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Should I Marry A Divorcee wih Two Children or Opt To Be His Baby Mama For N10m? - Romance - Nairaland

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Should I Marry A Divorcee wih Two Children or Opt To Be His Baby Mama For N10m? by Nousername4356: 2:14pm On Jan 17, 2021
Hello Fam,
Happy sunday to you all.
I am in a dilemma right now and I dont know what to do. I have been seeing a particular man for about 2yrs. All seems well with him except for the fact that he is legally divorced with 2 kids. He is all any lady could dream of but family and friends strongly advised me against marrying him. They say that it's wrong wrong choice for me, that his exwife would always be in his life since they have 2 male children together, that the exwife could even resort to fetish means,that being in Africa doesnt even help matters, that I would be at a big disadvantage.
This man loves me, adores me, respects me and puts me first in anything. I met him at one of my 'lowest' moments in life and he was like heaven sent.My church is not in support, my family and frnds feel I am too young to put myself in such a tight situation. His exwife is very quarrelsome and I dont like stress.I am scared, I dont want trouble. I dont even have that kind of tolerance level. However He is still persistent, has been for over 2years now..still promising me that nothing would go wrong. He is even offering me N10m to at least be his baby mama if I am not willing to marry him in the interim. All the while, he has respected my body when I told him I wasnt willing to have sex with him. I am 27. I am thinking of forgetting everything all together, I just am not sure of what to do....
Re: Should I Marry A Divorcee wih Two Children or Opt To Be His Baby Mama For N10m? by OlayemiAshraf(m): 2:18pm On Jan 17, 2021
10millli to be his baby mama... what are you waiting for? Collect ham joor...

4 Likes

Re: Should I Marry A Divorcee wih Two Children or Opt To Be His Baby Mama For N10m? by InfernoNig: 2:18pm On Jan 17, 2021
I won't advice you to be his baby mama. But I will advice you to follow you heart.

1 Like 3 Shares

Re: Should I Marry A Divorcee wih Two Children or Opt To Be His Baby Mama For N10m? by Nobody: 2:19pm On Jan 17, 2021
I wish I could give a positive advice, but after facing my own wahala, whatever wrong will go wrong, even you marry him issues, if you don't issues , regardless of what choice you choose, nothing but demise await all of us regardless of our intent. You could leave him and find a wrong choice or marry him and deal with all the wahala that comes with it. There's no happy ending dear, just choose your own demise is all I will say. Sorry for being negative but that's just real life. We are all doomed eventually

14 Likes

Re: Should I Marry A Divorcee wih Two Children or Opt To Be His Baby Mama For N10m? by UncleKoboko: 2:20pm On Jan 17, 2021
Weyrey
You don't need any advice...
What you'll do is in your mind already...
Re: Should I Marry A Divorcee wih Two Children or Opt To Be His Baby Mama For N10m? by ShackWes(f): 2:21pm On Jan 17, 2021
some questions are meant to be directed to one's ancestors and not SM
Re: Should I Marry A Divorcee wih Two Children or Opt To Be His Baby Mama For N10m? by OlayemiAshraf(m): 2:23pm On Jan 17, 2021
Elo lowo Ori re.. so gba 10million naira

1 Like 1 Share

Re: Should I Marry A Divorcee wih Two Children or Opt To Be His Baby Mama For N10m? by Womanizer(m): 2:24pm On Jan 17, 2021
Na which kind dilemma be this sef?
Re: Should I Marry A Divorcee wih Two Children or Opt To Be His Baby Mama For N10m? by Nousername4356: 2:24pm On Jan 17, 2021
pcguru1:
I wish I could give a positive advice, but after facing my own wahala, whatever wrong will go wrong, even you marry him issues, if you don't issues , regardless of what choice you choose, nothing but demise await all of us regardless of our intent. You could leave him and find a wrong choice or marry him and deal with all the wahala that comes with it. There's no happy ending dear, just choose your own demise is all I will say. Sorry for being negative but that's just real life. We are all doomed eventually

Hmmm..thanks but is the wahala that comes with it usually worth it?
Re: Should I Marry A Divorcee wih Two Children or Opt To Be His Baby Mama For N10m? by Nousername4356: 2:26pm On Jan 17, 2021
UncleKoboko:
Weyrey
You don't need any advice...
What you'll do is in your mind already...

Lolz..abi make I forget everything? I feel like running away..
Re: Should I Marry A Divorcee wih Two Children or Opt To Be His Baby Mama For N10m? by Kobicove(m): 2:26pm On Jan 17, 2021
Is it that you're so ugly that you can't get an unattached single guy to show interest in you? undecided
Re: Should I Marry A Divorcee wih Two Children or Opt To Be His Baby Mama For N10m? by Nousername4356: 2:27pm On Jan 17, 2021
InfernoNig:
I won't advice you to be his baby mama. But I will advice you to follow you heart.

