I couldn't find my luggage at the airport baggage area so I went to the lost luggage office and told the woman there that my bags never showed up. She smiled and told me not to worry because she was a trained professional and I was in good hands. "Now" she asked me "has your plane arrived yet?"


One day I was walking down the beach with some friends when one of them shouted "Look at that dead bird!" Someone looked up at the sky and said "Where?"


A mother calls 911 very worried asking the dispatcher if she needs to take her kid to the emergency room - the kid had eaten ants. The dispatcher tells her to give the kid some cough medicine and he should be fine. The mother says "I just gave him some ant killer...." Dispatcher: "Rush him in to emergency!"


A woman at work was seen putting a credit card into her floppy drive and pulling it out very quickly. When I inquired as to what she was doing she said she was shopping on the internet and they kept asking for a credit card number, so she was using the ATM thingy.

Nice!

choi............u cracked my belly open