IGBO GUY: Bebe, are u on BB? Ngwa give me ya pin.
FINE GIRL: But I use an iPhone.
IGBO GUY: Ehen? ngwanu nyem gimme ur I-PIN.
.................................................

Because the Weather hot, No mean say fowl go lay boiled egg!!
.............................................................

I hope you know that you don't need cutlery b4 u CHOP slap
.............................................................
Stop editing ur pics. What if u go missing? How u expect us to find you if u look like beyonce on nairaland & Iyabo in person?"
......................................................................................................................
You Know God Is Punishing You when u go 2 withdraw cash via ATM & u meet d guy U're owing on d queue
....................................................................................................
Want Nigeria to Win the 4x100 Relays? Easy................ Replace the Baton with GALA and park a DANFO at the Finish Line!!!
......................................................................................................................
Nigeria A place Where someone wld mistakenly hit you in a crowd and the next thing is for you to check ur "penis" if it's still there!
......................................................................................................................
FRUITS BRAGGING APPLE: l look like human heart. MANGO: I look like a stomach GRAPE: I look like eyes. BANANA: pls pls pls change d topic
......................................................................................................................
don't talk to me about pain if you've never thrown your #450 change out the window instead of the gala wrapper.
.....................................................................................................................
Husbnd buys 12 of d same-colour of pants 4his wife: Wife protests Ah! same colour? pple wil thnk i dnt chnge my panties" Husbnd: Which pple?
.....................................................................................................................
Money Can Only Impress Girls that Are Broke/Lazy.
.....................................................................................................................
SHOUTOUT to those that will drop empty offering envelope in church today... God will bless your hustle.

;Dtry hot oil in its mouth .it will lay fried egg

hahahahahahahahaha

nyc piece, u try jor

Great

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahhahahhahahahahhahahhahah laugh make me no save de number I just collected from a new girl. Ohh. . . . . .Nice joke, Me likey.

REWARD: SHITT THREE TIMES IN MY PUBLIC TOILET BUT PLS DONT FART O O.

Vote for Jojo Armani for Vice President (VP) Projan.

Jojo Armani: Hahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahhahahhahahahahhahahhahah laugh make me no save de number I just collected from a new girl. Ohh. . . . . .Nice joke, Me likey.

REWARD: SHITT THREE TIMES IN MY PUBLIC TOILET BUT PLS DONT FART O O.

Vote for Jojo Armani for Vice President (VP) Projan.

I go vote for you

but remember

VOTE FOR LARRIDE AS THE NEXT PRESIDENT OF PROJAN

Harrison, a tall well built good looking young man has something all women cherish in a man (hugh privates,almost extending to his knee) but there seems to be a very big problem preventing him from getting even 1 single lady(as nigerians would say) . HIS VOICE, as tiny as the first string of a guitar. one day he decides to see a doctor as his situation gets unbearable.

AT THE DOCTOR'S OFFICE

HARRISON: with his tiny voice to the doctor) i need help sir,the nature of my voice prevents me from having ladies around me not to talk of having an affair.

DOCTOR: (flabbergasted) this is serious! come closer let me examine you.
('harrison moves forward as the doctor begins to examine him')

DOCTOR: JESUS WEPT! did you ever discover that your privates is so hugh that it pulls your voice cord? the only solution to this problem is an operation to reduce it's size which could commence anytime you want.

HARRISON: (tiny voice) please. let it commence right away i can't wait.
('the operation was successful, his dignity as a man is restored to normal(his voice). he thanks the doctor and leaves hurriedly for action)

two weeks later: he returns to the doctor's

HARRISON: (with a normal man's voice) i can't understand whatz going on.the women are now telling that my privates is damn too tiny for my size and that it's is better off the way it was.(he asks with a funny look) now doctor tell me, is the process reversible?

DOCTOR: (TINY VOICE) NO!

Ehyah. .you actually stole this tweets from @SeyiLawComedy on twitter

Nice one tho

I am Mormoni general secretary PROJAN