Stats: 3,190,858 members, 7,942,150 topics. Date: Friday, 06 September 2024 at 10:01 PM |
Nairaland Forum / Entertainment / Literature / The Burgle (A Fiction About UNIBEN) (2297 Views)
She Came with Hope - A Fiction. / Hope And The Island Of Greatness- A Fiction (allegory) Written By Sammy Hoe / ''journey Of No Return'' A Fiction Centered On The Nigerian Civil War. (2) (3) (4)
The Burgle (A Fiction About UNIBEN) by Ezedking(m): 12:30pm On Mar 15, 2013 |
[color=#E00000][/color] Dedicated to all past nd present UNIBEN students and lovers of literature THE BURGLE "It's only humans that would cut down trees, make paper from them and write DONT CUT TREES on them!" This, I muttered to myself in wonder while searching through my old and overstocked cupboard that bore the burden of accomodating my too many books (which now lay scattered) like a woman pregnant with quadruplets as I stumbled on a pamphlet with the inscription "SAVE TREES TODAY, PRESERVE THE FUTURE!" which had been given to me during the National Agriculture Students Association week by Tope, the Forestry and wildlife management student with whom I and ten others shared the unconducive room 44. After reading through it twice, it inspired me into writing a poem on nature which Tope had refered to as "a boring game" and succeeded in spoiling my day in return for showing him the poem. "I'm sure he does not even know the content of the pamphlet he shared two weeks ago" I thought, continuing my search as my sweat pores began to pump out sweat like a vandalised NNPC pipeline. I dug further into the cockroach infested cupboard with eager hands like a starved dog struggling for food. To be continued.... |
Re: The Burgle (A Fiction About UNIBEN) by Ezedking(m): 3:55pm On Mar 23, 2013 |
[color=#E00000][/color] Am back.... |
Re: The Burgle (A Fiction About UNIBEN) by drsolob(m): 12:00am On Mar 24, 2013 |
Oya continue na am wating for ur update |
Re: The Burgle (A Fiction About UNIBEN) by LarrySun(m): 9:33am On Mar 24, 2013 |
Try to space your paragraphs. Doing that will make for easier readings. |
Re: The Burgle (A Fiction About UNIBEN) by Ezedking(m): 9:53pm On Mar 24, 2013 |
"Yeh! Mógbé! " Tope screamed with his mouth wide open and placing his hands on his football sized head, grabbing it firmly as if it was about to fall off his reed-like neck. "He must be very good at spying during exams" "No wonder he doesn't read!" I thought as he carried his lanky figure into the hot, sardine-tight room in his faded Super eagles jersey and carrot trousers that exposed his wide bow legs that looked like a motorcycle tyre from a distance. His facial look was a perfect explanation for the word "wildlife" in the name of his department. He was shocked beyond words like a typical Nollywood village boy (would do on his first visit to Lagos) on seeing the padlock on his cupboard broken with the door hanging wearily on its hinges as other occupants of the room (both legal and illegal) were busy going through their cupboards and luggage respectively. A thief had broken into our room during the African cup of nations final match between Nigeria and Côte d'Ivoire. The burgling of rooms during football matches has always been a recurring nightmare in Hall 4, Unit 4. Room 44 had always been a sacred cow to this for I had always remained indoors. It had always been ninety minutes of peaceful reading for me as all my roommates were football freaks who always enjoyed arguing after every match. Today, I was forced to leave the hostel to study in a classroom when the vibration of the hostel due to the shouts of "GOAL" became unbearable. "Eze, why you commot today na?" Tope asked aggressively, his Yoruba accent accompanying his words as they slipped through the air. "I be your security man?" I shot at him, my eyes reddening with anger as I gave him a look that carried the message; "thunder faya you!" behind it. "Small men (like him) must always think small and act small" I concluded, remembering one of Professor Okpewho's book. This calmed my nerves as I settled down to continue my search through my many novels and cement-block sized textbooks. |
