jedisco:


Lol...
Count how many times you used the word submit... Lol. Even a pet in the West is not submissive (hello animal rights). The best version of submission you'd get is from your Nigerian lady.. Carry this mentality near a white girl nd she'd turn you inside out.

Also let me remind you that the Bible said men should love their wives as Christ loved the church.... The kind of love that can make you die for her.

The bible also says that we should mske sure our own obedience is complete before looking at another's.

Putting both together as a man biblically, if you've not been able to love your wife to a stage where you can die for her (as commanded), then you should not be demanding submission from her. Makes sense?

Your points so far on this thread is quite intelligent and unbiased,

JovialJune:



Your points so far on this thread is quite intelligent and unbiased,

Are you married? I have someone for you, that is if you are truly a male....

The bible is full of Jewish culture. The last time I checked, I'm not Jewish. Imagine African people trying to manipulate jewish culture, western culture and our own local african culture in one marriage. That is where the problem starts from. The man still remains the head of the home. That a woman makes more money shouldn't change that. The reason why there are so many problems in black america was because the govt put the men in jail and women turned into the head of the home hence many disfunctional families. Even in white america, the man is the head of the home. That is what patriarchy is all about.

Frustrated007:
Isaiah 4:1
and in that day, seven women shall take hold of one man saying, we will eat our own bread and wear our own apparel, only let us be called by your name to take away our reproach.



A huge chunk of you ladies will enter menopause without seeing a man to marry..make una go mark am.
There's no word of God that will go unfulfilled

you type and sound your username. may i know why ?

jedisco:


Lol...
Count how many times you used the word submit... Lol. Even a pet in the West is not submissive (hello animal rights). The best version of submission you'd get is from your Nigerian lady.. Carry this mentality near a white girl nd she'd turn you inside out.

Also let me remind you that the Bible said men should love their wives as Christ loved the church.... The kind of love that can make you die for her.

The bible also says that we should mske sure our own obedience is complete before looking at another's.

Putting both together as a man biblically, if you've not been able to love your wife to a stage where you can die for her (as commanded), then you should not be demanding submission from her. Makes sense?

dont know if you are a guy or a lady but i like your post 1000% i tell a lot of guys i come across ,with the submission and control mentality no adult likes to be controlled but it seems had for it to sink in.some nigerian men run their homes like gadaffi of libya.honestly e be things

.

angelfallz:


There is nothing to fear from some women. This fear women brigade is just senseless.

Pray not to have a promiscuous woman as a wife that's all I can say.

Joseph08:


Pray not to have a promiscuous woman as a wife that's all I can say.

Lol. why would i have a promiscuous woman as a wife?
Also, lets say my wife is promiscuous and i find out, do you think i would go around shouting fear women? No. she leaves my house immediately let her go and find a new husband.

Now there are men out there that cheat on their wives, i haven't heard you say "fear men", why?

sunnybobonwa:


https://www.google.com/amp/s/thenationonlineng.net/nigerian-doctor-shoots-self-wife-in-murder-suicide-in-us/amp/


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DHFAxXSBtfc

May their soul rest in peace. Ben Okigbo was not a US-based medical doctor. He was an ICU nurse at Harris Health Ben Taub Hospital Houston Texas. Everyone is a suspect at this point including the sons (unfortunately) until it is established that they had no hand in the grisly incident.

sunnybobonwa:


https://www.google.com/amp/s/thenationonlineng.net/nigerian-doctor-shoots-self-wife-in-murder-suicide-in-us/amp/


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DHFAxXSBtfc

The African in US



Hold unto it

jajeri3216:


Just wanted to show you the consequences of these feminist movement.

The kids of these single mothers are running rampant in the west, from uk to Ireland, i even read that following black Americans, Africans are the most incarcerated of lately.

Why? Single mothers raising bad kids

Your view's are balanced but you're not seeing the big picture

Open the link.

https://twitter.com/DonCarlo66/status/1341107715184222209?s=19

Feminist movement or not, the time has come when we have to accept there's been a change in cultural dogma and we try and make the best of it. Western nations passed through this phase in times past and their ladies will never accept to go back to those 'dark ages' as they'd say.

