So, skin aging = maturity?

**shudders****

At 22 she barely learn anything about life.

Bro you bad self, why did you rush the girl now?

OYINBOGOJU: At 22 she barely learn anything about life.

Bro you bad self, why did you rush the girl now?

He used his "Money" to snatch her from her Boyfriends. Now the boyfriends are probably knacking her and they are spending his money with wifey. lol. A 22yr old barely knows what she wants. And if you fall short in anyway from her fantasy, bro you are in deep shite. They still live in fantasy world at that age, and cant grasp the idea of what you are trying to make her live up to.

Kobojunkie: So, skin aging = maturity?

**shudders****

I suspect the above is a subliminal to my post. Please don't get it twisted, I wrote that post as a rejoinder to 2mch own.
or maybe i am just being paranoid

Dude,infidelity in marriage no b "beans".IMO,send her back to her folks,let them talk some sense into her head. or send an email to customerservice@cheaters.com , consider separation 4 awhile

i do know that if the man tries to loudly put his feet down and force her to respect him and the marriage like peeps are advising,he would only be pushing her out..
The situation might become worse as she might become rebellious...
The poster is in for a long ride of patience until his big baby wife fully understands the reality of her situation.

^^ Anyone suggesting he "put his foot down", has probably never been in a good relationship before. Cause the minute you start doing that, the dynamics of the relationship starts to change . . . love slowly goes out the door and something else shows up. That is why when you have a 'Lord and Servant" relationship between a man and woman, it is hard to classify it as a relationship built on love. It is something else but.

slimyem: until his wife fully understands the reality of her situation.

Lol You make it sound so grim.

ileobatojo:

Lol You make it sound so grim.

i didn't mean to...
I can only imagine the babe in a world of her own right now giggling away on her phone right beside her husband .She might not even get what the man is getting riled up about......

slimyem: i didn't mean to...
I can only imagine the babe in a world of her own right now giggling away on her phone right beside her husband .She might not even get what the man is getting riled up about......

Forgive me but I had to laugh, hahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa @ she may not get what the man is "stressing over", Very true, her world now is one of "too go", "BB Chat", she really wouldnt get it that she is a wife and a mother now. Things should be done at the right time and stage. I am sure the farthest she thought about marriage was the wedding day, her long gown tiara and flowers, she didnt think beyond that, she is back to her world of "loling" and writing in short codes, while brother baby bride husband is dying in pain. Did you explain to this girl the implication of marriage before marrying her or you just promised her the world?

I don' think he really should be up in arms. For all we know she could be talking to guys, and gals, she went to high school with or grew up with. With time she may probably get over all that but the husband needs to be patient with her. Involving her parents, I am not sure how that will help make the situation better . .might cause her to resent him. I mean this is a gal who is young and probably not over the 'rebellious' phase of her youth, and she probably does not clearly comprehend the boundaries that should exist in marriage.

slimyem:
I can only imagine the babe in a world of her own right now giggling away on her phone right beside her husband .She might not even get what the man is getting riled up about......

Lol!! You know, you may be right, it would be odd for her to want to s*x up 3 different exes wouldn't it? Blatantly in front of her hubby too? She probably is just naive about these matters and considers herself open minded and free with people. She may truly see no problem with remaining good friends with these guys and there may not be too much wrong with that (as long as all things remain at s.t.p sha o). OP, I would suggest talking to her, find out about her past relationships with these guys, how they ended etc. Don't be judgmental in your approach. If you don't identify any red flags then just let her know you feel uncomfortable with her frequent calls to them and especially disrespected by those night time calls. Tell her to cut back on the frequency of the calls out of love and respect for you.

If it happens to be that she's just not that into you and is getting something from them that she's not getting from you, then there's problem. All I can say in that case is sorry.

