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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / So many have been strong for too long (Picture) (1558 Views)
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So many have been strong for too long (Picture) by troublemakea(m): 9:01pm On Feb 04, 2021 |
While lotta folks went bout their Happy life I woke up to another day of sickening thought and Depressing day. Mum just by the side down with fibroid, being a final year student with nothing whilst school's started already n lectures begun, the other hand I got my lil siblings who who come back looking up to mama and I like Brother what's home to eat?? No I wouldn't let them feel bad lemme trek out and see if I'd get to see a Bricklaying job that can give me 1k atleast so I can make both of them Happy I thought to myself. It's fine so I set out, trekked kilometers visiting sites to sites asking if they'd need labourer all of them said No. What can I do I can return home the same. saw some men Digging the side of the road probably trying to make a covet or something. plead if they'd need some help, a man grown took pity on me after I explained what brought me out told me he really want to help me but he can't cuz after all the hard work of the day they'd have to wait till month end Bfr they get paid. Asked how much? this aged man told me it's just 20k and thought checking thr my condition he wouldn't wish such job for me but Prayed for me and wished me well. Oh, it's bout 3pm I'm really walking in deep into site I might find it hard trekking home so I turned back thinking to myself Imma just gonna return home like this with nothing achieved? well I think I've had enough bout life, mum I blame you cuz you wanted aborting me bout 22years ago who is the Nurse that tried so much to persuade you? I think I needed to see her and give her a punch but I can't even know her. But thank God I still got bout #600 left with me. What's the way out?? a small bottle of sniper would do I think I've had enough already I said. walked to this pharmacy as I treked home (Listening to some Celine Dion song hoping it'd be my last to ever hear her voice) got welcomed by this middle aged woman with a smile who offered me water seeing I look thirsty, I was humbled thanks ma'am I appreciated her and told her what i needed to buy a bottle of sniper. well she was somewhat inquisitive and asked is all okay?? Replied most definitely took my sniper n wrapped it in the nylon she gave me heading home in my heart wishing I never had to do this, can't a stray car just hit me and lemme be gone for good I wished. Hmmm |
Re: So many have been strong for too long (Picture) by troublemakea(m): 9:08pm On Feb 04, 2021 |
Even tho I tried as much as possible to get in the way of incoming vehicles but somehow they were always avoiding me like a plague and I'm like why won't this happen to people who needs it, why do vehicle have to hit people who did not plan for it? I guess that was an rhetorical question no one can answer to but me. Finally got home, saw my mum lay on the mat in the parlor sleeping and I was like Bfr she wake her son might have been gone Eyah. I wish I could wake her to apologize Bfr I do this but I wouldn't wanna disturb this woman I sneaked quietly to my room lay on my bed sobbing and thought so I'm really not gonna see this people no more? so Faith wouldn't have to hear my voice again? what a world I consoled myself and open the bottle and tried to pen down some words that's it'll at all it'd help relieve my Greefing mother |
Re: So many have been strong for too long (Picture) by troublemakea(m): 9:14pm On Feb 04, 2021 |
I tried writing as I cried uncontrollably reminiscing bout the good days at school, my friends the funny event I experienced and thought of how the other word is gonna look like. is it gonna be fun? is what we were all thought in Religion true?? I'm bout to find out but I hope I'm lucky I prayed n wished myself. Ion know what happened and how momma got to know I'm home, came to my room and saw my state and she was shocked. why are you doing this she asked crying and holding me telling me sheyb she has always taught us once there's life there's hope?? at this time she seized the bottle from me calling her pastor to come to her aid |
Re: So many have been strong for too long (Picture) by troublemakea(m): 9:22pm On Feb 04, 2021 |
Maybe I should have been faster n quick enough I thought but I'm not dead yet and momma's crying like this?? as she held me tight I can't but just can't see my momma in that state even in her sick state mann Her pastor was proactive and came around scolding me and rebuking me for such act but man say what you gotta say and just lemme the Bleep alone Bfr I could know it mum sister rushed as soon as she can calling my friends n all but is tha what i need?? everyone with one or two encouraging words that tried relieving me abit and hoping those words keep relieving me. This world is bleeped up, Life's useless or maybe some people shouldn't be created to be honest cuz creation isn't right. not everyone would wish to be born. I think god needs to ask us questions if we would love to be born or we wouldn't by then he'd make it more easier for humanity and mankind |
Re: So many have been strong for too long (Picture) by troublemakea(m): 9:28pm On Feb 04, 2021 |
If I've succumbed to every advice said today that I cannot tell yet but if I got to do the worse may God's mercy fall on me, may momma pardon me from the depth of her heart and may my siblings be strong and very strong most importantly may this bottle be kind to me taking me silently n without pain
