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Is It Advisable To Marry At 22-25 As A Man? - Romance (4) - Nairaland

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Re: Is It Advisable To Marry At 22-25 As A Man? by kpolli(m): 3:14pm On Oct 29, 2012
mabebe1: 4 a gal i'd yes bt 4 a guy its a no no...he's 2 young

why? cos of the myth that girls mature faster than guys?? It's a myth
Re: Is It Advisable To Marry At 22-25 As A Man? by lecturerdabo(m): 3:48pm On Oct 29, 2012
Well many here are giving examples based on others BUT I AM TELLING YOU I GOT MARRIED FULLY (traditionally, legally and religously) AT 23YRS THOUGH NOT EASY BUT I THINK ITS ONE OF THE BEST THINGS THAT EVER HAPPENED TO ME. My son is six now, while I'm thirty.

NB. MY PARENTS DID NOT MARRY FOR ME NEITHER WAS I "RICH" BUT LIKE CHIMEZIE SAID I AM AN ONLY SON AND WORKING.
Re: Is It Advisable To Marry At 22-25 As A Man? by Topeedo: 3:57pm On Oct 29, 2012
Kirinwa:

However,whatever you think I still maintain that 22 is too early.Let me give you homework at what age does an average Nigerian man obtain first degree? Physically speaking is or can a 22 years old man be deemed to be mature?
RUBBISH!
Re: Is It Advisable To Marry At 22-25 As A Man? by Topeedo: 3:59pm On Oct 29, 2012
kpolli:

why? cos of the myth that girls mature faster than guys?? It's a myth
STICK TO D POINT OF D ARGUEMENT....
Re: Is It Advisable To Marry At 22-25 As A Man? by InvertedHammer: 4:02pm On Oct 29, 2012
Chime Chimezie: I 20 years old and i am from Enugu state wich is Igbo, i am the only son and my Father die 4 years ago, i am in my first year in school and my Mother has made so many investment and she is worried dat if anytin happenes 2 me, my wicked uncle will take everytin dat she has laboured for, so she has been telling me to get married next year, as For me, money is nt the problem, bt i want to be a graduate b4 i get married, bt considring my condition, i hav no other choice, infact i u am looking 4 a woman to marry now @ my young age, please i need ur advice, wat should i do?

If you have good financial foundation, I will advice you get married. Are you emotionally and psychologically ready for marriage? Well, those are the questions you will have to answer for yourself. I sincerely understand your mother's concern. They are legit. It seems that your mother is more concerned about heirs and heiress than your happiness(?) in marriage.
Re: Is It Advisable To Marry At 22-25 As A Man? by promire2004(f): 4:18pm On Oct 29, 2012
solbil: i want someone to ans my question. Why cant a man get married at the age of 22 even if he can afford it and a woman can marry at that age? What has the woman got that made her more qualified for marriage than the man at the same age.

The answer is not far-fetched. A man is the major provider while his wife renders assistance. Also, the nature of women physiologically allows them to marry earlier than their male counterparts. Women have limited time of conception. B/w mid 40ties and early 50ties, women are almost entering a new phase of life, 'menopause' where conception stops whereas an 80 year old man could still impregnate a woman. So, there is obviously no need to rush into marriage if u are a male. Your attention should be diverted to acquiring the basic survival instincts. Although, if you are financially stable between the ages of 22-25, then I fink one could consider marriage. Personally, I would suggest that the person waits a little longer, let's say 27-28 before settling down. #my 5 naira#
Re: Is It Advisable To Marry At 22-25 As A Man? by anukulapo: 4:57pm On Oct 29, 2012
solbil: i want someone to ans my question. Why cant a man get married at the age of 22 even if he can afford it and a woman can marry at that age? What has the woman got that made her more qualified for marriage than the man at the same age.

You still don't get this our Nigerian mentality.She(the lady) most likely have nothing at 22 and shifts/expects that the responsibility of providing everything is the man's.

