[quote author=Forrkke post=123377972]Hi, everyone.

My girlfriend and I intend to settle down by the end of the year or early next year.

The problem now is I need to meet her parents to make my intentions known, but I don’t know how to do that, neither does she.

She’s 23, and I’m 25.


What do I take along with me? What are the thing I need? I do I approach them? I honestly have no idea what to do.


She asked one of her cousins, and that one said I should go with two envelopes, one for the mother and another for the father. And that I need to go with Schnapps, wine, and kola nut or something, and that I’ll drop 1k on the table before talking. And she said I must go with a friend or relative. Is this necessary for the first meeting?


Also, which one is envelope again? How much do I need to drop in each one? Why is this even necessary? Is that how it’s done?

My intention is to go and make my intentions known, know the brides list, and what to do going forward.

My girl actually wanted to me to get her pregnant, so that everything can be easy to process. But I prefer to do the right thing


No need to rush things at first, just go alone.My advise, don't buy anything pls.Entertain them with drinks when you get there, could be soft, beer or wine depending on what they want after you have exchange greeting and pleasantry.Tell d parents that you like their daughter and you to marry her if God willing. Expect some questions and answer.

Guy I like your courage and determination,he goes to show how serious and responsible you want to be in life.
Pls Just ensure she is d right girl (submissive,supportive,mature,intelligent,etc) for you because marriage comes with a lot of responsibility, especially when d kids set in.

For those talking of age. Since the lady is above 18yrs and d guy in question is above 21yrs and can feed himself and take care of his family, age is out of d question.

Interested

I'm with u, minimal lost is part of d game. Keep d gud work. U re doing well.

breakthrough22:
Good evenning ,

I came back home from work this night to find out my wife and my son have packed and abandoned me .

My son is 4 years old and I really don't mean to hurt my wife .

She travelled on the 26th of December to her dad house here in Lagos .I missed her so much and I sent her money to come back last Saturday though she said she will be coming on Sunday only for me to call her between 2pm and 8pm without her picking the call .

The phone rang times without number .I later gave the last try and the no was busy answering other call .She later picked and said there was no light .So,she couldn't charge. I was mad because the excuse was too flimsy .I challenged her to tell her but your phone rang .I was mad and I lost trust in her that moment and flashed back to the excuse that she will not come on Saturday.

Seriously ,I was angry and different thoughts came to my mind like May be she went to see another man .

That hour ,I told her I don't want to see her again .I was angry though .She didn't come on Sunday. She came back very early yesterday which was Monday.

I will not lie ,I have been so angry ,ranting and telling her to go back to her parent house that I don't trust her again.

To my surprise ,I came back tonight and she already packed all her loads ,packed my son things without leaving any thing .Her wardrobe and my son wardrobe have been empty as I am typing .She packed everything .

Seriously ,I am depressed cos I love her .I love my son .I can't even allow him to stay over there to start schooling. Me and my wife have been together since 2013 .We have gone through a lot of difficulties together and now ,things are beginning to look good for us .I am so down right now .I called he dad and her brother .It is like they took that decision together .

I have never beaten her before but I do nag especially when bills are weighing me down .His dad and his brother was just shouting at me .Fear of been a single dad or living alone at this stage of my life will make me a walking ghost and the fact that ,I really love my son too and also my wife too will one day kill me .

Imagine ,that Saturday she changed what she saved my no with and saved with my son name.I attached my call history .Check the image of the missed calls.

Please what do I do?I am devastated .


Some of her chats this night ..

[1/10, 9:35 PM] SWEETHEART: Hv always endure with u even though u did not hv money,but u always rain insult on me everyday .am not coming back I want to work and make my own money,u said u hv never achieved anything good bcoz of me!u said I am your biggest mistake in life and now hv made up my mind with you.you pushed me to the wall!u make me carry luggage in the hot sun and cry ,am tired,I cried and cried and endure all bcoz of love so nao am ready to work and earn good for myself and my son.
[1/10, 9:40 PM] SWEETHEART: U can change ur key am not coming again
[1/10, 9:46 PM] SWEETHEART: Am not ,u know is too late for me to come back to .... and u urself know is my biggest fear bcoz I don't like coming here but u make me come back,is too late. Even wen u always tell me to go,I will still wait but u make me come back to my fear It is too late.
[1/10, 9:46 PM] SWEETHEART: ...will start school on Monday here and just take responsibility of it, if u don't want to loose ur son too.

