Good day nairalanders, my name is Yinka and am also a twin. I have an issue bothering me and wished to post it here openly in the hope that I will get useful advice/opinion.

This post may seem long and therefore turn off those who hate long epistles but pls endeavour to read it as your advice/opinion might be beneficial to me.

I have thought of creating an alternative moniker to post this or at least lied that the problem is been faced by one of my friend and so he needs your advice like some pretentious nairalanders do, but decided to be bold enough and be real since this is just an online forum.

Sorry for digressing, now to the koko of the matter,I am 22 years old, will be 23 next January, earning a decent salary working as a hair stylist in a large unisex saloon, I have hearing loss as in total deafness though I could speak fluently, was not born deaf but an accident caused it while I was in primary school, the story of how I became deaf is one for another day, but with sheer determination and faith and Gods Grace I managed to complete both primary and secondary schooling but gave up on going further as I have no believe I could survive higher school.

My deafness affected me in very many ways, physiologicaly and emotionally and almost daily, but I hardly allow myself brood over it for a long time, the worst I have done was to cry in secret on more than four occasion for having such a terrible disability.

Ok well, my deafness affected my relationship with the opposite sex so much such that I have never had a girl friend meaning am still a virgin, though I relieve myself of what nairalanders called Konji by doing controlled mas2bation when I feel like, I could have used Oloshos to relieve myself but I considered them as dirty people and can't imagine losing my virginity to a prostitute.

I have tried summoning confidence to toast gals but our conversation is usually very short and not impressive due to the fact I don't know how to prolong such conversations and most of the ideas I saw online hardly applied to such conversation involving a person like me wit hearing loss. I communicate like a normal person by lip reading(hope u know what that is), though not always an effective means of communication but I had no other choice as my parents and me hated the idea of me learning sign language and they vehemently resisted those who suggested it when the deafness problem started.The only problem I have with lip reading was that whenever I don't understand what the other person was saying, I would indicate and ask him to repeat but if it persist I ask him or her to write it with the finger and you will agree with me that such inconvenience might be a big turn of when trying to talk to a stranger like a beautiful gal I admired.

There is this girl I admired that works as a sales girl in my aunt's pharmacy shop, she frequently passed in front of our saloon and have started having feelings for her, fortunately she know I have hearing loss and also knew I am a nephew to her boss and sometimes greets me when passing by like "boda taye",lol and I had just waved and answer "bawo ni", ordinarily I should not have problem toasting her but the fear of my deafness disappointing me and the fact I don't know anything to say that could make the toasting successfull apart from, what is your name, I want to marry you, where do you live, can I have your number, can I take you out on a date next Sunday? Bla bla bla.lol

Also there is the problem I usually encounter with young gals, when I told them I want to marry you, they be like "omo kekere ni mi" meaning am a small girl and I be like how old are you, but can we just be friends bla bla bla, any suggestion to how to properly deal with such response will be appreciated in case the gal I planned to toast say such(she looks 19+). It is not like she is out of my class or too beautiful, no no no not at all, even my twin sister is more classier.

Thanks for reading this far, I know this might seem like an unusual problem but I believe you will have one or two ideas/opinions which I might find useful in other to overcome my deafness and win over this gal. I have no intention of using and dumping her, just date her with the hope of finding her compatible for marriage when the time comes and lastly to relieve myself of Konji the natural way after having gained her trust and affection.

Modified. E be like say I want more opinions, oya CC: lalasticlala abeg do the needful.

WOOPS! having taking the stress and time
My opinion is this... be yourself and never do
to impress ladies, the one who truly loves you
will come. Mind you, there might be a surgery
for the hearing probs. Your focus should be on
that for now!

Bro I feel your pain tho. You could start be writing a love letter to her making her know your intentions towards her. Pour out your mind in the letter, don't be shy. We can't say she also might have personal likeness for you.

donTbone:
WOOPS! having taking the stress and time
My opinion is this... be yourself and never do
to impress ladies, the one who truly loves you
will come. Mind you, there might be a surgery
for the hearing probs. Your focus should be on
that for now!

noted bro,thanks but am sure u know some feeling are difficult to suppress,so it will be hard to take your advice of waiting for a true love to come,as for trying to impress gals I get your point and will never do that.

Olayinka8793:
noted bro,thanks but am sure u know some feeling are difficult to suppress,so it will be hard to take your advice of waiting for a true love to come,as for trying to impress gals I get your point and will never do that.

