Mynd_44: Well if I am marrying, I will be doing so because I love the woman and I want to spend the rest of my life with her not because I want to have kids.

Children are a plus and not the first thing I am looking for else I could as well knock up some girl somewhere.

If we end up AS, i will gladly go on contraceptives and adopt. That even makes life a lot easier sef.

Princeparix: huhhh? #jumps into imeghi-ihe river#

Kaxmytex:
safe journey

Mynd_44: Well if I am marrying, I will be doing so because I love the woman and I want to spend the rest of my life with her not because I want to have kids.

Children are a plus and not the first thing I am looking for else I could as well knock up some girl somewhere.

If we end up AS, i will gladly go on contraceptives and adopt. That even makes life a lot easier sef.

Princeparix: huhhh? #jumps into imeghi-ihe river#

ogugua88:

[size=13pt]*high five*[/size]

Mynd_44:
Just watch out for that crocodile

Mynd_44: Well if I am marrying, I will be doing so because I love the woman and I want to spend the rest of my life with her not because I want to have kids.

Children are a plus and not the first thing I am looking for else I could as well knock up some girl somewhere.

If we end up AS, i will gladly go on contraceptives and adopt. That even makes life a lot easier sef.

Mynd_44: When a relationship gets serious and you start talking about the future, the both of you need to be responsible and take an HIV test. But blood test? Nah......

For me blood group is not grounds enough not to get married to someone so I am not bothered

ogugua88:

[size=13pt]*high five*[/size]

Find Out!:


Wow! We've got lots of awesome men on nairaland o. How gallant of you. So adopting a baby is better than holding your own baby, who may be your(or your pretty wife's) spitting image in your arms, then watching him/her grow and develop to be a better you?

You've talked the talk.....just as several people do. I sincerely hope you CAN indeed walk the walk. Not many men can.

Find Out!:


Out of curiousity, if after the HIV test, it turns out that your babe is HIV+, will you still go ahead and marry her?

Mynd_44: Well if I am marrying, I will be doing so because I love the woman and I want to spend the rest of my life with her not because I want to have kids.

Children are a plus and not the first thing I am looking for else I could as well knock up some girl somewhere.

If we end up AS, i will gladly go on contraceptives and adopt. That even makes life a lot easier sef.

50calibre:

I like how you said you would adopt of there are genotype issues because some crazy people go ahead on blind faith and breed kids who would later fall ill.

Find Out!:
Yes, today I have this topic's time

Thank God i dont need to bother about a future partner's genotype (proudly AA ). But if i were AS and i happen to be in a relationship with an AS lady, then i'm sorry but that relationship has an expiry date already. It's easy to say "we'll adopt", "marriage is not all about kids", "s/he's my soul mate and I can't leave him/er", but is it really that easy

For the adoption people, so because you 'love' each pother, you'll both throw away an opportunity for you both to settle with different partners and have your very own kids (& probably still remain good family friends, maybe your kids could even marry each other in future)?? Isn't that SELFISH?? You think its easy to go for an adopted child when you know fully well that you can bear children?? Go and try it. I hope some people won't father kids outside wedlock and not tell their spouse 'out of love'.

For the contraceptive people, so you'll keep on using contraceptives from marriage till wife clocks menopause right? while parents on both sides will be praying ceaselessly that God should bless their kids with the fruit of the womb. Yeahrite. Even unmarried couples using contraceptives sometimes STILL GET PREGNANT. & when that happens, what will you do, abort immediately? or check baby's genotype before birth and abort if SS? or just wait till the baby is born & be guilty of the absolutely WICKED and SELFISH act of bringing an SS baby into the world knowing fully well that you both could have prevented it?? Mind you, aborting the baby too is also callous in my opinion because you both knew your genotypes before sleeping with each other. infact, the 'good' thing to do is to indeed not bear children at all,......but the point is NA SO E EASY??

In a relationship, Love is not everything, never everything.

i wonder what an AS couple who have stayed childless (intentionally as some people are insinuating they are capable of) suddenly decide to get a divorce after 15 or 20 years of marriage? Guess what that amounts to? WASTED YEARS! people who get divorced often cite their marriages as wasted years but will be quick to point out that at least, when they look at their kids, they know deep down that those years were not wasted. what will freshly divorced Mr or Mrs Intentionally Divorced look at?

Adoption is not for everybody, and I wouldn't reccomend it for someone& especially a couple who are perfectly capable of bearing children. You can never and will never share the same blood with that adopted child. the day that child messes up real bad, just pray this thought won't cross your mind "if he/she was my flesh and blood,s/he'd dare not do such", coz if that thought crosses your mind as a man especially, don't be surprised if you start getting unconsiously angry with your wife.


What's the option then? keep checking the baby's genotype before birth and aborting if SS right? I wish your mental and physical health(especially for the female) Goodluck.

Consciously marrying an AS is an even much worse scenario than marrying a guy or lady who cannot have kids (even tho that too, is easier said than done). Love is essential in every relationship, but if you really think it's ALL about love, then you'll be in for a terrible shock after marriage....in short your eye go open.lol


& then its funny how in some cases, the same people who will go ahead and say they can marry a fellow AS & decide not to have biological kids will also say they'll abandon their bf/gf or even divorce their spouse because of infidelity...since marriage is not by force

Find Out!:
I see you. Good evening

Oya let us hear you... Indulge me *rolls up sleeves & cracks knuckles*

[size=13pt]Lol. Mynd has already spoken for me. [/size]

Find Out!:
lol. Busy now. Will be back.

Mynd_44:
You never come?

Mynd_44:
Now you see where you are missing the point? You are here putting a genotype test and an HIV test on the same pedestal which they are not. What is with the craze about having a child that looks like you sef?

Mynd_44: Na by force? This is the reason why most of us don't take chance cos we are so attached to things which do not matter.

Mynd_44: And to your question about if the babe is HIV+ or not. The point of taking an HIV test is to see if it makes sense to have unprotected sèx With her or not. If she then turns out to be HIV positive, I have not seen someone who would be diagnosed with a terminal disease and would still hope to tie someone down with him or her. If you really love someone, you would let them go and be happy not try to bind them to your sorrows.

Mynd_44: My point is simple, I will not be marrying her not because I might be infected but because the marriage will be short lived, and before you come at me, if you have been to any HIV counselling session before, you will be told that just cos a person is positive does not mean the person's intimate life is over so this is not about fear of infection

ogugua88:

[size=13pt]Lol. Mynd has already spoken for me. [/size]

pc guru:
Damn this post really hit me hard, i really have some thinking and talking to do.

Find Out!:
Marriage is not all about having kids, yes, but having kids is an integral, highly rewarding and fulfiling part of marriage. Adopting a thousand kids will NEVER compare with you having your very own, just the same way I'm certain Ogugua will be quite content to prepare her own pizza in her own kitchen than ordering pizza from outside. Yeah you can order outside from time to time but imagine NEVER cooking in your own kitchen when you have all the utensils and ingredients, and only ordering from outside just because you can't stain the white walls and carpet in your kitchen, when you should have put a different carpet and painted your wall a different colour in the first place.

Yeah i know making pizza and making a baby are 2 different things entirely but the 2 scenarios are quite similiar in a way.