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What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex - Romance (2) - Nairaland

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Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by Nobody: 10:12am On Dec 12, 2020
Descortes:
avoid me please. Thank you
Do same little boy
Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by Liposure: 10:15am On Dec 12, 2020
Zzor:
You can't have everything in life, manage her like that at least she's perfect in other areas
ah! Zzor now
Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by Nobody: 10:17am On Dec 12, 2020
Liposure:
ah! Zzor now
It's the truth
Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by Camelot65: 10:17am On Dec 12, 2020
CalliDora1:
Is it food?

I don't know what is wrong with this generation and sex. Mtcheeewww
So, would you advice him to go ahead and marry her knowing she's not into sex?

Lol una funny ooo
Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by DukeJoe17: 10:19am On Dec 12, 2020
Kenog4real:
Hi NLders
Please mind my grammars. I have a lot to write but I'm just gonna go straight to the point.
My girlfriend/wife to be happens to be a rape victim. Thou we've been dating for almost 3years and by God's grace, we are working towards our wedding. The thing there is that there are issues with our sex lives. Due to her past experience, it's most times hard to have pleasing, fun and great sex. I met her to be someone not into sex because she told me she uses hot water to calm herself whenever she's in the mood; although she has a way to do things and we both climax almost together without penetration. Her reason for not giving in to sex is that there is always a flashback when it happens. As a man, you know getting inside the V and doing it as one like is the koko. By the time we started the main thing (sex)after months, I found out I don't last again and at the same time I don't satisfy her. Whenever we wanna do anything, the only pre-intimacy allowed most time is from the neck to the tummy region. Every other place is a no go/touch area(her excuse is that she get irritated and also scared of infection) except I wanna get in and also there is this facial expression from her that always makes me feel guilty and at the same loose focus which sometimes turns me off or makes me nut on time when things gets serious. I've always felt maybe it's the tightness, what we've both been doing before we started having normal sex that is affecting me or the issue is from me. I've tried to bring up the issue so we talk about it but it's always ends with 'I don't like talking about sex'. I brought up the idea of her going online to read up somethings about it so we know how to help each other, its still to no avail. During the lock down, we were home together for 5 months plus, there was nothing like sex.
I've not taken all these too serious because we aren't officially married yet and also I feel I might bring back her past, but I don't want all these to affect the both of us when we finally get married.
She's a decent, hard working, helping, and a supportive lady. In fact she worked my way out of Nigeria with her and we have been staying together since then.

My people, please what do I do. How do I tackle this because we are working towards our wedding already.
She doesn't cheat likewise myself.
.

She is ashamed going down with you, as in she thinks that you are inferior to her,
Get out of that bondage if not she will walk one day whenever a higher bidder comes around.
You are not her first choice and she will bleep her kind of men while having your ring on her finger poo.❌❌❌❌❌❌

1 Like

Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by Nobody: 10:20am On Dec 12, 2020
Camelot65:
So, would you advice him to go ahead and marry her knowing she's not into sex?

Lol una funny ooo

Read my complete comment. There are so many probable causes for her actions. Check my comment again.
Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by Camelot65: 10:21am On Dec 12, 2020
Your only hope in that marriage is to forfeit s3x....which is not possible..

This might even cause problems in your marriage.

Everyone should get married to someone sexually compatible with them, if not na suffer you go suffer
Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by Liposure: 10:24am On Dec 12, 2020
hashtagged:
I wonder which other dick that is chopping that puna. Simple you disgust her that's the only reason, if a lady loves you whether she likes it or not she would do it.

Later when I say ladies are not supposed to like sex una go dey talk
have you been reading my mind
Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by Ezi1993(f): 10:26am On Dec 12, 2020
Womanizer:
Run!
Run to where?? Is marriage just about sex only??..please if you have no reasonable advice to give..just keep ur hand off the keypad.
Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by Camelot65: 10:29am On Dec 12, 2020
CalliDora1:
Is it food?

I don't know what is wrong with this generation and sex. Mtcheeewww

Now... There are so many things responsible for her lack of interest in penetration.

