I recommend this book "ATTITUDE IS EVERYTHING BY KEITH HARRELL"

Just try n SING wen eva u ar angry or u rememba a funny event. Most of al leave dat environment wit a smile...

@Poster,
Posting this on this forum certainly show that you want to give up anger. try these few things, it can be of help.
1. Do not expect too much from your fiance/spouse, having the understanding that she is coming from another background and you need to train and retrain her.
2. Talk to her about what is likely to upset you and what you don't like
3. Try, just try not to utter a word when really angry, talk to her after your temper is OK
4. Read the word of God, pray very well, be involved in the service of God in your church
I hope this few tips will help.

This is one big issue for me too-ANGER.It destroys,nothing good comes from it and yet when am angry I just want to talk cos at that time I am very emotional and at the end,I begin to apologise for some of the things I might have said wrong.Reading people's comments here gives me an insight on how to deal with it.First of all,it's one of the fruits of the flesh,I have been trying my best lately,when am angry,I stay with my family,gist and laugh like there's no tomorrow or I get busy with washing,cleaning and even eating but at the point am trying to make peace,if the person who has annoyed me doen't show any sign of remorse,I get infuriated again.

ijigbamigb:
seriously, d shower idea is kool...and mixed with quietness will help alot...

Anyway just take it easy with her. Anger can be awful.
One time like that I was mad with rage at my bf, he knew I was angry yet was talkn. I swear I didn't beat him up bt almost did. Next a.m he started askn me, are u in blackbra, or u ve started smokn? I regretted...

Let's read: www.nairaland.com/872861/when-angry

Besides, anger is demonic. We need to contact God's grace through real fasting and prayer to be completely free from the demon of anger.

God bless you.
God2man.

Anger is a choice but somtimes we find ourselves bn carried away by d pressure of d moment. However, u must realise that d fruit of uncontrolable anger is shame, regret, destruction et al. U must consider d end alwayz b4 u react to any provocation, but ultimately there is nothing God cannot change, just take it to him with a sincere mind of ur helplesness and believe me, he will show himself strong in ur weakness. God bless u

U don't drink n u don't smoke. Na wah for some ppl sha

well i grid my teeth,bulge my eyes,swell my nostrils,with my lower lip covered by the upper,take a deep deep breath,walk away..

ijigbamigb: I hardly get angry and all my life, I haven't had a physical fight with anyone but lately I discover I can be uncontrollable when offended though am not quick to anger. I can be very abusive and swear. I can say words like 'get d hell outta my life' and after some minutes begin to beg because I actually said those words out of d immediate anger. I don't drink, I don't smoke and I don't cheat, I am very dedicated to my quest for a good life, and a happy home in d future and don't ever wish to be distracted.

How do I control myself not to be abusive when angry (cus I hate it and my fiancée hates it as well).

ur problem is caused by stress

anger is an emotion and its sometimes just right to be angry, but one shd try not to commit sin when angry and try not to stay long in d anger, Eph 4:26.
What i do when im angry; i sing, i sing soo loud dt i will not hear any other words around me again, by d time u cant hear me singing again, its means ive already forgotten abt my anger. 2ly, i make dt no matter what or who made me angry, i dont get angry 4 more than 120 mins, works well like magic 4 me.
What my partner does when angry with me, take a cup of water and drink, after abt 10 mins later, take a cool shower and invite me to d bedroom or drag me to d bedroom (sometimes) and "deal" with me and dt d end of d anger.
When angry with any other person, he walks out......simple.
My suggestions,
when u are angry with ur wife, drag her to bed and "deal" with her in love, believe me, it soothes.
With others, sing aloud to block ur ears from hearing irritative words or better still, walk away briefly. May God help u.

First of all, when things go the other way, people resolve to anger but as a default choice. Though it has to do with our temparaments but still, one can choose to be angry or remain calm. As a melancholic, I take my time to think over what the other party might've said or done and then decide whether it's worth it to be angry or not. Because my bible also says that Anger is reserved for fools (Ecc. 7:9). What some people on this page call ANGER is just GETTING UPSET, true anger will make you want to do sillly things (like Moses struck the rock). May GOD help us all. By the way, I recommend SPIRIT-CONTROLLED TEMPERAMENT by TIM LAHAYE. The book will help you conquer FEAR and ANGER.

ijigbamigb: I hardly get angry and all my life, I haven't had a physical fight with anyone but lately I discover I can be uncontrollable when offended though am not quick to anger. I can be very abusive and swear. I can say words like 'get d hell outta my life' and after some minutes begin to beg because I actually said those words out of d immediate anger. I don't drink, I don't smoke and I don't cheat, I am very dedicated to my quest for a good life, and a happy home in d future and don't ever wish to be distracted.

How edo I control myself not to be abusive when angry (cus I hate it and my fiancée hates it as well).

op, do I know u? cos u jst described my fiance.

@ topic, I salute ur courage @ being sincere to ur self. its a gudway 2 start. I mean it is good enough u already know ur shortcomings and how day offend ur fiancee. do yor best to control your emotion/ self. afterall we av self control because there is a self to b controlled.

so no Mata how offended u get try ur best possible nt to portray urself as weak by getting abusive. no lady would settle for a man who dosent control ever his emotions..

lastly dnt forget to commit into Gods hands pray and work for genuine change of attitude. do it not just fr urself and ur relationship, but your children yet unborn- ur own MIcro family. spare dem the pains of having to live in a crises-ridden home. God is able!!!!!!

goodluck.

The last thing a woman wants is a quiet and calm man when there is an issue. But you have to be man enough to calm urself after u ve explicitly made urself clear .

anger is my second name. When I get angry, I take a deep breath, sit down n just stare at d person that made me angry. It works for me a hell number of times, u can try it @ op

Kudos to all that commented on this thread and the poster for your sincerity.ANGER is an emotion that can destoy if not checked.Everyone gets angry but the response and duration in that high energy state makes the difference.Leaving the scene of agitation is not cowardice if you cannot control it anymore. When a man conquers his anger, he becomes the master of his emotions.

Aakon: well i grid my teeth,bulge my eyes,swell my nostrils,with my lower lip covered by the upper,take a deep deep breath,walk away..

lol

What an eye opening thread.
Thanks all for these recommendations. I'm gonna get better by God's grace.