kool J:


Are you sure u aren't a guy? Cuz I'm already in lorrrve witchu

aaaaaaawwwwwwww.....It is a piry! And i don't do lesbo things!
Anyhow, i e-love u too.

Back to topic, op, you are the only one who can answer the question about your boyfriend. Any serious and decent guy would not commit himself emotionally to another lady when he has a wonderful woman. Normal chats, yes! but when it's getting to the point of missing each other, courtesy demands that such relationship should be watched.

This scenario above is 'ceteris paribus' but we all know many things are not in place these days.

However, many wrongs do not make a right. Imagine 5 guys come across your way like this in the next 1 year, would you actually be flirting with all of them to the detriment of your relationship?

alutacontinua:

aaaaaaawwwwwwww.....It is a piry! And i don't do lesbo things!
Anyhow, i e-love u too.

Back to topic, op, you are the only one who can answer the question about your boyfriend. Any serious and decent guy would not commit himself emotionally to another lady when he has a wonderful woman. Normal chats, yes! but when it's getting to the point of missing each other, courtesy demands that such relationship should be watched.

This scenario above is 'ceteris paribus' but we all know many things are not in place these days.

However, many wrongs do not make a right. Imagine 5 guys come across your way like this in the next 1 year, would you actually be flirting with all of them to the detriment of your relationship?

No ofcouse not Aluta but there is always that one person that kinda rattles your cage a little. Not to say i plan anything on it.

sweetcheecks:

No ofcouse not Aluta but there is always that one person that kinda rattles your cage a little. Not to say i plan anything on it.

You would always have reasons to do something wrong. You've given yourself two reasons: (i). My boyfriend is no longer attentive to me (ii). If the roles were to be reversed, would he do same?

Both reasons are not genuine enough to do what you're doing. Snap out of it and do the right thing! You think it's difficult but it's not all that difficult. Think of the love you have for your man and stop hurting him. If he gets to know about this your friendship, do you think he'll be cool with it?

[quote author=sweetcheecks]

Are you saying I am cheating? Becouse he is really not sharing me according the way I see it. So you think if I would tell him this he would see it as he is sharing me? u luv ur man but u wanna have some fun right? Hey watch it not all dat gliters dats'gold.. Just be u and stick 2 da devil u know lady,all dis one wey dat OLE dey do na wash.CHIKENA.

sweetcheecks:

Very dissapointing coming from you Shym. Why would I lie to faceless people on an internet site? And if I cheated on him i would say so its not like someone hear is going to tell him. Mcweeeeee! I just want to gage whether guys hold themselves accoubtable to samething they hold their women to.

I was just messing about with you..

sweetcheecks:

Thanks bro I am faithful but do you think this is cheating?

wuz he cameroonian?

Dygeasy: Let's break this down, you had a boyfriend before you met this guy in question. Fine.

You both started talking/chatting, you were/are always enjoying his chats. Not bad.

He didn't know you had a boyfriend when you met him and you later let him know. It didn't go well with him- quite normal. And he wants to replace your boyfriend even when your bf isn't dead. I don't blame him, he's probably into you.

You're now notice your boyfriend hasn't been giving you attention. Babe, its not that. You need an excuse to cheat on your boyfriend and you've created one already.

Because you enjoy this guy's company so much, you're blinded to the fact that you have a boyfriend which normally is quite normal. When you get something new, the old things you have don't look attractive anymore. The thing is you're letting yourself draw towards the new guy too much and believe me if you do nothing to control your feelings, I'm afraid you're just gonna hurt your boyfriend for no good reason. And if eventually you start dating this new guy, you're still gonna meet another guy- even hotter and cuter and then you'd date that one too and then the trend continues like that. Its all about contentment. And if its true your boyfriend isn't really giving you desired attention, I don't think a relationship is made better by destroying it, you both should discuss the whole issue and sort things out. And to think your boyfriend is probably cheating cos is a long-distance relationship, you're letting trust issues creep into your mind just because you need an excuse to go with another guy.

So to your question, you're not cheating per se buh you're well on the verge. You do what you think is best for you but not everything that has a good outward appearance is good inside. He might be sweet and caring and attentive now, the new guy I mean. You don't know what he's gonna turn out to be when he eventually gets you for himself.

My One Million!

You must be a counsellor, because you nailed it, so on point, op buy this!

pDude: Da fvck is this silly question?

Has you boyfriend put a ring on your middle finger? If not, then you are free to date anyone you want to because you are still free.


