Hi guys,

Got ya mails.

Thanks a millions. U guys reinforce my belief in the peculiar specie called The Nigerian.

I'm cool. Doing another poem.

You guys made it happen. Bless Ya!

one more thing,
life is a teacher. be sure u dont repeat the mistakes you made before since you said you saw the signs

@seemenow,



happy to see you're getting your life back and i think tis even better now. Big uos to you man. (And thanx for naming the poem o! )

Seemenow, am rite there now but am doing fine. Proud of u boi!

Having just recently gone through a broken marriage which I would gladly have stayed put in, I just want to share a few things with you.
There is no getting over the relationship overnight, never mind what anyone says. You will have moments and difficult days. But learn to take one day at a time. The memories will begin to fade over time and you will begin to live and appreciate things in a new light because you would have undergone some circumcision of some sort. Don't be hard on yourself whatever you did or didn't do. I went through a lot of books on emotional healing and particularly found Joyce Meyer's Beauty for Ashes a real balm. I read through a thousand and one articles on emotional healing and forgiveness; and in those times of my deepest despair, I would cry to God in prayer and those were the times he said the most comforting words to me that I hold on to today and encourage myself with whenever I begin to feel down. Journaling also helped a lot. And I cried a lot too(I'm a woman) and let out much of the pent up anger through that. If I was not a Christian, I know I would have harmed myself because of the sheer intensity of the pain I felt. I had high moments and extremely low ones too when I didn't just want to get out of bed. And thank God for family, and good friends who never stopped calling. Honestly, heartbreak is never pleasant and I would not wish it on my worst enemy; but I have come out on the other side better, stronger and more aware of my humanity and my need for the Almighty. Do I look forward to a better marriage in future? You bet I do. And that is the hope that keeps me going. God is your strength. You will get through, my brother.

How are u doing seemenow? I got your mails and i mailed u too. Nice contributions you got from guys here.
Lifted one, i am sorry about your experience. Its about positive approach to things . i must comment you for not hurting yourself. I am happy you are out of it.

Aisha, where are u? hope u are fine?
Just to know how you guys are doing.
Cheers

@ Lifted one, God will continue to give you strenght. I cant even begin to imagine the pain you felt.
@ MIkiplus, Cava tries bein merci, et vous?

aisha ! manchester for ever more ! We didnt deserve that penalty, right? Unfortunately, the keeper didnt touch the player. the player actually used his knee on MY KEEPER !! did u see the reverse angle ! Ronaldo was pushed away inside 18 !! the defender went for ronaldo and not for the ball but, the REF REFUSED to do his thing ! The koko be say, MANCHESTER rules !

For real, i wish i could converse with you in french ! I dey sha.
whats your yahoo i.d? i am online now buzz on
cheers

send me your email add or yahoo ID i will send you a mail please. We didnt deserve the penalty, we practically played 10 against 12. Anyay, nothing spoil, the cup stays at OT.
The referee should be publicly folgged.

hello aisha.

@miklplus, you can remove your ID, now.

thanks aisha. done that

whats up people?
cheers

@Mikiplus, I think the thread is dead. Seemenow just dey flenge dey go

i agree with u aisha

Hi Friends,
I'm really sorry for staying away for these few days. I'd been away on assignment that took me to a rural location. Aisha the thread is not dead o ! And I pray make you no flenge dis kain flenge o ! Micklplus, forgive me bro. I'll make it up to you.

@liftedone,
Thanks Sis for your lines. Coincidentally, I just got back today to see a copy of Meyer's book that a friend sent to my office.
I'm not yet into it but I'd read the blurb and knew it's going to be helpful. Reading your post also reassured me that it's Ok to feel the yawning emptiness that periodically threatens to overwhelm me. I can't help getting touchy when some friends try to insinuate that I should have TOTALLY forgot the whole episode by now. Agreed 4 years may be only to some folks, maybe even a lot of folks, but it is an awfully looooong time for me to forget in just two months. Especially when , let me not talk about memories again. Thanks Sis and I wish you the best. Like you rightly pointed out, it's teaching me to depend more on God cos in retrospect, I still think that I overcherished the relationship if there's something like that.

@sammy901
Thanks for your site but I don't really need that now.

@topsido
Bless u bro, and thanks for posting.

@ogreguba
You are welcome, I'm glad u are glad.

@kayemjay
I'd follow your advice, and thanks for posting.