That aside,there are many men and women over 30 that are not yet married--most are not by choice but due to conditions beyond finance and the so called maturity. Some of them don too tey--so tey dem no sabi when,how, and where to grab it. They just realized that they still don't know so much to enable them find themselves married.
Re: Is It Advisable To Marry At 22-25 As A Man? by jkross(m): 5:08pm On Oct 29, 2012
Chime Chimezie: I 20 years old and i am from Enugu state wich is Igbo, i am the only son and my Father die 4 years ago, i am in my first year in school and my Mother has made so many investment and she is worried dat if anytin happenes 2 me, my wicked uncle will take everytin dat she has laboured for, so she has been telling me to get married next year, as For me, money is nt the problem, bt i want to be a graduate b4 i get married, bt considring my condition, i hav no other choice, infact i u am looking 4 a woman to marry now @ my young age, please i need ur advice, wat should i do?
Your mom is not wrong neither is she right..they are not asking you to marry but to get a male child to carry on the family name should anything happen to you..
I am the only male child and so also is my dad..he married at 36, I have been under pressure lately from my dad's sister to get married but guess what I asked them..if they can guarantee that the girl I will marry will drop a baby boy at first birth..and personally I prefer my first two kids to be females. So if you are not ready stand your grounds and wait till after you graduate
Re: Is It Advisable To Marry At 22-25 As A Man? by kenono(m): 5:12pm On Oct 29, 2012
ƑƟя me I can marry young if I'm financially buoyant, our view towards marriage has always been "it's full of sufferings, so difficult, so bad, so problematic" does it mean no one has seen a peaceful marriage?


Anyway, it's individual difference shaa. But the most important thing is for the person to know for sure that He or She is ready.
Re: Is It Advisable To Marry At 22-25 As A Man? by Obelomo: 6:18pm On Oct 29, 2012
I don't think it is too young to get married, after all that is an adult. Infact, many young ladies ranging that age are not married, because guys their age group, are not ready to get married. These ladies, especially in our culture get blamed.
Re: Is It Advisable To Marry At 22-25 As A Man? by dayokanu(m): 6:58pm On Oct 29, 2012
Yorubas say to marry no be problem na to provide for your family be the main issue
Re: Is It Advisable To Marry At 22-25 As A Man? by kpolli(m): 7:53pm On Oct 29, 2012
[quote author=Topeedo] STICK TO D POINT OF D ARGUEMENT....[/quote

If u don't understand my point, lemme break it down for u. . . If a woman can, so can a man. . . . I don't think marriage is down to the age but the readiness to accept responsibility. . . A man does not need to be 30 for him to be responsible

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Re: Is It Advisable To Marry At 22-25 As A Man? by dmcdad: 8:10pm On Oct 29, 2012
eduson55: is it advisable to marry at 22-25 as a man?

Hell yeah! Marriage is about maturity and not age. You'll also agree with me that maturity is not about ur age buh your ability to be able to react to and handle issues properly. Its also about emotional stability which enables u to contain whatever situation that comes to the fore.. If u are financially stable and you have the above listed attributes coupled with the psychological readiness to indulge in marital life, then the sky is ur starting point. Who says its wrong? Is there age tag attached to getting married? What pericope of the bible talked about age in marriage? Its always about when a man is ripe for it and being ripe is not about getting to a certain age.. Is it?
Re: Is It Advisable To Marry At 22-25 As A Man? by dmcdad: 8:14pm On Oct 29, 2012
[quote author=kpolli][/quote]

Gbam! Tell them... If a gurl marries at 18 no one will talk about it being early buh if a man marries at 25 its early. Is that so? Balderdash!

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Re: Is It Advisable To Marry At 22-25 As A Man? by illicit(m): 10:17pm On Oct 29, 2012
If things had gone my way I wud av married @21... I shuda graduate and had a job by den but jamb won't let me...smh
Re: Is It Advisable To Marry At 22-25 As A Man? by nanotee: 11:07pm On Oct 29, 2012
I need definitions of some terms used here; Marriage and Maturity. The manner I see the term 'Maturity' used on marriage related threads makes me feel it's like some very high moral standard that can just not be attained. Marriage in my own words has to do with a close companionship, then responsibilities. Lets stop scaring guys away from marriage.
Re: Is It Advisable To Marry At 22-25 As A Man? by Xlad(m): 11:36pm On Oct 29, 2012
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Re: Is It Advisable To Marry At 22-25 As A Man? by chic2pimp(m): 12:15am On Oct 30, 2012
Absolutely nothing wrong jare.
Married Ileke Idi at a much younger age. 12 to be specific
Re: Is It Advisable To Marry At 22-25 As A Man? by benbrains(m): 11:25am On Oct 30, 2012
Kirinwa: It's too early,maybe 25 yes.You need to be mature though and have a stable means of income.
Does age have anything to do with maturity?
Re: Is It Advisable To Marry At 22-25 As A Man? by benbrains(m): 11:38am On Oct 30, 2012
Kirinwa: It's too early,maybe 25 yes.You need to be mature though and have a stable means of income.
Does age have anything to do with maturity?
kenono: ƑƟя me I can marry young if I'm financially buoyant, our view towards marriage has always been "it's full of sufferings, so difficult, so bad, so problematic" does it mean no one has seen a peaceful marriage?