Wait self, why are people tearing pant over this matter? If na woman bring this case no matter how old the man is we will say "he is a baby, pet him, lose weight, be more attractive" "are you sure you are giving him enough boobi? A man satisfied will not look for food outside. . Why are some people breaking bottle now because it is on the other foot?
Poster are you sure you are doing it right in bed? Loose some weight, wear new and sexy underwear

2mch:

He used his "Money" to snatch her from her Boyfriends. Now the boyfriends are probably knacking her and they are spending his money with wifey. lol. A 22yr old barely knows what she wants. And if you fall short in anyway from her fantasy, bro you are in deep shite. They still live in fantasy world at that age, and cant grasp the idea of what you are trying to make her live up to.

No one said it better than you.

Things don backfire

Bro sorry ooo, money can't buy everything.

@Debrief

Will you please stop thinking everybody means violence even when they don't? My response to the post lies in there and if you search harder you will find it.

Shuushhh

jennykadry: @Debrief

Will you please stop thinking everybody means violence even when they don't? My response to the post lies in there and if you search harder you will find it.

Shuushhh

You don enjoy the whole day na now you come get my time. Okay oh, I don hear, was actually thinking you were being sarcastic but i wasnt sure.

@Poster

Its people like you that are making our ladies at 28,29 even 30 years of age still single.

I guess you know better now.

@debrief

^ How many times have I used that word "slap" in my post in situations like this? How many of the cabal members have replied the way you did? I guess some of them know me better.

@Topic
Drag that woman to her fathers house with her Ghana must go, let her go and tell them what she has done with her own mouth.

Silly girl

jennykadry: @debrief

^ How many times have I used that word "slap" in my post in situations like this? How many of the cabal members have replied the way you did? I guess some of them know me better.

@Topic
Drag that woman to her fathers house with her Ghana must go, let her go and tell them what she has done with her own mouth.

Silly girl

Ma bi nu jor, other cabal members are not as kpepus starved as I am. No vex jor. This one that you are just coming in now, hmmmmmmmmmmmm. God dey sha

@ poster, I'm sorry but I do have to say this. For a 31 year old, you do sound quite silly - yapping on & on about your wife's ex's.

You do know the meaning of the word ex don't you? It means past, done with, finished! Your wife has no business conducting shady midnight calls with any of them, let alone 3. Or you wan wait till she's got a dozen men running after her like a dog in heat? How do you do it sef? You just lie back in bed listening to her flirt away on the phone, till the wee hours of the morning??

Since she hasn't got it through her wooly head that past lovers / toasters or whatever should remain solidly in the past, then YOU should take control, steer your martial ship back on track before it gets blown off course.

Now, don't get me wrong here. I'm not advocating violence of any kind here. No.
What you need to do is sit her firmly down and let her know how much this is affecting you. Make her understand that she risks destroying her marriage if she persists. Also, when next any of those her ex's call, take the phone and start by telling them you're her husband. Ask them what they want from your wife. Then warn them to stay away and NEVER call her number again! Haba, you're the head of your home! Or are you afraid to warn them off??

Then YOU need to let that wife of yours know that her actions are planting seeds of doubt in you regarding her faithfulness to you, and her commitment to your marriage. Ask her how she would feel if you had your ex's start calling you up in the middle of the night too. Or does she want you to start fooling around / cheating on her?

There is only so much we as humans can tolerate before reaching breaking point. A wise woman they say, builds up her home. Only a f00lish woman uses her hands to destroy her home.

Why is everyone blaming him for the age thing.she is probably taking the husband's love and calm nature for granted.my husband is 9yrs older than me,so the OP must not marry a 28-30 yr old girl to make his marriage work.when i got married their were some things i was doing my husband didnt like,he was always giving me a kiss telling me he knows i would change,but when the change wasnt forth coming,he rained hell on me that day,i was so suprised.The message got to me and since then i stopped.

The lady is not too young for marriage. She is just being silly.OP is an enabler instead of talking to his wife he is busy frowning around the house and maybe there is something you do to her and she is using this phone calls to get back at you. She isn't as foolish as you think.

A woman is busy destroying her marital home and we are telling the husband to be patient! Will you advice your married son that way? A man that is hurting. Patient till when? eternity?

Also see insult on 22 year old ladies, I suspect it is probably your sisters/cousins that you relate to that made most of you have this very silly idea of 22 year old ladies as overgrown teenagers.