While the ills of single parenthood is well researched, blaming it on the woman alone is too simple.
Same also with the link you shared.... I'm very careful when careful when certain narratives start getting pushed in the western media. Look at almost all the comments there... It's all about limiting migration of blacks or deporting them. I've seen this over and over again. Just before Brexit or any major clampdown on immigration, the media is full with one-sided stories. After it all happens, the truth begins to filter out.


The issues with some black commuties in the West are multifactorial and sadly it's now become a positive feedback cycle that seems to get worse. But a huge part of what drove it was decades of state sponsored discrimination and deprivation against such communities and not black women as the media would have us believe. How about black men? Wouldn't they also take responsibility for the state of their communities?

Take Nigeria for example, a state that purposely habours 2 million out of school kids wandering the streets is bound to produce millions of deliquent youths in future. Now turning round to solely blame those youths im future is wrong.

JovialJune:



Your points so far on this thread is quite intelligent and unbiased,

Are you married? I have someone for you, that is if you are truly a male....

Thanks.... Of course I'm male... Do I sound 'unmanly'?
I still dey market...so I don't mind if someone prices my market

shedomains:


dont know if you are a guy or a lady but i like your post 1000% i tell a lot of guys i come across ,with the submission and control mentality no adult likes to be controlled but it seems had for it to sink in.some nigerian men run their homes like gadaffi of libya.honestly e be things

We're in changing times and the cultural dogma is inevitably changing. Of course people respond to change in different ways and there'd always be an initial resistance.
Fact is as relatively more women get equal education to their male counterparts, attain to same heights at work e.t.c... some things will change..

Very few guys would want to marry the uneducated, naive, submissive lady. They want an exposed, educated, working class and fully submissive lady.. It goes both ways. People want the best of both and we should understand the higher our targets, the more difficult they are to achieve

jedisco:


Thanks.... Of course I'm male... Do I sound 'unmanly'?
I still dey market...so I don't mind if someone prices my market

I thought I deleted that last part cos you didn't reply immediately, how come you still have it

SIRTee15:


Live in Nanny don't come cheap in western countries. They cost an average 30 dollars per hour. Besides, any form of maltreatment accusation from the nanny against her employer can ruin his life and land him in jail.
I agree with u on building needless mansion in nigeria but buying a house in a good neighbourhood is inevitable on the long run.
Neighbourhood determines everything here. Good schools, good hospitals, crime free areas are located in expensive neighbourhood....and if u want the best for your family, u will buy a house in such neighbourhood.

Trust me, U don't want to go buy house in crime infested or low income areas....having low lifes as neighbours. Its a disservice to your kids. I'm sure u dont want your son walking around the house smoking weed or your daughter humping d*ck from age 14.

U also need to save if u want your children to attend ivy league schools because they are f*cking expensive. And there's nothing wrong helping your kids have a head start in life by helping them pay for initial mortgage deposit. This way they can buy house in their early 20s n finish payment in their late 30s.
Immigrants sacrifice a lot for their kids in this country. This include working extra n long hours to achieve those goals.

You have a good understanding of how Western nations work.

For a vadt majority of immigrants who came in legally, it's their children that really get to immigrate and reap the benefits. For those who came in through illegal means, that wait may even be longer.

That's why I smile when folks mention prenup.. They read the stories of rich artist online and start thinking. How many immigrants at the point of marriage have anything tangible to put on a prenup talk more of paying a lawyer for that. The only thing may be a house still being mortgaged. Prenup or not, in the event of a divorce, that house likely goes to the person who keeps the kids, if not, the state will need to provide those kids good accommodation. No one is happy to pay taxes to house another mans kids while the man gets to keep his.

In the west, having an understanding and supportive spose who can look after the homefront nd the kids while the other hustles for more cadh has been the magic pattern that has worked for most. How many earn enough to pay a full time nanny

JovialJune:



I thought I deleted that last part cos you didn't reply immediately, how come you still have it
.

