| Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by Judybash93(m): 3:25pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
pappilo:
Yes. Met in Uni, came to the UK together I'm really sorry sir. I wish you go through this successfully. |
| Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by baralatie(m): 3:26pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
Kelvin3476:
AS A GUY WEY U BE EHN, MAKE U NO EVER BRING A WOMAN TO ABROAD NOR MATTER HOW U TRUSTED HIM. it makes no difference wether the woman is following you up and down or is seperate. if the relationship between the two of una degenerates it is either you pray for a miracle(which happens) or you seperate peacefully (which also happens) |
| Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by bouncin04(m): 3:27pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
LongNipple:
My Uncle in United States just came out of a Divorce. It's was TERRIBLE. And I mean Terrible!!!
His wife filed for a Divorce stating she is tired of the marriage and she wants him to be paying her Child Support. The Court took his House, His Cars. Sold the house and gave 80% of the money to the wife.
During that period, he lost his job as well. He almost went into Depression. He wasn't seeing his Child cos the court ordered the wife to take the child becos she is underaged.
He was back to square one.
We kept on encouraging him during that period. He managed to get a Car on hire through someone and was using it for UBER. Tried applying to work a Hospital (according to them, they say thats where money is at least) but was unsuccessful cos he is not a Medical personnel.
He slept on the streets. In his car. In people's stair cases. Kept his remains property in a place where he pays weekly for its safety.
The large chunk of his properties such as TV, Fridge and other, the court asked them to sell and share the money equally. The wife then demanded for CHILD SUPPORT. He started paying for Child Support with UBER work. Come and see suffer. Any money that enters his account will be wired to his Ex-Wife.
It got to a time his female lawyer started using style to side his ex-wife and her lawyers during round table court hearings cos she's is also a divorcee.
Life was hard for him mehn.
He started falling sick everyday. Sometimes he would call us and want to start crying. I felt for him but there was a limit to what I could do.
But like they say, it's only GOD that has the final say. We started doing prayers for him here in Nigeria. After some months, He got a job at a Hospital. He started collected small money. He got a small Apartment. Paid for the Car he used for UBER. Things started taking a new turn.
Right now, the 20% proceeds from the sale of his house has just been released to him after 2 years and he has bought himself a decent house. He still pays for children support with the money he gets from his hospital work.
He came back to Nigeria and he has remarried. The wife would be joining him over there soon.
He is about to tell the Lawyers to release his daughter to him cos he now has a female figure who can take care of her and her wants his daughter to be with him as the father.
He is happy Now. No more sicknesses like before. When the ex wife saw that he is now progressing. She started using style to come back to him shamelessly but he told her to keep off.
It's only a matter of time. God will always stand up for his own. We just need to be strong and have faith in him for every negative thing we are passing through right now will one day become a story we all will look back at and be glad we never gave up.
So after everything he went through , the muderfucker still came back and re-married , to make matters worse she wld be joining him soon ? Some men will never learn sha . Breakup with a girlfriend alone , pain I felt that period was excruciating , not to talk of wife . All the muscles I used years to build deflated in no time, I grew frail within minutes , I don swallow red pill , I no want anything emotional to do with a woman again , na just to find one girl give belle , toto sweet but if you check am las las na ur body the enjoyment dey , real men in the house will understand. Women are very self centred beings and it's time men start being self centred too. Simps will come quote me to call me a loser , but it's okay . 24 Likes 
|
| Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by Judybash93(m): 3:28pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
lekki1444:
who is ebue A former Ivorian footballer who went through hell cos of his messy divorce. He lost almost everything 2 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by Yankee101: 3:29pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
Don't take any woman outside the country you don't trust unless she has much much more money than yourself. That's the only way a divorce or child support will favour you
It keeps happening again and again ad nauseum
Men make una learn. At least marry someone from there 2 Likes |
| Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by baralatie(m): 3:30pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
LongNipple:
My Uncle in United States just came out of a Divorce. It's was TERRIBLE. And I mean Terrible!!!
His wife filed for a Divorce stating she is tired of the marriage and she wants him to be paying her Child Support. The Court took his House, His Cars. Sold the house and gave 80% of the money to the wife.
