Revolva:
you married a stupid woman........i have seen family of 5 managing with 55k or less and love is there in their two bed room face me face you


that lady is gonna wreck you down......

See ediot talking...we are talking of baby triplets here not full grown children.

You have a family now and you need to carry your cross. Go and learn how to pacify a woman. What you are dropping at home for four people is truly small. You need to know the stress of breastfeeding three kids, postpartum stress, cleaning and stuff. Hormonal changes in women alone after childbirth is enough to be crazy at every little thing. So, if you are not giving her enough money, you need to find a way to be calming her down. All her shouting is due to the accumulation of stress. You need to always rekindle her hope in you. You need to always show the things you are attempting to improve the income of the family.

The deed has been done. You have three wonderful kids. Some people have all the wealth in this world and asking for just one but, the pregnancy is not coming. Keep selling hope to your woman every day and you will see how her attitude will change. Women like hope; won gbebo, dem dey bring am, dem dey bring am.. Show her some business plans that will bring millions, even if the money has not come, she will be so happy that her husband is making moves to change the situation. Don't jinx this for the sake of those three kids.

Most women are not crazy. But, if you want to handle all situations with fire, they are always ready for you. They are incubators. That is, throw a stone at them, they will throw a rock at you. Speak one bad word, they will give you ten. Give them sperm, they will give you kids.

Lomprico2:
so your dick still dey rise despite putting u in d condition you are today?

LoL!!

That's how poverty geta transmitted from generation to generation

OP the thing you will do is to call your wife one early morning and talk to her, possibly cry your heart out for her to see the truth in your eyes. It's not easy and you can't do much because the economic situation is not helping matters at all. Talk to her and make her to reason with you for the sake of those beautiful babies (I love and wish to have triplets). Also suggest the idea of her starting a small business no matter how small, it will help. And most importantly, welcome and rededictae your life and family to God. There is nothing He cannot do or situation He cannot change.

Katier00:
please grow up. How can a woman with 3kids as babies work without help? Those kids are her job for the next 2yrs. Do you know how much is baby food in the market? Op is keeping 20k for himself yet expecting to be feeding breakfast, lunch and dinner from that same upkeep money from his wife. The young man should double his hustle and provide for his young family at least basic needs[i][/i]

Pls re read it again, if Op give his wife 50% of his income and gives his Mum N10k how does he keep N20k for himself?

Kriss216:

So, what is the wife contributing to the family? A man shouldn't care for his mum cos he got married to a senseless lady?

If 50% of the guy's income ain't enough for the wife, then, nothing in this world would be enough for her. She's inconsiderate and she's not a woman to bring happiness in a man's life.

You are heartless, you obviously don't know what it takes to care of a child let alone three. It's draining especially when you live in Nigeria and you get little or no support. She is obviously frustrated being a first time mother of three and could be suffering from post partum depression. 25k is nothing. Think about how much diapers cost first for three children in a month plus baby milk, obviously she can breastfeed three babies at the same time.
Do you know that woman won't get enough rest at night feeding babies through the night. Parenting isn't an easy job.

You might not like my ideas but it will do you some good if you can borrowed from it. you need 3 things, 1 Peace; you and your wife need to be at peace its not anybody's faults that things are like this and if there is someone to blame its both of you. marriage is a responsibility and not a place of complaints.
2 Planing; guy you need planing not a one man show you have to plan how things should be in the next 5 years using your current reality. its this planing that will tight the bound between the two of you because the truth is that Nigerian economy is becoming something else and your children are growing. and when you guy plan for something don't betray the plan try to be open to her with your finance and make her contribute to the growth of the family not necessary finance, she could be the strategic person or the executor of action for the family.
3 You need to be Bold as a man, you must stamp your authority in the family, you must design the way and manner you want your family to be, not by fighting or by making noise but by bringing back your manipulating game the one you use to woo her. giving her intelligent ideas and showing her how the family will soon become independent if she follow the plan with you.
One last thing no salary is too small to plan around. and no lottery win is too big to spend anyhow.

25k for 3 pikin, mom and food. Egbami. Pls get a better job. You need more money. Ppl saying she should go and work are not living in reality. What is the cost of day care?

If na me sef, I will nag hubby tire. Go and look for more money.