No wahala...Na market we deu... Let's hope my market will sell....
I saw the response briefly and someone quoted it.... I have the day off so going thru my mentions

jedisco:

No wahala...Na market we deu... Let's hope my market will sell....
I saw the response briefly and someone quoted it.... I have the day off so going thru my mentions

Okay then, fingers crossed

Good luck.

jedisco:


Lol...
Count how many times you used the word submit... Lol. Even a pet in the West is not submissive (hello animal rights). The best version of submission you'd get is from your Nigerian lady.. Carry this mentality near a white girl nd she'd turn you inside out.

Also let me remind you that the Bible said men should love their wives as Christ loved the church.... The kind of love that can make you die for her.

The bible also says that we should mske sure our own obedience is complete before looking at another's.

Putting both together as a man biblically, if you've not been able to love your wife to a stage where you can die for her (as commanded), then you should not be demanding submission from her. Makes sense?

LOL thats the problem right there with some of you nigerian women u never practice what you preach ...you want it all from the men without sacrificing anything ....i got news for you a lot of you will be single into old age

goody234:


LOL thats the problem right there with some of you nigerian women u never practice what you preach ...you want it all from the men without sacrificing anything ....i got news for you a lot of you will be single into old age

Is this what you resort to? I replied a post and rather than put up a coherent response to it, you start questioning my gender.

Look through my posts for over 10years I've been on this site... My dabbling into this issue was because I noticed alot were ignorant regarding what's obtainable out there. That I'm a male or female has nothing to do with my response. Your lack of critical reasoning is appalling.

Nigeria has a rapidly growing population of over 200million, most of which are poor and the only thing on your mind is the person who is single or not. Don't worry, there are millions of white ladies ready to kneel at your feet cos you've got a d***

If this is your definition of masculinity, then you are a disgrace to it.

SIRTee15:


Live in Nanny don't come cheap in western countries. They cost an average 30 dollars per hour. Besides, any form of maltreatment accusation from the nanny against her employer can ruin his life and land him in jail.
I agree with u on building needless mansion in nigeria but buying a house in a good neighbourhood is inevitable on the long run.
Neighbourhood determines everything here. Good schools, good hospitals, crime free areas are located in expensive neighbourhood....and if u want the best for your family, u will buy a house in such neighbourhood.

Trust me, U don't want to go buy house in crime infested or low income areas....having low lifes as neighbours. Its a disservice to your kids. I'm sure u dont want your son walking around the house smoking weed or your daughter humping d*ck from age 14.

U also need to save if u want your children to attend ivy league schools because they are f*cking expensive. And there's nothing wrong helping your kids have a head start in life by helping them pay for initial mortgage deposit. This way they can buy house in their early 20s n finish payment in their late 30s.
Immigrants sacrifice a lot for their kids in this country. This include working extra n long hours to achieve those goals.

WORD!

sunnybobonwa:


https://www.google.com/amp/s/thenationonlineng.net/nigerian-doctor-shoots-self-wife-in-murder-suicide-in-us/amp/


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DHFAxXSBtfc

SMH... Another angry man without emotional intel.

@jedisco

Hello, good afternoon

You didn't reach out, she said she didn't get a chat from a strange number

I had to codedly ask cos she doesn't know I'm trying to hook her up

I trust you must have checked her out on whatsapp right?

Have a lovely day ahead.

jedisco:


Feminist movement or not, the time has come when we have to accept there's been a change in cultural dogma and we try and make the best of it. Western nations passed through this phase in times past and their ladies will never accept to go back to those 'dark ages' as they'd say.

While the ills of single parenthood is well researched, blaming it on the woman alone is too simple.
Same also with the link you shared.... I'm very careful when careful when certain narratives start getting pushed in the western media. Look at almost all the comments there... It's all about limiting migration of blacks or deporting them. I've seen this over and over again. Just before Brexit or any major clampdown on immigration, the media is full with one-sided stories. After it all happens, the truth begins to filter out.


The issues with some black commuties in the West are multifactorial and sadly it's now become a positive feedback cycle that seems to get worse. But a huge part of what drove it was decades of state sponsored discrimination and deprivation against such communities and not black women as the media would have us believe. How about black men? Wouldn't they also take responsibility for the state of their communities?

