellbeing of the child of not raised in a poisonous environment should not happen. You might want to take claim of your wife's actions as irresponsible but it is not above your limit to forego the money. Afterall, it is your child the money would be used to take care of. I implore you to overlook the manner the money was taken.

Personally, I think you should be appreciative of your wife leaving rather than letting discontent make her live with you only to otapiapia you one night. It is funny that some people are so mindful of the shame of divorce to the extent that they prefer killing their spouse over facing public ridicle. Your wife probably has another man and with the way her mum is acting, probably a rich one for that matter. Just don't drag woman issue here.

The only part about things is your boy. You can instigate a divorce proceeding and one of your pleas would be to have visitation rights to your son considering that judges would give the woman preference on child matters. It would be even okay if your wife gives a response of mutual divorce and you guys agree to visitation rights that would be spelt out. If she disagree to this would be when you can as well ask the court for full custody with a backup of visitation right should the court deny your your first request. Your lawyer will know how to draft this. You can also ask the court to compel her to consent to a DNA test and monitor the result if she insists about you not owning the child. She might be right. Keep that in perspective.

Concerning mama, give her a call that you want to file a missing persons report in your state and you would like her to come over to write her statement. The manner of how you met the house is suspicious of you being robbed and you want to set the police on the track of the robber. They will be tracking pictures of ATM withdrawals which will lead to catching who robbed you. Her response will tell you what you need to know. I expect you will be getting a call from your wife pretty soon.

Don't let the boy grow up disoriented. If you know your wife will keep him safe, no need going in guns blazing. Remember, she was once your beloved when you were both younger and more innocent. Take things easy.

Still, watch your back.

Wishing you well - Teemy

What about those that didn't do marriage, but are staying together with their kids. What's the process of separation?

Abiababe:
Thanks for the information, really helpful.

don't divorce ur husband pls. I can be of help to u. Contact me

shadeyinka2:

And instead of daddy and mummy growing up to maturity and owning up to their responsibilities, they throw tantrums about not caring about the innocent children. After all, the children were not there when the were swearing for better for worse

It is what it is.
I'm not in support of the current trends but it is what it is.

People are getting more and more selfish in recent times..... and often letting go is the only way to keep one's sanity. Avoiding unnecessary rancour and in extreme cases, bloodshed.


Expectations are so unreal... The dogmatism often expressed is blinding... In my humble opinion, in some cases, It was a car crash waiting to happen, if you assess the life partner choices of certain people.

.

Didi2d:
What about those that didn't do marriage, but are staying together with their kids. What's the process of separation?

Simply take a walk...
But sort out child visitation rights as mothers are by default, guardians

The law isn't mature here for financial rights in the case of cohabitation.

However, if there's been a traditional wedding, in some cultures--an introduction ceremony may suffice - - then the law is applied along the same lines as stated above.. Is what I'm aware of..

BUT Let's await the opinion of the legal luminaries


.

MrNipplesLover:
well, I'm not planning for any marriage sha.
no need for filing any bullshitt.


na baby mama level I dey plan now.

no time for nonsense

Get your legal paperwork in place

The girls are getting wiser and upgrading
Everyday SM is littered with pictures of BMs wanting to bankrupt their Baby daddies.

Learn lessons from the drama unfolding from certain prominent musicians


Get your paperwork in place.. Its a contract with obligations on both parts-- a pre-nup of sorts

Otherwise its years of rancour and court visits.

I expect things will get harder in the next few years in this area for well-heeled fathers who are neglecting their duties as regards their offspring.


.

Tedpgrass:


Get your legal paperwork in place

The girls are getting wiser and upgrading
Everyday SM is littered with pictures of BMs wanting to bankrupt their Baby daddies.

Learn lessons from the drama unfolding from certain prominent musicians


Get your paperwork in place.. Its a contract with obligations on both parts-- a pre-nup of sorts

Otherwise its years of rancour and court visits.

I expect things will get harder on the coming years in this area for well-heeled fathers who are neglecting their duties as regards their offspring.


.

na because u don't know me u dey talk this.



well, I dey with u sha.

mrkings84:
In a union ordained by God Himself, divorce is a NO NO!!

Be there deceiving yourself... Even divorce on the ground of adultery/domestic violence was approved in the bible

. That both parties have lived apart for a continuous period of at least two years immediately preceding the presentation of the petition.

f. That both parties have lived apart for a continuous period of at least 3 years immediately preceding the presentation of the petition.

g. That both parties have, for a period of not less than 1 year failed to comply with restitution of conjugal rights made under the Act of the law. Still learner no meaning on the post [color=#990000][/color]

Oracleforce:
African marriage is a scam... You can hardly see genuine love in African marriage...it is either the man is exploiting the woman or otherwise. ...

The leeching and preying mentality have destroyed so.many relationships or marriages..
And that is the reason you can see a lasting marriage.