A 22 year old is not immature, That girl if you don't curb her excesses will still be the same at 32 so please it is not about age, that one is just a very stupid girl.

Look oko iyawo, stop playing this cat and mouse game with her, why should you be changing her sim card, why should you be the one forcing the change. Marriage is never 50.50 balanced at all times however the imbalance in yours is too much.

She needs people to counsel her on what been a mother and wife is all about and that has to be her family that should have trained her properly in the first place.

andromida: The lady is not too young for marriage. She is just being silly.OP is an enabler instead of talking to his wife he is busy frowning around the house and maybe there is something you do to her and she is using this phone calls to get back at you. She isn't as foolish as you think.

A 14 year old is not too young for marriage, but that don't mean it is right to marry a 14 year old. People mature at different rates. Some people don't mature until their 50's. If one bases one's choice in marriage on age, then one is sure to run into problems such as this and many others . If one basis it on maturity, then one is more likely to avoid a lot of problems.

Mrs mansson: Why is everyone blaming him for the age thing.she is probably taking the husband's love and calm nature for granted.my husband is 9yrs older than me,so the OP must not marry a 28-30 yr old girl to make his marriage work.when i got married their were some things i was doing my husband didnt like,he was always giving me a kiss telling me he knows i would change,but when the change wasnt forth coming,he rained hell on me that day,i was so suprised.The message got to me and since then i stopped.

Thank you.
I just wonder why its so hard for these wussies to understand this very idea.

vanitty: A woman is busy destroying her marital home and we are telling the husband to be patient! Will you advice your married son that way? A man that is hurting. Patient till when? eternity?

Also see insult on 22 year old ladies, I suspect it is probably your sisters/cousins that you relate to that made most of you have this very silly idea of 22 year old ladies as overgrown teenagers.

A 22 year old is not immature, That girl if you don't curb her excesses will still be the same at 32 so please it is not about age, that one is just a very stupid girl.

Look oko iyawo, stop playing this cat and mouse game with her, why should you be changing her sim card, why should you be the one forcing the change. Marriage is never 50.50 balanced at all times however the imbalance in yours is too much.

She needs people to counsel her on what been a mother and wife is all about and that has to be her family that should have trained her properly in the first place.

You hit the nail on the head.
We dont even tolerate bad behaviour from our little children, not to mention a 22yr old mother.

vanitty: A woman is busy destroying her marital home and we are telling the husband to be patient! Will you advice your married son that way? A man that is hurting. Patient till when? eternity?

Also see insult on 22 year old ladies, I suspect it is probably your sisters/cousins that you relate to that made most of you have this very silly idea of 22 year old ladies as overgrown teenagers.

A 22 year old is not immature, That girl if you don't curb her excesses will still be the same at 32 so please it is not about age, that one is just a very stupid girl.

Look oko iyawo, stop playing this cat and mouse game with her, why should you be changing her sim card, why should you be the one forcing the change. Marriage is never 50.50 balanced at all times however the imbalance in yours is too much.

She needs people to counsel her on what been a mother and wife is all about and that has to be her family that should have trained her properly in the first place.

If a man was behaving this way will you ask her to be patient or to shout on him?

plaetton:
You hit the nail on the head.
We dont even tolerate bad behaviour from our little children, not to mention a 22yr old mother.

In this case her actions show she is not clearly an adult and still not his child, even in children forcing them to do something doesnt breed respect but resentment. However, explaining to the child why you are making that rule and how it benefits him/her gives the child a better understanding, if the child fails to adhere then more stringent actions can be taken. She is not a child and not a mature adult so her case is more delicate. She is his wife, He is the more mature partner, he chose her for a wife, he knows the reason why he chose her, If he decides to start acting like a bull dig he will scare her into false respect and not respect based on love. No one is saying he should tolerate bad behavior but shouting, beating and forcing her is not the solution

debrief08:
If a man was behaving this way will you ask her to be patient or to shout on him?

