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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Travel / How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? (65676 Views)
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Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by Nobody: 4:13pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
Michelle55: U don't know how this women in Europe brag about how much they got as alimony after divorcing their husbands, is a business there and a source of wealth 4 Likes |
Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by RALPHOW(m): 4:13pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
Tell him to put himself together and remarry a nice/rich/working single mother lady in the UK. Were lama fi nwo were. Once he remarried , his new marriage / new responsibilities will be considered in the judgement. His wife will calm down once she knows she has lost out to another woman. Single mother knows what she suffered before, she will do everything to support and retain your friend. 1 Like |
Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by grafixdon: 4:21pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
sarutobi: LOL. Which of the laptop? The screen touch or the core i5? |
Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by omoharry(f): 4:22pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
grafixdon:Deported ke!! He must have done something very bad .We know about men losing everything as a result of divorce but I don't know about deportation except he must have done something unlawfully . 2 Likes |
Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by sarutobi: 4:24pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
grafixdon: cant remember bro. I think corei5. That was long time a go. |
Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by bull67: 4:29pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
it has happened to me b4, he should just go and shag another and make his feelings go. if not he can die of depression which can bring in stroke 1 Like |
Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by Nobody: 4:30pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
LongNipple: This ur friend is the cause of his misfortune in life, I mean after all he went thru he still went ahead and brought anyoda girl t the US, after he will say is village people that's doing him, idiot! 15 Likes 1 Share |
Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by Korllami007: 4:37pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
Heathrow44: That's why over 70% of divorce were initiated by women in usa. There was one woman that advised women to take it all during divorce in Steve Harvey show and the women in the show stood up and clapped for her. I was just pitying those men in that country. Dem don render them useless. Marriage for West na cash out plan for women. 1 Like |
Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by omoharry(f): 4:40pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
Henvest:So you are suggesting that the man stays abroad alone while his family remain here in Nigeria ? Then why marry at all ? Its either he remains here with his family or he marries over them and be with them .It make no sense for a man to be abroad while his wife and kids remain in a different country apart . Why marry in the first place ? Anyway ,it's seem painful & unfair when men are at the receiving end of social injustice in the U.K. .But over here in Nigeria ,women have been abused and maligned for crying out for injustice by thier husbands and our society will tell them to go back home and be a dutiful wife so that the man would be of good behavior . Men would cheat on thier wives ,bring home-deadly diseases, due to thier philandering ,beat up these women if they dare stand up to protest against thier husband and take thier children away from them, if they dare ask for divorce .Especially when the wife is not financially independent . I sympathize with these men that are going through hell in the U.K, due to thier divorce from thier wives . But I still believe Nigerian men still export thier alpha male tendencies with thier wives in the U.K. They should know that over there in the U.K. the woman is king but here in Nigeria they are subject and powerless . They should learn how to adjust accordingly depending on the country they are . 3 Likes |
Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by Suspect33(m): 4:41pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
MansoryMX:I'd rather stay single than walk on eggshells just so I don't offend a woman, nonsense, wahala for who no sign prenuptial agreement 2 Likes |
Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by franchasng: 4:41pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
This should serve as a lesson to all the Nigerian men living abroad who invest all their life savings and income abroad thinking they are now Barrack Obama. Always think home. If he had used the money he invested in acquiring that house his covetous wife has taken over now in building houses in Nigeria, his life wouldn't be the way it is now because he can always fall back to it to stand back on his feet. As a married man, any house you build or acquire in US, UK, South Korea, Canada, Australia, and most European countries indirectly belongs to your wife should any marital issue arise in future. So as a Nigerian bred man living abroad, before you buy a house abroad, make sure you have built at least 2 mansions in top 2 Nigerian cities as a backup for tomorrow. This was what messed up former football star Emmanuel Eboue in the UK. Black African men refused to learn and they will keep paying the price. Think home, forget all the noise nobody is ready to fight another civil war in Nigeria, so forget that thinking that Nigeria will burn tomorrow, it won't 7 Likes 1 Share |
Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by saajus: 4:44pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
I won't judge cos this is a one-sided story. One thing I have observed in many wives is that they can suppress pressure so much. But, when they explode, may God help you. We've not heard from the wife. But, don't be surprised that the man may be the one that brought this misfortune upon himself. I remember a video circulating around a few months ago of a Nigerian man in the UK that his wife threw his belongings out. People were raining curses on his wife. Later the truth came out that the man is extremely wicked. The man left his real wife with three children and move in with a side chick. The side chick was the one that threw his belongings out. Don't take your wife for granted. If she's ignoring or pardoning your bad deeds, she's not a fool. If you continue your bad ways, she will explode someday and you will regret ever being born. For now, his friends should rally round him. Help him so that he won't injure himself. 8 Likes |
Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by Nobody: 4:45pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
Keshinr0: US is a little bit more fairer than UK when it comes to divorces!!! UK's own and mostly Europe is so damn annoying 1 Like |
Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by grafixdon: 4:46pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by franchasng: 4:46pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
omoharry:You are talking nonsense, I personally sent my wife and baby away to a saner country for a purpose. Most wealthy men all over the world don't spend much time with their family, only broke and insecure men glue on to their wife daily humping her and manufacturing babies yearly. How many days does Bill Gates and Melinda spend in a whole year when he is busy touring the world for business and philanthropy Stop thinking like ancient men. You can actually live in a different country from your wife and still enjoy a blissful marriage than those who live with their wife. I am a living testimony to that okay 6 Likes |
Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by anonymousposts: 4:47pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
I will usually not reply to many things here but in order to help you and make you understand that it is not the end of the world, I will share my experience and a little advice I had a similar experience and it is a common scam in the UK. I went through a divorce 6 years ago and I know a friend who is going through one at the moment too Do not mind the people calling you names - most times, things happen in spite of our cleverness and good intentions -m just listen here So in my own case - I tried my best to make the marriage work, I put my ex in nursing school - scratch that - college to gain qualification for nursing school then nursing school. I also helped sort out her immigration issues. Those two things cost a lot of money for those who know I was already a top-ten percent earner in the UK( that starts at £100,000 p.a as at then BTW), never cheated, watched out for her best interest and I was a Christian leader as at then. In fact, she was the only reason I couldn't buy a property earlier than I did, I wanted her to rise to meet similar financial status as mine. She and her mother used to call me "oloore mi" - my helper translated from Yoruba Then as soon as she started making a little headway she became really nasty, setting me up every time, throwing me out of the house at will. I, all of a sudden became a stingy man( funny enough I am nearly sure I was among the highest-paid all around us then and all income went into the marriage and I even took money from my mother at times) My mum became a witch to her (it was my mum that encouraged me to put her in nursing school o, she herself being a nurse. ) I became the lazy guy to her- meanwhile, I was paying an au-pair £700 per month to look after her and our kids whilst I worked o(an aupair is the UK equivalent of house help in Nigeria ) aupair clened cooked etc, she sat pretty - to earn £100k, you have to wake up really early to go to the city and come back late oh - and loads of traveling I was thinking, I'm a Christian I didn't want to get a divorce. You see, I worked for a multi-national Oil and Gas firm, and being a friendly and humble guy, I will usually go downstairs to chat with the dinner ladies and among them a very beautiful, mixed race 23 years old who really liked me and wanted to date me then even but genuinely I wanted to honour God, despite going weeks without sex as a married man Then I bought a house. I genuinely wanted to add her name but because she hadn't attained her PR status banks refused(she had exceptional leave) and then the set up was now too much one day I don't know what happened but my younger daughter got locked inside her room - I wasn't even there ( I believe she orchestrated it BTW) and usually you break the door by your self or called the Fire marshalls at worst but she called the Police - whilst I was trying to break the door The police came and started asking if I was attacking them. At that point it became clear to me, my life was in danger so I was praying nonetheless Then one day I traveled to work and came back, she was gone with the children. Imagine how devastating and then I started begging( whilst aware that she started dating someone else - Aupair told me o Then social services got involved( you are finished the moment social services gets involved in any case) the social services guy was from the same Nigerian town as her and for whatever reason(I have my guesses though) he lied against me in his report - several lies and said I admitted to things that even if I had done them(I didn't) no one with a reasonable IQ would agree to Eventually, I filed for divorce, and then only then she didn't want divorce again. She was calling my friends, hiding from the court bailiff - here is someone trying her hardest to tarnish my image with lies and set up but I pushed Crucially, she got a non-molestation order( that order is called the liar order as you don't have to prove anything - just that you are scared of someone and they will issue it - almost always against a man) In total Police came 5 times( I called them once) but crucially, I was smarter - there was no reason for me to be warned or arrested so no record against me Now the part you can learn from I paid for court bailiffs to track her down and serve her papers and she asked for about 70% of everything I owned( 60% of the equity of the house in the UK and my property in Nigeria). My lawyers were saying I should go to court blah, blah but I was smarter. I was able to work things out Sometimes, lawyers are looking after their pocket not you so you need to be smart. If I went to court, I will have to pay for my lawyers(£100 an hour) and her lawyers( £100 an hour) and that can last months so the differential is always not going to favour me. Besides, there is no way she won't get a chunk of it in a UK court despite that I owned them 100% so I agreed. Again she took ages to come back, she didn't respond for 8 months as truly, I had treated her very well and at that point reality must have dawned on her so I kept pushing and I