During that period, he lost his job as well. He almost went into Depression. He wasn't seeing his Child cos the court ordered the wife to take the child becos she is underaged.
He was back to square one.
We kept on encouraging him during that period. He managed to get a Car on hire through someone and was using it for UBER. Tried applying to work a Hospital (according to them, they say thats where money is at least) but was unsuccessful cos he is not a Medical personnel.
He slept on the streets. In his car. In people's stair cases. Kept his remains property in a place where he pays weekly for its safety.
The large chunk of his properties such as TV, Fridge and other, the court asked them to sell and share the money equally. The wife then demanded for CHILD SUPPORT. He started paying for Child Support with UBER work. Come and see suffer. Any money that enters his account will be wired to his Ex-Wife.
It got to a time his female lawyer started using style to side his ex-wife and her lawyers during round table court hearings cos she's is also a divorcee.
Life was hard for him mehn.
He started falling sick everyday. Sometimes he would call us and want to start crying. I felt for him but there was a limit to what I could do.
But like they say, it's only GOD that has the final say. We started doing prayers for him here in Nigeria. After some months, He got a job at a Hospital. He started collected small money. He got a small Apartment. Paid for the Car he used for UBER. Things started taking a new turn.
Right now, the 20% proceeds from the sale of his house has just been released to him after 2 years and he has bought himself a decent house. He still pays for children support with the money he gets from his hospital work.
He came back to Nigeria and he has remarried. The wife would be joining him over there soon.
He is about to tell the Lawyers to release his daughter to him cos he now has a female figure who can take care of her and her wants his daughter to be with him as the father.
He is happy Now. No more sicknesses like before. When the ex wife saw that he is now progressing. She started using style to come back to him shamelessly but he told her to keep off.
It's only a matter of time. God will always stand up for his own. We just need to be strong and have faith in him for every negative thing we are passing through right now will one day become a story we all will look back at and be glad we never gave up.
that is the story about having the audacity to go against the odds. God answers prayers |
| Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by addictiv(m): 3:31pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
1. That's why it's important to have cctv and hidden cameras in your houses, you never know when you might need evidence.
2. If my wife starts insulting or disrespecting me abroad or calls the police on me esp after we have had kids and I have a foreign passport. I will jejely pack my load and move back to Nigeria. Kids can stay with her.
3.Guys should always have some investment in Nigeria especially after they have stabilised abroad. You never know when you might need it.
4. It's important that the woman works and earns abroad. Don't make her stay at home while you foot all the bills even if you earn more than enough.
5. Please don't move out of ur house unless asked by a court or police. No matter what, move into another room but stay in your house.
6. All bills should be shared including mortgage, fees etc , use a joint account to pay bills if you need to but share bills. 7 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by pappilo(m): 3:32pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
xandy84:
Please don't tell me what you don't know nothing about. I live in the States, going thru a divorce at the moment. Like I said earlier, thw OP is not telling full story. NOBODY arrest you for visiting your house except there is a restraining order against you and you don't get locked up for forgery allegation except there is a proof.
You are the one chatting dust. Arrest is an investigatory tool. Hundreds of thousands of innocent people are arrested every year. If I cut myself with a blade and call the police and tell them ABC stabbed me, the police will arrest ABC for "a prompt and effective investigation" (PACE code G). They arrest not because you are guilty but to aid their investigation i.e interview you, take DNA and biometric samples, seize evidence. As a precaution they will release you on bail while they continue your their investigation and a condition of the bail will be to not go near the victim. Women know this and thats why they make up all kinds of claims. Although not all allegations are false. 17 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by asorodayo1: 3:32pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
[My brother in Man City also facing the same challenges. I don't even follow their trend again to know how far they have gone to. May God help them we have our own disaster here too...quote author=ASUNDER post=99685442]My friend is currently going through a divorce in the UK and having a hell of a time. His wife mounted as many allegations on him as possible during separation - domestic violence, marital rape, child abuse, drugs and alcohol use, adultery, forgery just to name a few. He had to leave the house. He has moved to a room in a shared house and now even struggling to pay the rent. He does not see his kids anymore (not by choice). He is very broke and in debt because of all that is going on. He can no longer afford a lawyer. He feels so powerless, helpless and hopeless that he cannot fight most of what his wife is putting him through in court. He represents himself these days.