Re: The Burgle (A Fiction About UNIBEN) by Ezedking(m): 9:55pm On Mar 24, 2013 |
Larry-Sun: ok. 10ks |
Re: The Burgle (A Fiction About UNIBEN) by FoxyUltimate(m): 11:18am On Mar 25, 2013 |
Following..... |
Re: The Burgle (A Fiction About UNIBEN) by Ezedking(m): 10:21am On Apr 06, 2013 |
Am back LOAdIng...... ██████████████████ 50% ████████████████████ 60% ███████████████████████ 70% ███████████████████████████ 80% ███████████████████████████ ███ 90% ...... |
Re: The Burgle (A Fiction About UNIBEN) by Valon4ego(m): 4:42pm On Apr 06, 2013 |
Ezedking: [color=#E00000][/color]are you a uniben student? |
Re: The Burgle (A Fiction About UNIBEN) by Nobody: 8:01am On Apr 08, 2013 |
Is there rum 44 in uniben? Jst asking# |
Re: The Burgle (A Fiction About UNIBEN) by ewosk: 2:34pm On Apr 09, 2013 |
eze nice piece...bt porter dey find u ooo..hmmm..#unit 4 Room 44 |
Re: The Burgle (A Fiction About UNIBEN) by Ezedking(m): 10:50pm On Apr 09, 2013 |
Valon4ego: are you a uniben student? YES |
Re: The Burgle (A Fiction About UNIBEN) by Ezedking(m): 10:56pm On Apr 09, 2013 |
ewosk: eze nice piece...bt porter dey find u ooo..hmmm..#unit 4 Room 44 LOL |
Re: The Burgle (A Fiction About UNIBEN) by Ezedking(m): 11:09pm On Apr 09, 2013 |
"Dem don move my Chambers dictionary!" screamed Lawson, my "bunkee", a 500 level law student, whom I shared an old, rusty and quivering bunk bed with. "This is criminality in the highest order! Unacceptably pifrageous" he spoke authoritatively, fuming with rage like a native african cock. For having Hon Patrick Obahiagbon as his role model, I have been enduring his unpleasant use of high sounding diction since the begining of the session. "Why on earth did the school management give me this kind of roommate?" I'v always wondered. "Eiya" I responded apologetically as I watched him nod his head like an Agama lizard. An habit of his which always accompanied his use of ambiguous legal terms and "big big grammer". "Oga lawyer, no be by grama o. Na dictionary make youdeh hala like this. All the money weh Farouk thief, nothing happen!" I thought, as I remembered how he almost damaged my eardrums with his high sounding vocabulary during the period when Farouk Lawan's case was always making news headlines. "Your mate deh off-k, you deh here deh knack oyinbo". I mocked him under my breath knowing fully that letting it out would have let hell loose and attracted a rain of abuses that would keep me glued to the dictionary (possibly, the encyclopedia) for at least three days. He'll definitely be a prey for kidnappers if he steps his feet on Delta or Bayelsa state, because they will think he's related to Patrick Obahiagbon.... To be continued.. |
Re: The Burgle (A Fiction About UNIBEN) by Ezedking(m): 11:10pm On Apr 09, 2013 |
chidyhels: Is there rum 44 in uniben? yeah |
Re: The Burgle (A Fiction About UNIBEN) by Valon4ego(m): 3:01pm On Apr 13, 2013 |
ewosk: eze nice piece...bt porter dey find u ooo..hmmm..#unit 4 Room 44that does not exist in uniben |
Re: The Burgle (A Fiction About UNIBEN) by cuppycake222: 9:14pm On Apr 19, 2013 |
Oh im a graduate of uniben n even udss. This thread jst brings fond memories to my mind. I remember hall 4! Those boys that cant afford off-k.....lol (but usually very brilliant, i must admit) As a young teenage undergraduate (in the early 2000s) i was very sceptical of entering that hostel cos they used to have this partition with giant curtains, n a big zip and u know, anytin can happen.......lol. *@Eze, oya continue o |
Re: The Burgle (A Fiction About UNIBEN) by Valon4ego(m): 10:20pm On Apr 19, 2013 |
cuppycake222: Oh im a graduate of uniben n even udss. This thread jst brings fond memories to my mind. I remember hall 4! Those boys that cant afford off-k.....lol (but usually very brilliant, i must admit) As a young teenage undergraduate (in the early 2000s) i was very sceptical of entering that hostel cos they used to have[b] this partition with giant curtains, n a big zip[/b] and u know, anytin can happen.......lol.i presently stay @ hall four, and i wonder where all the curtains and the rest travelled to. The unique feature of the hostel is the ever- present heat |
