Marriage isn't a do or die affair for people who claim to love each other.
Rather than deceive or trick someone into holy matrimony with a hidden intention of sleeping around,giving him another man's child and making it look like he's responsible.
Why don't you just quit at the first instance
Why not tell him you got pregnant out of wedlock?

If he truly loves you, he won't prosecute you for saying the truth.

Marriage is meant to be a bond between two people,not a community service.


That men started this ugly behavior doesn't mean we ladies should take it to the extreme.


Honestly,if your husband brings another man's child for you to train while you both are married. Divorce him(he isn't faithful at all). Trust me,he's most likely doing more cheating on you.

But,if he brings in a child for you to train cause,he got the child before you guys met. Pardon him(you were just another random girl in the street who caught his heart)


Here are some of the dangers associated with paternity fraud;;;;;;;;;;;;;;

1) Heartbreak--- No doubt this is the very first disadvantage of lying to someone about his biological children.
All those years they've spent together as father and child. All the sweet memories gone in just 2mins.

It drives him into a deep state of irredeemable thoughts.
*this child who calls me daddy isn't mine* ?

He starts looking at them from a very different and strange angle.

During this process,trust me, he is totally drifting away from his human form.



2) Shock and psychological trauma--- Certainly, you know you won't feel alright the day another woman walks up to you and demand you give her,her child.
I mean,the thousand in one thoughts running through your mind would fill up the entire earth.

You'll most likely start with fever then fall into coma or develop chronic HBP(high blood pressure).

This is the same thing that happens to a man when you take away the little lovers in his life and bestows them on another man.


3) Division--- Your household,in-laws, children and happiness will be divided and cut short.
The hatred your kids will develop for each other when they eventually find out they're not related, should even change your mind about committing that act.

How about your family members who won't only see you as a failure of a daughter. A disgrace to womanhood and a total bad tape to the marriage world.


4) Suicide--- So many people have fragile hearts. Men act tough but,they're NOT tough when it comes to love.
He might not cry but,he is broken hearted.

Suicide is a thought that creeps in when you think the whole world is against you. When you feel no one cares about you,when you don't feel loved by any.
When you think everything have been taken away from you.

In this case,you've taken away this man's life even before it began.
He thought he would see his grandkids but,he's seeing his grave.

Then he thinks,why not just jump into it and end all this hatred against me.

5) Sudden DEATH--- Just like in the movies. Everyone dies but,only one will survive. Guess who/what that is??


Your story.
The story of a woman who betrayed her husband. The story of a woman who shared her body to every man outside her matrimonial home.
That would be your story.

You killed yourself.
You killed your husband.
You killed your kids.





But StacyO,

HOW DO I LET HIM KNOW THE CHILD DOESN'T BELONG TO HIM??

You now realize your mistakes,right?
The best method to use when you plan to break such an abominable news to someone is to use the connection you both have.

And that connection is the child.

Open up the news to the child first and make it a deep secret. Get the child into talking to his/her or their daddy.

Starting with how much they love him and how any decision he makes won't affect their love for him.
They should even advice him to divorce you so as to have peace of mind.

Discussions should be centered majorly on their unconditional love for him.

You as the perpetrator can exit the house for some time so as to give the man time to think.


I'm open to corrections or arguments on this.




MEN----Try to understand that DNA test is very important in a marriage where trust is not found.
Paternity fraud is not a death sentence.

As a matter of fact,it is your key to freedom from an evil partner.

Cause trust me, whoever has the audacity to sleep and birth a child while married,can kill her husband and bring in her second lover.

Be strong and move on. There is still time to birth a new bouncing love.


NB: Nairaland women bashers,this is not to support you in anyway oooo.
You are on your own.
I'm just saying my mind cause,this new trend is really pissing me off.



Ladies,what are your takes on paternity fraud?




Anyway,

LOOK BEFORE YOU LEAP INTO MARRIAGE.

I couldn't read all, sorry. Nice write up anyway

@Stacyo tryna impress someone?