@all
I'd love to get more recommendations on helpful books (I love reading), and also some sites (not dating sites please).
And please the thread is not dead.
God bless you all.

aisha, shebi i tell u say the thread never die? LOL
Good to have u back seemenow.
cheers

I see oh, my friend.
Seemenow dey kampe. How work now?

work dey kampe but, the thing the take stlye they hook me oooooooo

Hi good people,
Reminds me of a poser one of our ibo neighbours once threw at us, back in those primary school days, "how kwanu una go think say 'actor' don die? Abi una no know say if 'actor' die, na him be say film don finish?"

Mick, s'up? Aisha if no be you eh ? Anyway, I now understand your capa - to encourage me to free myself of it all, abi ?
This thread 'Actor' never die, so therefore (apologies to zebrudaya) the film continues.

Hey, before I sign out, I heard a new one today: [b]"My son don't worry, you will never appreciate the truth of the mirror,  until you stand naked before one!"[/b]And believe me folks, that was from a Madman (And I mean MAD as in the dictionary definition of M-A-D!).

I will fill you in on an entertaining digression from this topic, hopefully in my next post.

I am me cos of u all.

Meanwhile, the film (abi thread) goes on.
Love.

My Guy, How are u doing? I can see u are great now and its good to know. Hope work isnt too killing? your number hasnt been going, u own MTN? LOL
Aisha, that yesterday was just somehow ! i couldnt even eat until after 4pm! Hope you are good? call u later.

You na don hear o, the actor says. action continues ! Ghen ghen !

Good Morning to both my Darlings. Seemenow, how work, tried to call you yesterday, didnt go tru, mikiplus how far now. Work can be like that most times, but abeg try to chop.
Have a nice day.

MY HEAD WAN SCATTER!

Me?

Someone's darling?

Darling! Again? (For me now, the fear of Darlingnity is the beginning of wisdom O!)

Micklplus, one of us go give up his darlingship O! and E no go be me o!

I'm awfully sorry for the 'not available' tone you've been hearing probably since monday. One word: Meetings - you know, the entreprenuer-begging-financiers-who-cos-they-hold-the-bucks-detain-entreprenuer-using-marathon-conference room-tactics, kinda stuff.

Hopefully, it 'll all be over by this weekend.

SITUATION REPORT: Am I happy with myself and my progress so far? YES!

Wow!

D-A-R-L-I-N-G!

Aisha of all people!

Aisha of the 1273-and counting post!

Even if na siamese abi cojoined darlingship, No be God!

Good people, while I get ready the madman tale that I promise ya, please allow me to savour this honorary darlingtorate.

Like Dube sang: "If it's a dreeeeeeeeeeaam, don't wake me uuuuuuuuuup!"

Wonder where all dis pidgin dey come from today. Seriously suspect the buka-like rice I ate in a new eatery with a very queer name, along Akin adeshola.

Abro Mick, nothing do you. Just a little time, we go cancel enuff. Capici?

Am out(to be back).

Ghen ghen! (In case u no grab Mick's Nollywood Stylee)

Don't know what I'd do without you guys.

Love.

hey buddy! How u dey? work could be crazy i know ! but just take it easy. u say ur pidgin too much? why u too dey eat mama put to much??
oh, i didnt tell you that my other name is darlington !! i have P.HD ( Person Holding d Darling) You think say e easy but if u insist, there has to be a competition so that, we can finally determine who takes queen Aisha _{King michael darlington}

Aisha baby! how u dey? Nothing do u and infact, no long thing !

Just say make i hail una.
Cheers

Na wa oh, Na so d darling dey sweet somke people, in other not to spark any confsion i take the darling back instead i say My sweethearts.
Waz up u guys, am really enjoying your friendship. Thanks for the nice words.
Seemeno and mikiplus, enjoy you day and the eekend ahead, my sweet Darlings, Bon Weekend

howdy mr. seemenow, see you've got something good going on here. So your heart e don heal now ba? And you don get new padi and 'darling' (innocent quote o), good for you mans! Just remember to always avoid making same mistakes o, if you go and get your heart broken again ehn, no com hia dey cry boo hoo, she left me o! lol. juss messing. Imma let leesha and mick tk cr of ya. L8rz man.