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Re: So many have been strong for too long (Picture) by heendrix(m): 9:43pm On Feb 04, 2021 |
troublemakea: No matter what bro please suicide is not an option. if anything at all please think of ur poor mum who's gonna be the most affected of ur demise Please rethink bro |
Re: So many have been strong for too long (Picture) by tesseract: 9:44pm On Feb 04, 2021 |
Don't do it. Don't be stupid. |
Re: So many have been strong for too long (Picture) by Ofemmanu1: 10:01pm On Feb 04, 2021 |
The bravest thing I ever did was continuing my life when I wanted to die. Life is pleasant, Death is peaceful, It's the transition that's troublesome. if you take that sniper you'll regret it before you die. Anyways, if you still wanna go ahead, be calm and know that satan awaits you at the door. 2 Likes |
Re: So many have been strong for too long (Picture) by DonEd(m): 11:04pm On Feb 04, 2021 |
Send me an email now. southarc@outlook.com I got a job for u |
Re: So many have been strong for too long (Picture) by UOBEN(m): 11:27pm On Feb 04, 2021 |
Suicide is never the option....many of us here are struggling just like you. but I believe it will only get better...abeg reply that email immediately. 2 Likes |
Re: So many have been strong for too long (Picture) by 3gpvids: 12:19am On Feb 05, 2021 |
I got nothing to say scary |
Re: So many have been strong for too long (Picture) by olanrewaju49127: 6:04am On Feb 05, 2021 |
Send me an email now.southarc@outlook.com I got a job for u |
Re: So many have been strong for too long (Picture) by KingAlayinde(m): 8:08am On Feb 05, 2021 |
troublemakea: can't sugarcoat anything for you bro ,,,, be brave to fight N conquer ur battles cos everyone will surely faces there battles just differently.... thanks God u still have the energy to grind better.... some are handicapped N so helpless more than u are ...... their is light at the end of the tunnel |
Re: So many have been strong for too long (Picture) by Immarocks(f): 10:50am On Feb 05, 2021 |
I have felt this way since the company where I work asked some of us to hold on almost a year now due to corona virus pandemic...after 3yrs am back home nothing to show,mum and dad are beginning to give me the stare.i feel miserable not been able to help financially in the house ... ..I wake up every day with tears in my eyes and thought of ending it all since nothing is working out.there is really no balance this life ....but OP YOU ARE NOT ALONE...IF YOU SUCCOME TO THE DARKNESS INSIDE OF YOU..WHO WILL TAKE CARE OF YOU SICK MUM AND SIBLINGS,HOW WILL THEY FARE.OP,THEY NEED YOU,THEY ARE STRONG BECAUSE YOU ARE ALL TOGETHER.THINK OF THEM DONT BREAK THE SUPPORT CHAIN AS THEY SAY.."WHEN THERE IS LIFE,THERE IS HOPE". |
Re: So many have been strong for too long (Picture) by troublemakea(m): 10:58am On Feb 05, 2021 |
DonEd: olanrewaju49127: DonEd: I just sent a mail. thanks |
Re: So many have been strong for too long (Picture) by troublemakea(m): 10:59am On Feb 05, 2021 |
Immarocks: Thanks for the words of encouragement and May God help us both life is at all not fair to some of us but we Hope to fall on it's good side soonest. |
Re: So many have been strong for too long (Picture) by heendrix(m): 11:35am On Feb 05, 2021 |
UOBEN: DonEd: olanrewaju49127: DonEd: All I see here is 3 in 1. what is you guys plan for the poor guy gan gan Op I'll advice you are suspicious of these three Monika mynd44 lalasticlala justwise RoyalRoy help take thread to FP this guy's destiny helper might be there. help encourage the poor dude from suicide n depression 2 Likes |
Re: So many have been strong for too long (Picture) by DonEd(m): 12:14pm On Feb 05, 2021 |
heendrix: I dont know the other person claiming to use my email. |
Re: So many have been strong for too long (Picture) by LadySarah: 12:21pm On Feb 05, 2021 |
hold on a little more, your morning will come |
Re: So many have been strong for too long (Picture) by Immarocks(f): 12:28pm On Feb 05, 2021 |
troublemakea: glad to know you feel better...how's your mum's health.may God heal her |
Re: So many have been strong for too long (Picture) by frozen70(f): 11:00pm On Feb 05, 2021 |
Just believe in yourself and hold on to God |
Re: So many have been strong for too long (Picture) by samuel19222(m): 11:20pm On Feb 05, 2021 |
Hope say the guy no latter take the sniper? Guy wait small na, 2023 is a stone away. |
Re: So many have been strong for too long (Picture) by troublemakea(m): 7:01pm On Feb 08, 2021 |
Immarocks: she's been a lil better now thanks xoxo much for ur concern immarocks I'm really grateful. I really is tbh 1 Like |
Re: So many have been strong for too long (Picture) by Nobody: 4:42am On Feb 22, 2021 |
Are you still alive, OP? I pray you are well. 1 Like |
Re: So many have been strong for too long (Picture) by culf: 7:33am On Feb 22, 2021 |
If only you know what some people are going through and still hoping. Don't give up bro, just get close to God, with faith and patience, you'll get there. you might be your family saviour or hope for a turnaround soonest, what then happen them when you end your life? May God arrest your spirit and keep you alive |
Re: So many have been strong for too long (Picture) by Mikester: 9:03am On Feb 22, 2021 |
Dont you have friends, relatives, loved ones, religious leaders who can be of help? If you kill yourself, you will always be remembered as a failure by all who hears. Your situation is survivable. Try other approaches and seek help from the right places. 1 Like |
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