My heart says Yes but my mind says No
Re: Should I Marry A Divorcee wih Two Children or Opt To Be His Baby Mama For N10m? by Nousername4356: 2:28pm On Jan 17, 2021
OlayemiAshraf:
10millli to be his baby mama... what are you waiting for? Collect ham joor...

Lol! You feel so?
Re: Should I Marry A Divorcee wih Two Children or Opt To Be His Baby Mama For N10m? by Nobody: 2:29pm On Jan 17, 2021
Nousername4356:


Hmmm..thanks but is the wahala that comes with it usually worth it?

The only way to find out is to engage in it, who knows ? It might toughen you as a person, it just a matter of how much of a masochist you are. Left to me, I'd rather go with mindset that I'll do what it can to find someone that will treat me right , rather than settling but I also get it too, you can marry for love and the person might not offer you as much as you'd want when this baby mama parole can work, ill be honest with you, the game is the game, we are all here just forming Saint, within us demon dey, if such offer were made for guys, lot of guys will jump in it. So it all depends on you, do you want to be in love or be comfortable? If you are looking for Happy ending marriage in Lagos good luck. Like I said we are doomed anyway.
Re: Should I Marry A Divorcee wih Two Children or Opt To Be His Baby Mama For N10m? by InfernoNig: 2:30pm On Jan 17, 2021
Nousername4356:


My heart says Yes but my mind says No

You have to make the decision yourself. No one will do it for you
Re: Should I Marry A Divorcee wih Two Children or Opt To Be His Baby Mama For N10m? by Sunnymatey(m): 2:31pm On Jan 17, 2021
If you love him, pls marry him. He is LEGALLY divorced so his ex has no business interfering in your home.
Every other issue can be sorted.

We all condemn Regina for marrying Ned but what matters most is her happiness where she is now.
Re: Should I Marry A Divorcee wih Two Children or Opt To Be His Baby Mama For N10m? by Nousername4356: 2:31pm On Jan 17, 2021
Kobicove:
Is it that you're so ugly that you can't get an unattached single guy to show interest in you? undecided

Well, I dont know that one sad..but you feel I can get someone else right?
Re: Should I Marry A Divorcee wih Two Children or Opt To Be His Baby Mama For N10m? by Mikester: 2:32pm On Jan 17, 2021
Don't mistake those that are around you for those who are there for you. That man seems to be up to something. Nothing is free in this world. No sane man who worked his ass to where he is now would just want to lavish such amount of money on a non family member. I don't trust his agenda

4 Likes

Re: Should I Marry A Divorcee wih Two Children or Opt To Be His Baby Mama For N10m? by Nousername4356: 2:32pm On Jan 17, 2021
Womanizer:
Na which kind dilemma be this sef?

What to do now...
Re: Should I Marry A Divorcee wih Two Children or Opt To Be His Baby Mama For N10m? by Nousername4356: 2:33pm On Jan 17, 2021
Sunnymatey:
If you love him, pls marry him. He is LEGALLY divorced so his ex has no business interfering in your home.
Every other issue can be sorted.

We all condemn Regina for marrying Ned but what matters most is her happiness where she is now.

Hmmmmmm..thanks for your advice
Re: Should I Marry A Divorcee wih Two Children or Opt To Be His Baby Mama For N10m? by Denique(f): 2:41pm On Jan 17, 2021
I don't know your faith but according to God's word, it is a sin to marry a divorcee...he remains married to his ex before God. Only death can bring a union to an end.

As a babe and one bound by the constitution of Nigeria, it is not illegal to do so.

As a gold digger, I'd say, be a baby mama. 10m plus other Alhajis and/or Chiefs.

As it is my tradition, after every advice, I always leave the decision making to the advice seeker so they can never say I ruined their lives.

In the meantime, drop his number, pls. I'd like to counsel you two. wink
Re: Should I Marry A Divorcee wih Two Children or Opt To Be His Baby Mama For N10m? by Nousername4356: 2:42pm On Jan 17, 2021
pcguru1:


The only way to find out is to engage in it, who knows ? It might toughen you as a person, it just a matter of how much of a masochist you are. Left to me, I'd rather go with mindset that I'll do what it can to find someone that will treat me right , rather than settling but I also get it too, you can marry for love and the person might not offer you as much as you'd want when this baby mama parole can work, ill be honest with you, the game is the game, we are all here just forming Saint, within us demon dey, if such offer were made for guys, lot of guys will jump in it. So it all depends on you, do you want to be in love or be comfortable? If you are looking for Happy ending marriage in Lagos good luck. Like I said we are doomed anyway.

