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Should I Go Ahead And Marry Her With This Her Mindset? by Anoymus: 11:49am On Dec 16, 2020 |
I have a girlfriend I am meaning to propose to during the festive period, she's everything I want in a woman except few exception which might be a hindrance to the proposal. Gist is, my babe is a graduate but lack of work made her to learn fashion designing, she's done with the training and she's very good with what she does. After marriage, I have told her that I'll assist in her business, I'm planning to get a bigger shop space for her and equip it with modern day machines, tools and tailoring materials goods to help make her work lucrative. I'm budgeting about 1.2-1.5m for this. The issue now is that, 3 days ago, I asked her what her role would be if eventually after marriage she gets the shop, equipments and all, where she would come in in terms of responsibilities in the house. Her reply was she doesn't want to assume any responsibility and that it's my duty to cater for the family and she can only help & I shouldn't make anything compulsory for her. So many thoughts came through my mind. One of it was that, where the proceeds of her investment would be going to if I should shoulder all the responsibilities in the house knowing fully well that she makes money. I rang my mum and told her of her response, I was shocked that she backed her saying that I shouldn't have asked her to foot anything in the house that it was my sole responsibility as a man to cater for my family my wife inclusive. My dad too, same thing. Even told my gf mum about it too , she giggled and said I shouldn't have asked her n that it's my duty to provide for my family. They all sounded foreign to me. Or am I the one not understanding? My question now is, why invest that kind of money in her when I'm not sure of getting little or nothing in terms in return help to run the family. That sum of money could get me 4 brand new bikes and 2 neatly used Keke Napep for transportation business. I'm sure I'll be getting returns from these investment weekly or monthly basis. I don't want who wouldn't have any sense of responsibility at home after investing in her, even if she's covering 10% or 5% I wouldn't mind. Mere helping doesn't go down well with me, she might have and decide not to give out. I rather not invest at all and expect nothing from her. I don't know if I'm the one over thinking this things or my parent and her mum aren't seeing things from my perspective or am I being inconsiderate? Criticism, Insults and bashing are welcomed. Thanks 223 Likes 13 Shares |
Re: Should I Go Ahead And Marry Her With This Her Mindset? by Martini101(m): 11:58am On Dec 16, 2020 |
As far as you don’t encounter a prolonged hard time during the course of the marriage to her, this one shouldn’t be an issue if the earlier mentioned qualities are maintained and improved on. NB: Don’t expect to meet a perfect person. 68 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: Should I Go Ahead And Marry Her With This Her Mindset? by stacyadams: 12:11pm On Dec 16, 2020 |
Anoymus: Ur thinking in the right direction bro, others RE not seeing it.. 382 Likes 22 Shares |
Re: Should I Go Ahead And Marry Her With This Her Mindset? by AFvckingAlpha(m): 12:13pm On Dec 16, 2020 |
The fvck Niggarr!! Wahala for who go marry o! Your sixth-sense is obviously telling you the right thing to do. My niggarr, I wouldn't tell you what not to do. The entrepeneur in you is kicking in, I hope you trust your sixth-sense. I said what I said 357 Likes 14 Shares |
Re: Should I Go Ahead And Marry Her With This Her Mindset? by lanre9ja(m): 12:18pm On Dec 16, 2020 |
She's right, u are the man, she can only help when it necessary 48 Likes 9 Shares |
Re: Should I Go Ahead And Marry Her With This Her Mindset? by Nazgul: 12:19pm On Dec 16, 2020 |
She's a very selfish person. I hate girls that reason that way. How can you look at a guy who invested 1.5m on you, married you, housed you, feeds you and tell him that you won't contribute to the home? She has clearly told you that you stand to benefit nothing from her if you go ahead with the marriage plans. Whatever action you decide to take is up to you. 586 Likes 30 Shares |
Re: Should I Go Ahead And Marry Her With This Her Mindset? by Shortyy(f): 12:21pm On Dec 16, 2020 |
This is why advice everyone fend for themselves. To avoid, after all I've done for you. Or what will you give me in return. 54 Likes 5 Shares |
Re: Should I Go Ahead And Marry Her With This Her Mindset? by Brian47(m): 12:28pm On Dec 16, 2020 |
Break up.