He has stopped looking after himself and is always looking sad . He also lost his job due to his arrest and all the drama. He was arrested because he tried to go see his kids at his former home and his wife called the police that she was afraid of him and that he had come to harass her. Police arrested him even without any traces of any harassment. Note that he moved out of the family house voluntarily thinking that the period of separation would ease tension between him and his wife.
I always feel sad seeing him in this state and just wish that he could recover and bounce back. He is considering moving back to Nigeria.
Have you gone through divorce in the UK or do you know anyone who has? What was the experience and what advice would you give someone going through this?
Thank you.[/quote] |
| Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by Splitmind: 3:33pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
SURElee:
You mentioned domestic violence as one of the many allegations against your friend.
Now, if he wasn't violent towards his wife, he wouldn't have been arrested or She wouldn't have been scared when he came to see his kids. It was the fear of a possible violent altercation that led her to calling to police.
Nigerian men have to know that what they do to women in Naija here and get applauded, they will get the boot for it over there.
I won't comment further , because you are simply giving a one sided report of what you have heard the man say. You haven't heard the wife's side of the story.
It takes two to make marriage work.
Your friend should sit and truthfully analyse what went wrong and take steps to better his life. It is either they make up or go separate ways in which he is healthy, mentally and emotionally stable even after the divorce.
He need to stay alive and be stable upstairs , he wouldn't be the first in this case. In most scenarios of domestic violence regardless of who is at fault the man is usually arrested and blamed for it. Just like the Amber Heard case women can lie and people will believe them simply because they are women, when the truth comes out and the man is finished there is no respite for him because his character had already been assassinated. 4 Likes |
| Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by seunak2016: 3:34pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
@op tell your friend to be prayerful, he should find a pastor here in Nigeria here who will be praying for him and God will definitely fight the battle for him. |
| Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by baralatie(m): 3:36pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
SURElee:
You mentioned domestic violence as one of the many allegations against your friend.
Now, if he wasn't violent towards his wife, he wouldn't have been arrested or She wouldn't have been scared when he came to see his kids. It was the fear of a possible violent altercation that led her to calling to police.
Nigerian men have to know that what they do to women in Naija here and get applauded, they will get the boot for it over there.
I won't comment further , because you are simply giving a one sided report of what you have heard the man say. You haven't heard the wife's side of the story.
It takes two to make marriage work.
Your friend should sit and truthfully analyse what went wrong and take steps to better his life. It is either they make up or go separate ways in which he is healthy, mentally and emotionally stable even after the divorce.
He need to stay alive and be stable upstairs , he wouldn't be the first in this case. abroad marriage na prayer and fasting if these women lie for ya head say this man gbi gba gbo.... you go shock...police don arrange you sharpaly (blackky for that matter) |
| Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by Nobody: 3:43pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
famzynet:
How does one including wife's name in mortgage papers benefit the man in case of divorce? Please enlighten us. By making her a co-signatory she legally becomes equally liable for the debt. The man in this case can always file for bankruptcy and she goes it all alone; which is only fair considering that she's getting the house awarded to her in the end. Of course, he will lose all his earlier payments, but at least he won't have to make any future payments on the house, while she's living in it with her next victim. My friend who's a financial planner secretly supports this, though to his friends, not openly in front of his clients. But in this case it's too late, she'll never agree. He can still default and let them repossess though. Here's a case study from the UK. http://thebankruptcyservice.co.uk/bankruptcy-and-joint-mortgagesThe bottom line is; and I can never stress this enough; leave your family back home if you want to go hustle for money in the US or Europe. Come back when you've made a little capital and invest in Nigeria. Carrying your family abroad is not for the legally or financially uneducated. 4 Likes |
| Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by sarutobi: 3:44pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
grafixdon:
My brother had the same issue with his wife some years ago... Unfortunately for him he was deported back to Nigeria without a penny after many years in uk. Meanwhile, he was the one who took his wife to the uk.
After he was reported, she doesn't even allow him to speak with his kids (2girls) on phone. He later suffers depression, always on drugs, he couldn't work or do anything meaningful, totally useless... Today, the guy is in rehab in Yaba, he's shadow of himself as I speak...
