The rate at which some ladies/guys dump their lovers when they enter university or NYSC camp makes me wonder whether there is wisdom in sponsoring a would be wife or husband in school nowadays. I had an uncle who sponsored a lady right from secondary school through university only to be dump by the lady who referred to him as old school. Equally rich educated ladies have picked guys 'from the gutters', trained them and cleaned them up only to be dumped later. Is it WISE to train up a lover or just marry a made lady or guy to avoid some avoidable heartbreak?

There was never a time a lady will end up marrying that illiterate truck driver that spends all his fortune on her, sending her to a univerisity. I will better marry a red made graduate than wasting my time sending one thing to school. Unless if she has at least two kids for me. First to comment! Lolz.

There is nothing "un-wise" in helping someone through school or whatever. Help if you can, without expecting anything in return. Help, not because he/she is your girlfriend/boyfriend but because you choose to. That way, you rarely get hurt or dissapointed. Just do your thing.

lyk caracta wrote, help if u can without expecting anything in return.. he or she may decide to dump u but.... help anyways or wat are friends for?

Just like caracta and gree-die said help train any1 you can bt I maintain dat its unwise to train a lover with the hope of marrying such a one becos u maybe jilted. . take not I said maybe. Help unconditionally if possible.

In this modern day and world where true love is difficult to find and deception and lies re the order of de day,i ll think more than a million times before i do this dangerous thing that can lead to pepertual regret.

Just like caracta, gree-die and kaynee said you can help without expecting a thing in return

If you see a lady and you like her and you want to train her at the university and later marry her , my advice would be marry her and then train her. If she say you must train her before you marry her. Run na armed rubber jeep. Or else you wan t to troway money.

IZUKWU: If you see a lady and you like her and you want to train her at the university and later marry her , my advice would be marry her and then train her. If she say you must train her before you marry her. Run na armed rubber jeep. Or else you wan t to troway money.

Guy, you are very correct! We learn from people's mistake. We should not wait to commit our own blunder.

It depends on the person training her. Let's compare a lawyer and an illiterate training a would be wife in the varsity. The standards are not the same. On the other hand, you can do it without expecting anything in return but it is apposite to note that nothing is free in this life. Digest that before accepting any favour whatsoever. Time will come when you'll pay, it could be nigh or afar.

well it's easy to help a friend without expecting something in return but the OP clearly stated LOVER..

Let's face it, helping a LOVER out in her education and not expecting something in return, either as love or that she/he will marry you or even satisfy you sexually at the end of her stay there is unrealistic.

We all are humans and soemtimes we usually want soemthing in return even from freinds...it can be loyalty or appreciativeness in terms of friends


saying "help a lover out(someone you are in love with)" without expecting ANYTHING in return is pure crap

I see some educated ladies sending their lovers to school in a bid to clean up their guy and bring him up to their standard. My sister you are just gambling with your heart becos when lover boy finish school he no go look your side again. That time when he finish school, and the lady wants to settle down with him, he will tell the lady 'I'll pay you back all the money you spent on me, we are not compatible'. See bombheartbreak o. And then d lady fit don reach 35 or even 40yrs because she dey wait mek her guy finish B.Eng/ B.Pharm or any 5yr course. So ladies be wise.

Hmmm, I think d problem arises when u train someone to progress while u stagnate. If u r training some1 to upgrade and u dn't upgrade urself na u sabi, but if u r upgrading ur girl or guy from second sch to uni and u also upgrade urself from bachelors to masters e.t.c, then u r aways on top so d chances of being dumped reduces and ur r still on top cos u r doing d sponsoring.

Definitely sucide mission..let her finish the school if she still okey then l marry her..

Naw. I wouldn't put that kind of money on someone "in the hopes" that they will be with me.
It would be after marriage.

...Now, if I do it, then it would mean I have convinced and made it VERY clear to myself that it is NOT for the purposes of buying this person's love, but because I intend to be generous.

Caracta: There is nothing "un-wise" in helping someone through school or whatever. Help if you can, without expecting anything in return. Help, not because he/she is your girlfriend/boyfriend but because you choose to. That way, you rarely get hurt or dissapointed. Just do your thing.

Seconded.

abohrandy: i have one point to make!!!

NIGERIANS ARE VERY DISLOYAL people!!

And fake people also.

Caracta and Gree-die already settled it

Engage in charitable activities for its own sake and not because you are expecting a reward in return.

I actually like it when these ladies dump you... such stupidity should not go unpunished.

Dont you ppl have relatives some village that need education?

O di kwa very risky....... I had a lot of coursemates who were been sponsored by dere boyfriends, some were faithful, some were not.....funny enough the faithful ones were majorly Ibo (its like ibo girls ve a sense of loyalty lacking in other tribes) and before u call me a tribalistic person, lemme tell u dat am urhobo and I am not into ibo girls... d unfaithful ones re Majorly**lemme not say it, lest I cause a tribal war** (dis tribe ehn even dere married women re loose)......

Now to answer ur question, personally I see nothing wrong wit it, I can and I will sponsor my gf to further her education, as long as I ve d money, why not!!!, I don't want to end up wit a patience jonathan, and I ve no qualms wit her having a higher qualification dan me....if she likes she can cheat on me @ skool, karma will take of dat.

# dumb nigga

pleep: I actually like it when these ladies dump you... such stupidity should not go unpunished.

Dont you ppl have relatives some village that need education?

Needing education and deserving it are to different things bro

Mynd_44:
Needing education and deserving it are to different things bro

Believe me man, if you try to educate these types of dude they wont listen.

When it comes to dating most men have to learn from their mistakes.

pleep: Believe me man, if you try to educate these types of dude they wont listen.

When it comes to dating most men have to learn from their mistakes.

And they will keep making the same mistakes

Why upgrade someone else when you can upgrade yourself?
I can't train my love in school,for what,is her relative dead?
Invest in yourself,and ladies will come begging,than hoping on one cheap slutt,slugging out with someone else,while you foot the bill.

Yomieluv: Why upgrade someone else when you can upgrade yourself?
I can't train my love in school,for what,is her relative dead?
Invest in yourself,and ladies will come begging,than hoping on one cheap slutt,slugging out with someone else,while you foot the bill.

I subscribe to this view. I have heard very many negative outcome from both guys and ladies who trained their would be spouses to higher institutions only to be dumped with the popular line 'I will pay back all that you spent on me'. Its not a wise thing to do in this our age. It might have worked in the 80's and part of 90's but not in this millenium

naija babes sha!! if u no fit marry am,y u dey collect money in d first place

haitto99: naija babes sha!! if u no fit marry am,y u dey collect money in d first place

If the guy offers, why should they reject? Who no like better thing?

;Omo no be this modern day oooo.....abi which kind play dog dey follow lion play...no monkey for idanre again oooo, I no dey run charity home wey I go dey send money 2 one olosho @t d end of d day come dump my ass..

Yomieluv: Why upgrade someone else when you can upgrade yourself?

Doesn't dis sound selfish?

Just like saying why give someone else breakfast when u can use dat 4 lunch or dinner . My dear, if u hv d opportunity as well as d means to help, pls do. D peace n joy u'll feel within 4 making sum1 beter shud be enuf to propel u to help. Buh if u must expect sumtin in return then u might as well keep d help to urself cos d truth is, people will in most cases not live up to ur xpectations.