Waiting doesn't mean you just do nothing... but I'd advice you plan well for your self and future first before any gal comes to mind!

DiegoNakel:
Bro I feel your pain tho. You could start be writing a love letter to her making her know your intentions towards her. Pour out your mind in the letter, don't be shy. We can't say she also might have personal likeness for you.

thanks bro.I think letter writing is no longer in vogue this days,more so them ladies eyes don open well that they considered men toasting them indirectly via letter and text or call as a sign of lack of confidence.moreover I don't know her enough to know how matured she is as she might laugh over a love letter or read it with her friends.

.

donTbone:

Waiting doesn't mean you just do nothing... but I'd advice you plan well for your self and future first before any gal comes to mind!

sure bro,my future is my priority but then we all have a desire to love and be loved.

Olayinka8793:
sure bro,my future is my priority but then we all have a desire to love and be loved.

OK

The first thing is to be yourself.....look beyond d said deafness.You write well...so I think you are quite intelligent.Make friend with her....with dat She must have been convinced of your worth...I am not a fan of toasting by d road side actually. friendship first.Continue being a good guy.Think of getting better..both medically and career wise.

Hmmm its just so infortunate bt I bliv there can still be a cure for the ear prob as per gettin a girl pple who re more disabled than u re gettin married just take ur tym d gud woman meant 4 u wl com.ladies cant be impressed if dey dnt love u little can impressimg dem
do

Olayinka8793:
thanks bro.I think letter writing is no longer in vogue this days,more so them ladies eyes don open well that they considered men toasting them indirectly via letter and text or call as a sign of lack of confidence.moreover I don't know her enough to know how matured she is as she might laugh over a love letter or read it with her friends.

People do appreciate little things at times. But no need, you could indirectly ask her out !!!

Swissheart:
The first thing is to be yourself.....look beyond d said deafness.You write well...so I think you are quite intelligent.Make friend with her....with dat She must have been convinced of your worth...I am not a fan of toasting by d road side actually. friendship first.Continue being a good guy.Think of getting better..both medically and career wise.

noted,thanks ma'am.Friendship first? Hmmmm Makes sense until I found myself friendzoned.will try sha.

Olayinka8793:
Good day nairalanders,my name is Yinka and am also a twins. I have an issue bothering me and wished to post it here openly in the hope that I will get useful advice/opinion.
This post may seem long and therefore turn off those who hate long epistles but pls endeavour to read it as your advice/opinion might be beneficial to me.
I have thought of creating an alternative moniker to post this or at least lied that the problem is been faced by one of my friend and so he needs ur advice like some pretentious nairalanders do,but decided to be bold enough and be real since this is just an online forum.
Sorry for digressing,now to the koko of the matter,I am 22 years old,will be 23 next January,earning a decent salary working as a hair stylist in a large unisex saloon,I have hearing loss as in total deafness thought I could speak fluently,was not born deaf but an accident caused it while I was in primary school,the story of how I became deaf is one for another day,but with sheer determination and faith and Gods Grace I managed to complete both primary and secondary schooling but gave up on going further as I have no believe I could survive higher school.
My deafness affected me in very many ways,physiologicaly and emotionally and almost daily,but I hardly allow myself brood over it for a long time,the worst I have done was to cry in in secret on more than four occasion for having such a terrible disability.
Ok well,my deafness affected my relationship wit the opposite sex so much such that I have never had a girl friend meaning am still a virgin,thought I relieve myself of what nairalanders called Konji by doing controlled mas2bation when I feel like, I could have used Oloshos to relieve myself but I considered them as dirty people and can't imagined losing my virginity to a prostitute.
I have tried summoning confidence to toast gals but our conversation is usually very short and not impressive due to the fact I don't know how to prolong such conversations and most of the ideas I saw online hardly applied to such conversation involving a person like me wit hearing loss.I communicate like a normal person by lip reading(hope u know what that is),thought not always an effective means of communication but I had no other choice as my parents and me hated the idea of me learning sign language and they vehemently resisted those who suggested it when the deafness problem started.The only problem I have with lip reading was that whenever I don't understand what the other person was saying,I would indicate and ask him to repeat but if it persist I ask him or her to write it with the finger and u will agree wit me that such inconvenience might be a big turn of when trying to talk to a stranger like a beautiful gal I admired.
The is this girl I admired that works as a sales girl in my aunt's pharmacy shop,she frequently passed in front of our saloon and have started having feelings for her,fortunately she know I have hearing loss and also knew I am a nephew to her boss and sometimes greets me when passing by like "boda taye",lol nd I had just waved and answer "bawo ni",ordinarily I should not have problem toasting her but the fear of my deafness disappointing me and the fact I don't know anything to say that could make the toasting successfull apart from,what is your name,I want to marry u,where do u live,can I have your number,can I take u out on a date next Sunday bla bla bla.lol
also there is the problem I usually encounter wit young gals,when I told them I want to marry u,they be like "omo kekere ni mi" meaning am a small girl and I be like how old are u,but can we just be friends bla bla bla,any suggestion to how to properly deal wit such response will be appreciated in case the gal I planned to toast say such(she looks 19+).It is not like she is out of my class or too beautiful,no no no not at all,even my twin sister is more classier.
Thanks for reading this far,I know this might seem like an unusual problem but I believe u will have one or two ideas/opinions which I might find useful in other to overcome my deafness and win over this gal.I have no intention of using and dumping her,just date her wit the hope of finding her compatible for marriage when the time come and lastly to relieve myself of Konji the natural way after having gained her trust and affection.
Modified.E be like say I want more opinions,oya CC: lalasticlala abeg do the needful.