Kestolove:
with triplet u still want to fvck and u only give 25k per month..some men are useless walahi

Lmao why are you pretending condoms or birth control pills don't exist anymore? Nawa o

Brother be patient with her... Or increase the money.. To become a man i s not a day job... just be patient pls or look for loan to open provision or food shop for her so that she will always leave the house to also hustle.. This is what I did and am happy. Am a civil servant my take home is nothing to write home about.. I just went to take some loan from bank and workers welfare and open a supermarket for her.. But today even if am not paid she run the home till when I will get paid and I will bring my quota.. upon all this, we still dey quarrel.. so I will advice you to be patient..

oceanized25:
Brother erm,your wife is right o...e be like you stingy small.
You give ur wife 20k n later 25k after many argument for the family upkeep...you guys are 4 in number,o wrong nau.
I am single,I don't consider myself as one who spends recklessly at all but uses 40k monthly...but somehow you feel you,wife,n kids should use 25k?
Try raise the money for family upkeep,I think 45k or 50 could be something for a prudent woman considering you don't have much.

Nice comment sir! Problem is that 55k is insufficient to run a home with three fragile babies (nor to talk of the 25k he recently reviewed it to).

He needs to plead for more understanding from his wife while he consciously and urgently works on earning more. Else, the frictions would continue until she make good her threat.

wow... that is really nice

Kestolove:
with triplet u still want to fvck and u only give 25k per month..some men are useless walahi

Lmao why are you pretending condoms or birth control pills don't exist anymore? So make person no bang again because e born? Nawa o

Condom is 50 naira

Righteousness2:
My Brother, what you are Facing right now are the Consequences we get when we decide to leave GOD'S way and go our way.
The Bible says ,
if thou will hearken.. you Expect this.
Likewise there are things we expect when we don't hearken.

Having Said that, you are Married right now so you are Husband and wife.
The Missing link I see in your Home is JESUS. You both need to Genuiely Surrender to JESUS.

You as the Head of the Home could be the link to bring JESUS into your Home.
Personally Surrender to JESUS, do away with all worldly stuff and let her see JESUS in you.

I Tell you she will have no other choice than to Join you and in no time you will see a whole new Home enjoying Peace from above.

Sorry to say but he needs a better Job. Pastors will always tell you you need Jesus for your finances to grow but when they need money for a project the same pastor will tell the church to contribute rather than calling on Jesus.

saajus:
You have a family now and you need to carry your cross. Go and learn how to pacify a woman. What you are dropping at home is truly low. You need to know the stress of breastfeeding three kids, postpartum stress, cleaning and stuff. So, if you are not giving her enough money, you need to find a way to be calming her down. All her shouting are due to the accumulation of stress. You need to always rekindle her hope in you. You need to always show the things you are attempting to improve the income of the family.

The deed has been done. You have three wonderful kids. Some people have all the wealth in this world and asking for just one but, the pregnancy is not coming. Keep selling hope to your woman every day and you will see how her attitude will change. Women like hope; won gbebo, dem dey bring am, dem dey bring am.. Show her some business plans that will bring millions, even if the money has not come, she will be so happy that her husband is making moves to change the situation. Don't jinx this for the sake of those three kids.

he's spending 20k on himself and expects the mother and 3 children to share 5k each?

It is well

Op no try at all.

Instead of using pampers, let the mother use cloth nappies, she can save pampers money that way. Use pampers only overnight.

Two breasts is not enough to feed 3 children at once.

If things are not well handled, one or more of the children might die of malnutrition. This is how it starts.

adedayoa2:
you no see where I pray for am make God give am better job?

Prayer without work is useless abeg,The man level is N50k the woman should learn to accept this fact and face reality, they are poor, at least she knows this b4 marriage. There are gatemen and drivers who earn N40k n are happily married, we nor dey hear pem

Thomthom:
Brother be patient with her... Or increase the money.. To become a man i s not a day job... just be patient pls or look for loan to open provision or food shop for her so that she will always leave the house to also hustle.. This is what I did and am happy. Am a civil servant my take home is nothing to write home about.. I just went to take some loan from bank and workers welfare and open a supermarket for her.. But today even if am not paid she run the home till when I will get paid and I will bring my quota.. upon all this, we still dey quarrel.. so I will advice you to be patient..

3 KIDS at once is a thankless FULL TIME job.

May these children not kill you and your wife before time.

erico2k2:

And how many Hours do you think the man sleeps?

if he’s staying up at night to breastfeed or bottle feed the babies. Or change their diapers. Or hush them when they cry, his sleeplessness will be relevant.

Otherwise why does it matter?
He’s sleepless doing what? Helping the family?

The time you were chooking her you didn't remember to use protection.