My chairman, do you remember me? I still got your laptop ooo.  |
| Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by xandy84: 3:44pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
You can make you opinion known without being subtle insult. I believe you can do better. I will not be exchanging either fact, opinion or argument with you Sir cos it can only end one way, more insult. Have a good one out there pappilo:
You are the one chatting dust. Arrest is an investigatory tool. Hundreds of thousands of innocent people are arrested every year. If I cut myself with a blade and call the police and tell them ABC stabbed me, the police will arrest ABC for "a prompt and effective investigation" (PACE code G).
They arrest not because you are guilty but to aid their investigation i.e interview you, take DNA and biometric samples, seize evidence. As a precaution they will release you on bail while they continue your their investigation and a condition of the bail will be to not go near the victim.
Women know this and thats why they make up all kinds of claims. Although not all allegations are false. |
| Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by Nobody: 3:46pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
ednut1:
Best to move back. Marriage gets scary every day. Nawa Don't come back Mr. Man, u just lost ur life cos of a woman and u re running with ur tails behind, Fight ur divorce case and stay in the UK and build up again, if u come back to Nigeria u have failed ur future self! Europe is the worst place to marry a woman, mostly Britain goosh! Divorce is a business among women there, the best thing people should do is to sign an agreement, or falsely declare their assets |
| Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by lastchild: 3:46pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
first of all, the wife is from where? |
| Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by cooltola(m): 3:46pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
Sometimes in a moment of like this, It is also good to beg on your knees and pray to God and ask God for advice. When the odds are against you, it is best to pray and trust in God. Psalm 34:18, “The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit.” Tell your friend not to give up fighting to see his children Tell him to keep surviving and managing Tell your friend to apply for parental rights for his children and let the court hear his sides. https://www.gov.uk/parental-rights-responsibilities/apply-for-parental-responsibility 2 Likes |
| Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by IjeBos(m): 3:48pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
koxi:
My dear I understand.
Advice your friend to seek for government/public sponsored attorneys...they have them there as they do here in the US. They will help him fight his case.
The major setback is that the system is designed to favor the woman/wife but in some cases the man/husband can be successful.
But here’s the CAVEAT:
If your friend, at any point whatsoever, has physically abused the wife or kids and there’s proof, tell him to RUN AS FAR AWAY AS POSSIBLE.
They will nail his a*ss! For good!!
Because there are always two sides to every story, he should tread carefully.
Wish him all the best... This. I feel there is more to this story. Has he been physical with her? Is there any veracity to any of her claims? Granted, men and woman can be evil. But generally, in these Nigerian relationships, it's generally the men who haven't "let go" of the idea that they are no longer in Nigeria. Or marry women who are younger and bring them abroad without any thought as to what happens when they are now financially independent and exposed to western thought. This should be a cautionary tale to all men who live or want to live in the West. The courts are equal or tend to favor women. Again, this is not Nigeria, the physical, verbal abuse and need to dominate, won't last. The society favors equality and in divorce, woman can get half of everything and the courts can force you to pay her marital and child support. So, when they are fed up.. they have options. But, there is so much to know before getting any advice. Are these just civil procedures or are they criminal as well(mean can he go to jail). Does he still want to be married? What does she want from him? Did she get a restraining order on him before his attempt to visit the kids? You should ask him to be 100% honest with you in order to get good wisdom. If there is a hint at reconciliation(if she is open to it), he should try to find a good church who may offer marriage counseling if he can't afford private marriage counseling. That road would be long and they both have to be open to honesty, growth and change or be able to fake it. Else he should just move on mentally. Do not attempt to contact her and do not go over the house to "see the children". Ask the courts to set up times that he can visit the kids and if he needs to talk to her do so through and attorney. A move to Nigeria sounds drastic. But, it isn't a terrible idea if he can find a good opportunity, but would he be comfortable leaving his kids? Time heals all and he will get better. He just needs to be honest so he can get good wisdom and not make it worse. I just thought about it. Does, he want to move to Nigeria because he is scared of going to jail in the UK? 3 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by Nobody: 3:50pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
Keshinr0:
Am against him coming back
You guys should give him support, help him get his life back.
