frank3.16:


I am not defendin bad thing, neither am I saying cheatin on ones partner is right, I am just stating the obvious. Men can love u and cheat on u, to them sex is not love, but to women the feel sex comes wit love.

Few women who know this fact make better wives and concentrate on more important things that makes marriage work. If ur husband is keeping a woman, caring for her and stuffs like that, and cares less for u, thhen that's another story.

If u say a man can't love and cheat his wife what then do say to about 90% of men who cheat on their wives. U mean they don't love their wives? Oh forget about vows, it has become formality over time.

I love my woman but have cheated on her a couple of times, bt she is alway my number one.

deniyor: It's possible for a man to love and still cheat. Its just the way they are wired and a result of their upbringing/environment.
The one thing he lacks is real respect for you, and you have to fight for it.
If you weren't married, i would have said leave his sorry arse till he comes to his senses. But you are married so maybe a break from marriage then? Tell him you understand that he likes all the extra pusssies, you want to go enjoy all the other dycks you possible can too. Two can play that game. No need to really do it but if feels the threat is real, it will get to him.
Let him know the next time you catch him or just suspect anything at all, his friends or neighbours will be getting a free ride. And you will divorce him after that and go for everything he's got (that inky works outside of naija though).
Good luck you deserve the best.

omosexy1: @deniyor try to understand frank. A woman will cheat when she finds a reason, a man will cheat without any reason. I always tell the female folks, try and understand d mind set of a man and you will have a happy home. Well it is also important for men to understand that it hurts women when they cheat (I believe open communication on this between spouse may reduce the cheating rate) but not by threat or violence.

Deniyor, I do not know your gender, but if you are a man you should ask your self why do you have the urge to want to sleep with several women. Whether you deny it or not, it is not a theory but now a FACT. So women should know that they are still in constant competition with other women over their man, regardless of being married or not. Rather than threaten, express understanding and love. At some point, a man would get tired of his sports.

frank3.16:


Oga pls stop makin statements u are not sure of. A man can love u and still cheat on u.

Like I said in a previous post men have sexx with women (including their wives or girlfriends) not because they loce them but because they want to satisfy their hunger For sexx, and therefore it can come in differnt veraities, but men marry u, care for u, buy u gifts etc because they love u. But women cheat with their emotions hence the story is different.

@poster, find a way to let him know he is hurting u. U must have evidenec that he is cheatin on u, do this smartly and let him know it hurts his reaction will tell u he loves u or not. Bt I still think he loves u and u know it, hold that one first, it is more important.

deniyor: One more thing i missed earlier.
Why is your hubby cheating on you? Are you satisfying him in bed? You don't seem to be able to keep up with his libido. A very satisfied man won't really have the strength or stamina to go out.
Are you connecting with him emotionally? Cos that is a reason most men go out of the relationships.
Are you sure you are rocking is world. Don't just answer yes, consider it deeply. And if in doubt, ask him to be frank with you.

tracyxx: How can he be bored when we are full of fun. Please cheating should never be normal,its only africans that believe cheating is normal.

tracyxx: He is a superman ohhhhh!he once told me he can never be satisfied and he had slept with over 200 girls b4 we got married.I taught maybe after marriage he will stop.

deniyor: This is not about married folks but about you. As a self confessed cheat, I'm directing my questions at you.
When a woman cheat and has no emotional attachment to the guy, you are quick to brand her a slut, ashewo,sx addict. What about men who cheat? Are they sluts too? Would you describe them in a degrading manner like you did the ladies? Would be refer to those men as scum of the earth? Would you call your self the same?
If your intention is to make the women learn the handle and understand the fact that we men cheat, have you considered that maybe we men should ALSO learn to understand that women love sexx too and may want to get it outside with no strings attached.
Maybe you should start preparing your mind that your woman is running her own side show. If that is the case, remember she loves you and you are her no1, the other guy is just sexx.
Just cos everyone does it don't make it right. Let's learn to consider the other persons feelings and not force them in accepting whatever b.s. we throw at them cos they are sometimes too weak to fight for themselves.
PS frank, i hope you don't consider my points personal. That's not the intention.

tracyxx: you are really on point,seriously I have to gain my respect back and the best really I deserve

deniyor:

Now that is your first fault, you have a lower libido than him and you still went ahead. But that's done. You will have to step up your game. Figure how many times he wants it in a day and give it to him.200 before marriage is really nothing. With the right game and time, any dude can be that prolific. Call him superman when he sleeps with 200 women in one day.
Bring back the fun and excitement into your sex life. You can do it, it won't be that easy at first, but it gets better. There are tunes you won't be in the mood but there are other maneuvers you can perform.
Become the goddess of sex herself and see if you have any rival after that.
For motivation, remember if a guy keeps on fking the same girl all the time, he starts developing some serious attachments. That can go either way for you.

deniyor: Frank, i have met women who do not have any form of attachment to cheating whatsoever. I mean I even felt bad whike the girls couldn't give a shit. Some of them just like the thrill of one night stand. Absolutely no attachment. How is that any different from guys? And it is not even a oyinbo thing. My point is according to your argument, it should be okay for them too like it is for guys.
PS cheating women is not new thing either.Read your bible.
No need to focus on American value system.Your so called family system is also thrash in Nigeria. That's another discussion for another time.