I totally agree with you, paternity fraud is evil, and should be frowned upon. In marriages where trust no longer exists, the man can run a DNA test to assertain the geninueness of his kids and must be prepared for the worse should the results revoke his status as father.

But one of the problems why this paternity fraud exists because of stigma of not being married here in Africa and Nigeria as a woman. This is what drives desperate women into jumping on any committed man they see.

In most cases they don't really love the man and might even have one or more lovers who they maintain constant unprotected sex with thereby increasing the possibility of paternity fraud.

But since the prospective husband is the only one showing reasonable commitment towards her, she'll give in to marriage to remove the shame of being unmarried then continue her promiscuous lifestyle.

The only cure for this is for every man to enter relationships with his eyes fully open, so they can easily detect when the woman is playing them and when her love is geninue.

Also, parents too have a very big role to play by encouraging their children to keep their virginity till marriage. Marrying as a virgin will definitely eliminate any kind of unnecessary suspicion in your home.

Men still very much do It! Just that they are very good at hiding it.

Married men have side chics with babies scattered everywhere. Visiting them from time to time and giving them whatever they want.

Forget all these cries they've been crying all over here lately.

In as much I'm not in support of a woman being promiscuous, I'll not take any emotional blackmail from any man. They do that quite well. Always acting like the saints, and painting women black, while they're the masters lol.

Trust me, some men always think they're manipulative and they can get their way through any woman, till they meet a pro at the game, then lamentation starts.

Shortyy:
Men still very much do It! Just that they are very good at hiding it.

Married men have side chics with babies scattered everywhere. Visiting them from time to time and giving them whatever they want.

Forget all these cries they've been crying all over here lately.

In as much I'm not in support of a woman being promiscuous, I'll not take any emotional blackmail from any man. They do that quite well. Always acting like the saints, and painting women black, while they're the masters lol.

Trust me, some men always think they're manipulative and they can get their way through any woman, till they meet a pro at the game, then lamentation starts.

4 Ur Mind...

Shortyy:
Men still very much do It! Just that they are very good at hiding it.

Married men have side chics with babies scattered everywhere. Visiting them from time to time and giving them whatever they want.

Forget all these cries they've been crying all over here lately.

In as much I'm not in support of a woman being promiscuous, I'll not take any emotional blackmail from any man. They do that quite well. Always acting like the saints, and painting women black, while they're the masters lol.

Trust me, some men always think they're manipulative and they can get their way through any woman, till they meet a pro at the game, then lamentation starts.

You are a pro in your dad's house bah? Get out there on your own and know what time really says! Small kids these days not as smart as their mothers.

Tloc:


You are a pro in your dad's house bah? Get out there on your own and know what time really says! Small kids these days not as smart as their mothers.

This is the only weapon used against women.
"Clock is ticking" sorry, it doesn't work on me, let it tick!

Shortyy:
Men still very much do It! Just that they are very good at hiding it.

Married men have side chics with babies scattered everywhere. Visiting them from time to time and giving them whatever they want.

Forget all these cries they've been crying all over here lately.

In as much I'm not in support of a woman being promiscuous, I'll not take any emotional blackmail from any man. They do that quite well. Always acting like the saints, and painting women black, while they're the masters lol.

Trust me, some men always think they're manipulative and they can get their way through any woman, till they meet a pro at the game, then lamentation starts.

Heart attack pillers everywhere.

Bae,this was a tough blow.

Why I said men are soft hearted when it comes to the matters of the heart(love).

Men still very much indulge in it.
Shame.

Shortyy:
Men still very much do It! Just that they are very good at hiding it.

Married men have side chics with babies scattered everywhere. Visiting them from time to time and giving them whatever they want.

Forget all these cries they've been crying all over here lately.

In as much I'm not in support of a woman being promiscuous, I'll not take any emotional blackmail from any man. They do that quite well. Always acting like the saints, and painting women black, while they're the masters lol.