will travel all over the world to take my mind off things. I had one issue then - how do I get 60% of equity to pay her off - I was broke and tired. I had carried everyone on my head - her, her mum, her family, kids, au pair - hoping that she would finish her studies, appreciate and support me. If only I knew that my struggles were just beginning then But I had one thing going for me. Prayers then I got a contract that paid like double what I was earning - so it turns out that God was working for me - in the time that she was stalling, I was getting paid double and met my current wife who is 20,000 times the person she was( of course my opinion) so eventually her lawyers responded after I kept hassling them and she thought I wouldn't be able to pay her off. She was ready to move back into the house All in all, it cost me about £70,000 plus regular maintenance for the children. It would have been double if I went to court I am far richer than she left me though. Far richer and in a much better place However, I won every time we went to the family court for the children. So I have access If you are the one in the right, somehow God will find a way to reward your faithfulness I can offer to train you in IT for free and you will get a good job. It will help to redirect you to a better place Don't go to Nigeria though. Stick it out travel on vacation You will be ok 16 Likes |
Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by Nobody: 4:50pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
Heathrow44: Lol, looking at it the future would be tough for women. Daily men are getting uninterested in marriage. Taking bezos as an example, imagine he never married. It would be an Herculean task for Elon Musk to meet up so quick. 1 Like |
Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by omoharry(f): 4:50pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
nashito:Guy cool down na!Haba!! It happens to both both sec . In Nigeria ,the man is king and the woman goes through all manner of injustice and in the U.K, the woman is queen and the man suffers the same fate like thier counterpart in Nigeria .Maje una chill Abeg . I watch ID too ..Most of the murder cases are cause by greed (due to life insurance ,which they will benefit on the spouse demise ) and it happens both ways . It not enough to justify why a man should take A life 3 Likes |
Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by na2016: 4:55pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
ednut1: Yeah, I get it now. You are correct |
Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by Nobody: 4:56pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
Keshinr0: Whether u like it or not, the future would be female sooner than u expect, cos a lot of men have turn to be feminists in Nigeria, u see a lot of men in seminars about girl child education, domestic violence, IPV, u see them in protests about women rights, u see yayaha bello of kogi advancing women's rights and overseeing that they are empowered, u see tony elumelu making sure girls get education without giving a hoot about males and u say the future isn't female, is a bitter truth, I must say, the future is indeed female unless men stand up to advance men's rights and be conservative! 1 Like |
Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by Tats(m): 4:58pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
drlaykay: People in Canada have become experts in getting various types of letters (financial, bank accounts, IOU, medical) from Nigeria to back up their divorce cases and the Canadian courts take those letters very seriously. So I am not surprised about what you wrote. 5 Likes |
Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by baralatie(m): 4:58pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
Heathrow44:the dude did not get the memo yet |
Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by baralatie(m): 4:59pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
drlaykay:jesus! mogbe |
Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by Nobody: 5:01pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
Keshinr0: Jeff bezos would eventually get married again someday! |
Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by Nobody: 5:03pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
Heathrow44: Word, really love this. Gradually the society is neglecting the male child The more educated a woman becomes the more difficult to have a stable marriage. 1 Like |
Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by Tats(m): 5:03pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
Built2last: I'm not sure universal credit can pay his rent. he needs to go to his council and declare homelessness. He can go onto the housing register but his turn will not reach for the next 3 years to be given a single flat because a single man is the least priority on the housing list. Sick and vulnerable people, single parents, families, single women all have higher priority on the list. A single man is the least priority on that list. With homelessness, that is the only way council can give him money for rent and that will be for one room in a shared house or apartment at no more than about £500 a month is what councils can afford. |
Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by Nobody: 5:04pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
Heathrow44:His problem |
Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by baralatie(m): 5:05pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
Heathrow44:na you go give am wife abi na you go carry him finger sign marriage documents |
Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by Cryptomillion: 5:05pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
ohhh |
Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by baralatie(m): 5:07pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
Keshinr0:not true though! all these cases involving Nigerian men are majorly with the less educated ones. 1 Like |
Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by Tats(m): 5:07pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
RisenPhoenix1: Many ladies do their homework about all your assets before the "show" begins. If any hidden assets not declared are made known to the courts even after the divorce proceedings are over, the case may be reopened and you will pay dearly for not declaring it. 1 Like |
Re: How Did You Survive Your Divorce In The UK? by Nobody: 5:08pm On Mar 08, 2021 |
baralatie: You meant, educated naija men don't face divorce |
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