Ishilove:

Hello sonofjos, thank you for sharing.

People like us who were born and raised here notice a marked difference in the tempo of activities in other areas of the country. I was in Ondo for a year and I almost ran mad there because life in that state is so... sleepy. Everyone was just moving like geriatric patients, unlike Lagos here where if you are too slow, you will be shoved aside. Last last when it was time to leave, I packed my travelling bags and two mighty Ghana-must-go bags and fled the place by 6am.

Lagos is a melting pot of different ethnic groups with different characters, both saintly and shady, so overtime it developed a character unique to it. We talk angrily a lot of the times because there is someone somewhere always trying to provoke you, cheat you, or steal from you so we are always on guard and on the defensive. Someone tried to pick my bag last year but the kind of eye I gave him must have turned his ancestors in their graves.

Add the congested roads and the traffic and you cannot be calm even if you try to. You will be angry for no reason. Yoruba people call it 'kan ra'. Pepper body. That is why danfo drivers behave like animals because one cannot sit inside hold up day in day out, inhaling noxious exhaust fumes, avoiding police, LASTMA, NURTW agbero, taskforce, police, VIO, those new ones wearing green uniform (I don't know these ones. There are so many uniforms in Lagos) and still be completely sane.

Conductors and passengers fighting is a normal thing. One day I was returning from work and saw two fighting in the middle of the road, and what amazed me was they were sparring like professional boxers, complete with the boxer's stance and leg work. iKid you not. Conductor and passenger. It was the agberos, funny enough, who came to chase them from the road because they were constituting nuisance to other road users. The kid you described did not have any super powers. He was just acting like the typical Lagosian who has been conditioned to act out in the face of provocation. Eat or be eaten. Some of these conductors are very rude and nasty (I suspect it is their own defence mechanism) while some passengers on the other hand are idiots.

The trader in Computer Village was not 'threatening' you. They are simply aggressive marketers. If you don't aggressively market your products you won't make any sales because there a 1001 traders selling the same thing as you. The secret to walking successfully through the Village is rearranging your face to look like granite, avoiding eye contact with anyone and stubbornly ignoring 'threatening'' calls. They cannot hijack you from the road into their shop, abi? Develop military mind!

The same military mind my friend Sanchez01 took to Enugu when he went on a visit. He wanted to board a bus and used ishon (muscle) to run pell mell to where the bus was parked waiting for him. When he jumped in with the skill of a James Bond stuntsman, he met the driver and passengers staring at him strangely.

The driver asked him: "Oga, are you from Lagos?", to which he replied in the affirmative. The driver then remarked "No wonder. It is only Lagos people that behave like they are fighting with everyone."

You definitely killed it. You 100% on point.

Sanchez01:

I almost ran mad in Enugu at first. I thought it was too slow for normal humans to dwell in. Imagine transport vehicles waiting for you after you flag them down. Most of them will even reverse to you no matter how far they had gone.

Life in Lagos is not normal. If you stay too long in Lagos, normal stuff becomes abnormal when you see them outside Lagos.

Very true bro. I remember when I went for Law school Agbani at Enugu. Anytime I go outside campus to either Ogbete or Gariki, I keep rushing for vehicles and I keep getting amused when they slow down, reverse or wait for you. Even the conductors don't collect money until you are almost at your bustop. It was really a peaceful time. I almost adapted. But once I got to Ojota and saw danfo and sweaty red-eyed conductors, my hustling spirit returned. Lagos ehnnn. Survival of the fittest (and the divinely blessed)

Funny comments... We for Lagos no dey complain na, it's called Total package... if you smile too much, you'll be taken for granted, and if you frown too much they'll say you lack good attitude, we're all trying to survive ni

sonofjos:
Dear lagosians,

Please pardon the grammatic errors.

Being born and bred in the north, I am conditioned to a certain societal behaviour that the first time I went to Lagos, interacting and seeing the people was a bit of a cultural shock to me. I've travelled to many states in the North and few in the south and almost all seemed just about the same as home.