Trust me, some men always think they're manipulative and they can get their way through any woman, till they meet a pro at the game, then lamentation starts.

A man having a child outside of wedlock is different from a woman who tricks her husband to father a child that is not his. The latter is worse.

Men sacrifice a lot to raise up a child (same with women) One day the man will wake up and discover that the child/children he gave everything is actually another man's child/children. If I find myself in such position, I will personally behead the woman and proudly face the consequence of my actions.

PUNAengineOIL:
A man having a child outside of wedlock is different from a woman who tricks her husband to father a child that is not his. The latter is worse.

Men sacrifice a lot to raise up a child (same with women) One day the man will wake up and discover that the child/children he gave everything is actually another man's child/children. If I find myself in such position, I will personally behead the woman and proudly face the consequences of my actions.

That won't solve the issue at hand.

Filing a divorce will be much better. To be candid


Life is too short to end someone else's.

PUNAengineOIL:
A man having a child outside of wedlock is different from a woman who tricks her husband to father a child that is not his. The latter is worse.

Men sacrifice a lot to raise up a child (same with women) One day the man will wake up and discover that the child/children he gave everything is actually another man's child/children. If I find myself in such position, I will personally behead the woman and proudly face the consequence of my actions.

There is no difference there Mr man! Just that the woman has no way of hiding hers, while the man does!

StacyO:


Heart attack pillers everywhere.

Bae,this was a tough blow.

Why I said men are soft hearted when it comes to the matters of the heart(love).

Men still very much indulge in it.
Shame.

I'm telling you, sis, forget this their crying. They hate being played lmao. They'd prefer to be the players and the manipulators.

Once you pinch them small, they'd start weeping allover. Bunch of emotional pricks.

StacyO:


That won't solve the issue at hand.

Filing a divorce will be much better. To be candid


Life is too short to end someone else's.

You will not understand because you are a woman. I recently read an article of a man who had 3 children but later discovered that the 3 children belonged to another man. The life of such man is ruined forever, by the wife. You expect such man to file for divorce?

Paternity fraud is a very evil act

Shortyy:


There is no difference there Mr man! Just that the woman has no way of hiding hers, while the man does!

yes agree to faulting both party , men hv other children outside with out telling the woman , anothe betrayal we hardly talk about

Nazgul:
I totally agree with you, paternity fraud is evil, and should be frowned upon. In marriages where trust no longer exists, the man can run a DNA test to assertain the geninueness of his kids and must be prepared for the worse should the results revoke his status as father.

But one of the problems why this paternity fraud exists because of stigma of not being married here in Africa and Nigeria as a woman. This is what drives desperate women into jumping on any committed man they see.

In most cases they don't really love the man and might even have one or more lovers who they maintain constant unprotected sex with thereby increasing the possibility of paternity fraud.

But since the prospective husband is the only one showing reasonable commitment towards her, she'll give in to marriage to remove the shame of being unmarried then continue her promiscuous lifestyle.

The only cure for this is for every man to enter relationships with his eyes fully open, so they can easily detect when the woman is playing them and when her love is geninue.

Also, parents too have a very big role to play by encouraging their children to keep their virginity till marriage. Marrying as a virgin will definitely eliminate any kind of unnecessary suspicion in your home.

Entering into the marriage as a virgin won't guarantee she remains faithful though.
But,any woman who gets married as a virgin, will have every higher chances of being faithful to her husband all through their marriage.

I strongly believe as this applies to females,it should most likely apply to males.

A lot of bias attitudes from the male end.

Liliantalks:
yes agree to faulting both party , men hv other children outside with out telling the woman , anothe betrayal we hardly talk about

It's like a norm this days for men.

Cheating is now a part of being a man.

I think that should equally be looked into.

..,,,

StacyO:

Entering into the marriage as a virgin won't guarantee she remains faithful though.
But,any woman who gets married as a virgin, will have every higher chances of being faithful to her husband all through their marriage.