Many women attach emotions to sexx but we also have many who don't. Many others just use it as a means to an end eg marriage, money, power, fun etc. I can't stand a cheating woman but it's time we start holding our men to the same standard as we do women.

tracyxx: He is a superman ohhhhh!he once told me he can never be satisfied and he had slept with over 200 girls b4 we got married.I taught maybe after marriage he will stop.

Mynd_44:
He told you that and you thought he would change? A guy confesses that he will cheat on you and the best you can come up with is that he will change after marriage? What is wrong with these people?

deniyor: The world is going too crazy for me mehn! Someone whose user name means itchy prick is quoting the bible. Damn

Okontami: @Postern the Bible says love you husband as Christ loves the church. He gave his life for us and loved us un conditionally. So what you should focus on if you are a true christain is the Lord's commandment. Will you cheat on him and ignore your marriage vows and be condemed to hell fire? Your regrets will only startif you try this. You will never be able to forgive your self if he continues to show you more love. You will hate your self on this. My church member was in this your shoes and she took the wrong advice, cheated on his husband and all hell let's loose. She became more miserable. Its your duty to pray along with your husband. The world is becoming devilsh and that's why all these are happening. Take it to the Lord in prayers and you will testify to God that there is nothing God can not do. He is able and very much abundantly able to deliver those who trust in him.This is my little advice from my life experience.

deniyor: Omosexy, I'm not saying i don't understand Frank. I understand him very well... too well maybe. I just happen to disagree with you both.
In reality, no body needs a reason to cheat. Your hormones should be enough.
If you couldn't tell from my posts, I'm a full blooded guy. And to answer your unpacked question - yes i have cheated many times before on gfs. I used to believe i was gods gift to women and the fact that i got game i should use it to add to my trophy list. And yes, i still desire other women sometimes.

But that is the past. I have grown older and hopefully wiser. I have learnt lessons in life too. Still do.
The only reason men cheat is because they know they can get away with it. Because they know you ladies will just accept it as a man's weakness. Because you are more interested in keeping that particular man for various reasons you are willing to turn a blind eye on his actions.

You think men can't curb their sexual desires? You have been fooled to think they can. Yes we enjoy the thrills but we have the ability to take control from our other brain if we really choose to.

Why don't men knowingly sleep with ladies with HIV no matter how Hot they are? Why don't they sleep with a woman if they know there is magun on her? Hypothethically, if a man knows that overtime he cheats someone close to him will die, will he do it? Or if he knows he will die if he does it!
Men cheat because they know they can get away with it.End of story.
Try this, open lines of communications with tor gut and say "I understand you are a man and you looked to get it outside too.I'm a woman and I don't mind the experience of other guys too. So I'm okay with you cheating as long as it is okay for me to cheat.Tell him if he cheats outside of that agreement, you wool cheat back on him secretly too.
Or leave his cheating zzz.HE WILL LEARN!
If u start accepting it, then he will do it whether it hurts or not.If he is dressing up for those girls, you too dress up, look hot and desirablefit the other guys. Trust me he will be too busy keeping off other guys from you than to have time adding other ladies to his trophy cabinet.

tracyxx: Godbless you 4 dis advice, I no I can never cheat on him nt only because of the love I have 4 him but also because of my faith

pc guru:

i was going to type how deluded people are to understand that men can't control their desire to cheat saying men are like that first of all we are not all like that i ave never cheated in a relationship because that's the way i am besides this poster's response is a superb comment, frank's response too me sounds like an excuse for an action. people cheat because they are selfish and know they can get away with it.

pc guru: ^ sorry if it sounded like an attack, its just that am surrounded by people who praise other for cheating, and to me it makes no sense at all. i re-read your post and got your point now, i misinterpreted your post. but seriously Self-Control is not hard to achieve its all in the mind the reason i don't cheat is because i was ill and shared a room with someone who had AIDS for 3 days, seeing what that person went through scarred me,i'd rather be a virgin and get to live a good life then risk that for a cheap thrill, besides cheating in Marriage is just sad. then why bother marrying makes no sense at all. keep it bro