Keshinr0:
Am against him coming back
You guys should give him support, help him get his life back.
Tell him to forget about his kids, for now, when they are old enough they will be with him

HRprof:
This matter strong
That is to say British law protect woman, if its here in Nigeria is the other way round. My advise is that Nigeria men should learn how to protect their wife either in Nigeria or abroad to aviod this scenarios.
Anyway lets people who stay in UK give the guy better advice because for we in Nigeria will not give him better advise as Nigeria is lawless even in marriage issue as People do anyhow and get away with it.

seunmsg:
Like I always say, marriage is overrated. It is just an arrangement of convenience that can crash at any time. Men especially should never lose guide while in it. When shit hits like in the case of this man, that’s when you will realize all the “I love you I love” na scam. The other gender will so deal with you without even blinking.

I read somewhere this morning that Jeff Bozos ex-wife has remarried. This lady skimmed Bezos off billions of dollars only to go and marry a teacher who she can control.

Men must take care of their family while not neglecting themselves at the same time. If you live in a country like the UK, start keeping part of your income in Nigeria or any other country where the UK law has not jurisdiction over. Make sure you’ve a fallback plan just in case of marital failure. We all read Ebue’s sad story. We must all be guided.

ASUNDER:
My friend is currently going through a divorce in the UK and having a hell of a time. His wife mounted as many allegations on him as possible during separation - domestic violence, marital rape, child abuse, drugs and alcohol use, adultery, forgery just to name a few. He had to leave the house. He has moved to a room in a shared house and now even struggling to pay the rent. He does not see his kids anymore (not by choice). He is very broke and in debt because of all that is going on. He can no longer afford a lawyer. He feels so powerless, helpless and hopeless that he cannot fight most of what his wife is putting him through in court. He represents himself these days.

He has stopped looking after himself and is always looking sad . He also lost his job due to his arrest and all the drama. He was arrested because he tried to go see his kids at his former home and his wife called the police that she was afraid of him and that he had come to harass her. Police arrested him even without any traces of any harassment. Note that he moved out of the family house voluntarily thinking that the period of separation would ease tension between him and his wife.

I always feel sad seeing him in this state and just wish that he could recover and bounce back. He is considering moving back to Nigeria.

Have you gone through divorce in the UK or do you know anyone who has? What was the experience and what advice would you give someone going through this?

Thank you.

Tats:


There is really not much he can do about it. The law favours the woman especially if they have kids. My white neighbour and his wife who are a relatively young couple have two children and when they had marital disagreement, he was the one that had to move out of the house. Luckily for him, his parents do not live far away so he moved to their house. He has a job so can at least fend for himself. Many Nigerian men are in the same boat as this man and are really struggling and that's why there are so many single and divorced older men here. He may even be the one still paying for the mortgage in the house that he is not living in and the lady could bring another man to the house to stay. He should focus on himself, but if he doesn't have a good job, then his life will be one of continuous struggle as he will not be able to get a new mortgage and will be living from hand to mouth or will be depending on the Government for pittance. To be honest, it is a difficult decision but if he thinks there is really no hope, maybe he should return to Nigeria and try to make something out for himself. His children will look for him when they are older. If he remains here he would need to work really hard to turnaround his situation.

lekki1444:
who is ebue

lekki1444:
who is ebue

SweetCunt97:
Atleast una don tick register. But didnt you marry yr friend? What could have happened?

ASUNDER:
My friend is currently going through a divorce in the UK and having a hell of a time. His wife mounted as many allegations on him as possible during separation - domestic violence, marital rape, child abuse, drugs and alcohol use, adultery, forgery just to name a few. He had to leave the house. He has moved to a room in a shared house and now even struggling to pay the rent. He does not see his kids anymore (not by choice). He is very broke and in debt because of all that is going on. He can no longer afford a lawyer. He feels so powerless, helpless and hopeless that he cannot fight most of what his wife is putting him through in court. He represents himself these days.

He has stopped looking after himself and is always looking sad . He also lost his job due to his arrest and all the drama. He was arrested because he tried to go see his kids at his former home and his wife called the police that she was afraid of him and that he had come to harass her. Police arrested him even without any traces of any harassment. Note that he moved out of the family house voluntarily thinking that the period of separation would ease tension between him and his wife.

I always feel sad seeing him in this state and just wish that he could recover and bounce back. He is considering moving back to Nigeria.

Have you gone through divorce in the UK or do you know anyone who has? What was the experience and what advice would you give someone going through this?

Thank you.

seunmsg:


Former Arsenal defender.

gambia:


He was a former Arsenal defender.

https://www.vanguardngr.com/2017/12/emmanuel-eboue-loses-life-savings-properties-wife-following-bitter-divorce/

Keshinr0:
Am against him coming back
You guys should give him support, help him get his life back.
Tell him to forget about his kids, for now, when they are old enough they will be with him him

Michelle55:
How do people who vows to take the forever steps together suddenly turns against each other overnight? Just how?

OnlyDeCapPlease:



Every man's worst nightmare in the UK. He should try these guys. He has nothing to lose.

https://www.fathers-4-justice.org/contact-us/

If somehow he can raise money, these guys specialise in cases for men

https://cordellcordell.co.uk/

Tats:


Unfortunately, he cannot relocate to another country apart from Nigeria except he is a citizen there. Relocation is not an easy thing as you would have to start from scratch and you will not have any credit record and that is not easy. Anything you want to apply for, they will do a credit check and if you are new and don't have a record, they are likely to deny you.