Tell him to forget about his kids, for now, when they are old enough they will be with him him Leave that other idiot up there saying he should move back t nigeria, I'm sure is a woman using male moniker! He needs all the support he can get, but I thought in divorce cases the state provide a lawye/state prosecutor 4 people that for one rsn or another don't have one! 2 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by ggood: 3:51pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
Tats:
There is really not much he can do about it. The law favours the woman especially if they have kids. My white neighbour and his wife who are a relatively young couple have two children and when they had marital disagreement, he was the one that had to move out of the house. Luckily for him, his parents do not live far away so he moved to their house. He has a job so can at least fend for himself. Many Nigerian men are in the same boat as this man and are really struggling and that's why there are so many single and divorced older men here. He may even be the one still paying for the mortgage in the house that he is not living in and the lady could bring another man to the house to stay. He should focus on himself, but if he doesn't have a good job, then his life will be one of continuous struggle as he will not be able to get a new mortgage and will be living from hand to mouth or will be depending on the Government for pittance. To be honest, it is a difficult decision but if he thinks there is really no hope, maybe he should return to Nigeria and try to make something out for himself. His children will look for him when they are older. If he remains here he would need to work really hard to turnaround his situation. Brother how can he be paying for the mortgage of the house while the lady bring in new lover that is barbaric , Thanks for our law in Nigeria 2 Likes |
| Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by Nobody: 3:54pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
Tats:
There is really not much he can do about it. The law favours the woman especially if they have kids. My white neighbour and his wife who are a relatively young couple have two children and when they had marital disagreement, he was the one that had to move out of the house. Luckily for him, his parents do not live far away so he moved to their house. He has a job so can at least fend for himself. Many Nigerian men are in the same boat as this man and are really struggling and that's why there are so many single and divorced older men here. He may even be the one still paying for the mortgage in the house that he is not living in and the lady could bring another man to the house to stay. He should focus on himself, but if he doesn't have a good job, then his life will be one of continuous struggle as he will not be able to get a new mortgage and will be living from hand to mouth or will be depending on the Government for pittance. To be honest, it is a difficult decision but if he thinks there is really no hope, maybe he should return to Nigeria and try to make something out for himself. His children will look for him when they are older. If he remains here he would need to work really hard to turnaround his situation. UK is that bad when it comes to divorce laws, I can never live as a married man in the UK how can I just live my house I built with my sweat for a woman that I married as a wife that came to the house with only one Ghana must go bag!!? What the hell!!!!! If is like this, I'm coming to London to live only as a single person and for vacation! 1 Like |
| Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by Nobody: 3:55pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
babythug:
Divorce is an unfortunate situation to be in. Nonetheless it’s not the end of the world . Both himself and his former wife are to blame . He should brace up and try the following:
1. Dust himself and be ready to start over .
2. Face his career or job
3. Determine to be at peace with his ex no matter the level of provocation or otherwise
4. Be the best father he can be to his children given the circumstances. Pay whatever bills as deemed necessary and pay extra where possible
5. He should document any payment made
6. He must not bring the kids into the divorce by relaying what their mum has done or not done to them
7. Really! Think for a moment, if u were to switch positions, will u be giving this same advice, hypocrite!? 3 Likes |
| Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by Nobody: 3:59pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
[/b]baddosky1 : Love a Nigerian lady= [b]Big Mistake Marry a Nigerian Lady= Bigger MistakeMarry a Nigerian Lady and relocate abroad with her = Biggest and worst mistake that will eventually kill youMarry a woman in Europe aka feminist= suicide 4 Likes |
| Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by IjeBos(m): 4:04pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
LongNipple:
My Uncle in United States just came out of a Divorce. It's was TERRIBLE. And I mean Terrible!!!
His wife filed for a Divorce stating she is tired of the marriage and she wants him to be paying her Child Support. The Court took his House, His Cars. Sold the house and gave 80% of the money to the wife.
During that period, he lost his job as well. He almost went into Depression. He wasn't seeing his Child cos the court ordered the wife to take the child becos she is underaged.
He was back to square one.
We kept on encouraging him during that period. He managed to get a Car on hire through someone and was using it for UBER. Tried applying to work a Hospital (according to them, they say thats where money is at least) but was unsuccessful cos he is not a Medical personnel.
