Sometimes it looks to me like reducing women to a mere commodity.

I know this is a tradition handed over to us by our ancestors
but then so many things they gave us was not good for us and we dropped them.
Now before you jump all over me,
i am not saying its a bad thing
but i see it as paying for a woman since its not the same in the western world.
We dont have to emulate them though
but in some places the bride prizes are high that it discourages poor people to marry from there.

What do you think about this bride prize of a thing ?

If they wanna keep the tradition, they shd drop the cost to almost nothing and just make it a tradition.

bride prize Bride Price

It means a legal way of selling people for slavery.

mama-gee:

It means a legal way of selling people for slavery.

Yes Exactly, but why not revert to the olden ways, where you can just marry a woman for being , humble, strong, honest, etc,

@ Poster please go back to the topic and change the topic to read 'Bride Price' - that's very important.

I think paying of bride price is good but it has to be reasonable. In Nnewi the official amount was reduced several years ago to N60.00. Most people would ignore it but there is a trend that started about 10 years ago that is wonderful: u present your prospective father-in-law with any amount you think is good; he thanks u, takes N100.00 (as the symbolic bride price) from it and hands over the rest to u.

I think the reason Igbo marriages seem to last longer than most other marriages in Nig and the world is because of the bride price and other ceremonies that accompany marriage. When a man remembers the trouble he passed thro to get his wife, he thinks twice before deciding to send her home and marry a new wife. And in Igboland it is increasingly becoming shameful and out-dated for a man to marry two wives or divorce his wife and marry another.

But I think each family, village and town should vociferously talk about making it as cheap and as simple as possible to marry. When it becomes too expensive and rigorous, marriage loses the joy that should go with it.

JProspero:

@ Poster please go back to the topic and change the topic to read 'Bride Price' - that's very important.

I think paying of bride price is good but it has to be reasonable. In Nnewi the official amount was reduced several years ago to N60.00. Most people would ignore it but there is a trend that started about 10 years ago that is wonderful: u present your prospective father-in-law with any amount you think is good; he thanks u, takes N100.00 (as the symbolic bride price) from it and hands over the rest to u.

I think the reason Igbo marriages seem to last longer than most other marriages in Nig and the world is because of the bride price and other ceremonies that accompany marriage. When a man remembers the trouble he passed thro to get his wife, he thinks twice before deciding to send her home and marry a new wife. And in Igboland it is increasingly becoming shameful and out-dated for a man to marry two wives or divorce his wife and marry another.

But I think each family, village and town should vociferously talk about making it as cheap and as simple as possible to marry. When it becomes too expensive and rigorous, marriage loses the joy that should go with it.

Good point but Nnewi IS just 0.02 percent of Nigeria,

JProspero:


I think the reason Igbo marriages seem to last longer than most other marriages in Nig and the world is because of the bride price and other ceremonies that accompany marriage. When a man remembers the trouble he passed thro to get his wife, he thinks twice before deciding to send her home and marry a new wife. And in Igboland it is increasingly becoming shameful and out-dated for a man to marry two wives or divorce his wife and marry another.

i'd rather have a man choose to stay with me, despite having spent little or nothing to get me, because of love. than have a man stay with me because he has invested so much time and money. i agree with you though that igbo marriages seem to be better than other nigerian ones. i think it's because igbo men respect & treat their wives better than other guys. but then, they probably do that because of the bride prices they paid.

i think we should do away with bride prices, or ask for something other than money that isn't expensive. i heard that there's a yoruba town where they charge according to the girl's level of education. PhD holders attract the highest sum of about 8,000 naira. i think that's very reasonable, except the idea that an educated girl is worth more than the uneducated one isn't good.