LesbianBoy:
When will warn you guys to be careful of women and don't be deceived by their pretty faces or innocent looks (that is for those that has it o) una no go hear.

Una go accuse person of being pained or a woman hater now look at.

Your friend should enjoy all his wife is giving him jare and stop disturbing us

Lekmanz87:


Coming to nigeria is not a good idea for me when a man falls 7times he must get up 8times...man up and get your shits together coz when there’s life there’s still hope...#Shiloh

Henvest:
"Marital rape, drugs, child abuse, adultery .....e.t.c"
Just a case of giving a dog name to kill it.
I wonder why we black man still don't understand that marriage , divorce or marital law.. I don't know the Bleep they call it...is just one of many tools and system put in place to keep black men down, in this case using their wife.
The same way they use media , religion, culture , politics e.t.c is the same way they are using women in marriage to bring and keep men down.

Meanwhile it has been proven that women, mostly Nigeria women are like Lion cub .
No matter how lovely and cute they look at young age once they become independent they turn into a monster.
And u will surely be their first victim after U have help them grow.
If you must train them make sure u trim their jaws and finger from time to time.
Lastly never allow society to push you into taking your wife abroad to live with you in order to be a real man..
The story has never end well unless God is on your side.
All the systems they interact with there are design to brainwash them into being a willing tool for your down fall

Ketapu:


He should join "Men Going Their Own Way" (MGTOW) subreddit on reddit.com. He will find men undergoing such situations or who have undergone such situations before. They will advise him and help him through that phase.

I'll also advice he starts reading books on self improvement. "No more mr nice guy" is a good starting point. He can download the book on b-ok.org

I encourage every guy out there to read the book titled "How to destroy a man now." In that short book, you will read unimaginable ways a woman can destroy you as a man. Marriage or relationship with the female is a dangerous game or time bomb. Only God can save we men in the hands of those devil incarnate.

Sincerely, any woman can destroy a man when she wants. This is what your family man is undergoing now. I wish him the strength to undergo and overcome this phase of his life.

lekki1444:
Ahhh thanks for the article bro

RisenPhoenix1:
His mistake was not seeing the signs early enough. If you insist on keeping your wife and family with you in the UK, you need to take financial precautions; like keeping the bulk of your savings in offshore accounts that she is not aware of, including her name on the mortgage papers and getting your kids acclimatized to staying with your parents in Nigeria. So as soon as you see signs of her misbehaviour, you pack up and leave her hanging. The court cannot award her what they can't find. Well, too late now.

Tell him to suspend the search for a job until the court case is all wrapped up. There's very little she can gain from him now; the court cannot order a jobless man to either pay alimony or child support. After that, he can relocate to another town, pick up the pieces and try to get visitation rights. Over time, it will resolve itself.

ibuildstuff:

U will be surprise that the woman is a Nigerian. Something like this happened to my uncle, a woman he came to Nigeria to marry did this to him.

eduson33:
If your friend is truly innocent then here is my 2 cent.

Divorce can be messy and mostly favors the woman.
FOR ME I'D SAY,HE SHOULD FIND A WAY TO MAKE PEACE...THERE IS ALWAYS A SOLUTION TO EVERY PROBLEM.

That being said;

1. He needs to get something doing. Even tho its very tough right now, he can find some part time job to keep him afloat.(Tell him to search for property management companies(concierge and security) they only need your cv and your availability to start booking you in for jobs or he can apply for public fund.

Even tho his current visa says''no recourse to public funds,he can still access public funds but it will only restart the clock for him and extend the length of time before he can Naturalize or receive ILR. He can also be provided with a lawyer if he cant afford one(Even tho those ones are not the best). Some legal firms will be happy to take on the case and charge him later if successful(depending on his argument)..He should start gathering proofs and evidences that will help his case.

if they have been married for over 3 years and he has lived in the UK for at least one year, he is entitled to apply for ''RIGHT TO REMAIN'' Which means he will be issued a 5 years visa to remain in the UK after the divorce,provided that the application is successful.

If the court grants him access to the kids, he can also apply to remain in the country based on the kids.

Tell him to actively pursue peace..katakata is never a solution..

That’s a brilliant piece of advice.
Hopefully he’ll read it and gain strength and encouragement.

xandy84:
Op is leaving some important information. Nobody arrest you for going to your house except you have restraining order against you. Don't make it look like men don't have right in UK, US bro. Allegations without proof holds no ground in sane climate. If his wife accuse him of marital rape, abuse and forgery, she will have to prove beyond reasonable doubt such activities happened. OP it's either omitting or does not have a full story.. Talking from experience

lekki1444:
what happened to him ?

Michelle55:

Yeah.. Please do enlighten me

babythug:
Divorce is an unfortunate situation to be in. Nonetheless it’s not the end of the world . Both himself and his former wife are to blame . He should brace up and try the following:

1. Dust himself and be ready to start over .
2. Face his career or job
3. Determine to be at peace with his ex no matter the level of provocation or otherwise
4. Be the best father he can be to his children given the circumstances. Pay whatever bills as deemed necessary and pay extra where possible
5. He should document any payment made
6. He must not bring the kids into the divorce by relaying what their mum has done or not done to them
7.