He slept on the streets. In his car. In people's stair cases. Kept his remains property in a place where he pays weekly for its safety.
The large chunk of his properties such as TV, Fridge and other, the court asked them to sell and share the money equally. The wife then demanded for CHILD SUPPORT. He started paying for Child Support with UBER work. Come and see suffer. Any money that enters his account will be wired to his Ex-Wife.
It got to a time his female lawyer started using style to side his ex-wife and her lawyers during round table court hearings cos she's is also a divorcee.
Life was hard for him mehn.
He started falling sick everyday. Sometimes he would call us and want to start crying. I felt for him but there was a limit to what I could do.
But like they say, it's only GOD that has the final say. We started doing prayers for him here in Nigeria. After some months, He got a job at a Hospital. He started collected small money. He got a small Apartment. Paid for the Car he used for UBER. Things started taking a new turn.
Right now, the 20% proceeds from the sale of his house has just been released to him after 2 years and he has bought himself a decent house. He still pays for children support with the money he gets from his hospital work.
He came back to Nigeria and he has remarried. The wife would be joining him over there soon.
He is about to tell the Lawyers to release his daughter to him cos he now has a female figure who can take care of her and her wants his daughter to be with him as the father.
He is happy Now. No more sicknesses like before. When the ex wife saw that he is now progressing. She started using style to come back to him shamelessly but he told her to keep off.
It's only a matter of time. God will always stand up for his own. We just need to be strong and have faith in him for every negative thing we are passing through right now will one day become a story we all will look back at and be glad we never gave up.
This story.... He came to Nigeria to remarry who? Some woman he just met who has never lived in the US? Jesus. He just got out of it and he's laying the foundation to go through it again. Some people never learn. 13 Likes |
| Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by seunmsg(m): 4:04pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
pappilo:
I am going through the same and at some point in the story I thought it was about me
Probably too late now but if possible, beg, grovel, apologise, send emissaries for what you did and didnt do but be sure not to implicate yourself. I say this because you can never win. In my experience, begging didnt work but it is prudent to try.
Another thing for any man who finds himself in a toxic marriage is to know when to give up on the marriage and move strategically. I held on too long not really for love but for the sake of my children but remember the children will survive if you are there or not.
I left the house a few times thinking things will get better but it didnt help. It emboldened my ex wife and she started to invite her boyfriend into our family home when I wasnt there. Her boyfriend moved into our home only about 3 weeks after I was arrested and told by the police not to return to the house. And I still part paid the mortgage for almost a year until I transferred my interest in it over to her.
I moved to a garage conversion in a shared house. The garage obviously had no insulation so cold almost killed me in winter. Used to sleep with full tracksuit, electric blanket and heater. I have moved to my own flat now.
I caught a few charges from her and her boyfriend and I am on trial in crown court next month. They are serious charges but I am optimistic that even if found guilty there will be no jail time as I am of good character. I am kind of prepared for the worst though so although not concrete my plan B will be to relocate to Nigeria if I do get prison time as I will lose my job and the prospects wont be good on release.
I have been working a second job and doing 75hrs a week for about 11 months and this has helped me pay part of my criminal defence fees which are just a little under £15,000. But even with that I am over £10,000 in debt.
I was mad suicidal for a long time and always feeling sorry for myself but I had to pick myself up. Doing 2 jobs helped to keep me occupied so it must be tough for your friend if he is not busy doing something and keeps thinking.
Thankfully my divorce went as smoothly as possible as she didnt object to it and it was granted just over a year after I was banished from the house. It could have even happened earlier if I didnt develop cold feet a few times.
The part in bold is a very important point all men must realize. I pray things work out fine for you at the end of it all. Thanks for sharing your story, it will help others to learn as well. 2 Likes |
| Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by Nobody: 4:05pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
Sonnobax15:
After reading this story,I don decide say na to manage our Nigerian women no matter how useless they are nai sure pass..
Honestly,the kind of divorce stories we hear about the west will make you wonder if marriage was really meant for both man and woman or for women alone..
A time will come when women from the west will end up marrying themselves because there won't be any man who'd wanna be a victim of their manipulation....