But the first time I visited Lagos a few years ago I had many experiences that made it seem as if was in another country entirely. I'll share a few notable ones.

Please note that I'm not looking for trouble, I'm just giving a honest opinion

It was as if everyone seemd to converse harshly over very simple transactions. One would think they know each other from somewhere.
Many people in the public seemed angry as a default mode. I wondered why.

I boarded a bus to computer village and a primary school kid later joined and was later exchanging very hot words with the conductor who was a very muscular guy over some trivial amount. I watched with interest and it got to a point where I feared for the little guy because If that conductor decided to as much as slap the small boy, there won't be much left. But somehow the conductor calmed down as if he had met a worthy opponent. That boy seemed to me as if he had super powers.

I joined another bus and a fight broke out between the conductor and a passenger. Both of whom were muscular. None would hear sorry. The fight got so bad that the both ended with broken faces and the passenger got a rock and shattered off both side mirrors of the bus. Since I intended to join night bus home, I kukuma dropped and joined okada (it was legal then) which was much more expensive but worth it. I don't know how they ended.

I noticed many young people are muscular body builders. I wonder why.

I was walking on a street at computer village and a guy started threatening and commanding me to come over. At first, I thought he was speaking to someone else when I realised there was no one around me, and he made it clear he was referring to me. Till today, I don't know what confidence made me to keep walking. That was how I escaped O.

Everyone seems to be in hell of a rush.
I even said that if rapture takes place, Lagos would not know anything had happened for two weeks.

But Behind all these seemingly negative atmosphere, I discovered that lagosians are very kind people. Always willing to help.
As a stranger, I found it difficult to find places and routes. But almost anyone you ask is very willing to show you directions. I've had instances where people left their comfort to walk me to places where they gave me directions. Very welcoming set of people to strangers I tell you.

All these mixed experiences made me say that Lagosians are Indeed a very strange people.

Many other things I've experienced at Lagos over my other subsequent visits, but Lagos has remained strange to me.

I mean no disrespect to anyone, I'm just a fellow countryman who wants to better know my country.

My question to you guys is, why is Lagos the way it is?

Is there anything I missed or misunderstood about Lagos?

Thanks

That's why it's called no man's land

I nearly missed my flight to port harcourt because of Lagos traffic and I was almost in front of the air port but the traffic was to die for
I had to leave the car I was in ,I was carrying my baby and luggage
Flagged down a bike I was charged 3k with abeg even though the airport was 5mins away from me
Even when I got there they have closed boarding I begged and begged and was pitied because of my baby
I can’t live in Lagos
The traffic is terrible

Sulawesi:


Your father and mother are both unfortunate idìot zombies

You're still unfortunate, it's so unfortunate that you are

BadBradley:
you just officially told us lagosians are socially and behaviourally mal-adjusted.

They will always be odd and negative anywhere they go.

Someone should tell this is lezz. It's been a minute breh.

Peppysco:


You're still unfortunate, it's so unfortunate that you are

You're not just unfortunate you're a curse embodied in human form...an abomination soon to be wiped off the face of God's earth

nwaanambra1:


On a normal level, by normal level i mean equal opportunity- you will beat chimanda hands down.

looking forward to hearing your name up there one day.

Thank you

Ishilove:

Hello sonofjos, thank you for sharing.

People like us who were born and raised here notice a marked difference in the tempo of activities in other areas of the country. I was in Ondo for a year and I almost ran mad there because life in that state is so... sleepy. Everyone was just moving like geriatric patients, unlike Lagos here where if you are too slow, you will be shoved aside. Last last when it was time to leave, I packed my travelling bags and two mighty Ghana-must-go bags and fled the place by 6am.

Lagos is a melting pot of different ethnic groups with different characters, both saintly and shady, so overtime it developed a character unique to it. We talk angrily a lot of the times because there is someone somewhere always trying to provoke you, cheat you, or steal from you so we are always on guard and on the defensive. Someone tried to pick my bag last year but the kind of eye I gave him must have turned his ancestors in their graves.