Firstly.. she's scared of infection (according to you) and that alone can make a lady refuse penetration until she's sure about her partner.

Secondly: you said she can climax by doing things to herself. Hmmm.. this alone can make a woman lose interest in the actual thing especially if she can no longer achieve climax with sex. She'll rather go with the former.

Lastly, you guys are not yet married and that could be the reason she's not willing to give her all for fear of being dumped afterwards. I don't want to believe the rape experience is the major reason for refusing you sex if not, she won't even get down with you at all for pre-intimacy. With marriage she'll loosen up. Trust me!
With your second point, I doubt Your last statement would be feasible in marriage.....

She'll definitely lose interest in the whole penetration thingy even after wedding

1 Like

Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by DukeJoe17: 10:32am On Dec 12, 2020
Frustrated007:
My brother, you won't believe how liberated I felt the day I discovered this truth!

It was as if a huge weight was lifted off my body.
The wiser you become the more you see that modern men are practically slaves to these creatures!

We kill ourselves for them, fight useless wars for them, commit the most horrible crimes just to please them and yet these creatures are never satisfied and keep demanding more!
It's sickening!!


How I wish thousand of men will wake up from their slumber.
Thanks for keeping the truth.

I love men who have gotten the truth thereby reclaiming the space from ungrateful gender.

4 Likes

Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by Nobody: 10:35am On Dec 12, 2020
Camelot65:
With your second point, I doubt Your last statement would be feasible in marriage.....

She'll definitely lose interest in the whole penetration thingy even after wedding





Yeah.. I forgot to add that he should bring that to her knowledge and try to discourage it. He should alsoake her see reasons why.

A lawyer friend disclosed this to me a long time ago.

1 Like 1 Share

Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by Liposure: 10:46am On Dec 12, 2020
You will have yourself to blame if you walk into that marriage with your eyes closed. Sexual compatibility is very essential. Don't joke with it
Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by muller101(m): 10:50am On Dec 12, 2020
After reading most comments from ladies on this thread. I have come to a conclusion that all of them here are useless.

6 Likes

Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by Judybash93(m): 10:59am On Dec 12, 2020
Seek professional help
Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by Nobody: 10:59am On Dec 12, 2020
muller101:
After reading most comments from ladies on this thread. I have come to a conclusion that all of them here are useless.


Shhhhhhh...

Go back to bed. It's too early.
Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by Nobody: 11:00am On Dec 12, 2020
Liposure:
You will have yourself if you walk into that marriage with your eyes closed. Sexual compatibility is very essential. Don't joke with it
Is marriage all about sex? atleast she compliment him on other sides
Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by toye440: 11:03am On Dec 12, 2020
Zzor:
When they take all sorts of rubbish, what do you expect from them?
Zzor my love, we dont take rubbish, its a gift from God. Even Abraham still they chuk at 100 yrs and begat Isaac so what is wrong asking for good sex.