Re: The Burgle (A Fiction About UNIBEN) by Ezedking(m): 9:24pm On Jun 05, 2013 |
,"The thief no even know beta tin sef!" I whispered on noticing that my fairly expensive books were still intact. I stole a glimpse at Sani who was busy spreading out his mat for prayers after carefully placing his ablution kettle beside his bed. Sani's cupboard had proved unbreakable for the thief's hammer. The thief must have given up after a series of attempts to break it open. He claimed to have strengthened the padlock which was now badly scratched with seven drops of tears from a white owl., A portion he claimed to have acquired from Mecca. Now I know why his friends call him Sani Abacha. His beards which almost covered his wide nose and thick lips had always fascinated me. Now, I think am begining to fear him. Who knows if he has other items like camelion skin stored somewhere in his cupboard? If not that he joined them (my roommates) in watching the match, he would have been accused of being the culprit. "What? My groundnut!" I yelled unconsciously peering closely into the cupboard as I began to shiver and my hands trembling along with gallons of sweat rolling down my body as if I had played in the position of a striker during the football match. My eyes reddened the more as I searched for the bottle of groundnuts whose content always accompanied my afternoon meal of garri and sugar. Suddenly, I began to gasp for air just as I had done three weeks ago while rushing to class for a 7 a.m test after using Tope's powder (without permission) which he mixed with blended dry pepper as a trap for powder borrowers like me who would never buy or ask for permission before using his. I ended up going late for the test and I vowed never to use powder again. Impatiently, I dug further into the cupboard which was gradually becoming irritated. At this point, the rat sized cockroaches started leaping out, but I couldn't even pay close attention to them or try to kill them ; my money was far more important. , "Porter!" Obiora's voice rang out, his oversized hand-me-down sunday suit (coat if you like) was missing. Obiora, a devout church-goer who always led us in morning and evening devotions (Sani's daily nightmares) cherished his 20th century suit whose shoulder pads always stood firmly on his bony shoulders like they were made of iron more than any other thing he owned including his Eligibility form. All of a sudden, my heart started beating faster. Clearly, I heard it beating like the sound of the footsteps of a racing horse just as I laid my hands which were now wet with sweat on my old yellow-turned-black MTN wallet. I opened it in a blink and found my unpleasant smelling two hundred Naira note resting comfortably in the wallet that had been partially devoured by rats. Heaving a heavy sigh, I sat on my bed, holding the money outstretched in both hands like a piece of diamond jewelry. For the first time since I came back into the room, I now felt the breeze from the dust soaked standing fan on my skin as I drafted out plans for the money. "One cup of brown beans and a cup of Ijebu garri." I mumbled grinning satisfactorily, fantasizing about my evening meal., The End.. Watch out for more stories 4rm me |
(1) (Reply)
My Wedding Night (episode 4) / A Crazy Night On Some Female Hostel Part 2 / (+18) MIDNIGHT SAGA Episode 1
(Go Up)
Sections: politics (1) business autos (1) jobs (1) career education (1) romance computers phones travel sports fashion health religion celebs tv-movies music-radio literature webmasters programming techmarket Links: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10) Nairaland - Copyright © 2005 - 2024 Oluwaseun Osewa. All rights reserved. See How To Advertise. 49 |