Anyway, it's individual difference shaa. But the most important thing is for the person to know for sure that He or She is ready.
Just a second, can U̶̲̥̅̊ plz throw more light on W̶̲̥̅ђa̶̲̥̅̊† U̶̲̥̅̊ mean by " financially buoyant"? Thanks...
Re: Is It Advisable To Marry At 22-25 As A Man? by Nobody: 11:41am On Oct 30, 2012
You all hve said good tangible things abt marriage, and i appreciate dat fact. . . . Take me 4 an example, am 22yrs+, a graduate. . Hv a good well paid job in an international company, financial stable, hv all i want, a gud girlfrnd who's 20yrs, an undergraduate. . We love,respect,undastand nd trust each oda, dating 4a year nw. . . .we'v planned to settle dwn in less than 4yrs time. . . While we grow & get to knw ourselvs more beta. .am matured in all aspect. . . .asin doing things which a responsible person is suppose to do e.t.c. . .and hv bin thinkin abt gettin married @ 25. Cos am always ready to face any challenge and be a Good man. WHAT DO U GUYS THINK?
Re: Is It Advisable To Marry At 22-25 As A Man? by dmcdad: 11:48am On Oct 30, 2012
JakeMars: You all hve said good tangible things abt marriage, and i appreciate dat fact. . . . Take me 4 an example, am 22yrs+, a graduate. . Hv a good well paid job in an international company, financial stable, hv all i want, a gud girlfrnd who's 20yrs, an undergraduate. . We love,respect,undastand nd trust each oda, dating 4a year nw. . . .we'v planned to settle dwn in less than 4yrs time. . . While we grow & get to knw ourselvs more beta. .am matured in all aspect. . . .asin doing things which a responsible person is suppose to do e.t.c. . .and hv bin thinkin abt gettin married @ 25. Cos am always ready to face any challenge and be a Good man. WHAT DO U GUYS THINK?

Go for it! Thats what we are talking about brah... You have the core things needed, the paramount things. Who says you can't handle whatever situation that you tend to face? Sure you can! And thats what makes you a man. The ability to be able to take good decisions and stand by them at all times. You have a good and lucrative job, you are emotionally stable.... Common, the sky is your starting point...
Re: Is It Advisable To Marry At 22-25 As A Man? by kenono(m): 12:24pm On Oct 30, 2012
benbrains:
Does age have anything to do with maturity?
Just a second, can U̶̲̥̅̊ plz throw more light on W̶̲̥̅ђa̶̲̥̅̊† U̶̲̥̅̊ mean by " financially buoyant"? Thanks...