Take Nigeria for example, a state that purposely habours 2 million out of school kids wandering the streets is bound to produce millions of deliquent youths in future. Now turning round to solely blame those youths im future is wrong.

Honestly no insult.....u didn't mk any sense to me

sonnie10:
One common issue spouse have when the wife is a nurse is time management. Running the home and work schedule.
It comes down to maintaining a balance between. I will go further to give some details of most prevalent scenario.
As a nurse in the US, you are able to afford most luxury; any car, house, clothing, vacation and jewelries but you must put in the time for work.

If you work one regular 40hours a week job, you might not be that financially ok when you consider bills.

Now, here is where the common problem is, nurses are well sort after and the opportunity to work extra jobs are plenty. The downside is that it takes away family time and wifely responsibilities. Most husbands do not want that but the greed for dollars and the good things the wives can get with it blocks any form compromise with the husband. The common rebuttal is usually; are you not the man? Why don’t you provide those things then? Me that I want to try why are you stopping me? Imagine what happens in a home where the wife works 16hour at two jobs and only comes home to sleep when the husband is probably away at his own job.

Let me tell you this, a nurse that works only 40 hours a week can never comfortably afford a Land Rover valor or Lexus Gx or Mercedes glc, it’s impossible. So how is it that most of the nurses drive these cars?

They drive it because they work more and family responsibility is neglected. In the US, if you have young kids at school, your life and time is almost sacrificed for them.

Someone has to be there to get them ready, to drop them off at school and pick them up after school. Obviously, if the wife is a “hard working nurse” she can’t. The man has to pick up this extra responsibility and cut down his time for work; meaning less money for the man and more more for the wife. That is the correlation.

So, the result is that the wife is more financially buoyant than the man. It then comes a time when the wife wants to pay house rent for her brother in Nigeria who lives in lekki and had recently lost his job but the husband says no, she can’t.
Who gives him the right to decide what she can and cannot do with her hard earned money? Forgetting that he also made the sacrifices for her to be available to go to that work. The truth is that anyone can do two jobs in the US. ( Go check the families that both husband and wife work two full time jobs, their children are always in trouble)
Ideally, this is not how it is judged by external advisers and even the wife themselves.

The judgement is usually this way; you are the man, why can’t you provide for your family, why let your wife suffer to work and you want to control her. The statement has sent many men to early grave This is bringing a man to the lowest of low. A man that has sacrificed his time, job, pride and almost everything hoping for a better family.

Bravo ! Top notch analysis

lightpurple:


Most parent prefer to send their male kids overseas to study, in the hopes that they would take care of the remaining family in Nigeria.

When these guys come here, through whatever means- student, marrying an American or visa lottery, their first instinct is to show people back home that they have ‘arrived’. Whatever menial job they do, they always have the Dollars to Naira exchange rate at the back of their mind, so any penny they earn seems big in Naira. They start pricing 2 plots of lands in Nigeria.

Anyone who you seek advise on how to make it in the US will tell you that you have to get schooled and at least, hold a US degree or certification, the higher the better obviously. But these men are deceived by the fast change they earn that they absolutely refuse to go to school. Secondly because they feel it will be too stressful, afterall in Nigeria, they are big men now.

If you didn’t know, anything healthcare is the best profession for immigrants, as long as you are licensed in the US. You can’t be a lawyer or teacher or banker being that it has a lot to deal with customer services, for which your accent is a barrier. Nursing is the most sought after career in the US in relation to job security.

When Nigerian men find a spouse and bring her to the US, they quickly encourage her to do something in healthcare, preferably Nursing. Now being that this Jesus like husband who has delivered her from the hands of Nigeria is encouraging her to go to school, she wouldn’t say no she wants fast money like him. She has to go to school, no matter her age, level of education, degree of embarrassment or stress she would have to go through to learn in a foreign land. Like you are 5x slower than your classmates in everything because it’s a new system..you are a new immigrant. And in the US, you are also encouraged to work at least a couple of hours while in school, to help build your resume and skills. So the ladies go to school, work sparingly and also take care of the household, still so so grateful.

After completing this education, could take anywhere from 4-8 years depending on the degree you pursue, she obviously starts earning more than her husband. At this point her husband feels like he has invested completely so there is no need to work, or to work too much.