I strongly believe as this applies to females,it should most likely apply to males.

A lot of bias attitudes from the male end.

I wasn't bias with my submission. I said virgins (meaning males inclusive) not female virgins only. Males are the ones who disvirgin the females so if male children are properly trained on how to control their sexual urges, there would be no one to defile the female virgins.

And like you stated, although being a virgin doesn't guarantee that you'll have a successful marriage, the chances of having to endure the pain of a cheating partner would almost be non-existent thereby eliminating paternity fraud.

Shortyy:


This is the only weapon used against women.
"Clock is ticking" sorry, it doesn't work on me, let it tick!

Time have not reached

Paternity fraud is a very evil act

Wunna:
@Stacyo tryna impress someone?

How please??

You will not understand because you are a woman. I recently read an article of a man who had 3 children but later discovered that the 3 children belonged to another man. The life of such man is ruined forever, by the wife. You expect such man to file for divorce?

How do you define a man's life being ruined??


A lot of people go through worse.

He's still alive and breathing,that's even a cause for celebration.
How about if the woman killed him during the process of concealing the truth??

Wunna:
@Stacyo tryna impress someone?

Yes, ireti..

Shortyy:


This is the only weapon used against women.
"Clock is ticking" sorry, it doesn't work on me, let it tick!

Don't worry. Be getting ready to become the cover picture of Shiloh's 2035 magazine. Shey almost every important news crosses nairaland. Till then

StacyO:


How do you define a man's life being ruined??


A lot of people go through worse.

He's still alive and breathing,that's even a cause for celebration.
How about if the woman killed him during the process of concealing the truth??

Just take a look at the Nonsense you typed.
"He's still alive and breathing, that's even a cause for celebration." You think it's easy knowing as a man you've been taking care and calling bastards your own children. You think it's easy later finding out you've been living with a highly deceptive partner akin to the devil for how many years. All your love, time, investments, hopes and aspirations for your supposed 'kids' just go down the drain in one day. Few men would still accept the children but trust me the love towards them would surely wax cold. I'm not saying we men are better off. But I'm talking from my male perspective and I've seen few instances of these paternity fraud cases and trust me it was very ugly. You women would even do worse if it was the other way round, I'm very sure of that.

Shortyy:
Men still very much do It! Just that they are very good at hiding it.

Married men have side chics with babies scattered everywhere. Visiting them from time to time and giving them whatever they want.

Forget all these cries they've been crying all over here lately.

In as much I'm not in support of a woman being promiscuous, I'll not take any emotional blackmail from any man. They do that quite well. Always acting like the saints, and painting women black, while they're the masters lol.

Trust me, some men always think they're manipulative and they can get their way through any woman, till they meet a pro at the game, then lamentation starts.

Until you learn that by nature;


Men are polygamous
Women are hypergamous

Then you can understand what it means for a man not to cheat , and for a woman not to cheat by keeping her Hypergamy in check

Men cheat because u ladies refuse to understand or acknowledge our nature of polygamy
Women cheat because they have to meet up with their Hypergamy


The solution LOVE from both parties these alone will destroy that polygamous instinct

Women should be submissive these alone keeps her Hypergamy in check

StacyO:


Heart attack pillers everywhere.

Bae,this was a tough blow.

Why I said men are soft hearted when it comes to the matters of the heart(love).

Men still very much indulge in it.
Shame.

These why men need to swallow the bitter REDPILL when they are still young

Seems you support paternity fraud. The fact that women have no way of hiding it means by nature they are not supposed to be sleeping with various men and mixing paternity. You end up damaging the kids when they find out.

But don't worry, very soon China will make a portable device cheaper than mobile phone that will be able to perform paternity or DNA test. Paternity fraud is in its last days!

Shortyy:


I'm telling you, sis, forget this their crying. They hate being played lmao. They'd prefer to be the players and the manipulators.

Once you pinch them small, they'd start weeping allover. Bunch of emotional pricks.