Satan wan punish you you come score 3 once Greedy man

You must take care of them.

You brought this upon yourself.

I tried to contact Amadioha on your behalf but my phone says he's not reachable at the moment.

I am sorry bro there's nothing else I can do

erico2k2:

Pls re read it again, if Op give his wife 50% of his income and gives his Mum N10k how does he keep N20k for himself?

wife 20k, op 20k, mum 10k savings 5k. Later he increased the wife's own to 25k so what did I say wrong here

Prospertochu:
I got my girlfriend then now wife pregnant, I wasn't ready for marriage. My plan was to take care of her and my baby while she stays in her father's house, her mother was fine with it as long as I take care of my responsibilities, but everything changed when the scan confirmed that she was carrying triples, her mother said I must marry her because there's no way her daughter will still under her roofs with 3 children.

I pleaded with her to give me sometimes to find my own accommodations because I was living in my father's family house after his demise I stay with his siblings while my mum left with my younger sister.

My mother in law refused saying I must do something fast because she doesn't want people to mocked her that her daughter has gotten pregnant out of wedlock not just with one baby but 3 so I managed to save enough money to get a place for our own but her mother refused saying I must pay her bride price first, I didn't have any more money so i have borrowed from friends and added to the money I had to pay for her bride price. It wasn't a big party just something small, I took my wife to my father family house where we are living now with our triplets but things hasn't been easy for me, taking care of 3 children it's not easy, I am grateful that I am rent free but household bills are killing me.

My wife and I are always arguing because she keeps asking for more money my salary is 55k I use to give her 20k monthly, 10 monthly to my mother and I use 20 and save 5k she said the money wasn't enough that I am stingy, I now started giving her 25k she is still complaining about the money not being enough. I refused giving her more she started staving me of sex and foods. My family are tired of separating us fighting almost every day, my uncle has asked us to leave the compound because we are disturbing there peace and I had to beg him to forgive us that ur shouldn't be happening again and I cautioned my wife but she is threatening to abandon me with the kids. I have told her to do her worse because I am tired of her madness. I wish I never married her in the first, all I could've do is to take care of my kids and let her be I know it's too late now to change the past but what should I do?

@OP, don't regret marrying her, you are in this together. You guys were not prepared at all. To get married you have to be prepared, financially, mentally, emotionally, socially. Please just live with the consequences of your choice, your young wife is exhausted and frustrated from taking care of three little children. It's not an easy job at all. You have to double your hustle as she won't be able to contribute for a while.

She may also feel trapped as she virtually doesn't have a life for now. Encourage her to visit, a family planning home and get a check up, she may be prone to post partum depression which new mothers are usually susceptible to.

You guys need tons of patience to navigate this period. You should give her some support with chores especially over the weekend. If you don't do that just expect to live with a mad woman plus she would resent you. Please at every given opportunity assure her of your love and support. She will start to calm down. All she needs is support with the children.
This time shall pass.

Kriss216:

So, what is the wife contributing to the family? A man shouldn't care for his mum cos he got married to a senseless lady?

If 50% of the guy's income ain't enough for the wife, then, nothing in this world would be enough for her. She's inconsiderate and she's not a woman to bring happiness in a man's life.

It's not about marriage anymore. I'm sure if she knew better, she wouldn't have settled with him either.

It's about three children here. Fvcking three and he's leaving 20k for feeding. Can he alone even survive on 20k monthly? He even said he saves 5k. Can you see the guy doesn't know what a mess he's found himself.

He's at the middle of a huge financial mess and he's still bothered that his wife is taking caution about sex. If they couldn't stop pregnancy when they were not married yet, shouldn't he realised he'll get her pregnant again?

I really pity the children because they, in fact, have very useless parents.

Is it too late to say don't have sex and don't have unprotected sex?

pozehnani:
I like the way you live to face the consequences of your actions. ( fornicating). If someone tried to preach to you then to stop fornicating you'll have called him names and bullshit him. Now you're crying foul and asking what to do.

Did you seek advice when your body was scratching you and losing control? Mr, man carry your cross. In your next world, you'll learn to control your manhood.

I wish those who are still engaging in fornication and premarital sex don't stop. They will always meet it in front.

If women would take little responsibility for themselves, then this could have been avoided. Simply asking your man to wear rain coat, or taking other preventive measures would have averted this mess op is going through. But no, they won't.

erico2k2:

But the man take home is N50k make E take person do yahoo plus B4 una eye go reach ground

na why we dey encourage am to hustle Harder.
na life circumstances nak am.
if say na 1 pikin, things for easy but na 3 do e no go easy.
problem must just dey.
make him just endure and buckle up.
with time, things go better..