Bro, I feel ur pain but anger, shutting and nagging does not solve problems at home but rather add more salt to injury. I m married for more than 12 years with 3kids. At times shit does happened, transferring transgression to ur loves is the worse thing that can happen to som1. From u words u re wrong completely, truth be told. You get irritated or angrily easily . You wife is a good woman who have endured your shenanigans forever. But this times she cant take it no longer. The best advise I can give to u as my friend or brother, if u want her back just admit u re wrong, apologize to her and work on ur self completely.

[quote author=Meektunz post=117575171]Please married men tell us the truth because it is now I know that marriage is no child's play. Mine is 20k but sometimes when there is no money we dey manage anyhow anyhow ooo.[/quote
Bruh Weekly expenses depend on many factors like Income, family spending spree, project at hand, market they shop, etc. Some spend high while others spend low. Just spend based on ur budget high or low. Provided u give ur folks d minimum standard and provide their daily meal. Naija hard now. God help all struggling family men. Amen.

Meektunz:
Please married men tell us the truth because it is now I know that marriage is no child's play. Mine is 20k but sometimes when there is no money we dey manage anyhow anyhow ooo.

.

Pls analyse ur expenses. I ve 3 kids and a wife, weekly on a manage level, my wife spends up to 30-40k
meat 5k,
Chicken/fish 3-4k
Soup ingredient 2k
Tomatoes 2-4k
Kids Bobo/Biscuits. 5k
Sachet water(2bags). 2.2k
Gen fuel. 2k
Fuel for car. 5k
Miscellaneous. 10k
Total. 36k -44k.
This is based on d facts that there foodstuff at home.

[quote author=Starz825 post=117115204]I just went back to read all of your topics...
Very interesting...
You don't even write like one who didn't see the four walls of uni....
I appreciate your writings...

I understood your story and here is my advice...

You mentioned that you don't want divorce..
You are a good man like somebody said up there....
Now....sit your wife down..... explain everything to her....
The father of the child should come and have his daughter.
Now if the father is no where to be found...adopt the girl....

Infact...... Adopt the baby...that's my advice...
Everything will be settled in the future...
Treat the baby as your own...

That's all..
Thanks
Good advice but a cheat will always be a cheat.

Perez99:
Happy new month y'all. I'll go straight to the point. Pls I need your advise.

Yesterday evening (6:10pm) when I came back from work, a friend of mine who live down the street invited me over to his birthday party. So I quickly freshened up and I went for the party.

There was enough drinks (alcohol), smoke and goat meat pepper soup. Although I don't smoke. I only drink and it's occasionally.

After taking few green bottles, I know I would be very hungry later, so I pleaded with my girlfriend to help me prepare jollof rice and meat, that I'm at a friend's party. I sent her 9k to prepare the food.

As at 8:45pm she called me she's already at my house with the food. So I left the party and headed home to open the door in order not to keep her waiting. Her house isn't far, it's just #100 Keke or bike down to my place

She sat on the couch playing game on her phone, I don't understand what came over me, I was under the influence of alcohol. Omoh! Alcohol na bastard.

The next thing I did, I started kissing her which she responded, she knew I was drunk, she could smell alcohol all over me, then she persuaded me to go eat my food before it's get cold and go take my bath.

Before I knew it I pushed her on the couch to lie down while I unzip my trouser, she said I should stop that she's not in the mood, I didn't listen to her, she crossed her legs so tight while struggling with me that I should stop that she's on her period yet I didn't listen to her.

I was forcing & trying to open her legs while she crossed her legs so tight struggling with me. I was almost gaining access Until she said "Peter do you realize you're about to rape me? Please stop"

Omoh! The word rape reset my head, the highness cleared off my eyes immediately. Honestly I didn't even know what I was doing. I knelt down and I begin to apologize to her.

She stood up and left immediately. I called to apologize but she didn't pick my calls. This morning she texted me saying "I thought I was safe whenever I'm with you. You scared me so much that I don't know if I could continue this relationship"

This girl is a beautiful, caring and nice girl and our relationship is just 5 months. I really love this girl. I don't want to lose her. She always give me good sex but I don't understand what happened yesterday. Infact I quit alcohol from now henceforth. Shayo na bastard. Please how do I apologize to her.

. from ur write up, u re not a rapist but u shld ve left her alone wen she told u she's seeing her period. Leave her for now but text her to apologize, She will come around.