If your fiancé says you will be responsible for family feeding, every utensils needed in the kitchen, pay part of house rent, Children's school fees and contribute money for family investment, would you marry him? Pls note "family feeding " and the discussion came up after you had picked a wedding date. A young lady just called me this morning to share her worries with me. How would you advice her?

tenry:
If your fiancé says you will be responsible for family feeding, every utensils needed in the kitchen, pay part of house rent, Children's school fees and contribute money for family investment, would you marry him? Pls note "family feeding " and the discussion came up after you had picked a wedding date. A young lady just called me this morning to share her worries with me. How would you advice her?

Could be she's a diehard feminist and her fiance is just trying to respect her equality.

Is the man an handicap Ni? which sane man does that. or Na she dey marry the man ni?
the list isn't complete, he should add bathing him n the children.
even if she is receiving ₦100k it won't even foot the bill for all that considering the present state of the country.

he will just end up driving her into accumulated debts and High blood pressure.

final note. that boy is not ready for marriage. better to end it now before had I known.

tenry:
If your fiancé says you will be responsible for family feeding, every utensils needed in the kitchen, pay part of house rent, Children's school fees and contribute money for family investment, would you marry him? Pls note "family feeding " and the discussion came up after you had picked a wedding date. A young lady just called me this morning to share her worries with me. How would you advice her?

The guy dey craze.

I don't blame some guys though. When some girls be acting like super man or like marriage is an oxygen they need at all cost to survive. Why won't the guy take avantage and start dishing out responsibilities to her.

A woman should come in as a helpmeet and not the sole provider or on a 50/50 shared responsibilities. Let him take up the mantle as the leader of the home and let the woman help where necessary.

Tell, she'll not be able to cope with all that crap. So it's either the guy assume his responsibilities in the home or she opts out. Marriage is not a testing ground. It's for life. Once you are in, you are in.

The husband is a smart guy


Anyways, tell your friend that I trust her to still outsmart the smart guy who's dumb enough to marry a 21st century lady

One thing I've know about women is: they won't stay in the marriage if the guy really outsmarts them... So she could go for it.

LeeSantos:
Is the man an handicap Ni? which sane man does that. or Na she dey marry the man ni?
the list isn't complete, he should add bathing him n the children.
even if she is receiving ₦100k it won't even foot the bill for all that considering the present state of the country.

he will just end up driving her into accumulated debts and High blood pressure.

final note. that boy is not ready for marriage. better to end it now before had I known.

Exactly my advice this morning. Broken relationship is better than broken marriage.

She should walk run from a man like this. As in, take off her heels and Usain Bolt away from him.

She should ask him if he will share with her 50/50 during pregnancy, breast-feeding, child nurturing and share the pain when she put-to-bed. Also, he must share in domestic activities regardless if he is the bread winner. Men and women are different, and its easier when men and women thrive in things they do better.

This is the misunderstanding of equality by the man because many people conflate equality of opportunities with equality of outcome, lots of irresponsible people will use it as a cover to evade responsibilities. Lots of men understand contributions from a woman to be only material (cash), while being oblivious to the other contributions only a woman has to do such as pregnancy and breastfeeding.

I mean, how can a woman respect you if after she contends with all the difficulties of bearing and nurturing a child, she also still has to contend with the outside world to hustle for cash? I'll never respect such a man, or feel attracted to him if I'm a woman. Never. A truly masculine man will not even dream of asking such a ridiculous question and will work extra harder to provide for his family, just as a woman will not employ the service of surrogacy to be pregnant for a man she loves.

I feel sorry for women these days, you'll have to deal with so many man-child who can't be an equal complementary partner, where both of your tie the rope of your existence and navigate the chaos of life stronger. Instead, the partners become the chaos itself. Sad.

Is that marriage or a kinda live-in contract?
Try find out fess before we begin advise her.

Nothing wrong with a woman taking up part of the financial responsibilities in home but a man giving these conditions is a bit of a red flag.
It tells what kind of man he'll be beyond just the issue of taking responsibilities.