1 Like

Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by Angelacruz: 11:06am On Dec 12, 2020
Premium tears loading
Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by Nobody: 11:10am On Dec 12, 2020
toye440:
Zzor my love, we dont take rubbish, its a gift from God. Even Abraham still they chuk at 100 yrs and begat Isaac so what is wrong asking for good sex.
Abraham and others at that time lived a healthy lifestyle, can you say the same now?
Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by Liposure: 11:13am On Dec 12, 2020
Zzor:
Is marriage all about sex? atleast she compliment him on other sides
marriage without sex is like tea without sugar
Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by toye440: 11:19am On Dec 12, 2020
Lol, U mean she wants to only use for excretion? chai the devil is a liar.
Now my 2 cents. Bro 9ja girl work way for u out of this country, and perfect in every endeavour except that u dont get to test her humidity constantly.
Brother come closer, lay ur hands on ur prick and repeat after me; say " father !!! every alakoba in my life, let them be uprooted ".
But if pounding the pu.na.ni pavement is still ur priority guy i no mind exchange Zzor for ur bae, I bet she go satisfy ur life but ....hmmm.
Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by dannex4adx(m): 11:20am On Dec 12, 2020
Kenog4real:
Hi NLders
Please mind my grammars. I have a lot to write but I'm just gonna go straight to the point.
My girlfriend/wife to be happens to be a rape victim. Thou we've been dating for almost 3years and by God's grace, we are working towards our wedding. The thing there is that there are issues with our sex lives. Due to her past experience, it's most times hard to have pleasing, fun and great sex. I met her to be someone not into sex because she told me she uses hot water to calm herself whenever she's in the mood; although she has a way to do things and we both climax almost together without penetration. Her reason for not giving in to sex is that there is always a flashback when it happens. As a man, you know getting inside the V and doing it as one like is the koko. By the time we started the main thing (sex)after months, I found out I don't last again and at the same time I don't satisfy her. Whenever we wanna do anything, the only pre-intimacy allowed most time is from the neck to the tummy region. Every other place is a no go/touch area(her excuse is that she get irritated and also scared of infection) except I wanna get in and also there is this facial expression from her that always makes me feel guilty and at the same loose focus which sometimes turns me off or makes me nut on time when things gets serious. I've always felt maybe it's the tightness, what we've both been doing before we started having normal sex that is affecting me or the issue is from me. I've tried to bring up the issue so we talk about it but it's always ends with 'I don't like talking about sex'. I brought up the idea of her going online to read up somethings about it so we know how to help each other, its still to no avail. During the lock down, we were home together for 5 months plus, there was nothing like sex.
I've not taken all these too serious because we aren't officially married yet and also I feel I might bring back her past, but I don't want all these to affect the both of us when we finally get married.
She's a decent, hard working, helping, and a supportive lady. In fact she worked my way out of Nigeria with her and we have been staying together since then.

My people, please what do I do. How do I tackle this because we are working towards our wedding already.
She doesn't cheat likewise myself.

Bro, Let her see a good counsellor for counselling. It is a psychological issue. Don't dump her. Give her all support she needs to overcome the challenges.
Pls note this: I do not encourage sex before marriage.
Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by DaInferno(m): 11:27am On Dec 12, 2020
I hardly find myself Commenting on sex issues. But the issue is not to be shyed away as people make it seem. Some say sex isn't everything in a relationship, so does that mean we leave our hustle, our families and even some friends just to cling to someone for the rest of our lives without sex involved? Just co-habitation and family responsibilities?

I don't know what someone who doesn't like food is looking for in the kitchen o, I can't marry a woman who isn't ready to have sex because of a past experience. They say there's time for everything, and time heals all as well. So why would you marry someone who isn't ready to let go the past and enjoy sex properly? In this life that we came to live once fa!

Your WIFE TO BE had better start seeing you as a someone she'd start opening up to else it continues down the marriage.

If she can't talk about her sex life, I wonder why u can't tell her you also can't continue with the relationship again. Always think long term.

Life expectancy of the average Nigerian is not upto 50 again,so ...


Let's learn to take actions that we can accommodate it's consequences.

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by Soljaboi44(m): 11:28am On Dec 12, 2020
Run oh angry
Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by paulsibility(m): 11:43am On Dec 12, 2020
"repent for the kingdom of God is at hand".

Isn't that what you have on your bio ?

Or is pre-marital sex not captured in your repentance plan?

1 Like

Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by Nobody: 12:01pm On Dec 12, 2020
Question is, do you see yourself abstaining from sex for years even while married ? If no, then you know what to do.

Its better you break your engagement to her than to have a divorce because of sexual issues.

Sex isn't the only thing in marriage but its necessary. Very very. She is being selfish by punishing you for something you know nothing about. Let her work on herself and accept that sex is marriage is important, if not, let her be.

If it is an issue now, it will be a huge problem once marriage enter.

3 Likes 1 Share

Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by muller101(m): 12:09pm On Dec 12, 2020
CalliDora1:



Shhhhhhh...