GBAM

mrkings84:
In a union ordained by God Himself, divorce is a NO NO!!

if u are married to a psychotic partner and u want to break for the safety of ur life even God go understand

Step 6
Your petition will be given a file number in the family court division once your petition has been filled successfully. Your partner will be given a certain number of days to respond to the petition. He/she is given the right to either agree or disagree to dissolve the marriage.


If the responder/partner agrees to the petition, my question is will he/she still needs the judge to hear the case in court or it's automatic divorce afterwards, maybe a letter will be serve afterwards or sumthing

Plead:


This is confusing. Explain it to her.

Don't make the mistake to think any judge will give you 50% or more like they do in Europe and America.
I've followed up many divorce cases and you usually get what you put in. Meaning, you'll get property that is proportionate to what you contributed or that you bought by yourself unlike in the West where everything is automatically shared.
If you can't provide evidence that you contributed to acquire a particular stuff, you won't be given a part of it,not even 0.99%.

As for money settlement? I've seen judges award money settlement many times though it's not as bogus as the ones in the West. A man/woman can be worth 50m and the court will tell him/her to settle his/her lesser earning wife/husband with 100-500k.

Reason for filling for divorce and the petitioner also matters.

What do you mean by contribution?

You work while she take care of children. This is equal job under the law assuming she is a house wife. You rendered her dream impotent and is here misinterpreting contributions.

As I said earlier, everything gotten after marriage is sharable just that the proportion is done with potentials in view.

Can anyone help me with a contact of good divorce lawyer.

samguru78@gmail.com

Tedpgrass:


Simply take a walk...
But sort out child visitation rights as mothers are by default, guardians

The law isn't mature here for financial rights in the case of cohabitation.

However, if there's been a traditional wedding, in some cultures--an introduction ceremony may suffice - - then the law is applied along the same lines as stated above.. Is what I'm aware of..

BUT Let's await the opinion of the legal luminaries


.

Look,
Thanks, I have been considering taken a walk. The relationship isn't working at all

thesicilian:

Is there a minimum number of times or duration that sex has to be refused, because going by refusal alone, we can say that almost every marriage is qualified for divorce.

I believe that's why it says PERSISTENTLY as in it has to have been a lot of times

Oracleforce:
African marriage is a scam... You can hardly see genuine love in African marriage...it is either the man is exploiting the woman or otherwise. ...

The leeching and preying mentality have destroyed so.many relationships or marriages..
And that is the reason you can see a lasting marriage.

@ the bolded...that just contradicts everything you typed

MadamExcellency:


What do you mean by contribution?

You work while she take care of children. This is equal job under the law assuming she is a house wife. You rendered her dream impotent and is here misinterpreting contributions.

As I said earlier, everything gotten after marriage is sharable just that the proportion is done with potentials in view.

Why do you assume in every settings, the man works while woman sits at home to take care of children? Who still does that sef?

Share indeed. Continue deceiving yourself even footmatch you won't see to share. Women who argue about things like these are mostly women that didn't contribute 0kobo to acquire any property yet want to reap where they didn't show thinking Nigeria is Europe, you'll be shocked..

samguru:
Can anyone help me with a contact of good divorce lawyer.

samguru78@gmail.com

Ask @Queenfav, @litigator and @lawyer.

JIMMY1393:


I believe that's why it says PERSISTENTLY as in it has to have been a lot of times

Persistently is not a definitive terms, neither is "a lot of times". I know why I asked. Thanks for trying to answer though.

Didi2d:


Look,
Thanks, I have been considering taken a walk. The relationship isn't working at all

Good luck man

Realistically take a short break, make it amiable and take a very good look at things

You both may just need some space to reappraise..

Identify any couple goals that have been achieved and compare visavis the areas of concerns.
On balance, make a decision..


Pls remember that the grass always appear greener on the other side. Compromise and managing each other's deficiencies is key to a successful relationship.


Good luck..


.

At what point did the govt. Have so much control over our marital life.

Did Adam and eve have a marriage certificate?

Plead:


Why do you assume in every settings, the man works while woman sits at home to take care of children? Who still does that sef?

[s]Share indeed. Continue deceiving yourself even footmatch you won't see to share. Women who argue about things like these are mostly women that didn't contribute 0kobo to acquire any property yet want to reap where they didn't show thinking Nigeria is Europe, you'll be shocked..[/s]

Please, keep your presumptions and emotional tantrums aside. I am a career professional.

The divorce law is meant to protect the weak notwithstanding the sex hence my analogy of "presumed innocent" housewife who is generally the weakest in the game of legal relationship

You think we are in 19th century? Go back and consult law journals and court reviews to understand the purpose of divorce settlements.

Properties my foot. Properties that can be sold and yet can't solve a problem housewives prevent. Do you know because of my absence from home for work. My last born has damaged our belongings and that of others amounting to several millions which wouldn't have happened had I choose to stay home as housewife?