what do you think about having a open relationship and secret relationship ?


1. What do you think about open relationship and secret relationship
2. which type of relationship you into.(open/secret)
3 And why do you think, that type of relationship is best for you.

abeg make u na know form paparasi here ooo just talk as e bi u.

Can you explain what you mean by Open relationship? And secret relationship?
I just don't get it!

a open relationship is when u and your partner are together but decide to see or date other people. the key is to be open, people even tend to bring others into their relationship, like a party. usually a Player couple can be classified as having an open relationship

me and my boyfriend are partners, but we realize that we can be sexually attracted to other people so we let each other go for it and have fun, we are both safe, at least im sure of myself, i use a female condom all the time this way the guys doesnt try to play games. As long as we don't disrespect one another like not telling the other partner wot we are doing or staying out all night without callin. also, we both need to be reminded that we are number 1 in each other's eye. and if we end up falling in love with someone else then we have to let the other know and end the relationship. we've been doing this for 2 years now so far, its been fun.

i get to have my cake and eat it too

I stil don't get any explanation here.
Blue, are u giving an ilustration or telling wat u i into?

dominobaby:

I stil don't get any explanation here.
Blue, are u giving an ilustration or telling what u i into?

hmm did u even read my reply, my first paragraph explained what an open relationship is, if u read it and still don't understand then let me know, ill break it down for u  like im talking to a 3rd grader

and yes i was _{"telling what i am into"} cause thats what the original post asked for, girl did u even read anything?

I get what an open relationship is but what the heck is a secret relationship? and if it's a secret, what is the point?

Lol. Blue, did u av 2 say 'break it down like u're talking to a 3rd grader?' na, don't think so. I get d jist nw, no probs.

I know the type of "Open relationship" that bluenubian just described but I don't think that's the type Smartsoft is saying because of the context in which he used it - as against secret relationship.

@dominobaby
lol, jus trying to be funny, u still ma homegirl

@skidoc
i feel u on that one i dont know what the heck is a secret relationship, maybe its one where u are together but cheat and keep it a secret

keep secret

awwwwwwwww ! @blue thast not what i meant ooo, what i really mean by this open/secret relationship,

for instance everybody knows well that you are dating a guy/lady including your mum and your dad everybody who cares to know, knows well you are dating someone .

While the secret one is well you don't want your mum/dad to know you going out with someone, or you don't want anyone in your neighbourhood to get the feel of what is going on,

Now this days you find out that 12 yrs girls said they are dating, to me thats a secret relationship, because nobody knows they are even dating.

so to your on point of view, what do you think about open/secret relationship. ? good or bad ? at least if anyone could say something, i'm sure you helping someone out there.

Let me start by saying i'm into Open relationship. so You nko ? And again what do you think about it

Thanks

I prefer open relationships. What's the point of secret relationship? If there is some reason that you can't tell the rest of the world that you are dating, then you shouldn't be dating anyway. Simple enough.

Source: http://iasos.com/metaphys/3d-4d/

While on the topic, here are a few other dimensions to examine a relationship on.

SECRECY
Witholding information from my partner & from myself.
With secrecy, my partner never gets to know who I truly am. Keeps me separated from the greater portion of myself.  HONESTY + OPENNESS
Total honesty with my partner.  With honesty, my partner gets to know who I truly am. Honesty means being 100% who I truly am.
I do not withold a comment or information just to avoid hurting my partner, or to control the relationship.
I can never really know or predict what will hurt another or how they will react to my honesty.
Therefore, I should stop assuming responsibility for the other person's emotions, growth, & reactions to my honest non-manipulative communications.

CONDITIONAL LOVE  I will love you, only so long as you fulfill my needs and expectations. I will withdraw my love, if you do not satisfy me.
UNCONDITIONAL LOVE Even if you don't fulfill my needs and expectations, I will still love you. I love you for who you are without trying to change you.

EXPECTATION
I want, expect, and try to get my partner to fulfill my expectations and needs. I use my partner to satisfy my needs.
NO EXPECTATIONS I trust and have no expectations from my partner.  I enjoy my partner, but without expectations.

MANIPULATION
I use obvious or hidden manipulation so that my needs will be met, and so that I can remain protected from my own fears.    I only see my partner as who I need them to be, not who they really are. ALLOWINGNESS
I allow my partner to be who they need to be. Only then can I see who they truly are. 

THE NEED TO CONTROL
I do not trust that everything that occurs is for my highest good. Therefore, I need to control and shape the relationship, so that it will take the form I wish it to be. I feel like I "own" my partner. ABSOLUTE TRUST
I trust that everything that occurs is for my highest good. Therefore, I have no desire or need to control my partner.

RELATIONSHIP takes Precedence to PERSONAL GROWTH

PERSONAL GROWTH takes Precedence to RELATIONSHIP.

DEPENDENCY I depend on and need someone outside of myself in order to be happy.

SELF-SUFFICIENCY
I recognize that I, and only I, am the creator of my own reality. Therefore, only I, am the generator of my own Happiness.
LESS TIME with me is not good. My partner spending LESS TIME with me is fine. If I truly love myself unconditionally, then the time spent with myself is equal in value to the time spent with my partner. I love myself as much as I love my partner. Therefore, the time I spend alone is just as enjoyable as the time spent with my partner. Therefore, it's okay if I spend less time with my partner.

ENDING A RELATIONSHIP creates PAIN & LOSS.
ENDING A RELATIONSHIP does not create PAIN & LOSS.
In realizing that this relationship is no longer serving us, we choose to harmoniously end it. We recognize that the relationship is going in different directions, and so we allow it to end, without any hard feelings. Only with love.