Lolzz .I want to be in love..I want to be comfortable.. I want my man all to my self. Gosh, I am not perfect but i deserve it. In spite of my imperfection, I have worked so hard for it..so hard. Look I just wannna be happy thatz all
Re: Should I Marry A Divorcee wih Two Children or Opt To Be His Baby Mama For N10m? by Nousername4356: 2:45pm On Jan 17, 2021
Mikester:
Don't mistake those that are around you for those who are there for you. That man seems to be up to something. Nothing is free in this world. No sane man who worked his ass to where he is now would just want to lavish such amount of money on a non family member. I don't trust his agenda

Hmmmmm..maybe...but he has been a good good friend and lover. Also, he can afford that amount of money without neccesarily breaking the bank.
Re: Should I Marry A Divorcee wih Two Children or Opt To Be His Baby Mama For N10m? by Mikester: 2:47pm On Jan 17, 2021
Nousername4356:


My heart says Yes but my mind says No
The heart is not enough in making decisions. The mind and gut feeling are mostly accurate. If you feel something is wrong somewhere, chances are there is. You need to leave love aside now and be logical

- If he was so perfect, why did his wife leave?
- Why is he seemingly obsessed with you?
- Would you want your child to be like him?

You need to ponder on this

1 Like

Re: Should I Marry A Divorcee wih Two Children or Opt To Be His Baby Mama For N10m? by Kobicove(m): 2:49pm On Jan 17, 2021
Nousername4356:


Well, I dont know that one sad..but you feel I can get someone else right?

Of course you can.
Re: Should I Marry A Divorcee wih Two Children or Opt To Be His Baby Mama For N10m? by Mikester: 2:49pm On Jan 17, 2021
Nousername4356:


Hmmmmm..maybe...but he has been a good good friend and lover. Also, he can afford that amount of money without neccesarily breaking the bank.
If that is how you see it...
Re: Should I Marry A Divorcee wih Two Children or Opt To Be His Baby Mama For N10m? by Nousername4356: 2:50pm On Jan 17, 2021
InfernoNig:


You have to make the decision yourself. No one will do it for you

Yes that's why I need counsel from people that have been through a similar situation b4.
Re: Should I Marry A Divorcee wih Two Children or Opt To Be His Baby Mama For N10m? by Nobody: 2:55pm On Jan 17, 2021
This so called man "love" you but want you to be his baby mama for 10 million naira.

I know your story smell of fake fake fake fake
Re: Should I Marry A Divorcee wih Two Children or Opt To Be His Baby Mama For N10m? by Nousername4356: 3:01pm On Jan 17, 2021
Mikester:

The heart is not enough in making decisions. The mind and gut feeling are mostly accurate. If you feel something is wrong somewhere, chances are there is. You need to leave love aside now and be logical

- If he was so perfect, why did his wife leave?
- Why is he seemingly obsessed with you?
- Would you want your child to be like him?

You need to ponder on this


Hmmmm...word!
Well according to him, the wife left on her own accord. She was keeping late nights without any justification neither was she remorseful. That caused lots of arguments and friction in the marriage. He claimed he was never violent with her and even went to her family house to beg her to come back but she refused. Calling him 'done and dusted"
About the obsession part, me I dont know oo. He just seemed to like me very much. Too much perhaps..he calls me 'raw gold'
Well, I would like my child to have some semblance with him in some areas, although not all areas
Re: Should I Marry A Divorcee wih Two Children or Opt To Be His Baby Mama For N10m? by Nousername4356: 3:08pm On Jan 17, 2021
thebosstrevor1:
This so called man "love" you but want you to be his baby mama for 10 million naira.

I know your story smell of fake fake fake fake

Lol! Ok
Re: Should I Marry A Divorcee wih Two Children or Opt To Be His Baby Mama For N10m? by Mikester: 3:10pm On Jan 17, 2021
Nousername4356:


Hmmmm...word!
Well according to him, the wife left on her own accord. She was keeping late nights without any justification neither was she remorseful. That caused lots of arguments and friction in the marriage. He claimed he was never violent with her and even went to her family house to beg her to come back but she refused. Calling him 'done and dusted"
About the obsession part, me I dont know oo. He just seemed to like me very much. Too much perhaps..he calls me 'raw gold'
Well, I would like my child to have some semblance with him in some areas, although not all areas
But you somehow don't feel safe making the decision of marrying him and I presume you also hate to be just his baby mama. You feel deep down that it might not be best to give in to him as creating this thread has shown. Ma'am if you were my relative, I would advise against giving in to him just as your actual relatives did. Drop him. There is always someone better for whoever we leave behind. That's my mind on this.

1 Like

Re: Should I Marry A Divorcee wih Two Children or Opt To Be His Baby Mama For N10m? by Nousername4356: 3:13pm On Jan 17, 2021
Denique:
I don't know your faith but according to God's word, it is a sin to marry a divorcee...he remains married to his ex before God. Only death can bring a union to an end.

As a babe and one bound by the constitution of Nigeria, it is not illegal to do so.

As a gold digger, I'd say, be a baby mama. 10m plus other Alhajis and/or Chiefs.

As it is my tradition, after every advice, I always leave the decision making to the advice seeker so they can never say I ruined their lives.

In the meantime, drop his number, pls. I'd like to counsel you two. wink

Your no 1 point is the crux of the issue. I am scared I am going against God's word by proceeding to marry him. You know divorce is very controversial. At the same time, I am not sure if I will find someone as great as this guy. This guys treats me right! Just how I want and like it

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