Go back to bed. It's too early.
One just surfaced.
Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by mattsvibes: 12:16pm On Dec 12, 2020
S
E
X bro u need to do the needful what's the essence of the financial assistance and not getting bleeped it just a waist of time if you love her you have to turn the game around before your marriage or else you have to cope with it for the rest of ur life....
Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by JERRY1925(m): 12:34pm On Dec 12, 2020
Kenog4real:
Hi NLders
Please mind my grammars. I have a lot to write but I'm just gonna go straight to the point.
My girlfriend/wife to be happens to be a rape victim. Thou we've been dating for almost 3years and by God's grace, we are working towards our wedding. The thing there is that there are issues with our sex lives. Due to her past experience, it's most times hard to have pleasing, fun and great sex. I met her to be someone not into sex because she told me she uses hot water to calm herself whenever she's in the mood; although she has a way to do things and we both climax almost together without penetration. Her reason for not giving in to sex is that there is always a flashback when it happens. As a man, you know getting inside the V and doing it as one like is the koko. By the time we started the main thing (sex)after months, I found out I don't last again and at the same time I don't satisfy her. Whenever we wanna do anything, the only pre-intimacy allowed most time is from the neck to the tummy region. Every other place is a no go/touch area(her excuse is that she get irritated and also scared of infection) except I wanna get in and also there is this facial expression from her that always makes me feel guilty and at the same loose focus which sometimes turns me off or makes me nut on time when things gets serious. I've always felt maybe it's the tightness, what we've both been doing before we started having normal sex that is affecting me or the issue is from me. I've tried to bring up the issue so we talk about it but it's always ends with 'I don't like talking about sex'. I brought up the idea of her going online to read up somethings about it so we know how to help each other, its still to no avail. During the lock down, we were home together for 5 months plus, there was nothing like sex.
I've not taken all these too serious because we aren't officially married yet and also I feel I might bring back her past, but I don't want all these to affect the both of us when we finally get married.
She's a decent, hard working, helping, and a supportive lady. In fact she worked my way out of Nigeria with her and we have been staying together since then.

My people, please what do I do. How do I tackle this because we are working towards our wedding already.
She doesn't cheat likewise myself.

Fact Is her brain no longer on default setting.
Thats because you have probably pampered her for too long.
Now is the time to be a man, if not u will regret all through your marriage.
I guess u scared of losing her... Reason u pamper her so much.
Bros u have nothing to lose when it's a woman. Las Las you the one spending more of your resources. You have to be strict with her.
Don't make it about sex.
Make it about the bolded.
If you cannot talk to your woman.. Never marry her.
If your girlfriend cannot listen to you before marriage.. After marriage would be worst.
If u can't really enjoy sex with her now... Guy after marriage, it will b like hell mostly if u not cool with cheating.
Chairman do the needful.. Bring her brain back to default settings.
And you can only get that by proving to her u the man. If she fails to listen to you, let her go.
Don't worry she will b back.
Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by LandMann: 12:44pm On Dec 12, 2020
CalliDora1:
Is it food?

I don't know what is wrong with this generation and sex. Mtcheeewww

Now... There are so many things responsible for her lack of interest in penetration.

Firstly.. she's scared of infection (according to you) and that alone can make a lady refuse penetration until she's sure about her partner.

Secondly: you said she can climax by doing things to herself. Hmmm.. this alone can make a woman lose interest in the actual thing especially if she can no longer achieve climax with sex. She'll rather go with the former.

Lastly, you guys are not yet married and that could be the reason she's not willing to give her all for fear of being dumped afterwards. I don't want to believe the rape experience is the major reason for refusing you sex if not, she won't even get down with you at all for pre-intimacy. With marriage she'll loosen up. Trust me!

Yeah.. I forgot to add that he should discourage her from self service and make her see reasons why. I believe She'll adjust.

A lawyer friend disclosed this to me a long time ago.

If the previous generation didn't like sex, you'll still be in the nut sack of a 50-85 year old man.

2 Likes

Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by Nobody: 12:54pm On Dec 12, 2020
LandMann:


If the previous generation didn't like sex, you'll still be in the nut sack of a 50-85 year old man.

Your own is too much! Of all she's done for him, sex is what is going to make him leave her?.. you men don't know what you want.

You like the type that is already wild and will be giving it to you every now and then. Tommorow, when she gets out of control and start going outside, you'll come and create another post.

It's those type that will give you another mans child to train that fit you men.

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