God don expose her 112 Likes 4 Shares |
Re: Should I Go Ahead And Marry Her With This Her Mindset? by Dliquidmetal(m): 12:30pm On Dec 16, 2020 |
I dont know about others o but even if I'm a billionaire tomorrow and I decide to get married,I would still wont like it if my wife dosent contribute anything into the union cause its gonna be one side and that mean say the babe no even really love me b4. I would advice you to sit her down and make her reason from your perspective the world has advanced pass those level wey na only man go dey stress himself even economy tough. Marriage is a lifetime something and what you know isnt okay with you now about your partner wouldn't change once you marry(which is a bondage to me anyway) 238 Likes 7 Shares |
Re: Should I Go Ahead And Marry Her With This Her Mindset? by Bola146(f): 12:33pm On Dec 16, 2020 |
![]() 314 Likes 15 Shares |
Re: Should I Go Ahead And Marry Her With This Her Mindset? by Nobody: 12:35pm On Dec 16, 2020 |
man she will probably left u when she is financially secured 151 Likes 5 Shares |
Re: Should I Go Ahead And Marry Her With This Her Mindset? by Anoymus: 12:38pm On Dec 16, 2020 |
aminu114:wow! 17 Likes |
Re: Should I Go Ahead And Marry Her With This Her Mindset? by Anoymus: 12:39pm On Dec 16, 2020 |
Bola146:My thoughts exactly. Thank you for your input ma'am. 53 Likes |
Re: Should I Go Ahead And Marry Her With This Her Mindset? by NiRfreak(m): 12:49pm On Dec 16, 2020 |
Anoymus: Don't invest on her yet. Use the money to invest in yourself or your own personal business since you are going to bear the financial responsibility of the family. Use your head. Don't bring stress early in your marriage into ya life. It seems she will respect you more when u have all the money and cater for the family exclusively . Create a business in ya own name and run it...so when u have enough money u can give away without feeling pained of the consequences, u may now give her to invest in herself. Thats even in the name of love 400 Likes 16 Shares |
Re: Should I Go Ahead And Marry Her With This Her Mindset? by Liposure: 12:59pm On Dec 16, 2020 |
This mentality of leaving every load with the man is obsolete and has to stop. This is the 21st century for god's sake 154 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: Should I Go Ahead And Marry Her With This Her Mindset? by dannex4adx(m): 1:03pm On Dec 16, 2020 |
Anoymus: Bro! this issue has been causing fight between some of the couples I know. my advice is that, you need to think deeply about it, have a heart to heart conversation with her, don't let your family and hers to decide or think for you. 37 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Should I Go Ahead And Marry Her With This Her Mindset? by Snaagg(m): 1:04pm On Dec 16, 2020 |
Are you destined to be unfortunate? what's the point of marrying her? what do you stand to gain? If your duty is to provide and feed her and her poverty-stricken family members, what is her own duty to you? 173 Likes 4 Shares |
Re: Should I Go Ahead And Marry Her With This Her Mindset? by Nobody: 1:05pm On Dec 16, 2020 |
Anoymus:I support her fully, it's a big turn off for a man to be asking hid wife to be such question,assist her if you can from your heart and I believe she's wise enough to know where and when to assist you as per responsibilities. I hate guys who throw such question,i have ignored a guy for this reason and till today he's still wondering what he did to me, don't give me the impression that your eyes are fixed on my money, its a big turn off 41 Likes 6 Shares |
Re: Should I Go Ahead And Marry Her With This Her Mindset? by Nobody: 1:07pm On Dec 16, 2020 |
Snaagg:Is he marrying her for gains, why are you men becoming leeches smh 14 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Should I Go Ahead And Marry Her With This Her Mindset? by Snaagg(m): 1:08pm On Dec 16, 2020 |
Zzor: who gives a fukk about what turns you off? parasite. you want a man to give you what your father has never given your mother nor done for you 368 Likes 12 Shares |
Re: Should I Go Ahead And Marry Her With This Her Mindset? by Lordseyad(m): 1:08pm On Dec 16, 2020 |
Zzor: But your eyes are fixed on his own money ![]() ![]() 287 Likes 6 Shares |
Re: Should I Go Ahead And Marry Her With This Her Mindset? by davien(m): 1:28pm On Dec 16, 2020 |
Dangote, Dangote, Dangote, still dey find money oh. op dey, op dey, op dey, build shop for woman oh. Who go lose? Who go lose? Who go lose when she no fit run am? I no dey beg anybody oh, make you check am yourself see oh. Get sense oh, get sense oh, man wey invest in himself no dey miss road oh.. this woman no view you as man to help him life oh, na you be plan B be that. 58 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Should I Go Ahead And Marry Her With This Her Mindset? by SweetCunt97(f): 1:33pm On Dec 16, 2020 |
Anoymus:Atleast she did not pretend. Best you remove eye from woman money sha or go marry oyibo 8 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: Should I Go Ahead And Marry Her With This Her Mindset? by mathong: 1:34pm On Dec 16, 2020 |