For the first couple of years she would be ok because she is still grateful for his support, but as demand and expenses increases, both in her home and in Nigeria, she feels the weight of carry the financial burden of her family, as well as her her innate duties as a woman of the house. She starts putting in overtime and all, all the while asking her husband if there is any career he would like to pursue or certification to get a professional work to assist financially. But the Nigerian men refuses to have anything to do with education. They would rather tell you takes of their containers and how someone played them in Nigeria. If she dares ask him to help out more in the house while she puts in extra work, it is finished. She has become Americanized.

Now this woman keeps going higher in education, due to peer pressure and all. Mind you, her coworkers had the good sense to marry someone in their field or even higher, and they show her pictures of their purchases, expensive trips, that they deserve because they worked hard for it. But this Nigerian man is keeping his wife from attaining that position simply because she is singlehandedly providing for the family.

Sweet bitterness creeps in, that so called gratitude for bringing her to the US expires. Then you hear all these stories that touch.

I was following u but no
ticed u are too make biased....u narrate as doi the males are too senseless or as dou all men dt kill tgier wives in d US are illiterates....

Stop supporting bad ting...be open minded...the ladies are very much ungrateful

cococandy:
Now imagine in myriads of situations all over the world where the wife has to cut back her income bringing hours in order to take care of the home. Because she’s the woman of course.

How many of those women have killed their husbands because he didn’t let her dictate how the money is spent? Don’t you people encourage her to be satisfied with whatever he can provide. He’s a good husband for even trying. Why is this same consideration not extended to women?

Y’all can’t take half of what you dish and that’s why you get frustrated. Equality can be frustrating for those who have never had to consider the wellbeing of others.

Cococandy...ur just deceiving urself...in a very good happy family where the man provides everything ..if he loses his job..the women tend to stay for highest 1year if it doesn't look up good. They leave even in Nigeria

jedisco:


Then why can't these men marry already established White ladies?
They have lived in the West but still opt for a Nigerian lady... That should tell you something. The problems you'd encouter with the White lady is on another level.
Fact is that it's much more likely for a Nigerian man (born in 9ja) in the West to have a successful union with someone of same race and background. That's a fact that cuts across everyone?

That person (wife or not) is a human. That you facilitated yhe persons travel, paid for their schooling e.t.c gives you no right to Lord it over them. That's not how the West works.

Have you ever asked yourself if the mrn do anything that makes the wife turn around?

Y due ppl in Nigeria live all their love lives in on region ( not theirs by origin).. But still return to marry their tribe...?

The answer answer ur question

Preetti:
From all I read on this thread i can boldly say most sane Nigerian men are not on nairaland

Good luck on twitter

Baby father looks damn too good right now

cococandy:



How many wives kill their husbands for infidelity?
Always quick to spout that theory as if it excuses murder. Many of you would be dead if y’all’s wives decided to go through with the rage they feel when you’re unfaithful. Stop it.

Nairalandwizerd:
that's why we are men. Continue sleeping around and I assure you Las Las, your husband will still shoot you dead.

Hahaha #SavageReplies

CSTRR:

Nigerian immigrant life is nonsense.
Be specific.

Indian women are CEO of fortune 500 companies, yet they don't misbehave at home.

Ordinary Nigerian Nurse would think she has arrived.

It is an ingrained streak of Arrogance, Pride and Ungratefulness.
And they like to rub it-in because they know the laws will allow them to abuse the husband.
I guess the Men too have found a way out to PAY-BACK.
Blow-off the head of the Motherfcuker and let God in heaven be the Judge.

angelfallz:


Lol. why would i have a promiscuous woman as a wife?
Also, lets say my wife is promiscuous and i find out, do you think i would go around shouting fear women? No. she leaves my house immediately let her go and find a new husband.

Now there are men out there that cheat on their wives, i haven't heard you say "fear men", why?

Why would she leave your house You should've allowed her stay instead. You're just misquoting yourself my guy.

Zooposki:


But he also tried killing both his 21year old sons. What was their crime?

Maybe he found out they weren't his