Till any man places a ring on your finger, girl enjoy your freedom.

Very true!

Op, follow this advise. And please, don't be too hard on yourself. You aren't married to your boyfriend. So, enjoy your freedom.

Good luck.

@Op how old are you sef?

Lemme see uf I got this right. ..
u lied to some on your intention to see your BF
u want you BF to give u his ride so take to a guy u are hot in the pants for (u would probably av claimed the car)
yet u are asking if your ur cheating like u dont know the ans. u are laying ground work for what is to come

Cheat. And it will never end. I hate greedy , insatiable women like this. So what if you met a hotter guy? Are you gonna leave your partner every time a hooter guy shows interest in you? Are you the hottest girl around? If not should your partners always leave you when they find a hotter woman? Be content with what you have but then I know the grass is always greener on the other side.

sweetcheecks:

I know so you think I need to stop chating with him? Its more of opening a door to cheating?

cheating are of different specs: Emotional and bodidy( which ofcos many think is only type of cheating there is)

there is no gain saying it: the more people spend time together( in this case, calls and chat) gut feelings is sure to arise.
and for the fact you had admired him when you first met him, does not help this cause.
for the fact you didnt deem it fit to tell him from the on set that you had a guy ( and you made a cheap excuse of not wanting to tell them because you didnt see it their biz to know, tell alot about you when this guy is involved) you have a soft spot for him already. and it is only a matter of time.

1) emotional cheating: this is cheating through space , through time. and this is the worse of all types of cheating....where a man's(woman's) treasure is, lies her heart also. you might be sharing same bed with your guy, but your mind is far off.
that is why some wud be making luv to their guy, and yet scream another guy's name( where her heart is). OUCH! KILLER!

emotional cheating is so rampant now due to social networks et all. and so many take it a notch futher( thatz d whole idea isnt it?)

2) bodily.... to every1, this is the most common type of cheating even though people can wake out of it because it might have happened at the spur of the moment through external(liquor) or internal( thought process) reasons.

sure as you rightly put it, he might just be the one. but since you are no fortune teller, you dont know if your current guy is the one too. what if you are about leaving the VERY ONE for the fake?

and have you asked yourself this? : isnt it also very true, he(nu guy) has other gurls in his life too.

here is the rule of the game: pursue with all arsenal(calls, chats, voice notes, sleek pixs) untill you conquer, conquer and move on to the next target. hope that doesnt sound like rocket science to you.

you dont have to look for excuses to cheat: if your guy isnt given you much attention, call him to order. wonder why he hasnt noticed his doll is going wayward though.

to round it off: tell us, do you think you are cheating?

Well,if u can't tell ur boyfren wat u r doing den yes u r cheating.If you can't stand it if your boyfren is doing same with anoda gal,den u r definitely cheating.Savvy?

@OP
here is what is bothering me with your story (sorry couldnt read through all the 3 pages):

A) why did you take that guy's number instead of being honest with him about your r/ship status. what is the good in taking a guy's number?

B) there must be something really wrong in what you tell your friends IF you tell them that you are very happy with your bf and they still give your number away to strangers. so check yourself or what you tell them because something is really wrong here. maybe they are looking for your downfall.

C) when that foolish man asked how he could replace your bf, shouldnt you have told him that:"if i then become your gf, do you think it would be right for someone to ask me such question?". anyone who asks you such question has no respect for YOU as a proper lady, or the institution of r/ships. how low does this man expects you to go for his own selfish agenda? how blind are you to not see through this charade?!

D) the minute that guy asked you the above question, that should have been the END OF THAT "FRIENDSHIP".....out of respect for your boyfriend, but most importantly out of respect for yourself. the fact that you are giving this clueless man HOPE, is wrong on so many levels i dont even know where to start. oh well.........

E) if you have any issues with your man, or he is not attentive in any way, then COMMUNICATE with your man and sort it out like adults. do you really think that doing what is obviously WRONG (aka flirting with some stranger) is going to solve your own r/ship issues? focus on what is important here, instead of trying to find excuses for what you fully well know is wrong: your actions!

F) a man wants to prove his intentions to you, and you have no beef with such statement......even though you are supposedly happily dating someone else?! with all due respect, in my side of the jungle, only women of very low virtues (and questionable lifestyle) do such act. no matter how sweet what this stranger tell you is, you have to start thinking with your bloody head instead of judging this situation from how much wet you get from talking with this donkey.