Add the congested roads and the traffic and you cannot be calm even if you try to. You will be angry for no reason. Yoruba people call it 'kan ra'. Pepper body. That is why danfo drivers behave like animals because one cannot sit inside hold up day in day out, inhaling noxious exhaust fumes, avoiding police, LASTMA, NURTW agbero, taskforce, police, VIO, those new ones wearing green uniform (I don't know these ones. There are so many uniforms in Lagos) and still be completely sane.

Conductors and passengers fighting is a normal thing. One day I was returning from work and saw two fighting in the middle of the road, and what amazed me was they were sparring like professional boxers, complete with the boxer's stance and leg work. iKid you not. Conductor and passenger. It was the agberos, funny enough, who came to chase them from the road because they were constituting nuisance to other road users. The kid you described did not have any super powers. He was just acting like the typical Lagosian who has been conditioned to act out in the face of provocation. Eat or be eaten. Some of these conductors are very rude and nasty (I suspect it is their own defence mechanism) while some passengers on the other hand are idiots.

The trader in Computer Village was not 'threatening' you. They are simply aggressive marketers. If you don't aggressively market your products you won't make any sales because there a 1001 traders selling the same thing as you. The secret to walking successfully through the Village is rearranging your face to look like granite, avoiding eye contact with anyone and stubbornly ignoring 'threatening'' calls. They cannot hijack you from the road into their shop, abi? Develop military mind!

The same military mind my friend Sanchez01 took to Enugu when he went on a visit. He wanted to board a bus and used ishon (muscle) to run pell mell to where the bus was parked waiting for him. When he jumped in with the skill of a James Bond stuntsman, he met the driver and passengers staring at him strangely.

The driver asked him: "Oga, are you from Lagos?", to which he replied in the affirmative. The driver then remarked "No wonder. It is only Lagos people that behave like they are fighting with everyone."

Well written, dear

Everybody in Lagos is angry....I mean very very angry. .... Extremely angry!

Sulawesi:


You're not just unfortunate you're a curse embodied in human form...an abomination soon to be wiped off the face of God's earth

You reason like an idiot with a rat's sized brain. But the truth is, you're still an unfortunate idiot. Last post to you, enjoy it

Lagos is a place under constant motion without movement.

Whenever I visit Lagos, I always marvel at how people hustle hard to eke a living. The place is all about struggle, hustle, hard life, rush rush and angry people. I'm always wondering if such lifestyle would eventually change in future. Even if I reside in Lagos in future, I can never adopt such pattern of life. Life ought to nice and easy.

obontami:


Someone should tell this is lezz. It's been a minute breh.

what?

Sanchez01:

Eh!

Ishi, your memory strength scares me

Thattallgirl:


I heard of a young lady who boarded a bus here and instead of her to say "o wa o" she started shouting "there is there is"... people were confused until someone got what she meant and said "o ni o wa o"

This almost got me embarrassed here. I laughed so hard...

decatalyst:


Well written, dear

Thanks!

damosky12:




This almost got me embarrassed here. I laughed so hard...

Sorry

You are staying in Lagos and u want to be normal... It's impossible na

sonofjos:


My question to you guys is, why is Lagos the way it is?

Is there anything I missed or misunderstood about Lagos?