Prospertochu:
I got my girlfriend then now wife pregnant, I wasn't ready for marriage. My plan was to take care of her and my baby while she stays in her father's house, her mother was fine with it as long as I take care of my responsibilities, but everything changed when the scan confirmed that she was carrying triples, her mother said I must marry her because there's no way her daughter will still under her roofs with 3 children.

I pleaded with her to give me sometimes to find my own accommodations because I was living in my father's family house after his demise I stay with his siblings while my mum left with my younger sister.

My mother in law refused saying I must do something fast because she doesn't want people to mocked her that her daughter has gotten pregnant out of wedlock not just with one baby but 3 so I managed to save enough money to get a place for our own but her mother refused saying I must pay her bride price first, I didn't have any more money so i have borrowed from friends and added to the money I had to pay for her bride price. It wasn't a big party just something small, I took my wife to my father family house where we are living now with our triplets but things hasn't been easy for me, taking care of 3 children it's not easy, I am grateful that I am rent free but household bills are killing me.

My wife and I are always arguing because she keeps asking for more money my salary is 55k I use to give her 20k monthly, 10 monthly to my mother and I use 20 and save 5k she said the money wasn't enough that I am stingy, I now started giving her 25k she is still complaining about the money not being enough. I refused giving her more she started staving me of sex and foods. My family are tired of separating us fighting almost every day, my uncle has asked us to leave the compound because we are disturbing there peace and I had to beg him to forgive us that ur shouldn't be happening again and I cautioned my wife but she is threatening to abandon me with the kids. I have told her to do her worse because I am tired of her madness. I wish I never married her in the first, all I could've do is to take care of my kids and let her be I know it's too late now to change the past but what should I do?

All the folks telling you here to let her go are not married and would not understand.
To start with, 50k is pittance for a family of five. Any woman with triplets and presently out of work will not be happy wirh 50k monthly let alone 25k. Are you kidding me? I understand that you are angry and all, but you have no right whatsoever to push tge blame on her, none whatsoever.
Your focus now ahould be finding ways to improve your finances. Thats all.
If you didnt marry her and she was living with her parents, you would probably not give her that much and still complain. The problem is not your wife, its your finances. Unless your mother is sick or old and can no longer work, reduce her allowance to 5k. You, on your own part need to make serious adjustments to squeeze out more for the children. Trek when you can, starve when possible but make sure the children and thier mom eat especially if she is still breastfeeding.

Part of the problem I am sensing from your post is that you feel like you are giving your wife money for herself not for the children. That is very wrong. Those telling you to let her go spend more than 25k on themselves alone monthly and they expect your wife to turn to professor peller abi ChrisAngel. Do not listen to them.

Welcome to fatherhood. Now some of you may begin to appreciate your fathers more and understand the hidden sacrifices they made without ever complaining. Appreciating only mothers is partly why some men act the way they act, afterall they wont be appreciated so why bother.

Kriss216:
A woman you're giving almost 50% of your monthly income and she's still not satisfied is not the right one for you, bro.



Channel your energy, time, finances on your kids. That woman will never give you happiness.

25K is NOTHING in today's Nigeria..
Let's tell ourselves the truth..
The only cause of quarrel in that family is poverty and not the wife's attitude..

coldFLARES1:
Nice comment sir! Problem is that 55k is insufficient to run a home with three fragile babies (nor to talk of the 25k he recently reviewed it to).

He needs to plead for more understanding from his wife while he consciously and urgently works on earning more. Else, the frictions would continue until she make good her threat.

when she makes good on her threat, things will be even worse for him.

No outside woman or grandmother in her right will take care of his 3 pooping, crying responsibilities called babies with that money he is giving his wife. Theu will tell him to come and carry them back or worse still squander the money and maltreat the babies.

Abeg update Barca match for front page. 4-1 victory

55k a month for 5 of you...hmmm..solve ur finances and your family is settled..i hope u are not using dipers on them...napkin for now..when do u close from work? Sir try to double ur hustle...atleat if u can be getting 2k a day it will help plus your 55k..for now she can't work..cuz caring for 3 children is already a job especialy if there is a son amongst them..God help u..me i pray my wife give birth to twins...2 girls...

The feeling is mutual my friend

Obason22:
I hate to see people like u.