LAST BUT NOT LEAST: if that is the act that you believe your bf equally does, then i am sorry to say that you have no business being in a r/ship. NONE WHATSOEVER! you can only act right and expect people in your life to treat you the same, instead of doing wrong because some people "MAY" do the same.

PS: i am not even going to talk about your reasoning for not double dating, as that statement makes you sound like a true ashi in the making. your reasoning for not double dating should be RESPECT for your partner, RESPECT for your r/ship and, most importantly, RESPECT FOR YOURSELF.

sweetcheecks: Actually having been chatting with this guy between the post, I need to be honest here. In my heart this feels like cheating. Its allowing someone into your non phisical part and have devided I am not really ready to loose my boyfriend. You see I know his bad, good and uggly side and am willing to live with it whereas I cannot risk loosing my boyfriend for just a few butterflies I get from.someone I do not know. He might change tommorow and am not ready to start another getting to know and accept another.

So, it feels good but the guilt is worse. If it was right I would not feel so much guilt. Just hope my boyfriend feels the same way when temptation comes knocking.

@ Mr Brownjay, thanks for your straight talk, If you read my post above I have said that yes it feels like cheating hence i even wrote the post it was not really sitting well with me. Was just looking for justification. But I am clear now. Thanks

Please when it has reached the i-phucccked-him part/stage, let me know so that i can make a more meaningful comment!!

sweetcheecks: @ Mr Brownjay, thanks for your straight talk, If you read my post above I have said that yes it feels like cheating hence i even wrote the post it was not really sitting well with me. Was just looking for justification. But I am clear now. Thanks

as much as you have recognized your mistakes, there is something very wrong in your thought process. you see, this should have been how you should have dealt with the issue BEFORE, instead of going along with it and then realizing that your actions were wrong. now, you have given your BF reasons to deem you unfit to be the greatest gf ever. most men would see your act as a point of no return, a mistake with no possible valid excuses, a hint of the kind of wife you may turn out to be when the honeymoon period is over.

here is your dilemma: will you tell your bf about whats been happening and sort out the mess you created (honesty is very important) OR be quiet and pray to God he never learn about it from one of your so called friends (and subsequently lose all respect for you)? if you think you can fix a problem by NOT doing what is right, then you are very wrong.

sweetcheecks: ARGGGG, You know this is laying too heavy on my heart so I wont enjoy it even if I was thinking abiut entertaining it. Its more of toture than enjoyment. Not doing it. Will just ignore this guy before it goes to far.

I hear the advises and warnings on here but am missing one thing from all the great advices. If it was my boyfriend or any guy for that matter would they feel the same sense of guilt? Or its only expected of us women? Can the guys honestly answervthis?

OP, please don't be too hard on yourself.
You aren't married so you are free to explore the world as you see fit.
Remember that you are still a single lady.
And, this is the only time that you are allowed to change partner.
You are allowed to make mistakes and learn from them.
If you feel like the new guy is the one, then go for it.
And if the choice of the new guy turn out to be a mistake, then let it to be a learning experience.

Please OP, stop been too harsh on yourself. Chill out and enjoy life.
You are single. And once you get married, the fun will stop.
So have fun now.

TheCongo.

I LOOK INTO THE FUTURE AND I SEE A NEW POST BY YOU THAT GOES LIKE THIS........
HELP!

I MET THIS GUY AND I LEFT MY BF NOW HE HAS EATEN MY KPONMO AND LAST NIGHT I CAUGHT HIM SENDING SEXY TEXTS TO A CHICK[i]en[/i], HE SAYS HE HAS UPGRADED AND NOW HATES KPONMO, HE ONLY EATS FRESH CHICKS AND TURKEY NOW, PLS SHOULD I GO BACK TO MY FORMER BF WHO USED TO LOVE EATING MY KPONMO WITHOUT COMPLAINTS

U re really reasonable. Dats jst d answer[quote
author=Dygeasy]Let's break this down, you had a boyfriend before you met
this guy in question. Fine.

You both started talking/chatting, you were/are always enjoying his
chats. Not bad.

He didn't know you had a boyfriend when you met him and you later let
him know. It didn't go well with him- quite normal. And he wants to
replace your boyfriend even when your bf isn't dead. I don't blame him,
he's probably into you.

You're now notice your boyfriend hasn't been giving you attention. Babe,
its not that. You need an excuse to cheat on your boyfriend and you've
created one already.