Lagos ....... New York City.... Tokyo and Chicago are quite similar in terms of all the stuff you mentioned... but Lagos is more ehmmm... out there! That apparent rugged attitude is what one has to adapt to survive in these cities. You missed mentioning 'noise level'.... 24/7 ... no time for peace and quiet. Out of towners are affected by noise.... the hustle and bustle ... everyone is in a hurry. Big city people do not hear such noises as traffic... sirens... construction noises... these are all automatically cancelled out.... they are deaf to these noises... while the same noises are super loud to the ears of out of towners. On the other hand.... sounds of crickets...... frogs... birds are cancelled out by out of towners.... but should a Lagosian go out into quiet areas...... he will hear every cricket..... every frog... every bird... all verrrry loud to him while unnoticed by the locals. As a city person.... I need noise... sounds of life around me 24/7. Whenever I leave the city(I rarely do)...... go to picturesque, quiet and very peaceful and laid back areas.... the quietness stresses the hell out of me..... can't sleep in peace because of fear .... fear of the quietness telling me something bad is about to go down... but I have no clue what it is... how on earth can I sleep? I always return to the city ASAP to enjoy my peace of mind in the midst of chaos!

Interesting thread.

Peppysco:


[s]You reason like an idiot with a rat's sized brain. But the truth is, you're still an unfortunate idiot. Last post to you, enjoy it[/s]

Keep screaming unfortunate since you're so obsessed with ill-fortune

By the grace of the Almighty, who does not abide injustice, ill-fortune shall be your lot even as you take your last putrid breath.

nnamdiosu:


Ish chai ...I just dey read this dey laugh

What you just posted needs to be printed out, laminated and placed in a big board at the entrance of Lagos for everyone coming into Lagos to read and sign under.


It can't be better said.
You see, although I was born and bred in Lagos too, when I was transfered to asaba for some years, I now adopted their calm life style. When I got back to Lagos, my heart beat Everytime I wanted to leave the house.

It shows when crossing road. People in asaba wait till everywhere is cleared of cars, keke, lizards, birds, even ants. But in Lagos, there is a joy we experience when we cross road with car or okada or keke rushing at you. As you successfully swerve , dive, jump, curse them back, you feel like you've gotten a master's degree


It shows in how early the artisans wake up to open their shops. In asaba, by 9, shops might not have opened. In Lagos (especially during school academic calendar, by 6 am, shops have opened)


It's well.
The joy of Nigeria is that we are like a country of countries. Unlike other countries where anywhere you travel, you see the same food, culture, language and behaviour, Nigeria was/is lucky to have multiple personalities in various geographic locations.


Nigeria would have been the best country. If not for 'them'.

Infact this is the best write up, I have read so far..... Kudos man.

RSVP:
Lagos is one beautiful hell you'd love to live in when you master the craft very well.

For someone that was born and brought up in IB, lived some decent years in Abk then I thought I should try Lagos the land of opportunity

Few days living in Lagos then I began to realize I'm into big problem. My style and everything about me doesn't just fit in. It seems almost everyone I had an encounter with are mad at me for no reason. You can't even look them in the face bcuz they would make it look like you are about to start a fight or something. Then I started avoiding public places. To enter bus will be problem cuz the conductor will want to hold your change and you will have to talk more than 5times before he even remember you were sitting.

After few months in Lagos then I noticed a drastic change in my DNA. I started getting aggressive for no reason
I began deh yab them If I price my transport fare and the conductor no gree .. I swear for your papa straight and won't mind your response. I started walking like an elephant with my lege lege stature accompany with a very tight angry face now


Tried living in IB again and I got seriously bored. Imagine people won't open shops at 9am In IB and they won't even budge if you stand infront of their shop to buy something. .. I just dey look dem somehow and dem dey look me as a crazy fellow.. Lol

Dem no know say nah Lagos cuz ham

Infact God will deliver us from the kind of live we are living in Lagos. 85% of people living in the state, end up spending their monthly salary in the state, year in, year out without anything to show for it.

and am planning to move to Lagos this year ooo wahala for me

[quote author=SoNature post=98393620]Most Lagosians are literarily mad and they don't even know it. [/quote
Who told you they don't know it? Some people will even tell you " ... Woo nio gbadun oo"�

[quote author=SoNature post=98393620]Most Lagosians are literarily mad and they don't even know it. [/quote
Who told you they don't know it? Some people will even tell you " ... Woo mio gbadun oo"�

Ishilove:

Hello sonofjos, thank you for sharing.

