left Nigeria long ago but, still feels like home when I come Online and connect with Nigerian blogs like wives connection and a few others. can you please help me post my little challenge with my adult son on the blog for advise? Three years ago, my then 25 year old son met a girl, 23, and "fell in lust" here in the US .....unknown to me and my husband at the time, she was already married
somewhere. She met our son and had to have him and left her husband. We found out later that prior to her first marriage, she had been engaged in a different State but the man walked out on her before the wedding.


She rebounded immediately and married the second guy who perhaps was somewhere or secretly in the picture. Not long after their wedding, she met my son and quickly left her wedded husband for him.
My lovely son's whole wonderful personality changed upon meeting her. He started lying to us just to protect her and we didn't even realize at the time that those were lies.....but, things just didn't feel right. Ok, later, we found out about all the lies. Once, we found out, she turned on us and convinced him to leave home and relinguish all contact with his past and start a new life with her, which he cowishly did.
Her divorce was finalized in March, 2013 and they married August, 2013....she got pregnant in October and now about 2 years later, they have two kids (Twin) and we have not seen our son in all these years and I was able to talk to him just last year 2015, but that's been it.
He has had some friends and a couple family members try and contact him but he isn't allowed to accept the phone calls at all, I have never seen this kind of thing. If we were back home in Nigeria, we would have concluded she used juju or cast a spell on him. Once he tells her about the calls from other people or friends trying to reach out to him, she returns the calls herself and cusses them out saying they want nothing to do with his past and that she is the best thing that ever happened to him and his past is "dead".



In this short period of time, they have moved 3 times because of jobs. I finally got the nerve to call his past employer and they said he was going to be terminated so he left for another job. When I asked why? they implied his wife was the main reason. My son was a Youth Minister of Music in churches over here. Evidently, her jealously caused problems and she told people stuff and he had to go lie to cover up for her. I asked the church pastor if I should be a concerned mother for my son's emotional welfare. The pastor's wife emphatically told me that if she was his mother, she would be a very concerned mother.
Bottom line now is, his dad and I haven't seen him in about 3 years and don't want to do anything to wreck his marriage but we are worried sick about his mental well being. His actions to us; moving with a woman who was still legally married, getting married to her after the divorce, inability to keep a job and all the lies upon lies to cover up for and protect his wife, it's just too much for his well being.
We are made to understand he was in counseling at his past church but according to the story, his wife made him quit because she didn't like what he was hearing.



Is there anything I should be doing or should I stay out of it? My husband thinks I will need to wait until he
http://www.wivestownhallconnection.com/2016/03/we-are-worried-about-my-son-and-his.html

When u fight love it becomes stronger, stay out if it and pray for him

Ordinary p**** dey turn this one head

If he can't control his wife, how is he able to make a decision to stay away from his family and keep his children away from their grandparents for years?

Perhaps she's vocally expressing what your son wants but can't express himself?

Is there some family dynamics that should be addressed?

I think you should be concerned about his seemingly terrible life choices.

Something is not right.