I don't really know what to say..but from what u've said I think u have an advantage..at least she knows ur challenge.. why not visit your aunts shop more often..try to be friends with her first,with that If u still like her after knowing her better just naturally woo her..
modified: front page..he he he...even though na night shift..half bread better pass akara

Incase

Op U tell Girls of 18- 22years u want to marry Her?
That is a GrandTicket to de ZONE
Anyways don't let your diasbility hold you down
It is well Bro

tosyne2much:
I almost shed tears reading the 3rd, 4th and 5th paragraph


My brother, please don't see yourself less a person because of your disability. At least you should give thanks to God that you can at least talk. However, there are thousands of people out there who can neither talk nor hear, so don't live your life crying in secret places


That aside


You disability can never stop you from finding that right girl. Just keep searching (but don't be too desperate) and I can assure you that when the right girl comes, she will accept you whole heartedly and see beyond your deafness.


It's well bro

thanks for your encouraging words bro,and the advice also.

2dice:
Op U tell Girls of 18- 22years u want to marry Her?
That is a GrandTicket to de ZONE
Anyways don't let your diasbility hold you down
It is well Bro

bro why na,ain't gals of such age range matured enough for dating?,this particular gal is 19+ so she should be ripe enough for marriage in 3 years time.

Kayoski:

I don't really know what to say..but from what u've said I think u have an advantage..at least she knows ur challenge.. why not visit your aunts shop more often..try to be friends with her first,with that If u still like her after knowing her better just naturally woo her..

noted bro,I have thought about faking an illness or just a headache to visit my aunt shop for prescription but I hardly have an idea of whether my aunt will be in shop or not,so I backed off. The few time I really need drugs and visit her shop,she was always present.

Olayinka8793:
bro why na,ain't gals of such age range matured enough for dating?,this particular gal is 19+ so she should be ripe enough for marriage in 3 years time.

well u seem like a GoodGuy
Yes they are mature for dating
Most girls from that range don't even think of marriage
Na their Prime Be that .. Their eyes still dey outside also most will still be in School
No pls don't say i want to MARRY YOU...
Lastly becareful of your Heart some girls dey carry Sledge Hammer about

2dice:
well u seem like a GoodGuy
Yes they are mature for dating
Most girls from that range don't even think of marriage
Na their Prime Be that .. Their eyes still dey outside also most will still be in School
No pls don't say i want to MARRY YOU...
Lastly becareful of your Heart some girls dey carry Sledge Hammer about

noted,I had thought about replacing "I want to marry u" with "can we be friends" but my mind told me that is an automatic ticket to getting friendzoned.

Olayinka8793:
noted,I had thought about replacing "I want to marry u" with "can we be friends" but my mind told me that is an automatic ticket to getting friendzoned.

u don't even need much grammar/English diss days
Let her know u like her without being too forward
If she likes you ...everything u do will look perfect

2dice:
u don't even need much grammar/English diss days
Let her know u like her without being too forward
If she likes you ...everything u do will look perfect

ok bro,thanks for your incomplete advice sha.
*rehearsing*
hey baby what is ur name
my name is.............
I like u,I mean I fell in like with u
she :meaning?
Me: *speechless*



if she embarrassed me I will blame u bro.

Kk

Sorry, I aint gat the time to read anything this lengthy. Try again later.

Eeyah

[color=#550000][/color]ghh

So you no get liver

Ok