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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Why Am I Greatly Bothered By Certain Forms Of Criticism? (3225 Views)
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Re: Why Am I Greatly Bothered By Certain Forms Of Criticism? by Nobody: 1:48am On Jan 01, 2008 |
Sorry for blowing up in my earlier post, I do not know how to use soothing words. When things bother us, some of us release our emotions on others. You have to surround yourself with positive people. Because of the lack of support from your family and their undeniable criticisms you find fault in everything. You have to deal with the problems in your family by initiating a sincere conversation with them and telling them how you feel. I'm also in a position where I need a breathing space from my parents. It's not very easy to tell your family how you feel about certain things but try. Do you know what I think when I am alone? I think who/what gave you the idea to come up with something like nairaland. And now you make nairaland sound like an under achievement whereas I've not achieved anything in my life yet. You really need to take a break, cool down, take a deep breath and relieve yourself of stress. |
Re: Why Am I Greatly Bothered By Certain Forms Of Criticism? by Nobody: 2:03am On Jan 01, 2008 |
If i had a website like Nairaland i wouldnt give 2 shakes of a ducks tail whether my family supports it or not. You dont need to be appreciated to know your true value. Chin up and grab life by the scruff of the neck. A man lives and dies by his actions not what others think of him. |
Re: Why Am I Greatly Bothered By Certain Forms Of Criticism? by kobe(m): 2:11am On Jan 01, 2008 |
@ Kobe it's just stark hypocrisy not to practcie what you preach. Have you ever heard the saying action speaks louder than words, what's the use of going around telling someone how to live their life when your's is in the same mess. Tell that to those who report celebs in tabloids. Ask many of them if they live their lives any differently. Besides, just the other day I overheard a co-worker telling her daughter not to smoke, even though she (the mom) is a heavy smoker. Are you insinuating she shouldn't, because she doesn't practice what she's preaching? Excuse me for deviating off topic. I agree with you, that it would be best for those who preach it to practice it, but life often doesn't work ideally. |
Re: Why Am I Greatly Bothered By Certain Forms Of Criticism? by wendymanda: 2:24am On Jan 01, 2008 |
Tell that to those who report celebs in tabloids. Ask many of them if they live their lives any differently. Am not saying people don't try to criticize and change people on things they are not better at. What am saying is that it's hypocritical, how can the mother be shocked that her daughter is smoking. Am not insinuating that the mother should not dissuade her daughter from smoking but it's quite stupid to expect her daughter to stop but for the mother not to. Are you insinuating that the Nigerian government should try to stop Nigerian scammers and continuously steal from the Nigerian people? |
Re: Why Am I Greatly Bothered By Certain Forms Of Criticism? by kobe(m): 4:30am On Jan 01, 2008 |
It doesn't have to be hypocritical. You don’t have to practice what you preach, if you know that someone is doing something wrong. The fact that you can’t do it yourself, doesn’t mean he/she should suffer. Your advice, how ever little, is enough to urge the other person to change. It would be more ideal if people in general removed the chaff from their eyes, before attempting to remove the splint in the eyes of others. But, as I mentioned earlier it's life. Don't let it bother you to a point where it becomes discouraging or depressing. |
Re: Why Am I Greatly Bothered By Certain Forms Of Criticism? by wendymanda: 6:14am On Jan 01, 2008 |
It would be more ideal if people in general removed the chaff from their eyes, before attempting to remove the splint in the eyes of others. This is the exact thing am saying, you have to start making changes within yourself before you try to convince others to make changes. Thus it is hypocritical to remove the splint in the eyes of othersbefore removing the chaff from your eyes. |
Re: Why Am I Greatly Bothered By Certain Forms Of Criticism? by kobe(m): 6:48am On Jan 01, 2008 |
I will agree it is hypocritical on the condition that they boast to be better than you. If not, fear of hypercriticism should not be a delimiter that prevents people from criticizing others. If we were to attempt to be virtuous and begin refraining from being hypercritical, pastors would refrain from preaching on a certain topic, because they haven't yet attended to that aspect of their lives yet. No matter how harsh it may seem, or how unethical, or how uncharacteristic, it is good to correct others, or to point out their mischiefs if you see any (criticism or not, as long as it's not violent). If you (the critiqued) paint it colorful, it makes you a stronger, better person. Just don't let it drag you down. |
Re: Why Am I Greatly Bothered By Certain Forms Of Criticism? by mrpataki(m): 9:16pm On Jan 03, 2008 |
This is what is called the celebrititis disease. ![]() |
Re: Why Am I Greatly Bothered By Certain Forms Of Criticism? by Seun(m): 9:51pm On Jan 03, 2008 |
You guys are great. I feel encouraged. Thanks. |
Re: Why Am I Greatly Bothered By Certain Forms Of Criticism? by WesleyanA(f): 10:36am On Jan 22, 2008 |
Yeah criticism can hurt sometimes. especially when it's coming from family or close friend. it also depends on what type of criticism though. like the untidy room comment. I would get upset if a stranger made that comment to me but would laugh if it was a friend and even ask him/her to help me tidy it up or something (he came to you for a favor right?) I think you should learn to care less of other people's opinions (you probably care too much). I don't know but I tend to filter out positive comments and discard negative ones. I even convince myself that the haters are idiots. well they are. lol they're not worth loosing time and energy over. In case of your parents though (yeah. I remember you had problems with them from 2 years ago i think) If they can't accept their child for who he/she is, then i guess it's their problem (no offense). They should be proud of you if they know your accomplishments (esp. with Nairaland) but sometimes one has to live for oneself rather than for their parents. There are many people who live unhappy lives because their parents chose it for them (decided for them what school to go to, what type of degree to get, when to graduate, what type of person to marry etc). If your parents criticize you for not doing what you feel is best for you. Or at least sympathize even if they feel you're wrong, then i don't know, but you shouldn't stress it. surround yourself with positive people (like stillwater said) who understand your feelings, wishes and respect them. they may do things you don't like once in a while but thats normal because there are times they also will feel offended by you. but just make sure that overall, they are good friends. one disagreement should ruin a good relationship. yeah i think you're a pretty sensitive person but better sensitive than cold-hearted. |
Re: Why Am I Greatly Bothered By Certain Forms Of Criticism? by WesleyanA(f): 10:50am On Jan 22, 2008 |
positive affirmation is what you need. I do agree that people criticize you A LOT. even though you don't deserve the criticisms considering your accomplishments.I don't see as much "well done" or "good job" comments some people tend to to better when they are commended. while others perform better when they're criticized. ![]() people have different personalities i guess |
Re: Why Am I Greatly Bothered By Certain Forms Of Criticism? by tenik: 4:01pm On Apr 21, 2008 |
@seun, it happens to everyone, criticism? For me , it gives me strength, to know my fault and do better But remember not all critics are to be measured some people just love to get you angry and some just wanna find a weakness even though the truth is that everyone has a weakness Seun just brace up, and bout the degree and bla bla bla, We all have a right to our choices in life and having a degree is not the end of the world Afterall the greatest successful people in the world didnt go to school What matters is who you really are, And what you have on your inside keep doing wat u love to do acquire all the knowlegde u can get Yeah its good to listen sometimes and learn Follow ur intuition Be strong for yourself And hey just pray Life is good! ALL THE BEST BUDDIE! |
Re: Why Am I Greatly Bothered By Certain Forms Of Criticism? by Nobody: 5:05pm On Nov 23, 2013 |
@op, ur kinda sissy and u whine alot, are u perharps gay? |
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