Na dat time e go be like "Africa na blessing in disguise for us wey be the no nonsense men The reason women don't divorce men like that here in Nigeria is because the marital laws are still much on protecting the men a little, the moment this marital laws changes to be what u see in Europe, there would be full blown divorce rates in Nigeria, that judges would have more divorce cases to handle than criminal cases, that's the only reason ur wife hasn't divorced u since, is not because she loves u, is because she has to be sure that when she divorces u, she doesn't lose out, cos the marital laws here are still not gynocentric, Yes I said it!! Infact Nigerian girls own divorce would be so annoying and toxic that u would feel like murdering her in cold blood! 9 Likes |
| Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by Korllami007: 4:06pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
LongNipple:
My Uncle in United States just came out of a Divorce. It's was TERRIBLE. And I mean Terrible!!!
His wife filed for a Divorce stating she is tired of the marriage and she wants him to be paying her Child Support. The Court took his House, His Cars. Sold the house and gave 80% of the money to the wife.
During that period, he lost his job as well. He almost went into Depression. He wasn't seeing his Child cos the court ordered the wife to take the child becos she is underaged.
He was back to square one.
We kept on encouraging him during that period. He managed to get a Car on hire through someone and was using it for UBER. Tried applying to work a Hospital (according to them, they say thats where money is at least) but was unsuccessful cos he is not a Medical personnel.
He slept on the streets. In his car. In people's stair cases. Kept his remains property in a place where he pays weekly for its safety.
The large chunk of his properties such as TV, Fridge and other, the court asked them to sell and share the money equally. The wife then demanded for CHILD SUPPORT. He started paying for Child Support with UBER work. Come and see suffer. Any money that enters his account will be wired to his Ex-Wife.
It got to a time his female lawyer started using style to side his ex-wife and her lawyers during round table court hearings cos she's is also a divorcee.
Life was hard for him mehn.
He started falling sick everyday. Sometimes he would call us and want to start crying. I felt for him but there was a limit to what I could do.
But like they say, it's only GOD that has the final say. We started doing prayers for him here in Nigeria. After some months, He got a job at a Hospital. He started collected small money. He got a small Apartment. Paid for the Car he used for UBER. Things started taking a new turn.
Right now, the 20% proceeds from the sale of his house has just been released to him after 2 years and he has bought himself a decent house. He still pays for children support with the money he gets from his hospital work.
He came back to Nigeria and he has remarried. The wife would be joining him over there soon.
He is about to tell the Lawyers to release his daughter to him cos he now has a female figure who can take care of her and her wants his daughter to be with him as the father.
He is happy Now. No more sicknesses like before. When the ex wife saw that he is now progressing. She started using style to come back to him shamelessly but he told her to keep off.
It's only a matter of time. God will always stand up for his own. We just need to be strong and have faith in him for every negative thing we are passing through right now will one day become a story we all will look back at and be glad we never gave up.
"The wife would be joining him over there soon."
18 Likes 
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| Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by Nobody: 4:09pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
[quote author=LesbianBoy post=99708809]Meanwhile that you friend must be a 'real man'. Na dem dey suffer pass for woman hand [/quoted] I've been scared of marrying women for a long time now, this news just keeps making it more likely that I won't, 1 Like |
| Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by ensamy(m): 4:10pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
He should come back and collect otumokpo to fight the battle for him against the UK Government. One in his pocket and one in his mouth, any thing he says in Court will be final. Try and believe. |
| Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by ednut1(m): 4:11pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
Heathrow44:
Don't come back Mr. Man, u just lost ur life cos of a woman and u re running with ur tails behind, Fight ur divorce case and stay in the UK and build up again, if u come back to Nigeria u have failed ur future self! Europe is the worst place to marry a woman, mostly Britain goosh! Divorce is a business among women there, the best thing people should do is to sign an agreement, or falsely declare their assets he go Dey pay child support and spousal support plus his own bills. Na doom be that already |
| Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by Nobody: 4:12pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
Heathrow44:
Leave that other idiot up there saying he should move back t nigeria, I'm sure is a woman using male moniker! He needs all the support he can get, but I thought in divorce cases the state provide a lawye/state prosecutor 4 people that for one rsn or another don't have one! Am more certain about US, they do provide prosecutors for those who can't afford one. But UK I don't know |