Hi all,

Just said to drop a post that will keep d thread on while I get d promised mad man stuff ready. Went to a friend’s place at the weekend. Boy, was it fun seeing a 28 year funky dad with his 2 kids. Made me wish I were him (had actually planned on doing that this year but …) until his 9 month old son threw up on my shirt.

Mike and Aisha, Sup? U guy’s still da bomb.

@ogreguba.
Oga no worry  I don shine my eye now . Hope u are cool. Thanks for posting.


[center]STILL HEALING

None I believe know
The cause of my Monday pilgrimage
To a deserted beach

None but you.

I have gone back since then
Again and again

To unsmell and to unsavour
The fragrance of your presence

To untwirl in my fingers
The strands of your hair

To unswim and to undrown
In the aura of your spirit

I have gone back since then
Again and again

In  this cleansing ritual
To what used to be
the shrine of our passion.[i][/i][/center]

I hope you guys enjoyed the poem.

Love.

Good to see the dude is still healing

at original poster
I used to look forward to ur updates (and occasional flashbacks/history) abt ur emotional journey. Whats been happening with you, hope u r good though. When you can drop a post ok. Cheers

aww, bless . . . The power of human nature (nairalanders and true friends), selfless, giving, compassionate, considerate, kind . . .off now to go and find that button to make this site my homepage.

Hi good people,

Sorry for keeping mum this long. I'd been a little distracted by stuff.

Somehow, I’m inspired to make this post cos of some people who this thread had given me the privilege of sharing their friendship. If I’ll equate the outpouring of love (yes, Love) that I’d gotten from folks, I'd tell you, good people, that we Nigerians have an amazing capacity for showing kindness. Quite a number of you sent me an IM, and from there, I’d gotten to speak with quite a number, and from then started forming what by God's grace, I believe will be lifelong bonds of friendship.

I have been deeply touched and changed by the wonderful kindness from hitherto total strangers, most of who still remain faceless. If there is one unforgettable lesson, I believe that I will walk away with, from here; it will be that a voice can inspire much more emotions than a face possibly can.

Your voices did.

Work pressure had made it almost impossible for me to get the earlier stuff I’d promised you folks but after speaking with one of the contributors to this thread last night, I’d  hurriedly put together a poem which I hope you will find as much pleasure in as I had when I was writing it.

Enjoy.

[center]YOU SHOWED ME
You showed me
When pain threatened my peace
and my heart was filled with hurt

when my neighbours couldn’t see
my sorrow, you saw
the colors of my tears

after she left a void
in a heart filled for four years
and my labors held no solace
nor my house proved a refuge

I was sinking
I was drowning

I questioned my ability to
Hold on to something good
Again, until my fingers
And my keyboard gave me
A three word visa to nairaland:
HEAL-A-HEART!

In online vocab, it was “A new thread”
But in reality, an amazing gateway
To an outpouring of anonymous kindness

You showed me
You called me
You held me

With your posts, weaving electronic bonds
Stronger than blood covenants

And when I sank deep
You reached out even deeper
Aiding my revival with unforgettable
Words of hope, empathy, love
And sometimes with bits of scorn

You touched me
You humbled me
You changed me

With each new post, a fresh proof
That pain sometimes holds a better promise

baby4u2, creamdream, kalmebad, TOYOSI20,
ifyalways, almondjoy, micklplus, Nautillus,
masam, aisha2, chychy,4Him ,Damoche10,
jibosqie, ogrebuga, firestar, ®~^Sly^~®,bennygee,
dellynash, Bawss, Ogreguba, kayemjay, topside,
sammy901, liftedone, big_bumper

With friends like you
I need no more angels

And if perhaps I see a friend in pain
Ask for help to see him thru
Even if I try to shut my mouth
I know my ear will hear my voice in truth:
“Go to NAIRALAND,
There are people there!”

Because you showed me![/center]
I hope you guys enjoyed the poem.

@ Bawass
A lot of waters has passed under the bridge.
But I promise to keep you posted.

The film still dey unfold.

Ghen ghen!

Love ya all.

seemenow, I'm just happy to see the light is already shining through from the other side of the tunnel. It's such a joy when things start looking up and you see that life is not so bad after all. I have also made a new friend through this thread and he's been such a sweetheart. Nigerians indeed have such  large hearts.
Stay blessed, my brother. And to my new friend, thanks for being so patient with me.
GOD BLESS NAIRALAND AND NAIRALNDERS. _{and seun}