Woman will always assist the family but she won't promise you so you don't relent in working hard! No perfect woman out there, but they're always Noble! 43 Likes 4 Shares |
Re: Should I Go Ahead And Marry Her With This Her Mindset? by Kobicove(m): 2:03pm On Dec 16, 2020 |
Anoymus: Since you're calling everyone to ask for their opinion on a husband and wig matter I'm also waiting to receive a call from you ![]() 5 Likes |
Re: Should I Go Ahead And Marry Her With This Her Mindset? by NobleDeSage001: 2:27pm On Dec 16, 2020 |
If you have that kind of money, I suggest that you invest it in the bike and Keke business. Enjoy the proceeds thereof. Meanwhile, you can discuss your concern with your girlfriend and spell things out clearly to avoid had I known. If you expect her to contribute towards running the family, tell her now. Do not pretend about it ooo! You can support her tailoring business from the proceeds of your bike business. Invest smartly. 37 Likes |
Re: Should I Go Ahead And Marry Her With This Her Mindset? by GIANTPLUSHUB: 2:35pm On Dec 16, 2020 |
This is parts of the reasons the rich will continue to marry the rich while the poor does the same. Your wife behaves like someone who hasn't worked hard for money before, so she doesn't have the mentality that someone that supported her business with his hard earned money needs to be supported too. Bro, trust me, she's said exactly what she would do and that's what will happen. Infact, it might even be worst. Have seen several of such cases to the extent of ordinary pencil, the lady will ask her daughter to wait for her dad. See, here's my advice for you. Please, support her business but drastically reduce the support amount to like 300 to 500k and use the remaining to invest in yourself as you can see that, you now have a load of task ahead of you. Once you support the business, guide her in upgrading to a larger space and more machines just the way you want. This, you aren't doing with your money but her money. Only advice and guide her. Lastly, as times goes on. Bring in tactics towards her supporting the family. I wish you all the very best! 132 Likes 4 Shares |
Re: Should I Go Ahead And Marry Her With This Her Mindset? by 21cents: 2:42pm On Dec 16, 2020 |
aminu114:lol. walahi. OP shine your eyes and know this- that woman doesn't love you one bit. she a gold digger seeking financial security and won't think twice to dump you when she have financial security in the tune of >5-7million from you. Love is sacrifice from both sides, and when she can't fulfill her own part of those sacrifices, the love is therefore termed "parasitic" where one party just wants to leech on the the other while screaming "you're the man". except she gave you her virginity, which is amongst the core values of a righteous and virtuous bride/spouse, she's only with you due to what you offer and care less about bringing nothing to the table to run a family. my advise- dont uplift her financially, let her sort herself out and come to terms that the home's responsibilities is 100% yours. if she can't make sacrifices (Virginity/purity, or financial contribution) then that's a parasite right there. 70 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Should I Go Ahead And Marry Her With This Her Mindset? by Geniemoi01(m): 2:45pm On Dec 16, 2020 |
If you are foolish enough to end up marrying her, you'll hate yourself ×100! Ignore what your parents are telling you. They are very traditional. But your wife isn't traditional. Most girls only want to take and take without giving anything back. Without contributing. All of the money will be used for herself and her family! In the event that you fall sick or lose your job or have a financial setback, she won't wanna lift a finger and even if she does she'll make you hate yourself. Or in a worse case scenario she's gonna leave you when she feels she's now equal to you or financially better than you. You better be wise!!! You better be wise !!! You better be wise!!! Im talking to you from practical experience! Don't say you weren't warned! 110 Likes 3 Shares |
Re: Should I Go Ahead And Marry Her With This Her Mindset? by JohnDazzy: 2:53pm On Dec 16, 2020 |
You shouldn't have asked her that way though It makes it look as though you're giving her that money so she could work for you If you want it to be a family business, fine, come out plainly with a plan, e.g. let her run the technicals (since she skilled at it), you run the cash flow and other logistics Lobatan 26 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: Should I Go Ahead And Marry Her With This Her Mindset? by Franktom247(m): 2:55pm On Dec 16, 2020 |
1.4million will buy 4 keke napep e be like say na goodluck jonathan be your president enter market make you price as for you and your babe matter i cannot help you because mordern day marriage or relationship na scam 24 Likes |
Re: Should I Go Ahead And Marry Her With This Her Mindset? by olabosipo66559: 3:01pm On Dec 16, 2020 |
This mentality of leaving every load with the man is obsolete and therefore should be done away with 27 Likes |
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