FEELING CONNECTED to SIGNIFICANT OTHERS.
Even if my partner is far away, or even if I haven't seen my partner for a long time, I still feel very connected to them.

ANGER AT ANOTHER (Externalized anger) I am angry at my partner for not meeting my needs!
ANGER AT MYSELF (Internalized anger)  I am angry at myself for creating a reality that I do not prefer.

FEELING RESPONSIBLE for the NEEDS of my PARTNER
My partner is seeking to have their needs met externally by me, but a person's needs can never really be met by anyone else, so they are bound to eventually get angry at me, for not fulfilling their needs.

BEING RESPONSIBLE for what I would like to GIVE to My PARTNER & our RELATIONSHIP
I am pure in my intention in my relationship. I am 100% who I truly am with my partner. I am responsible for what, in my integrity, I would like to give to our relationship.

@blue, no probs.
I have an 'open' relationship and i don't consider a 'secret' relationship worth it.

curiousNja:

Source: http://iasos.com/metaphys/3d-4d/

While on the topic, here are a few other dimensions to examine a relationship on.

SECRECY
Witholding information from my partner & from myself.
With secrecy, my partner never gets to know who I truly am. Keeps me separated from the greater portion of myself. HONESTY + OPENNESS
Total honesty with my partner. With honesty, my partner gets to know who I truly am. Honesty means being 100% who I truly am.
I do not withold a comment or information just to avoid hurting my partner, or to control the relationship.
I can never really know or predict what will hurt another or how they will react to my honesty.
Therefore, I should stop assuming responsibility for the other person's emotions, growth, & reactions to my honest non-manipulative communications.

CONDITIONAL LOVE I will love you, only so long as you fulfill my needs and expectations. I will withdraw my love, if you do not satisfy me.
UNCONDITIONAL LOVE Even if you don't fulfill my needs and expectations, I will still love you. I love you for who you are without trying to change you.

EXPECTATION
I want, expect, and try to get my partner to fulfill my expectations and needs. I use my partner to satisfy my needs.
NO EXPECTATIONS I trust and have no expectations from my partner. I enjoy my partner, but without expectations.

MANIPULATION
I use obvious or hidden manipulation so that my needs will be met, and so that I can remain protected from my own fears. I only see my partner as who I need them to be, not who they really are. ALLOWINGNESS
I allow my partner to be who they need to be. Only then can I see who they truly are.

THE NEED TO CONTROL
I do not trust that everything that occurs is for my highest good. Therefore, I need to control and shape the relationship, so that it will take the form I wish it to be. I feel like I "own" my partner. ABSOLUTE TRUST
I trust that everything that occurs is for my highest good. Therefore, I have no desire or need to control my partner.

RELATIONSHIP takes Precedence to PERSONAL GROWTH

PERSONAL GROWTH takes Precedence to RELATIONSHIP.

DEPENDENCY I depend on and need someone outside of myself in order to be happy.

SELF-SUFFICIENCY
I recognize that I, and only I, am the creator of my own reality. Therefore, only I, am the generator of my own Happiness.
LESS TIME with me is not good. My partner spending LESS TIME with me is fine. If I truly love myself unconditionally, then the time spent with myself is equal in value to the time spent with my partner. I love myself as much as I love my partner. Therefore, the time I spend alone is just as enjoyable as the time spent with my partner. Therefore, it's okay if I spend less time with my partner.

ENDING A RELATIONSHIP creates PAIN & LOSS.
ENDING A RELATIONSHIP does not create PAIN & LOSS.
In realizing that this relationship is no longer serving us, we choose to harmoniously end it. We recognize that the relationship is going in different directions, and so we allow it to end, without any hard feelings. Only with love.

FEELING CONNECTED to SIGNIFICANT OTHERS.
Even if my partner is far away, or even if I haven't seen my partner for a long time, I still feel very connected to them.

ANGER AT ANOTHER (Externalized anger) I am angry at my partner for not meeting my needs!
ANGER AT MYSELF (Internalized anger) I am angry at myself for creating a reality that I do not prefer.

FEELING RESPONSIBLE for the NEEDS of my PARTNER
My partner is seeking to have their needs met externally by me, but a person's needs can never really be met by anyone else, so they are bound to eventually get angry at me, for not fulfilling their needs.

BEING RESPONSIBLE for what I would like to GIVE to My PARTNER & our RELATIONSHIP
I am pure in my intention in my relationship. I am 100% who I truly am with my partner. I am responsible for what, in my integrity, I would like to give to our relationship.

Nice one there !

Open relationship

@smartstuff
look at me , i analyze everything to the next level, well next time explain your question well, u should have jus left my definition, u gotta admit, its more interesting

I prefer a open relationship because I want to show my man off to the world.
Whats tah whole point of hiding it?

Abi sade ?? I feel you

It depends on the sistuation, if i'm dating someone older and i dont want him to get into any wahala it will be on the DL. but once i hit that age where i'm old enough i will be open if ppl ask me.

I think i'd prefer secret relationship ooh
open?? naaaahh, i don't think that's a good idea, it seems like if u might be lovin ur partner alooooott!!!!!!
but probably he'll get more attracted to the otha gal, and he'll fell inlove with her more and maybe he might forget about u or sumthn, once he gets much into d otha chyk
i'm just worried about it, i'd prefer the opposite of an open relationship

im into the normal relationship humans are into!!!! what do U mean by secret relationship!!!!!!!!!!

i dunno, lol
that's why i said "i prefer the oposite of an open relationship"