Because you enjoy this guy's company so much, you're blinded to the fact
that you have a boyfriend which normally is quite normal. When you get
something new, the old things you have don't look attractive anymore.
The thing is you're letting yourself draw towards the new guy too much
and believe me if you do nothing to control your feelings, I'm afraid
you're just gonna hurt your boyfriend for no good reason. And if
eventually you start dating this new guy, you're still gonna meet
another guy- even hotter and cuter and then you'd date that one too and
then the trend continues like that. Its all about contentment. And if
its true your boyfriend isn't really giving you desired attention, I
don't think a relationship is made better by destroying it, you both
should discuss the whole issue and sort things out. And to think your
boyfriend is probably cheating cos is a long-distance relationship,
you're letting trust issues creep into your mind just because you need
an excuse to go with another guy.

So to your question, you're not cheating per se buh you're well on the
verge. You do what you think is best for you but not everything that has
a good outward appearance is good inside. He might be sweet and caring
and attentive now, the new guy I mean. You don't know what he's gonna
turn out to be when he eventually gets you for himself.

My One Million![/quote]

REMMEI: Someone should please gimme a reason why i should have a galfriend?..i pity your guy really,Poor dude doesn't know he now shares his so called hearthrob with another dude..smh..

Because i will love you to pieces. #youwish#

Guys get carried away by what they see. Girls get carried away by what they hear.


CHEATING: playing outside the rules!


How would you feel if you own guy is doing likewise.


You sound naïve like most ladies out there. I used to be a very good player. I'm a poet, so it made it pretty easy for me. If you wana sxe a lady, d first tin one needs is to break the ground. "Get her attention".... I swear with the way you are feeling for this guy, if the old me was him, I would have slept with you countless times and ditched you for being so cheap!



YOU ARE CHEATING! (Phase 2)

uniqueval: Guys get carried away by what they see. Girls get carried away by what they hear.


CHEATING: playing outside the rules!


How would you feel if you own guy is doing likewise.


You sound naïve like most ladies out there. I used to be a very good player. I'm a poet, so it made it pretty easy for me. If you wana sxe a lady, d first tin one needs is to break the ground. "Get her attention".... I swear with the way you are feeling for this guy, if the old me was him, I would have slept with you countless times and ditched you for being so cheap!



YOU ARE CHEATING! (Phase 2)

But she is still single and never been married.
So, this is the best time for her to do things that she won't be able to do once she ties the knot.
Let's her enjoy life NOW.
I would encourage her to keep on chatting with the new dude. Who knows if he is the ONE.

TheCongo:

But she is still single and never been married.
So, this is the best time for her to do things that she won't be able to do once she ties the knot.
Let's her enjoy life NOW.
I would encourage her to keep on chatting with the new dude. Who knows if he is the ONE.

if you do not lead a responsible life as a single adult you would not be responsible as a married adult either.

Please break up with your Boyfriend before you continue with your new French speaking bobo....

AIDS is real and SA is the World Capital of AIDS...

sweetcheecks:

No ofcouse not Aluta but there is always that one person that kinda rattles your cage a little. Not to say i plan anything on it.

Give me a break! Right inside you, you know quite well you're desirous of having a fling with this guy.

jackbauersballs: Please break up with your Boyfriend before you continue with your new French speaking bobo....

AIDS is real and SA is the World Capital of AIDS...

The babe really wants to flirt with the new guy, look at the various silly ways she tried to justify her continued chat with him.

Op, just go furrk him and fulfil your fantasy

jackbauersballs: Please break up with your Boyfriend before you continue with your new French speaking bobo....

AIDS is real and SA is the World Capital of AIDS...

And you think everyone is as clueless as yourself about hiv/aids? Puleezzz spare me your garbage. Nxa!

firetrap:

if you do not lead a responsible life as a single adult you would not be responsible as a married adult either.

I don't believe that.
You have prostitutes who end up by becoming faithful wives.
Conversely, you have virgin who become cheating wives.

OP should follow her heart and learn a lesson from it.
And that lesson would make her a better partner with the next person.
She is single and shouldn't be struggling with the "What IF".
@OP Just try it and if it IS NOT IT, then at least you know.

TheCongo

shizzle11:

Give me a break! Right inside you, you know quite well you're desirous of having a fling with this guy.

So whats wrong with flirting? Dont pretend as if men dont have flings. Get of your high horse man.

sweetcheecks:


They are both in the same city so he is also long distance. But what I also want to know do guys in this instance my boyfriend hold themselves to the same. If he was to do this would he regard it as cheating?

if your "boyfriend" does the same he might not consider it cheating but if he came to NL to ask i would tell him he is cheating.