She's not yet married to him.She should use her tongue to count her teeth.

A waving red flag. Tell her she neva see husband o, she should keep walking....

Well I don't know much about Nigerian family rules


But outside Africa, in the western world

Example...

I work, my wife work also..
I make $9k, she make $7k /months

I Know the bills to cover
She knows her bills to cover

At the end of the day... Savings go to joint account if that's neccassary...

Wife don't depend on husband unless she's on maternity leave which can last for about 6 months or 8 months and still definitely get paid...

tenry:
If your fiancé says you will be responsible for family feeding, every utensils needed in the kitchen, pay part of house rent, Children's school fees and contribute money for family investment, would you marry him? Pls note "family feeding " and the discussion came up after you had picked a wedding date. A young lady just called me this morning to share her worries with me. How would you advice her?

It's not by force she gets married.

Hanty want to marry liability

After 2years of marriage with marital and financial pressure dumped on her she'll now be looking like a stressed out 65 year old woman

They want to use wedding to hook her the way those little fools use pregnancy to hook senseless men into marrying them

Now let me ask you a question,in that marriage (gbese) you open eyes and want to enter, WHAT'S IN IT FOR YOU? AS IN WHAT ARE YOUR BENEFITS because the man has weighed his cost but you haven't
. when you get married you'll carry all the financial expenses yet all your kids will bear his surname while you keep slaving away to keep the family afloat financially

Do you even know how expensive things are in the market?

12 kg gas is ₦5000
Baby clothes is ₦25,000
School fees is ₦100,000
Washing machine ₦75,000
Baby walker ₦80,000
Except you want to carry your kids to adewumi primary school with semi illiterate teachers who will be teaching your children

Ajankolokolo,eleshinshin lori and then be carrying your children to shalanga to go and poop.


Hanty you don't need nairaland advice,you need COMMON SENSE!

your case is dismissed, that's all!


Next!

I hope she'll be the one to pay the bride Price

Shortyy:
I hope she'll be the one to pay the bride Price

Shortyy:
I hope she'll be the one to pay the bride Price

The guy must be joking.



I hope she isn't footing the whole wedding rites and expenses?


Iru okunrin be ora alubarika fun ara re

tenry:
If your fiancé says you will be responsible for family feeding, every utensils needed in the kitchen, pay part of house rent, Children's school fees and contribute money for family investment, would you marry him? Pls note "family feeding " and the discussion came up after you had picked a wedding date. A young lady just called me this morning to share her worries with me. How would you advice her?

Cancel date na. Is it so hard?

roteblomen:
She should ask him if he will share with her 50/50 during pregnancy, breast-feeding, child nurturing and share the pain when she put-to-bed. Also, he must share in domestic activities regardless if he is the bread winner. Men and women are different, and its easier when men and women thrive in things they do better.

This is the misunderstanding of equality by the man because many people conflate equality of opportunities with equality of outcome, lots of irresponsible people will use it as a cover to evade responsibilities. Lots of men understand contributions from a woman to be only material (cash), while being oblivious to the other contributions only a woman has to do such as pregnancy and breastfeeding.

I mean, how can a woman respect you if after she contends with all the difficulties of bearing and nurturing a child, she also still has to contend with the outside world to hustle for cash? I'll never respect such a man, or feel attracted to him if I'm a woman. Never. A truly masculine man will not even dream of asking such a ridiculous question and will work extra harder to provide for his family, just as a woman will not employ the service of surrogacy to be pregnant for a man she loves.

I feel sorry for women these days, you'll have to deal with so many man-child who can't be an equal complementary partner, where both of your tie the rope of your existence and navigate the chaos of life stronger. Instead, the partners become the chaos itself. Sad.

You are a manly man

If its true, she has not met her husband..


She too should tell the husband that the house chores will be done by both of them on weekly basis.


African men becoming wives every second.

It's a simple formula, anyone that brings in the chunk of money does less house chores.
If the bill is split equally, then the chores will be split equally. I'd rather bring in much more with reduced house chores.