In this case her actions show she is not clearly an adult and still not his child, even in children forcing them to do something doesnt breed respect but resentment. However, explaining to the child why you are making that rule and how it benefits him/her gives the child a better understanding, if the child fails to adhere then more stringent actions can be taken. She is not a child and not a mature adult so her case is more delicate. She is his wife, He is the more mature partner, he chose her for a wife, he knows the reason why he chose her, If he decides to start acting like a bull dig he will scare her into false respect and not respect based on love. No one is saying he should tolerate bad behavior but shouting, beating and forcing her is not the solution

Am sorry but your responses show a degree of either immaturity or hypocricsy. I think you are arguing just for argument sake. You are not making a lot of sense. I dont know what alternate universe you live in.

No one, not me , is suggesting that he beats her.
But Frankly speaking, after repeated warnings, I would not be able to predict what my spur of the moment response would be if she continues to show such disrespect.

If explaining things to children was all it takes to make them well behaved, then I dont think we would have any badly behaved children or any type of crimes in our society.

Even society puts its feet firmly on many no-go areas. In any human organisation, there are no-go areas that, once crossed, elicit firm reprimand or harsh punishment.
If this lady was in the work workforce or in a corporate setting, would her age be an excuse for bad behaviour?
Nonesense!


"If he starts acting like a bull, he will scare her"?
For a man to put his foot down and demand that his spouse respect him means he is acting like a bull?

For goodness sake,what the women is doing is very disrespectful,tantamount to, and could possibly lead to adultery.

This is the biggest crap I have ever heard from an adult.

You must be living in some kind of illusional world.

^^^^^
And let me add, if the reverse was the case and the man was guilty of doing same, I would still encourage the woman to raise as much hell and put her feet firmly on the ground.
So I am notbeing chauvanistic in any way.

vanitty: A woman is busy destroying her marital home and we are telling the husband to be patient! Will you advice your married son that way? A man that is hurting. Patient till when? eternity?

Also see insult on 22 year old ladies, I suspect it is probably your sisters/cousins that you relate to that made most of you have this very silly idea of 22 year old ladies as overgrown teenagers.

A 22 year old is not immature, That girl if you don't curb her excesses will still be the same at 32 so please it is not about age, that one is just a very stupid girl.

Look oko iyawo, stop playing this cat and mouse game with her, why should you be changing her sim card, why should you be the one forcing the change. Marriage is never 50.50 balanced at all times however the imbalance in yours is too much.

She needs people to counsel her on what been a mother and wife is all about and that has to be her family that should have trained her properly in the first place.

I told you the last time, that I am a fan

plaetton:

Am sorry but your responses show a degree of either immaturity or hypocricsy. I think you are arguing just for argument sake. You are not making a lot of sense. I dont know what alternate universe you live in.

No one, not me , is suggesting that he beats her.
But Frankly speaking, after repeated warnings, I would not be able to predict what my spur of the moment response would be if she continues to show such disrespect.

If explaining things to children was all it takes to make them well behaved, then I dont think we would have any badly behaved children or any type of crimes in our society.

Even society puts its feet firmly on many no-go areas. In any human organisation, there are no-go areas that, once crossed, elicit firm reprimand or harsh punishment.
If this lady was in the work workforce or in a corporate setting, would her age be an excuse for bad behaviour?
Nonesense!


"If he starts acting like a bull, he will scare her"?
For a man to put his foot down and demand that his spouse respect him means he is acting like a bull?

For goodness sake,what the women is doing is very disrespectful,tantamount to, and could possibly lead to adultery.

This is the biggest crap I have ever heard from an adult.

You must be living in some kind of illusional world.

At her age except for few fast and gifted people most are still in school, some are still trying to write Jamb, some gifted kids are delayed in school sometimes because they may not be able to cope with the level of maturity required for the next step.
secondly, most Nigerians dont "talk" or have time to explain, we beat and shout. Well we can see where beating and shouting has gotten us, high crime rates, serial rapists and killers, armed robbers with no conscience, hired assassins for as low as 30k, then we lie to our selves that we have a better society than Countries where they dont beat children for every offense. We hide most crimes, cover most violence within families and say it is "family matters" we hide rape, violent beatings and injuries because we "dont want people to hear", we get no help to damaged children raised in so much violence and pretense.
Let me say my crap, it is mine and I am entitled to it.