I want to substitute the word "buoyant" with "stable" I meant the man should have a "dependable" source of income, marriage can be frustrating if it is graced with early sufferings and poverty. Both of them should be able to agree that they are ready for the "challenges" be that as it may.
Re: Is It Advisable To Marry At 22-25 As A Man? by Wislet(f): 1:34pm On Oct 30, 2012
@ age 25........ YES!!
Why do some think everything is about school? We tend to support such arguments with, ''He's not through with school .... He couldn't have gotten a job by then....''.etc.
.
Some men have solid jobs by the age of 23-24, not to talk of 25..
.
Marriage readiness is a state of the mind.
You could have a 40yr old man who shouldn't by all means and purposes step close to the altar with another man's daughter, because he is not fit to be a husband.
He could be a drunkard, never-do-well, woman beater,etc. Should we then say that because he is a 'grown' (by our own standards)man by that age he MUST marry?
.
When a man is ready to shoulder the responsibility of a home, is matured in his thinking, has learnt how to respond to a woman(especially when she acts up), and is ready to learn daily from the elderly ones with a stable home, I'd say he is MAN ENOUGH to go ahead and marry.
.
More especially when he accompanies that with a level headed, respectful, and loving choice of partner who is willing to make a success of it too.(VEEEERY VEEERY IMPORTANT, MEN).
.
@those crying 'experience'.
For how long are you going to keep jumping from one woman to the other in the name of getting experience. More prompting: How much experience do you think is ENOUGH to acquire before you take the bold step?
.
There can never be ENOUGH experience.
.
When you have understood to some extent how women think, how to control yourself when they go overboard, how to treat them right, home management(especially the financial aspect), how to be a good husband yourself, then you're good to go.
.
As your years in marriage increase, you acquire more experience for 'your own home', cos no two marriages are the same. Same way, no two women are the same.
Re: Is It Advisable To Marry At 22-25 As A Man? by McCoded007(m): 2:08pm On Oct 30, 2012
my beliv is if u knw wat u r doing, it will always workout. even if it did not workout 4 som1 u knw dt doznt mean it wont workout 4 u...
n besides it will be a pride for u in about another 20yrs time. then u will be happy u made dt decision

as a matter of fact ever since i ve been in dis world i've never beliv in wat any1 doz cos i belv i cn strt wat no1 as ever done b4 n dt means i strtd it..even d issue of religion i still belv i cn practice d both religion at d same time regardles of watever religion my partner is cos i dnt discriminate n i'm a muslim.

jst belv in urslf, if u knw u r buoyant enuf to carry a family y wuldnt u marry at d age
Re: Is It Advisable To Marry At 22-25 As A Man? by benbrains(m): 4:14pm On Oct 30, 2012
kenono:

I want to substitute the word "buoyant" with "stable" I meant the man should have a "dependable" source of income, marriage can be frustrating if it is graced with early sufferings and poverty. Both of them should be able to agree that they are ready for the "challenges" be that as it may.
I think I get, but the truth is dat, dependable source of income has never made a success of any marriage, otherwise Africa should have recorded the highest number of failed marriages.
Age on the other hand may not be a criterium,but there is such a thing as the age of accountability, which is a function of age and exposure, it s W̶̲̥̅ђa̶̲̥̅̊† matters, really. This age /level of accountabilty varies amongst culture. In Nigeria and perhaps other African countries, it is believed to be d time when or after U̶̲̥̅̊ have obtained ur BSc,or when U̶̲̥̅̊ hv left your parents house while in the western world it is not,U̶̲̥̅̊ can guess that.
In my own opinion, I think the major cause of failed marriages is not understanding it's essence, money should nt necessarily be a factor, age, hmnnn, U̶̲̥̅̊ won't want to advice ur broda of 14, to go get married.
... There is nothing wrong in getting married btw the ages of 22 and 25, provided...

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Re: Is It Advisable To Marry At 22-25 As A Man? by Monicasque(f): 12:46pm On Jul 05, 2013
he can marry but the wife must pray that he does not turn into a little player afterwards coz men just like playing too much
Re: Is It Advisable To Marry At 22-25 As A Man? by dmcdad: 4:15pm On Jul 05, 2013
Monicasque: he can marry but the wife must pray that he does not turn into a little player afterwards coz men just like playing too much
Not all men my dear... Take it easy when generalizing. Okay?
Re: Is It Advisable To Marry At 22-25 As A Man? by P4VS20: 6:35am On Jul 09, 2013
Monicasque: he can marry but the wife must pray that he does not turn into a little player afterwards coz men just like playing too much

like girls dont play @ such age....meeeeechhhheewwwwwwww!
Re: Is It Advisable To Marry At 22-25 As A Man? by Godson201333(m): 10:08am On Jul 09, 2013
Monicasque: he can marry but the wife must pray that he does not turn into a little player afterwards coz men just like playing too much
And so many girls are players too..
Re: Is It Advisable To Marry At 22-25 As A Man? by 2kurupt(m): 1:08pm On Jul 09, 2013
eduson55: what about the whites that do it,or are we different?


Obviously that's why they got a higher divorce rate

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