People like us who were born and raised here notice a marked difference in the tempo of activities in other areas of the country. I was in Ondo for a year and I almost ran mad there because life in that state is so... sleepy. Everyone was just moving like geriatric patients, unlike Lagos here where if you are too slow, you will be shoved aside. Last last when it was time to leave, I packed my travelling bags and two mighty Ghana-must-go bags and fled the place by 6am.

Lagos is a melting pot of different ethnic groups with different characters, both saintly and shady, so overtime it developed a character unique to it. We talk angrily a lot of the times because there is someone somewhere always trying to provoke you, cheat you, or steal from you so we are always on guard and on the defensive. Someone tried to pick my bag last year but the kind of eye I gave him must have turned his ancestors in their graves.

Add the congested roads and the traffic and you cannot be calm even if you try to. You will be angry for no reason. Yoruba people call it 'kan ra'. Pepper body. That is why danfo drivers behave like animals because one cannot sit inside hold up day in day out, inhaling noxious exhaust fumes, avoiding police, LASTMA, NURTW agbero, taskforce, police, VIO, those new ones wearing green uniform (I don't know these ones. There are so many uniforms in Lagos) and still be completely sane.

Conductors and passengers fighting is a normal thing. One day I was returning from work and saw two fighting in the middle of the road, and what amazed me was they were sparring like professional boxers, complete with the boxer's stance and leg work. iKid you not. Conductor and passenger. It was the agberos, funny enough, who came to chase them from the road because they were constituting nuisance to other road users. The kid you described did not have any super powers. He was just acting like the typical Lagosian who has been conditioned to act out in the face of provocation. Eat or be eaten. Some of these conductors are very rude and nasty (I suspect it is their own defence mechanism) while some passengers on the other hand are idiots.

The trader in Computer Village was not 'threatening' you. They are simply aggressive marketers. If you don't aggressively market your products you won't make any sales because there a 1001 traders selling the same thing as you. The secret to walking successfully through the Village is rearranging your face to look like granite, avoiding eye contact with anyone and stubbornly ignoring 'threatening'' calls. They cannot hijack you from the road into their shop, abi? Develop military mind!

The same military mind my friend Sanchez01 took to Enugu when he went on a visit. He wanted to board a bus and used ishon (muscle) to run pell mell to where the bus was parked waiting for him. When he jumped in with the skill of a James Bond stuntsman, he met the driver and passengers staring at him strangely.

The driver asked him: "Oga, are you from Lagos?", to which he replied in the affirmative. The driver then remarked "No wonder. It is only Lagos people that behave like they are fighting with everyone."

Lovely write-up. I clap for you standing...

Ishilove:



Conductors and passengers fighting is a normal thing.

Ogbeni, there is nothing normal about this! LMAO! ����

trevorhorace:
Whenever I get to computer village, I dunno I the being I morph into. All I do know is I'm not myself anymore. All my senses are at their peaks. Laser targeted vision, optimum olfactory lobes, Zuma rock stone face. I could hear someone fart from the top of a high-rise building 10 miles ahead. And the alertness of an Israeli trained soldier.

On top memory card wey u wan buy? �����

That one na conductor na, not agbero .
If u shout for conductor gan, he will give u balance for taking u pass ur busstop as long as u don Dey talk since say*if u reach XY busstop, tell me o*

eagleonearth:
not all oo I remember my early years in Lagos then. Upon say I tell conductor where I'm going as I no know road, na so he collect money come carry me pass my bustop still stuck out his cannabis stained finger dey shout owoda for me. Haa I was amazed

nwaanambra1:


On a normal level, by normal level i mean equal opportunity- you will beat chimanda hands down.

looking forward to hearing your name up there one day.

yes she is that good.

May1st:



On top memory card wey u wan buy? �����

Bros even if na screen guard I wan buy, I no go lose guard. Because on top that memory card you fit no come back with your own memory.